Jason Thor Hall / PirateSoftware / Maldavius Figtree / DarkSphere Creations / Maldavius / Thorwich / Witness X / @PotatoSec - Incompetent Furry Programmer, Blizzard Nepo Baby, Lies about almost every thing in his life, Industry Shill, Carried by his father, Hate boner against Ross Scott of Accursed Farms, False Flagger

[Palmer Bangs]

indistinguishable from what he writes now, and horrifying!

Truly horrifying code, thanks for uploading that. The code is my favorite part of the thread.

I find it interesting he'll start arrays with 1's or 0's, seemly randomly. I'm sure there's a good reason for it.

Also no wonder he doesn't want to finish this game. Imagine coming back after a break to this codebase and trying to remember which boss is "5", that he was supposed to say line "4, 5" while dealing passive damage from "5,6".

 

[hand holding faggot]

Also no wonder he doesn't want to finish this game. Imagine coming back after a break to this codebase and trying to remember which boss is "5", that he was supposed to say line "4, 5" while dealing passive damage from "5,6".

"They hit skyscrapers[227] and skyscrapers[228]!"

 

[MoarTard]

Better yet he knows very well that what he’s doing is very dumb because he cites Undertale on his website (A) as an example of bad programming not being required to make a game. There’s a short where he reiterates the claim as well.

The kick is that this kind of coding is exactly what undertale does, but Toby doesn’t pretend to be a god among programmers.

Mald wishes he could be like Toby Fox. But he won't ever make it to that level of renown like Toby due to his faggotry.

 

[GhastlyGhost]

Mald wishes he could be like Toby Fox. But he won't ever make it to that level of renown like Toby due to his faggotry.

Toby had already proven himself a skilled and successful individual before even thinking about making Undertale; Megalovania started life as a track for a Earthbound romhack.

 

[tarzor]

Amazon would allow them to run at a loss on using AWS as it helps promote the Twitch brand

We sure they care about promoting twitch?

hope im not too late on this, but

i would say it helps promote amazon further as well, and they definitely care about promoting twitch considering AWS IVS came from twitch, they also have a aws blog that boasts about twitch and their 'watch minutes' latency etc.

AWS IVS is twitch's video tech wrapped into AWS api, a decent amount of services use it from Kick to GoPro or startups that would want to stream without building a whole cdn, all giving kickbacks and further promoting amazon. recently amazon signed a ~$20b deal with the NBA to host games on prime video, most likely using IVS.

i think twitch acts like a tech incubator for ads, marketing, affiliate purchases, and streaming.
-

1. Get most bandwidth for free via peering agreements
2. Charge yourself thousands of dollars for that bandwidth for a stream
3. Claim you lose money on streaming

amazon has been in hot water with the ftc so i doubt they'd be making false claims and bring attention to their streaming ecosystem
if amazon isn't charging twitch properly, it could inflate AWS revenue which is illegal and investors would be mislead
even if twitch got some discounts amazon would still be treating them as a customer, because otherwise there'd be antitrust shit abound and sec would be involved

 

[Butter Waffle]

His rescue has absolutely no footprint at all anywhere and no paper trail.

His mishaps regarding software development, the law, and cyber security were always gonna be exposed. Lawyers, developers, and hackers can never shut up and there's plenty of them on the internet. The fact that now someone familiar with ferret welfare and rescue is casting a critical eye on his little ferret red room is hilarious to me .
Is all of his ferret-related stuff properly archived? I'm gonna archive all the ferret sites from his wiki to archive.today. Don't want Slippery Sue to wipe his tracks.

 

[Butter Waffle]

The Solutions Architect for example is one of their higher certs and takes like 2 recommendations from 2 separate people before you can even take the test.

That's wrong. You can take any test whenever you want without recommendations. Doesn't matter if it's Specialty, Professional or Associate.

 

[1983 Opel Kadett]

i think twitch acts like a tech incubator for ads, marketing, affiliate purchases, and streaming.

Absolutely, without ads they wouldn't be able to afford the "free" amazon servers. There's ~5 million people streaming on twitch and they keep VODs for some time for basically all of them, that is not free. If you get in to like top 5% of streamers aka have more than 5 viewers consistently, they'll make you an affiliate and shove all the ads on your channel.

 

[el gordo]

why are you talking to your alts

 

[tarzor]

why are you talking to your alts

dont disrespect my hovercraft with sunroof for w/e tf that car is

also i bet youre australian for some reason

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

The only explanation I could think of is him doing some kinda 20D-Chess where more lines = more impressive code. (Usually wannabe geniuses in coding try to use as little lines as possible, which causes unreadable code).

Wizard of Oz shit. Show off fire, explosions, and a big head. It awes the meek and uninformed.
But in reality its just a sad man behind the curtains pulling levers.

 

[McSneaks]

Maldies in full damage control mode now https://x.com/PirateSoftware/status/1889641667424043110 (archive)
https://x.com/MaimFace/status/1889646473601589569 (archive)
View attachment 6973530View attachment 6973531

Using "terminally online children" as an insult when you literally stream videogames 20 hours every day (and only sleep 4 hours a day so you can gayme more) and your entire life revolves around being a super 1337 internet hax0r, pro gaymer, and master developer is wild.

Like I can guarantee with absolute certainty EVERY SINGLE PERSON who has ever said anything about him has spent at minimum 80% less time online than him. Every single one. And this is literally based on what he himself says, when he's not streaming he's "developing" (online on a computer) and when he's not doing that he's in discord crying. EVERY aspect of his entire life revolves around the internet. And he's not even "terminally online" in the sense of just being online, it's also in the actual connotation of that word considering he's a furry, discord pedo, and hangs out with trannies. He is THE terminally online soy. It's physically IMPOSSIBLE to be more terminally online than him.

its such a joy that he has the lolcow gene and needs to address every claim made against him as if he can solve it

"Ok first off I did not have sex with a cat, it was a ferret, and it wasn't sex because I couldn't penetrate. Also I was 14 (*23) not 16, and there was no fursuit it was a furhead. Bunch of terminally online stalkers (said 9 hours into a 22 hour stream on his 187th consecutive day) making things up"

 

[UNIXLover]

i doubt they'd be making false claims

Amazon and Twitch are still separate entities even though Amazon owns Twitch. It would not be a false claim to say that the entity known as Twitch loses money hosting a stream if IVS is made to be very expensive.

it could inflate AWS revenue which is illegal and investors would be mislead

When Amazon reports revenue they will do consolidation. The revenue of Amazon that came from Twitch will be cancelled out by the expense that Twitch made to Amazon.

 

[Black Willow Lurker]

Here's a bit of a blast from the moldy SKG past (the clip is from March 26, so that was actually before SKG). Mald goes full(er) retard and screeches "THAT IS MINE!!!!111111oneone" for 11 minutes:

Probably the best part of the whole thing is @ 07:30 where he actually says he "files 50 to a 100 [DMCAs] usually a week, frankly, and [he has] for years" which is fucking mindblowing. But apparently ShartBound is *so amazing* that people feel compelled to take stuff from it.

The hypocricy of "government enforcing copyright is good, but I don't want government regulation" is rather amusing. @ 9:10 there's a fun little segment where he seems to claim that not only open-source somehow erases copyright, but that it "limits innovation in a way that it becomes impossible to create", although that's so retarded that I'm like 50/50 on whether or not I'm just misunderstaning what he's attemtping to say here.

Fucking PIRATE "software", by the way.

Mald shows his "art" "collection" in the same stream.

 

[Dopeypal]

You’ll have to express that as a switch statement for Maldy to comprehend it.

Spoiler: switch statement

switch (age) { case 0: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 1: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 2: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 3: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 4: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 5: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 6: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 7: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 8: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 9: legally_fuckable = false; //unless you're mohammed pbuh break; case 10: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 11: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 12: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 13: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 14: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 15: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 16: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 17: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 18: legally_fuckable = true; break; default: legally_fuckable = true; }

I think the switch would be more accurate if you wrapped it with a null check for a gender parameter.

If gender equals null, legably_fuckable is always true.

 

[Creepypasta Mario]

Holy crap I step away from this thread for a couple days to try and touch grass (in other threads) and suddenly I miss the 350 pagecount. At this rate we'll reach 400 in like a month! I was going to make more Maldy art but I might have to do something special for that milestone. Hopefully we can keep up this autism train so I can post something for it.

Anyway good on @Delusion Enjoyer for doing your due diligence researching into to shelter aspect for Maldy's ferrets. Even if it turned up little and was kinda redundant for this thread, I respect the hustle!

EDIT: Anyway, to tide you guys over, have a quick one of our favorite Convoluted Codemaster playing the song of his people with help from his closest friend.

(Yeah this one is garbage, I drew this at almost 2AM gimme a break I'll probably clean it up for use in the special thing I mentioned)

 

[CaptainGarbage]

"files 50 to a 100 [DMCAs] usually a week, frankly, and [he has] for years

It's probably him dmca-ing anyone who criticizes the game or him, just abusing the system as he's been known to do.

there's a fun little segment where he seems to claim that not only open-source somehow erases copyright, but that it "limits innovation in a way that it becomes impossible to create", although that's so retarded that I'm like 50/50 on whether or not I'm just misunderstaning what he's attemtping to say here.

I think he's trying to say, it limits creation. However this is still retarded and the whole entire sentiment is just retarded and factually wrong for multiple reasons. I'm amazed at some of the shit people eat because the person saying it sounds like an authority figure.

• Open Source does not erase copyright, OSS is still copyrighted, but the authors choose to license it under terms that allow others to use, modify, and distribute it, usually with some conditions. Licenses like the GPL, MIT, and Apache License explicitly define how the software can be used while maintaining the original author's rights.
• Open Source often drives innovation. Some of the biggest technological advances have come from open source projects. Examples include: Linux, The Internet, which relies on open source technologies like Apache, Nginx, and OpenSSL. AI and Machine Learning, where frameworks like TensorFlow and PyTorch have led to massive advances. Programming language implementations are generally open source, which thrive due to open source contributions. There's so many examples it's mind blowing someone can even think that open source some how limits innovation.
• Proprietary software does not inherently promote more innovation. While closed source models may encourage investment through exclusivity, they can also hinder progress by preventing collaboration and creating redundancy (like multiple companies developing similar software instead of improving existing tools).
• In reality, open source enables both innovation and commercial success. It can shift business models (from selling licenses to offering support and cloud services) but it does not prevent creation, it largely accelerates it.
• Open source software often pushes proprietary software to evolve by setting higher standards, introducing innovations, and increasing competition. Companies behind closed source products are frequently forced to adapt, improve, or offer better pricing to stay relevant. Like how Microsoft open sourced VS Code and integrated Linux into Windows, or Adobe enhancing its tools in response to open source alternatives like GIMP and Krita.

People will also create open source things regardless if there is a business opportunity or not.

His takes are so unironically braindead it makes me believe he has only 100 children/adult-children watching and view bots the rest. I don't understand how none of the programmer streamer/video creator "friends" won't talk about his braindead takes or his shit coding. None of them have backbones, are using him to gain more viewers, or they literally never watched or listened to the faggot for longer than a few mins. I'm leaning in the 'they are using him and never watched or listened' camp. Or maybe they are complete faggots themselves, which is probably the case regardless.

"Proprietary software is the future" he proclaims; while handing you a business card reading "Pirate Software."

 

[thx1138]

Has he ever responded to the counter to his argument about "forcing" companies to continue to support MMOs when there's actual 3rd party private servers for the very game he allegedly "worked on" as a nepobaby at Blizz?

 

[Kheapathic]

Has he ever responded to the counter to his argument about "forcing" companies to continue to support MMOs when there's actual 3rd party private servers for the very game he allegedly "worked on" as a nepobaby at Blizz?

I don't think he's engaged anyone directly, just mostly preached from the pulpit to his chat that he's right, people who say otherwise are wrong and stupid. Very DSP of him.

 

[The Tall Man]

Here's a bit of a blast from the moldy SKG past (the clip is from March 26, so that was actually before SKG). Mald goes full(er) retard and screeches "THAT IS MINE!!!!111111oneone" for 11 minutes:
View attachment 6983697
Probably the best part of the whole thing is @ 07:30 where he actually says he "files 50 to a 100 [DMCAs] usually a week, frankly, and [he has] for years" which is fucking mindblowing. But apparently ShartBound is *so amazing* that people feel compelled to take stuff from it.

The hypocricy of "government enforcing copyright is good, but I don't want government regulation" is rather amusing. @ 9:10 there's a fun little segment where he seems to claim that not only open-source somehow erases copyright, but that it "limits innovation in a way that it becomes impossible to create", although that's so retarded that I'm like 50/50 on whether or not I'm just misunderstaning what he's attemtping to say here.

Fucking PIRATE "software", by the way.
View attachment 6983815
Mald shows his "art" "collection" in the same stream.

@2:30
This faggot really said that Notch would not have been able to make Minecraft if a requirement for an end-of-life plan had existed.
The ability to host your own Minecraft server was already in the alpha build.
What a retarded fraud.