Orbiter "Flutter" / "Egg" / "Cabbage Patch" / "Meryl" / "Food Lion lady" - Modern Christory's biggest mystery

ThatGuyWhoLikes The Chili said:
There's a reason we call it the "The Oedipus complex" and not the "Extremely complicated Greek Tragedy complex" because incidentally despite everything, Oedipus was and will always be known as that guy who fucked his mom despite everything else that happened in the story.
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and that's exactly why nobody knows that Oedipus didn't want to fuck his mom and was doing his best to avoid fulfilling his destiny to fuck his mom

seriously, i may not be able to think of many 'lolcows' in the kiwifarms sense but i can think of quite a few personalities and people of note who fucked one of their parents or family members
i can't think of a single other person who wrote sonichu
 
Cuntspiracy Man said:
and that's exactly why nobody knows that Oedipus didn't want to fuck his mom and was doing his best to avoid fulfilling his destiny to fuck his mom

seriously, i may not be able to think of many 'lolcows' in the kiwifarms sense but i can think of quite a few personalities and people of note who fucked one of their parents or family members
i can't think of a single other person who wrote sonichu
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"You see this bar? I built this bar with my own bare hands. I cut down every tree and made the lumber myself. I toiled away through the wind and cold, but do they call me McGreggor the bar builder? No."
He continued "Do you see that stone wall out there? I built that wall with my own bare hands. I found every stone and placed them just right through the rain and the mud, but do they call me McGreggor the wall builder? No."
"Do ya see that pier out there on the lake? I built that pier with my own bare hands, driving each piling deep into ground so that it would last a lifetime. Do they call me McGreggor the pier builder? No."
"But ya fuck one goat.."
 
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ThatGuyWhoLikes The Chili said:
"You see this bar? I built this bar with my own bare hands. I cut down every tree and made the lumber myself. I toiled away through the wind and cold, but do they call me McGreggor the bar builder? No."
He continued "Do you see that stone wall out there? I built that wall with my own bare hands. I found every stone and placed them just right through the rain and the mud, but do they call me McGreggor the wall builder? No."
"Do ya see that pier out there on the lake? I built that pier with my own bare hands, driving each piling deep into ground so that it would last a lifetime. Do they call me McGreggor the pier builder? No."
"But ya fuck one goat.."
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if McGreggor wrote Sonichu it'd be a different story

seriously tho, Chris' entire life is documented, he's not just some guy you briefly know, he has cemented every single part of his life in stone and most of what happened to him is so absurd and unlikely and different from every other thing, that it's just unreasonable to reduce it to one thing, no matter how big this thing seems, it can't define him because he's like a grab bag of fuck, pull out the biggest item in the bag and just refer to it as 'a bag holding a basketball' and you completely ignore the dead rats, bottles of cocaine and small pocket sized talking head of adolf hitler it also contains

never before has there been anyone as documented as Chris or whose life was so full of unlikely scenarios one after the other
 
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Cuntspiracy Man said:
if McGreggor wrote Sonichu it'd be a different story
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CWCSonichu_Rule34.jpeg
Well he DID also fuck Sonichu, but that's neither here nor there.
 
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Cuntspiracy Man said:
never before has there been anyone as documented as Chris or whose life was so full of unlikely scenarios one after the other
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Which is true, and I agree with what you're saying.

Thing is, the incest saga is arguably the cherry on top. It's not so much that it's the one thing that defines him as it's the one thing that just sort of tops it all off.

Granted, it's the one that seems to be the most fixated-upon, but that's probably just due to its nature.
 
Pickle Inspector said:
I dunno, looks kind of grey at the back to me, and wasn’t Chris’s natural hair colour brown and not black?:
View attachment 6986549
And a photo of Chris’s hair from 2012 (Taken from https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Hair#Condition):
View attachment 6986573
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They really should wash it, its so gross and thin.

King Kiwi said:
It's possible. Chris would do anything for pussy.

Of course what they're looking at is most likely a Shih Tzu, so maybe she's not a cat person.
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Chris 100% became trans as women told him they were a lesbian. Chris talks about how they can date both straight women and lesbians, if they were really trans they can't date a straight women.
 
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The Dude said:
Raped his mom...fucked his son...
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He should get into a rap battle with John Davis.

Though the idea of an over the top ostentatious rip off of a better character who was raped by his dad might bring back uncomfortable memories for the Korn frontman.
 
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But seriously, is no one concerned about the welfare of their potential dog?

We know he's already killed one cat and he neglected the beagles. When poor little Sorbet was seeking refuge under a car, Chris helpfully sprayed the little fellow with a hose to get him out.

There was the time that he screamed at the dogs to shut up and did something off screen and made them whimper and go quiet.

Yeah, Chris doesn't need pets. He needs a padded cell
 
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cugel said:
Chris 100% became trans as women told him they were a lesbian. Chris talks about how they can date both straight women and lesbians, if they were really trans they can't date a straight women.
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chris has such cartoony thinking and i love it sometimes
like he rationalized things that the average person, from life experience and rational logic, will tell you doesn't work- but chris comes in with his moon logic and MAKES it work
 
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King Kiwi said:
But seriously, is no one concerned about the welfare of their potential dog?

We know he's already killed one cat and he neglected the beagles. When poor little Sorbet was seeking refuge under a car, Chris helpfully sprayed the little fellow with a hose to get him out.

There was the time that he screamed at the dogs to shut up and did something off screen and made them whimper and go quiet.

Yeah, Chris doesn't need pets. He needs a padded cell
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I really hope it's like others said, he was there to buy pebbles for his Etsy scam and they just visited the pet section while there.

Keep pets away from Chris 2k4ever.
 
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Ammyterasu said:
I really hope it's like others said, he was there to buy pebbles for his Etsy scam and they just visited the pet section while there.

Keep pets away from Chris 2k4ever.
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Wtf is he doing?

Buying fish pebbles or something?

He probably was going to buy blue ones until Fujiyama pointed it out to him.

Of course we don't have proof but I definitely wouldn't put it past him to scam people like that.
 
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King Kiwi said:
But seriously, is no one concerned about the welfare of their potential dog?

We know he's already killed one cat and he neglected the beagles. When poor little Sorbet was seeking refuge under a car, Chris helpfully sprayed the little fellow with a hose to get him out.

There was the time that he screamed at the dogs to shut up and did something off screen and made them whimper and go quiet.

Yeah, Chris doesn't need pets. He needs a padded cell
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He needs a fucking beating but yeah

Not trying to be a ween it's just that lolcows who torture or abuse animals enrage me a lot...maybe, just maybe, he will not take care of him, just toss responsibility to other person, unfortunately for some reason, Chris pets have the worst of luck, for example, when that schizo Daniel Larson get a dog, some trolls rescued the dog in less than 5 days, that was awesome, but unfortunately, any of the Chandler pets had any luck, their deaths where depressing, in the best of cases....so, wishful thinking, someone else is taking care of the dog and chris chan just stays with his shit face and his ton of meds and it's not responsible of the dog
 
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themarchivist2 said:
The Flutter photo without the watermark, from Reddit
View attachment 6985548
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This has gotta be the most normal outfit Chris has worn in years, sans the custom Sonichu shoes. Even his hair looks better, relatively speaking.

I mean he still doesn't exactly look like a normal person, but now he looks more like a dude you'd see at a gas station at 1 am as opposed to someone who exclusively wears women's clothes fished out of a Salvation Army dumpster.
 
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CFC-12 said:
This has gotta be the most normal outfit Chris has worn in years, sans the custom Sonichu shoes. Even his hair looks better, relatively speaking.

I mean he still doesn't exactly look like a normal person, but now he looks more like a dude you'd see at a gas station at 1 am as opposed to someone who exclusively wears women's clothes fished out of a Salvation Army dumpster.
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ironically, this whole look could be saved by the goatee
instantly go from 'unwashed bum' to 'cool unwashed artist'

maybe this is it.. maybe the finale of his transformation will be its return!
 
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