The NFL Thread

[Johnathan Readit]

View attachment 7284003
And as the biological drive of European Exploration drove his ancestors to endeavor to set foot in parts unknonwn, so to does the North American Hog Mollie (Porcinus Americanus) seek new pastures with fresh soil to till, set pockets, and make pancake blocks among. This exceptional specimen has decided to brave the cold unforgiving north of Detroit in search of glory. Far from his southern whelping grounds. Does he have the grit and toughness to become the next great Detroit Lions Offensive linemane? Only time will tell...

Deep in my heart I know their main reason for drafting him is that his neck is bigger than Dan Campbell's. You can hang a tire swing off that thing and have 3 fat kids jump on it.

 

[Americunt]

I've got no idea why ESPN has kept him around other than name recognition, and it's not like it's positive. He's not a reporter.

You know his origin story is just being a really autistic and annoying guy that would pester GMs about who they should draft? He literally has no experience playing, coaching, or even commentating football. He was just a dork that watched a lot of college ball and send out unsolicited advice to teams front offices so much that when ESPN got the rights to televise the draft they pushed him as THE draft guy.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

I know no one has taken Mel Kiper seriously in decades, if ever, but Shedeur falling to the 5th round really highlights the absurdity. I've got no idea why ESPN has kept him around other than name recognition, and it's not like it's positive. He's not a reporter. He sucks as a draft analyst. He doesn't scout players. He has no football experience outside of making mock drafts. Plus, I just found out he got into all this because he's Jewish and some other Jew told him there's going to be a market for draft information. (Jesus Christ.) He brings nothing to the table other than mock drafts and there's a zillion other people who do that better than him.

Have you seen who ESPN puts on their network? ESPN moved on from showing sports and having good commentary about the events happening to replace them with loud, retarded, talking heads that will create controversy because instagram and youtube comments are better than making an actual product

 

[Americunt]

Tree is a retarded shitlib, every chance he gets to in one of his vids he whines about how not heckin' wholesome the racismos are.

Literally everyone in "sportstube" other than Perna is, and that's really just because he knows to keep it in his pants and keep it entertaining rather than moralize. I remember some co-stream him and Grossi did awhile ago, where he was trying to get people to retweet something to get Jon Gruden's attention because he wanted to collab with him, and Tom was soying out about the emails and him being racist.

Then again Grossi was soying out about how uncomfortable their new kicker being an accused rapist was making him, until he gave them a walk-off field goal one game, and he never brought it up again lol.

 

[HackerX]

You know his origin story is just being a really autistic and annoying guy that would pester GMs about who they should draft? He literally has no experience playing, coaching, or even commentating football. He was just a dork that watched a lot of college ball and send out unsolicited advice to teams front offices so much that when ESPN got the rights to televise the draft they pushed him as THE draft guy.

That makes sense. I just have no idea how he's still THE draft guy at ESPN. Especially ever since the NFL draft began turning into the event it is now, 20+ years ago. Kiper's time of being the only fish in the pond ended well before even then, and it's not like he brings anything to the table other than having done it forever (poorly). He doesn't add any additional insight whatsoever and I'd trust most of the Xitter breaking news jews analysis over whatever Kiper is blabbing about. (Except Shultz. He was having a meltdown in Xitter over Shedeur which begs the question... What does Deion have on these people????)

What I'm trying to get at is there are dozens and dozens of people already in media who do what Kiper does, but infinitely better, much less the amount of giga-autists on the Internet. I acknowledge the belief that ESPN thinks people associate the NFL draft with Kiper since he's been covering it for eons, but I'm pretty sure (aka hope) that people associate Kiper with being a retard more than the draft. Shit, I remember people clowning on him on a football forum I was on in the early 2000s.

----Fun sidenote, this was when my hatred of ESPN and especially Chris Berman began. I fucking HATED how he'd pretentiously imply who the picks were moments before the pick was announced. I wanted the announcement to let me know who was being picked, not some smug kike who'd say "well let's see if this team will draft X position or Y player" right before a team drafts X position or Y player. This was well before the draft was available on multiple outlets or picks were leaked on Xitter.----

There's no way he's worth the pay check and I hope he's not still doing all this out of passion. If that's the case, it just makes everything worse.

 

[Xavier Renegade Angel]

Heres hoping my falcons don't go 0-17 amd give the rams the no1 pick. But it wouldnt suprise me if that happens.

 

[HackerX]

Have you seen who ESPN puts on their network? ESPN moved on from showing sports and having good commentary about the events happening to replace them with loud, retarded, talking heads that will create controversy because instagram and youtube comments are better than making an actual product

Eh, you're right. I'm treating ESPN like an idealized, serious sports media and not whatever the fuck it is now. The only thing they produce that's relatively decent is The Pat McAfee show, and that's due to either AJ Hawk being cool or them laughing about Dan Orlovsky shitting himself on camera.

Then again Grossi was soying out about how uncomfortable their new kicker being an accused rapist was making him, until he gave them a walk-off field goal one game, and he never brought it up again lol.

What a fag. He's basically a /r/nfl Reddit thread. The circlejerk is a cycle unto itself.

- Allegations come out on player.
-"Player bad"
- Nothing happens and time passes.
- Player reenters spotlight.
- "wow how how could they do this??? Player bad!!!"
- Allegations get proven false
- "wow guys, maybe we shouldn't jump to conclusions immediately"
- Player bad and cycle begins anew.

The only things worse are events where nignog dindunuffins and he only did it because racism or any time there's a right-wing slant. Especially Trump related. I always get a trip out of seeing a thread locked with 50x more posts than any other thread in the same timeframe all because the title implies politics.

 

[Xev]

Have you seen who ESPN puts on their network? ESPN moved on from showing sports and having good commentary about the events happening to replace them with loud, retarded, talking heads that will create controversy because instagram and youtube comments are better than making an actual product

Espn has become the Crossfire equivalent in sports media.

 

[Nigger Respecter]

ESPN became that when I stopped watching it regularly 20 years ago. I can't imagine what it's like now. Has to be unbearable

 

[Random Internet Person]

mystery solved?

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

mystery solved?

View attachment 7285498

Shadeur Sanders being a whiny little bitch and hypocrite. I'm shocked, I say, shocked. Not that I support this kind of thing, but if he'd just shrugged his shoulders and said "good one, got me," I think that'd have gone a long way to making him appear less insufferable.

FWIW, I rewatched the Alamo Bowl and the Colorado v. Nebraska game highlights and ... putting aside my dislike of the guy, I still don't get what I'm supposed to see that shows his potential as an NFL QB. The best I can come up with is that he's a project with a butt load of bad habits he desperately needs to be coached out of, starting with his tendency to hold onto the ball too long. And I'm not sure he's willing to listen, in fact it seems like he kind of isn't. I didn't see anything to suggest he can pick up second choice receivers, that he can really throw well while scrambling, etc.

 

[Franz Joseph]

@Trombonista

Tom Grossi just announced the Packers 7th round pick.

Here is where Tom Grossi announced the Packers pick from.

 

[Trombonista]

Tom's upload of his pick announcement. You can hear Rich Eisen's voice. Tom's appearance on his show is what got me into Rich Eisen.

Also, this is hilarious:

This is how you bring politics into the NFL Draft.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

Also, this is hilarious:

This is how you bring politics into the NFL Draft.

Solid way to open up the draft tbh. I would imagine the team name would change depending on the venue, but when you are trying to make this thing into a spectacle when it could easily be done within the span of 2 hours, you gotta do stuff like this. God its so depressing to see the NFL just poop out hundreds of millions every year

 

[Potentially Criminal]

@Potentially Criminal with any hope Shadeur will be another Baker Mayfield and by that I mean Cleveland will squander a future franchise QB.

Regardless, Shadeur will be a future former franchise Brown’s QB.

Another joins the Black Parade

 

[HackerX]

mystery solved?

View attachment 7285498

It'd make sense if Sanders gave the phone number to every team instead of teams that interested top QB prospect. If this is how it happened, I doubt we'll hear anything more because the NFL will quietly reprimand those involved and put a stop to any additional investigation ASAP.

Also, this is hilarious:

This is how you bring politics into the NFL Draft.

This is one my favorites. Partially because A.J. Hawk was a Packer. Partially because the 2006 NFL draft was the first draft I was seriously deep into the draft process.

Ofc I wanted Mario Williams or D'Brickashaw Ferguson, but was pretty convinced they were never gonna fall to #5. Yeah, A.J. Hawk was never a dominant superstar, but he was an above average starter his entire career and it's not like a lot of the prospects picked after him panned out.

Solid way to open up the draft tbh. I would imagine the team name would change depending on the venue, but when you are trying to make this thing into a spectacle when it could easily be done within the span of 2 hours, you gotta do stuff like this. God its so depressing to see the NFL just poop out hundreds of millions every year

For all the criticisms of the NFL, the shield knows how to own, operate, and expand a business.

Another joins the Black Parade
View attachment 7285992

Imagine drafting Baker Mayfield; a QB who actually wants to be there and turn the franchise around. Proceedingly, the franchise appears to turn the corner by winning a playoff game on the road against a division rival, then fucking get rid of Baker Mayfield because he was playing with a busted shoulder. Next, because God knows why, trading the barn for a QB that hasn't played for more than a year, is coming off a major injury, has a zillion sexual-related lawsuits, and decide to give him an absurd, fully guaranteed contract.

The Browns are a mistake.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Ok this is way better than hearing these fuckers bitch about Shedeur being drafted in the 5th round

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

Another joins the Black Parade
View attachment 7285992

In another couple of years she's going to have to get her legs lengthened.

The Browns are a mistake.

The Browns and their consequences have been a disaster for the human race.

 

[HackerX]

The Browns and their consequences have been a disaster for the human race.

At the very least, the football race. They can't even hang their hats with the Lions at this point since they've seemingly fixed their program. Hell, their in-state rivals, the Bengals, manage to occasionally put a good product on the field even though their ownership pinches all the pennies.

You'd think a lot of the Cleveland's root issues would have, at the very least, deviated elsewhere after Haslem bought the team. Nope. Somehow everything got worse. I'm just gonna assume Haslem kept all the football operations staff and the only difference is he occasionally butts in and forces the GM or coach to make a terrible decision. Based on what I've heard, it's a foregone conclusion in football circles that Haslem was the reason the Browns drafted Shedeur. This clip of their reaction solidifies it:

Look at how excited they are. They look like they're really amped up over the value they just stole from every other team. After they fire the GM and HC next year, I'm sure the candidates will love knowing the owner will repeatedly make spontaneous executive decisions under the guise that it wasn't his decision.

 

[Drama Fan]

Then again Grossi was soying out about how uncomfortable their new kicker being an accused rapist was making him, until he gave them a walk-off field goal one game, and he never brought it up again lol.

After the recent Packers kicker trauma, McManus can do a little murder (as a treat) if he wants to.