🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Sam Losco's Wife]

He was dropping hints about ‘this woman I’ve been talking to’ like he does whenever some female is polite to him because he’s that desperate.

He hasn't had any pussy since the horse left him, not even any of the Pantsuella hooker pussy. He's barren.

Edit: I forgot about getting 2nd hand nigger AIDS from Grandma Vickers. It explains why he was so desperate.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

This was actually kino as fuck. I didn’t think he still had it in him, I wonder if he’s drunk.

lol no it wasn't. It was yet another super forced, super contrived "Ralph very poorly imitates a WWE promo for some forgettable drama" video. He's done a dozen of these before. The anger never feels real because it isn't. He's essentially just doing a bit that he's not committed to. We know what actually angry Ralph looks and sounds like and his "promo" videos never match it.

 

[BigPeanut]

lol no it wasn't. It was yet another super forced, super contrived "Ralph very poorly imitates a WWE promo for some forgettable drama" video. He's done a dozen of these before. The anger never feels real because it isn't. He's essentially just doing a bit that he's not committed to. We know what actually angry Ralph looks and sounds like and his "promo" videos never match it.

The first half I felt that, but the second half it felt pretty realistic and kino IMO.

 

[AltisticRight]

He's probably doing this to get Harooooooooo's attention.
What a sad existence of a piggy.

I wonder if he’s drunk.

If?

 

[BigPeanut]

He's probably doing this to get Harooooooooo's attention.
What a sad existence of a piggy.


If?

I’ve been waiting for the king to drink for so long. On Xannies, which he’s been on since the whole mexico saga, has been gay as FUCK. I need my king to get drunk and destroy his enemies. I’m feeling like we might be back

 

[Oliver Onions]

View attachment 7117615

lmao I guessed it would be 10 real dollars but it's only 5. Broke bitch Ralph can't even paypig like a real man. Sad!

He hasn't had any pussy since the horse left him, not even any of the Pantsuella hooker pussy. He's barren.

I apologise for placing these thoughts in everyone's mind but I'd be surprised if his dick even works any more after a solid decade of substance abuse destroying his body.

It would be the height of irony if the Memphis Micro was out of commission after all the years he's spent speculating about Null's dingle dongus.

 

[Braphamut]

lol no it wasn't. It was yet another super forced, super contrived "Ralph very poorly imitates a WWE promo for some forgettable drama" video. He's done a dozen of these before. The anger never feels real because it isn't. He's essentially just doing a bit that he's not committed to. We know what actually angry Ralph looks and sounds like and his "promo" videos never match it.

Agreed. Angry Ralph turns colors and puts himself in legal jeopardy. What the fuck is this caterwauling? A sour ass bitch with sundown syndrome.

 

[Click reply to view]

I don't think backpage escorts care if someone just got out of rehab.

Counterpoint, junkies don't have a lot of money, have a large capacity for violence, and shit, what if they od or have some kind of conniption? Nobody wants a "Dead Junkie Storage" sign outside their place, it's bad for business.

 

[Sam Losco's Wife]

I apologise for placing these thoughts in everyone's mind but I'd be surprised if his dick even works any more after a solid decade of substance abuse destroying his body.

Is Ozemp-dick a thing?

 

[Oliver Onions]

Is Ozemp-dick a thing?

According to Bing there's no direct evidence, but it's not unheard of

 

[Die For Me!]

Ralph very poorly imitates a WWE promo

Ralph has become obsessed with John Cenas latest turn on Cody Rhodes, and after witnessing John Cena stepping up to his fans bullying/memes, Ralph too has been fueled with a lot of hatred, which he is pointing all of it towards women:

Spoiler: John Cenas blade-fabe

Ralph tried his best to wear a red shirt but they were all too stinky and stained with cum so he had to go with orange. As for the hat, it's Ralphs "subliminal messaging" as he attempts to be a grim reaper of sorts against the evil state of New York City and its Stables.
So now finally the only question remains is why exactly Ralph is channeling all his hate lately towards women. Well, here's my ongoing theories (outside of his battle with May):

• Ralph is ass blasted for once again being outed as a gigantic mark for Women as he has received AIDS from his sons grandma in attempts to be a WWE superstar that revives the entire sektur (it failed).
• Ralph is upset that his elderly uber driver Merrie Jayne is no longer donating to a person who has had sex with another elderly woman with AIDS before her after donating well over 10k dollars throughout her 2 odd years of support. Also may or may not be going scorched earth behind the scenes as well:

link / archive
and when I do say all his anger i really do mean all his anger:

"the rest of you whores are nothing, You're nothing! YOU NEVER WERE ANYTHING, THAT'S WHY YOU'VE BEEN TREATED LIKE SECOND CLASS FUCKING CITIZENS THE WHOLE GOD DAMN HISTORY OF THE FUCKING WORLD! IT WASN'T A FUCKING MISTAKE! IT WASN'T SOME ACCIDENT OF EVOLUTION-- IT'S THE WAY IT SHOULD'VE BEEN DONE!!! AND THERE'S A REALLY GOOD MOTHER FUCKING REASON FOR IT: BECAUSE YOU'RE STUPID AS SHIT! AND YOU CAN'T STOP GETTING RAPED, that's the other reason!"

if you want to know the truth about it, I think it's not any single one of these theories but actually all of these theories put together that has Ralph literally foaming at the mouth hollering into an empty, black void that is about to swallow him whole.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

lol no it wasn't. It was yet another super forced, super contrived "Ralph very poorly imitates a WWE promo for some forgettable drama" video. He's done a dozen of these before. The anger never feels real because it isn't. He's essentially just doing a bit that he's not committed to. We know what actually angry Ralph looks and sounds like and his "promo" videos never match it.

I do like even in his failed WWF angry rant mode, he still managed to whinge about May leaving him.

Dirtbags who no one respects always whine about loyalty the most. They should get a dog. People who have loyal friends and colleagues never demand or ask for loyalty, it was what they earned by the way they behaved (and by not associating with dirtbags). Gunt is a dirtbag surrounded by dirtbags, he’s never known loyalty because he’s never earned it nor has he ever been loyal to anyone, ever. He announces he’s only loyal to himself as if that’s a not always been the case. Ralph lived off of his mom till 34, told her to walk to dialysis, and when her health really declined and she needed his help the most, he promptly got May to rent a house so he could flee.*

Ironically Ralph’s not even loyal to himself, he’s a whore. (The chorus of that song should be the required intro music for 90% of all streaming content)

*

Spoiler

I’ve always thought May won the pig prize because was able to rent a house for him, whereas Faith was a pregnant teen with no credit or resources. She had to live in Gunt’s “wing” of Sandra’s house. He could extract resources from May, but not Faith. May eventually realized this too. She fled Mexico three months after the Daddy Harry subsidies and CC were cut off. Three months of actual financial dependence on Gunt made her finally wake up, grab baby and run. This guy still moans about May being “disloyal” because she didn’t want to be his slave in Mexico and raise her daughter in third world squalor .

 

[Pigtoad]

I thought Ralph was supposed to do Smark Guys with Phil and Mersh? Now that he's bait and switched Mersh to little more than a guest, he's gassing him up and glazing.

 

[Die For Me!]

Ralph is playing a numbers game again with his gay-logs retorts:

link / archive
Which is interesting, especially when Ralph touts his huge number of followers, yet somehow manages to receive infinitely less engagement than his enemies who have far less followers:

And as pointed out in the above image, if Ralph didn't care about numbers, then why would he pay a premium for a second account that he uses to fluff the numbers of every post he makes on his main account? It's because he's a closeted granny tranny clout whore who's desperate to get out of single digit engagement.

Ralphs new home that he is quickly becoming unwelcome in has been elevated to heaven status if you want to know the truth about it:

link / archive
Ralphs new gimp/janny Teddy Feaser is hard at work on the latest Kino Casino scandal. Also wants you to think he knows what a career ending scandal is despite unknowingly blowing his brains out 5 times over with 12-gauge career enders:

link / archive

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

then why would he pay a premium for a second account that he uses to fluff the numbers of every post he makes on his main account?

Because pantsu deleted her account so he cannot pretend to be his loving live-in mommy maid perpetual fiancé.

 

[30+GameOvers]

Ralphs new gimp/janny Teddy Feaser is hard at work on the latest Kino Casino scandal. Also wants you to think he knows what a career ending scandal is despite unknowingly blowing his brains out 5 times over with 12-gauge career enders:

These two truly deserve each other
Imagine being such a washed up old piggy gunt that even someone like Eso Shaggy or Gaytor doesn't want to sweep up after you, lmfao

 

[AncientPhosphur]

Because pantsu deleted her account so he cannot pretend to be his loving live-in mommy maid perpetual fiancé.

Wrong they did get married. In Vegas. By Elvis. He was very fat. (Cozy Roxy was left unattended in a corner during the ceremony)

 

[JustStopDude]

I mean Mexico probably does have wrestling museums, but it’d be for lucha libre type wrestling that Ralph has no interest in nor would he be able to understand since gringo Ralph can’t even speak the language of the country he lives in. Sad!

I kind of wish that Ralph got into Luchador wrestling. Imagine if he could get his start as an evil manager. Like a Senor Trump leading the evil guys and shouting out obscenities at the good guys and the crowd in English.

This could be the start of his journey to the WWE!

 

[Thorndyke Special]

Ralph really is following in the footsteps of Tonkasaw. After bailing out of (several) fights he instigated, he's going to start a wrestling show. Wow! I'm sure this will bring in the cash.

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Ralph really is following in the footsteps of Tonkasaw. After bailing out of (several) fights he instigated, he's going to start a wrestling show. Wow! I'm sure this will bring in the cash.

But will the Ralphamale pre-record it like a BISH? That's the important question.