"ADF" / Philip Vincent Haskins-Delici / Isabel Rosa Araujo - The Original Troon Commie Cow

[Plum Smuggler]

Bringing a pig to a mosque is about as haram

Speaking of haram, I can't believe Phil shared a film made by colonizing infidels and correct me if I'm wrong but aren't movies depicting Mohammad frowned upon?

 

[Cybertonia]

Bringing a pig to a mosque is about as haram as you can get. When they throw him off the roof, do we think he’ll splatter or bounce?

One time years ago, my friend hit a deer while he was driving at a glancing blow, and a laser-straight line of deer poop was sprayed straight down the side of his car out the deer's anus.

I'd imagine Phil's blubbery body would probably do the same thing due to hydrodynamic forces.

 

[DespotCTM]

One time years ago, my friend hit a deer while he was driving at a glancing blow, and a laser-straight line of deer poop was sprayed straight down the side of his car out the deer's anus.

I'd imagine Phil's blubbery body would probably do the same thing due to hydrodynamic forces.

You mean that there is a chance he'd shit a straight line in some pool if he bellyflopped too hard?!

 

[AnOminous]

I can only imagine the reaction to a fat little tattooed potato boy, bouncing and squeaking in the middle of a mosque and then he shits himself.

I hope he goes to an actual mosque and does some disgusting, haram troon shit and they chuck him off the top of the minaret.

Of course I'd feel sorry for the akbars who would have to clean his filth off the pavement and ritually cleanse the premises that have been defiled by pig flesh. Not even snackbars deserve that.

 

[The Taco Santo!]

You mean that there is a chance he'd shit a straight line in some pool if he bellyflopped too hard?!

I think there's a good chance he'd shit himself in a pool no matter what the circumstances. Not that anyone's ever going to invite him over for a swim. He may very well have never been in a pool in his entire life.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

As I said when this came up last time

He'd be ejected the moment he untied his boots.

Maybe if they tape his mouth shut and put him in a burkha? That won't do anything for the small, but not being able to see or hear him may be enough.

The big problem is going to be cleaning him first. Muslims are required to wash before prayer. I don't think mosques have inbuilt jet wash stations with wire brushes.

'The steps of wudu are washing the hands, rinsing the mouth and nose, washing the face, then the forearms, then wiping the head, the ears, then washing or wiping the feet, while doing them in order without any big breaks between them.'

The second problem is going to be the physicality of Muslim prayer. I'm not convinced he could get down on his knees and back up again without a forklift.

Obviously this is all redundant because it's a larp, but I would love to see it happen.

 

[Plum Smuggler]

The big problem is going to be cleaning him first. Muslims are required to wash before prayer. I don't think mosques have inbuilt jet wash stations with wire brushes.

I looked up the Arab version of a mitzvah and operation Kiwi scrub down would turn out to be Sevap for the Muslims of Portland.

 

[FireAddictedPsychopath]

Wasnt Philth a satanist though?

 

[Positron]

I just want to say I sincerely hope he goes through a Muslim phase now. I can only imagine the reaction to a fat little tattooed potato boy,

He is already as haram as ham.

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

He is already as haram as ham.
View attachment 7048166

If that’s haram, what are they going to make of his apparent mangina?

I wonder what his Japanese Nazi Jewish imaginary friend makes of all of this. And Jingles.

 

[The Taco Santo!]

Jingles was strangled by one of his other personalities, but Phil has demanded strict accountability from his system, so consequences will be severe.

 

[Alex Krycek]

He is already as haram as ham.
View attachment 7048166

It does depend on the Madhab.

Some Muslims in Tribal areas get tattoos as markers for their tribal area. Generally it’s just a small one on the wrist. This is also practiced by Christians in the Middle East and the Maghreb in some areas.

But I think every religion would agree getting “Yeast Infection” tattooed on your body in Spanish is forbidden. Whether you intended it to say that or not.

 

[I raped a dog 2day]

When is the spuds next court date?

 

[a hapless toad]

I don't know the mother's age at the time of the Tater Tard's birth, but if it was highly advanced, she gambled and lost there too. Remember that the Snorlax birthed Chris in, what, her mid-forties? That's almost a fifty-fifty shot at producing a highly defective baby.

His mother was 33ish and Angelo was 42ish.

Advanced paternal age causes issues as much as maternal age, especially when it comes to autism. Borb was 41 when Chris was born, but Robert was 55.

 

[Disgruntled Pupper]

Advanced paternal age causes issues as much as maternal age, especially when it comes to autism. Borb was 41 when Chris was born, but Robert was 55.

This is correct. Autism actualy has a stronger link to paternal age. Now, if Chris and Phil had chromosomal issues you could lay it at their mother's feet, but their autism was really their dad's dusty sperm fault.

Anyways, I forgot about Phil, but it turns out I didn't have to worry because he's boring again.

 

[Thumb Butler]

Jingles was strangled by one of his other personalities, but Phil has demanded strict accountability from his system, so consequences will be severe.

Jingles was too pure and had to die. It didn't have to be that way.

 

[AnOminous]

Advanced paternal age causes issues as much as maternal age, especially when it comes to autism. Borb was 41 when Chris was born, but Robert was 55.

Women are born with all the eggs they'll ever have, so when a 40+ year old woman gets pregnant, the fertilized egg is literally as old as the woman (probably older because the eggs were produced before she was even born). Men have bad sperm because the new cells that are produced are worse quality, a trend that continues even though male fertility can theoretically last as long as a man can live.

Anyway your odds skyrocket of getting one or more tard gametes involved in a "geriatric" pregnancy (they literally call it that even over the age of 35).

 

[Lord Of Shit]

This is correct. Autism actualy has a stronger link to paternal age. Now, if Chris and Phil had chromosomal issues you could lay it at their mother's feet, but their autism was really their dad's dusty sperm fault.

Anyways, I forgot about Phil, but it turns out I didn't have to worry because he's boring again.

Absolutely true.

Dudes, please, your sperm have a best-before date, too.

Do you want Chris-chans?
'Cause this is how you get Chris-chans.

 

[Plum Smuggler]

When is the spuds next court date?

He’s got a trial readiness hearing on the 14th.

 

[Sonichu-choo trainwreck]

He’s got a trial readiness hearing on the 14th.

He should tugboat a tennis ball launcher that he can load with potatoes and do some beatsabre training for his upcoming battles in the name of the almighty one