According to John, he was so depressed before trooning out that he wanted to kill himself repeatedly. He likes to dramatize this by saying he can still taste the gun in his mouth. Once he got on the titty skittles, he claims that his mental illness went away and he became the stunning and brave successful woman he is today. If he doesn't keep getting his pills, he says he'll immediately want to suicide again.
So it's less "I'll die without estrogen," it's more "keep giving me what I want or I'll kill myself, I swear." The typical tranny suicide bait.
Yes he did, which really puts his claims of being mentally sound in doubt. Y'know, because that's something that a sane person would definitely do.