- Joined
- Jul 4, 2022
Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud
- Thread starter BILLY MAYS
- Start date
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
Then... who was photographer?
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2020
Satan, from the looks of it.
I'm wondering if she's scrambling to find a semi-professional photographer who can make her look human. She probably took some photos on her own and was stunned at how bad they looked.
She has lots of old boudoir photos she could theoretically use, but she'd almost certainly need permission from the original photographers to upload them to Onlyfans. Many photographers wouldn't want to be associated with the level off gross feeders her new porn profile would attract.
Photographers retain some rights to their photos when they're republished for commercial reasons. Onlyfans is a professional site and won't just blow off permissions. I wouldn't be surprised if Tess already tried to upload some and Onlyfans turned them back for photographer sign-off.
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2023
She’s only posted 14 things since her debut. So she’s too lazy to even regularly update her account. I think she assumed she’d make a bunch of money off of it and when that didn’t happen, she lost interest.
She has 1.1k likes and let’s just assume that every single one of those simps subscribed. That means $12,221/month. So even in the absolute best of scenarios, it’s still not enough to cover what she feels she deserves. Her OnlySimps career lasted as long as a Little Debbie’s snack cake in the Ryann Hoven household.
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Yah, but wouldn't they need to sign up for her OnlyHams to find out if their material was being used illegally?
A ten percent conversion rate of subscribers to paid users is a very good rate of engagement. So $1,222.10 is probably the best she can hope for. That's MAYBE half her rent on a crappy two bedroom apartment, at a best estimate of paid engagement.
When she didn't engage or keep up with content, she probably had a 50% loss of paid subscribers in her first month.
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2023
Yep, not even enough to cover her Little Debbie’s budget for the month. No wonder she’s not talking about it.
- Joined
- Nov 5, 2023
- Joined
- May 30, 2023
My first thought was cleavage, but considering the positioning of her arm, it's her back tits.
Tula - 2 years ago, Amazon sunrise lamp for lighting in the first image, mystery body part in the second
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2023
Thing is, Tubbers has made several forays into business, it’s just that they’ve all failed. Or were scams, like the Eff Your Beauty Standards t-shirts. She’s created two failed fashion lines, failed designs with other brands, and did such a shitty job with sponsorships that Flabletics dropped her and they rarely drop anybody. Tess is the perfect combination of stupid, lazy, narcissistic, and incompetent and that’s why she’s in the predicament she’s in currently.
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- Joined
- Jul 18, 2019
Ass fatter. They can see it from the ISS.
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2021
She is such a bitch. You can tell how much she's seething right there. Tess, your face in that video is also one color: red. You might need some blood pressure medication girlfriend. You know, because you're the size of a barn.
Also, if that shirt isn't at least a 5x then I'm the queen of England.
Also, if that shirt isn't at least a 5x then I'm the queen of England.
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2019
Well fuck. I was about to doubt her on makeup but she's got tattoos of brushes? That's it, she's never wrong about makeup because tattoos. And don't you forget it either!!
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2020
It's unreal that she would mock that woman's appearance while looking like that. LOOK AT HER HAIR. She literally looks like she's wearing a Party City Pippi Longstocking wig.
This bitch is 40 years old, a "Super Model", and she's wearing Wendy's mascot cosplay on her head. Why are her bangs flipping out like that??
Also, I dare her to address the Michelle McDaniel video. Michelle fucking killed her dead, and not just about her fatness either.
This bitch is 40 years old, a "Super Model", and she's wearing Wendy's mascot cosplay on her head. Why are her bangs flipping out like that??
Also, I dare her to address the Michelle McDaniel video. Michelle fucking killed her dead, and not just about her fatness either.
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
Tess' recent tags reveal secret Italy videos from @melissatatetx
And the reveal those photos from Tess' posts were taken by a professional photographer, which explains the disparity in quality between what we saw and what she makes on her own.
This Melissa chick seems pretty cool, actually, seems like she had a much better time on the trip than Tess, in part because - while she is overweight - you can see she's fit enough to be mobile.
Her post quality is also very high, and stays relevant to her brand:
This is probably more what Stella Vision expected from their influencers in exchange for the trip.
And the reveal those photos from Tess' posts were taken by a professional photographer, which explains the disparity in quality between what we saw and what she makes on her own.
This Melissa chick seems pretty cool, actually, seems like she had a much better time on the trip than Tess, in part because - while she is overweight - you can see she's fit enough to be mobile.
Her post quality is also very high, and stays relevant to her brand:
This is probably more what Stella Vision expected from their influencers in exchange for the trip.
While dressed as Sedusa from the Powerpuff Girls.
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2020
She also conspicuously avoided posting small group photos with Tess. Hmmm...
We see Tess in the first clip, but we're supposed to focus on the other fat gorl having fun in the innertube. After that, Tess only appears in the full, large group photos. Melissa takes a few fun photos posing with other individuals, but never Tess.
I suspect Tess pulled diva shit on the other fatties, and they all iced her out after a while. She thought she'd be the queen of that trip. But the other gorls noticed her snotty entitlement and excluded her whenever possible.
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2021
That's what wavy hair does when cut too short. I know she had straight hair as a child but hair texture can change, I had a friend who shaved his straight hair off and it grew back curly and a different friend who had straight hair a child, until she got a perm as a teen and had curly hair after that. My mother-in-law had curly hair until her pregnancies and then lost most of her curls, which is apparently pretty common. Another friend had long hair as a child, got a haircut, and now her hair won't grow past her shoulders. It's also possible she used a blow dryer as a child, or her mother did.
Hair is wierd.
Tess needs to blow dry her bangs with a round brush to make them look nice. Those flippy bangs have never been in style.
- Joined
- Sep 24, 2019
MEOW!
I haven’t heard an attempted call out like that since early high school.
Any time you have to go to pissy, personal attacks like that rather than a proper response, you’ve already lost.
I haven’t heard an attempted call out like that since early high school.
Any time you have to go to pissy, personal attacks like that rather than a proper response, you’ve already lost.
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
