Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[pink cigarettes]

Yup.

I’ve seen plenty of homos do homo stuff.

But none of them do this very fembrained activity of dressing sexy to get attention from men.

(When a faggot dresses sexy, he does it to get his dick sucked. None of them go out like this just be seen in public.)

This kind of “UwU! Look at my fit and my cute, short skirt!” is only done by pooners LARPing as gay men very poorly.

Honestly I think they're dressing mostly to show off to one another as well, the way many young women do. Nobody but pooners (and pooner anthropologists) are going to know wtf any of these dumbass niche post-post-post-punk/"queer" (straight female academic)/too much internet poor fashion choices even mean

ETA: ninja'd by @Anasa Tristis on the "dressing for one another" front

 

[Lord Of Shit]

They've actually harvested a penis from a cadaver and reattached it to another man successfully. Who knows how much longer until this available for pooners.

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/articles/2018/04/first-ever-penis-and-scrotum-transplant-makes-history-at-johns-hopkins

JESUS AND HIS BOYS, that isn't good.

From now on, men going to be waking in bathtubs full of ice, missing not a kidney, but their dick and balls.

And the whole place will smell oddly of tuna.

 

[TismFarmer]

how do you explain my facial hair? Women don't usually have a single facial hair and I have about 40.

40 facial hairs and size 4 shoes!
If you're not a Pooner, you're 12 years old and you need to fuck off for at least 8 years.

@Larry David's Opera Cape

The first thing I thought when I saw Sophie/Sasha was: "that's a piggy FAS Face!"
Tiny eyes, upturned nose with flattened bridge, smooth philtrum, and thin upper lip.
Not to mention the obvious mental retardation going on here!!
I, too, wondered how much Mama liked the bottle...

 

[Twix Eatr]

View attachment 7128332


40 facial hairs and size 4 shoes!
If you're not a Pooner, you're 12 years old and you need to fuck off for at least 8 years.

40 was just a rough count, dude. There's probably over 200, I bet. Maybe even 250. How many do you have? Probably none, I'm guessing. That's a size 4 in UK. I'm fixing to deliver an AMERICAN ass-kicking. Besides, who cares? It ain't the size of the shoe, but the fury of the foot inside it. You think someone who voluntarily puts gauges in their ears would back down? Guess again, friend-o.

 

[Drive-by Farts]

Admittedly, I'm not exactly comfortable Googling weirdo manga gay hentai porn. But I don't want to keep asking you shit I can Google myself. I do thank you for the backstory on this. It is helpful. Is this topic safe where I won't run into sexualized depictions of kids or something?

You can go on Webtoon, then go to the “Canvas” section and click romance. Anything you see that has “BL” on the thumbnail is Boys Love. Almost half the Canvas romance seems to be BL. BL could be anything from fluff to hardcore, but Webtoon doesn’t allow porn, so you’ll be fine, you’re not going to find anything too shocking. If you poke around, you’ll start to see why some of these women might initially think that if they just got rid of their boobs, they might be a lil’ cutie patootie uke boy.

I might’ve mentioned this already, but mid 2010s when that “Own Voices” movement happened, lots of straight western female creators were attacked/harassed and pushed out of creating BL. Keep in mind - it has ALWAYS been a for-women by-women genre. A lot of creators pooned out or suddenly discovered they were bi due to social pressure around that time. It was weird to witness!

Does anyone know if the rates of poonin’ out have decreased in the US? Seems like a lot of these stories are “I pooned out in 2016”… did we peak yet?

 

[TismFarmer]

This website is something else
View attachment 7112437
View attachment 7112441

Spoiler: Powerlevel

I clicked on this website, and was looking around, getting more and more horrified, when Slightly Older Teen says "What are you looking at? You look like you're about to cry, or throw up, or punch somebody..."
Slightly Younger Teen says "actually, you look like you're going to throw up  while you're crying and punching somebody..."
When I declined to show them what I was looking at, Older says to younger "Yurk! That means Stinkditch!"
Then they both said at the same time: "Water snake Rotdog!!"

I'm so proud...

Thread tax.
Little Pooner decides that Atrophy is probably not really a big deal...
I guess she's not a fan of Buck Angel...

 

[Paper Machete]

Again, the lack of bodily integrity is harrowing.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

Spoiler: Powerlevel

I clicked on this website, and was looking around, getting more and more horrified, when Slightly Older Teen says "What are you looking at? You look like you're about to cry, or throw up, or punch somebody..."
Slightly Younger Teen says "actually, you look like you're going to throw up  while you're crying and punching somebody..."
When I declined to show them what I was looking at, Older says to younger "Yurk! That means Stinkditch!"
Then they both said at the same time: "Water snake Rotdog!!"

I'm so proud...

Thread tax.
Little Pooner decides that Atrophy is probably not really a big deal...
I guess she's not a fan of Buck Angel...

View attachment 7129672

Again, the lack of bodily integrity is harrowing.

“I don’t want to use an estrogen cream because it will aggravate my gender dysphoria!”

If the atrophy is to the point of her bleeding heavily enough that she thought she had a severe UTI (versus a minor tear from vaginal dryness), then a cream isn’t going to do jack squat anyway. But damn, that’s some lack of self preservation. This is what prioritizing feelings over treating mental illness does to a motherfucker.

 

[shatterspinel]

*She’s smooth down there.
*Has menstrual problems unrelated to the bulimia.
*She likes age regression BUT DONT YOU DARE CONTACT HER AND BE CREEPY!

A 13 year old 6th grader into age play is probably the most sad thing I have seen here, being a tranny on top of that with a severe eating disorder… like any of these individually indicates sexual abuse. I really hate that we don’t live in a world where there’s some type of I don’t know, service geared towards protecting children. I am actually mad at the internet right now.

 

[Surfin Terf]

Men don’t stay away from them because they’re terrified of engaging in a gendered activity.

Men don’t get manicures and pedicures because the vast majority have little interest in sitting and having some Vietnamese lady fuck with your nails for an hour.

My grandfather would get manicures. He didn't work with his hands, but no one would call him a sissy. He was an old school, man's man who fought in WWII, would order a second steak for dessert, was interviewed by Rolling Stone, drank himself to death, and had impeccable fingernails. And I'm 100% sure that at no point did anyone wonder if he was actually a man.

A 13 year old 6th grader into age play is probably the most sad thing I have seen here, being a tranny on top of that with a severe eating disorder… like any of these individually indicates sexual abuse. I really hate that we don’t live in a world where there’s some type of I don’t know, service geared towards protecting children. I am actually mad at the internet right now.

If she's not currently being groomed by a pedophile, she will be targeted by pedos soon.

 

[Dr Bathroom]

And I'm 100% sure that at no point did anyone wonder if he was actually a man.

Gay men are still men.

 

[Bloo]

Spoiler: Powerlevel

I clicked on this website, and was looking around, getting more and more horrified, when Slightly Older Teen says "What are you looking at? You look like you're about to cry, or throw up, or punch somebody..."
Slightly Younger Teen says "actually, you look like you're going to throw up  while you're crying and punching somebody..."
When I declined to show them what I was looking at, Older says to younger "Yurk! That means Stinkditch!"
Then they both said at the same time: "Water snake Rotdog!!"

I'm so proud...

Thread tax.
Little Pooner decides that Atrophy is probably not really a big deal...
I guess she's not a fan of Buck Angel...

View attachment 7129672

Didn’t Buck nearly die of sepsis because of this? Surely the bleeding and cramping would give them more dysphoria than using some oestrogen gel.

 

[Anasa Tristis]

Little Pooner decides that Atrophy is probably not really a big deal...

Anytime any blood other than menses is detected, especially daily, a trip to the gyno squeezer is highly recommended. Uterine cancer doesn't give a shit about your gender dysphoria.

But if just the thought of a pelvic exam and/or dealing with E cream makes her upset, I can only imagine what meeting a vaginal ultrasound wand would do.

 

[shatterspinel]

But if just the thought of a pelvic exam and/or dealing with E cream makes her upset, I can only imagine what meeting a vaginal ultrasound wand would do.

That’s another thing that confuses me, they seem to be in denial of being female. Compared to a troon who is actively looking at their male hood, there’s no room for magical thinking unless you’re into Chris chan levels of delusion.

 

[Hamplanet Fitness]

Lil dood calls gay men "GRIDS" and "subhuman" for rejecting her sisters:


The pooner:


Edit: She's still going

 

[and I must scream]

I know I encountered this pooner before, but don't remember if she was posted on the farms or it just one of the many pooner whose videos I have watched when I actually tried to "listen to trans people". I searched the name on the farms but found nothing.

Anyway, this pooner transitioned for literally no reason other than that she thinks her more true and authentic self is that of a man. Her friend came out as trans men which probably contributed to the situation. Started to experiment with "masc" haircut and cloths and liked it so she moved forward with this. Says she was "masc" as a girl (so basically a regular kid, tomboy at most), but when puberty came, decided to present more feminine to please others, she "just wanted to be loved".

Her parents are normal her childhood was normal they didn't force any gender serotypes or expectations on her, she literally grow up as a normal girl. Actually was excited about her puberty and liked the changes it caused. Was happy as a woman and didn't have a problem with her female body at all, but felt being a man is more aligned with her true self so she transitioned. Takes testosterone and had "top surgery". After transitioning started to miss girly things, so decided trans men can be girly as well. Has self doubts to this day. She calls it "Trans impostor syndrome". Has watched many videos of and by trans people in order to convince herself she is a trans man.

This girl has transitioned because of social contagion and FOMO, nothing else. One of the most pointless transitions of a pooner I've ever seen.

Her youtube's account name is Eliah Reber. Tiktok is eliah_ftm.

She looks like a nice person and is not malicious so I feel bad, but why oh why the hell has she done this to herself. She is still young so she is fine now, but wait until she gets to mid 30's or 40's and it will finally dawn on her that this is all complete bullshit and she has done this for nothing at all. And now she is a 40 years old woman who already had menopause in her 20's, has health issues from being hormonally unbalanced for so many years, and lost all her 20's and 30's on trying to larp as a man.


This annoying woman is a white young woman brainwashed woke libshit who transitioned because she was told white people are evil oppressors just for being white, and she didn't want to be evil oppressor so she decided she is trans and now she is a victim. I know many of them are, but this one is brainwashed to the max. Talks about white supremacy and cis supremacy, and complains that allies don't center trans people enough. She studies "whiteness". Yes, she really calls it that, it's in her channel description, and she has a video about this too and even have a whole playlist about it. Cries about how people get Americanized and Westernized when they become Americans. Because cultural assimilation is a new phenomenon apparently. She is originally Finnish (or her parents/ancestors were Finish, whatever), so I personally suggest she takes herself back there, live as an authentic Finish there and revive her ancestors' lost traditions.

Chopped her tits, because of course. On testosterone. Last video she posted on YouTube was a year ago, last activity on X and Instagram pretty much the same. She pisses me off.

Her youtube's account name is Salander Says, same as X/Twitter and Instagram.


I'm not posting videos because I know it will take me forever now and I need to get off the internet now, my apologies.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

BULIMIC POONER CRUSHED BY FIVE FOOT OF FACTS
View attachment 7127391
Another very stable and very sane little dood. Her entire subreddit seems to be dedicated to over sharing.

Wait wait wait wtf, she's 13 and digs kink (age regression)?!

Kill the internet. All of it. I don't care; we can all go back to writing paper checks and learning how to count change and going to the library to learn stuff.

Within two minutes of checking her profile, I found out that:

*She’s smooth down there.

*Has menstrual problems unrelated to the bulimia.
*She likes age regression BUT DONT YOU DARE CONTACT HER AND BE CREEPY!

Dude, we did not need to know any of that, and I hope you are furiously working to scrub it from your own mind.

 

[Fapcop]

Lil dood calls gay men "GRIDS" and "subhuman" for rejecting her sisters:

View attachment 7131592
The pooner:
View attachment 7131591

Edit: She's still going
View attachment 7131817
View attachment 7131818

LIL POONER, STOP MAKING ME LIKE YOU!!

Anyways… Is there anything more pathetic than pooners?

The most mundane stuff can leave them shellshocked and unable how to proceed without asking other lil doods for assistance.

Such as buying male cologne.


Lil dood seems unaware that they have entire departments in stores with masculine perfumes. Usually with testers. Or you can ask the staff for a sample.

But nah, let’s ask some other women who are too timid to ask for help in the store how to proceed!

BATHROOMS: THE FINAL POONER BOSS!

These wacky chicks spend hours going over imaginary bathroom scenarios in their heads. “I GOTTA TAKE A SHIT!! Yeah, that’s what a man would say, right fellow men?!”


“GOTTA LOOK GRUMPY! That’s how they know you’re a man like them you know!”

And yes, we actually get a lil bathroom dood over sharing in the usual feminine way: “You take it fellow man! I need to take a shit you see!”

The funniest part is that all their overthinking and stall-planning is for naught. Nobody looks at you funny because you don’t look grumpy lil’ pooner! They look at you weird because you’re a woman in a men’s bathroom!

 

[toilet_rainbow]

Pooner self portrait

 

[huesofmercury]