Tabletop Roleplaying Games (D&D, Pathfinder, CoC, ETC.)

Teehee Maccaroni is going to be the death of me.
The next time my players bitch about my game being super difficult or filled with esoteric bullshit and a plot that's more schizophrenic than an actual schizophrenic, I'm going to show them this post and tell them about how I'm at least not doing autistic shit like this. I at least keep the verisimilitude and tone of the game intact. Really, this seems like something the players would want more than a GM
 
The next time my players bitch about my game being super difficult or filled with esoteric bullshit and a plot that's more schizophrenic than an actual schizophrenic, I'm going to show them this post and tell them about how I'm at least not doing autistic shit like this. I at least keep the verisimilitude and tone of the game intact. Really, this seems like something the players would want more than a GM
If Tolkien could put Tom Bombadil in Lord of the Rings, I see no problem with Teehee Macaroni in a tabletop D&D game.
 
The next time my players bitch about my game being super difficult or filled with esoteric bullshit and a plot that's more schizophrenic than an actual schizophrenic, I'm going to show them this post and tell them about how I'm at least not doing autistic shit like this. I at least keep the verisimilitude and tone of the game intact. Really, this seems like something the players would want more than a GM
Not everything has to be serious all the time. It's nice to have some down time or just a bit of character building after or before a big battle.
 
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Not everything has to be serious all the time.
I agree, and in fact I try to run my games as having a very distinct balance between the more tense grimdark segments and the lighthearted character interactions and roleplay sequences. In the camp I think that they're quite valuable but I also believe that something can only be taken as seriously as seriously as it takes itself. Something like Teehee Macaroni would absolutely take me out of a game and make me start to lose interest. Levity and lightheartedness are valuable, but when something pingpongs between being stupid le so randumb and being grimdark it's just bad writing. Especially when it's something as ridiculous as Tehee Macaroni. If I'm trying to take something seriously, I don't want a dickwaving gnome to show up out of nowhere and start being silly and retarded all over the place. Of course if the game's tone is very much in line with Teehee Macaroni then there's nothing wrong with it-- it's just not in the flavor of games I like to play or run.
 
I agree, and in fact I try to run my games as having a very distinct balance between the more tense grimdark segments and the lighthearted character interactions and roleplay sequences. In the camp I think that they're quite valuable but I also believe that something can only be taken as seriously as seriously as it takes itself. Something like Teehee Macaroni would absolutely take me out of a game and make me start to lose interest. Levity and lightheartedness are valuable, but when something pingpongs between being stupid le so randumb and being grimdark it's just bad writing. Especially when it's something as ridiculous as Tehee Macaroni. If I'm trying to take something seriously, I don't want a dickwaving gnome to show up out of nowhere and start being silly and retarded all over the place. Of course if the game's tone is very much in line with Teehee Macaroni then there's nothing wrong with it-- it's just not in the flavor of games I like to play or run.
Well really all you can do is communicate that to your players and ask them to tone down the lolsorandom acts or if it does not work out you can either end the campaign early or finish it and find other players. I can see how that would be annoying as I too have been told I take things a bit to seriously in TT/RP though like you I can find it disrespectful if someone is doing something stupid that is not fitting for the current setting or event.
 
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Well really all you can do is communicate that to your players and ask them to tone down the lolsorandom acts or if it does not work out you can either end the campaign early or finish it and find other players.
Oh my players are great, just extremely autistic and very videogame brained. In fact, just today I had a really interesting session today (which I can talk about more if there's interest in it) and they were all complimenting the dungeon and layout and seemed to have a great time, despite the fact they were getting their asses handed to them in the first fight. Despite not understanding it or what it's about, they love the campaign we're making and are very invested. I value them a lot, even if one or two of them acts like manchildren more often than not.
 
Of course if the game's tone is very much in line with Teehee Macaroni then there's nothing wrong with it-- it's just not in the flavor of games I like to play or run.
That's my take. I just don't find wacky randumb games very much fun to run. It doesn't need to be ultra grim dark serious all time and I enjoy making jokes with the players and table in-jokes, but that doesn't translate to the game world.

One of the bigger problems I have right now that I'm between campaigns is its a lot of pickup games I'm running - Because modern comedy isn't about being funny (that's offensive and ablist) its about 'references'. But at most two, maybe three of the table know each other, you don't have the ability to make references and have them land with the table.
So you have retards like Sea Life Themes Memeguy who aren't actually funny trying to use internet memes in place of actually developing comedy.
 
Really hate it when I get a good game and group going, then some retard acts up and slows the game very drastically. Doubly so when you clearly have other people that feel the same as you: wanting to keep playing.
The same retard grinded our game down to a halt. Everyone is clearly mad at him but is trying not to show it.
I'm the GM of the game. I even made art for some scenes and tokens. I'm not going to let them stay unused. So far, two players want to keep going and leave him behind. I should had seen the red flag on the retard because of him slowly not paying attention throughout the sessions and not talking to me that he doesn't want to play anymore, my games are too boring and he has a suggestion, he wants a down time from the constant action to roleplay with the party, or whatever else.
 
The same retard grinded our game down to a halt. Everyone is clearly mad at him but is trying not to show it.
The best thing to do in situations like this is to just sit down and talk with him 1:1. Figure out what the deal is and see if you two can't solve it. If you can't, or if either party is unwilling to, then ditch him and move on. I've had to do this in my own campaign before-- telling players straight up that they're unfit to play the game for whatever reason. In my own case it was mental problems but some people might just not like the system or style, setting, etc.
For me, my biggest pet peeve when I'm running games is just legitimately stupid players. The kind of people who don't pay attention to small details because they think they don't have to, then when they get punished for it, they act surprised. Just recently in my last session there was a scenario where the players were up against a pretty hefty horde of monsters. Let me set the scene;

>During a mini-arc, they all wrote up new characters. These characters are somewhat below the level of their other characters, and just yesterday they found out the setting of the mini-arc is going to be far far ahead of anything they've seen so far. They're underleveled and out of their depth.
>They're presented with a small maze at the beginning of the dungeon. A few paths that lead North, South, and West. The Western path leads to a room filled to the brim with brand new, potentially extremely dangerous monsters that they've never seen before.
>the Southern path shows a preview of a later segment of the dungeon, but nothing else
>Not a single one of them tries to take the Northern path
>They stare at the map for a short while and discuss between themselves where they should go. A prevailing opinion is "well the only way forward is through the room with the new monsters."
>(This is not true)
>When they begin to engage with the spider robots I make it clear that they are meant to be stealth-focused monsters. They have eyes that project a cone of red light that shows where they can see, they can only detect movement, and are otherwise non-hostile if they don't know you're there. They spend some time trying to detect and find the party before the real fight starts.
>Not a single one of them tries to take the Northern path, which lets them loop around these monsters. They're there to act as a narrative example of the "tone" of this dungeon-- tense and stealth-focused, with unknown and dangerous monsters that can be more easily evaded and avoided than fought.
>They all decide to fight with them, investing several SEVERAL valuable resources to do so. They waste bombs, spellcasting materials, one of them loses their weapon, they lose a shitload of HP, etc.
>This particular monster has an ability that lets them roll dice to determine if they summon more monsters for the encounter. They succeed these rolls almost every time, much to everybody's chagrin. The room and surrounding hallways are crowded to the brim with something like 17 monsters, in a game where 5 can be pretty dangerous.
>When they decide to run away, THEN they go to the Northern path
>They discover that the Northern path leads them to a completely new area that will eventually let them bypass that room filled with monsters entirely
>The whole time they seem surprised and almost shocked that the encounter is going badly and that there's so many monsters, without realizing that both of those things were only the case because of their lack of tactical competency.
>The entire campaign has been marred by stuff like this


Even after mentioning to them multiple times that they "don't need to fight the enemies" and "they still haven't checked the Northern path yet", they still chose to fight the monsters then were surprised when it nearly killed them. Really, I don't think they're going to get the message until it DOES kill them. My players aren't as retarded as many, but something tells me they aren't really cut out for what my game is trying to go for. They still enjoy it, but they're not getting the best experience they can because they just don't pay attention or think very critically.
 
Even after mentioning to them multiple times that they "don't need to fight the enemies" and "they still haven't checked the Northern path yet", they still chose to fight the monsters then were surprised when it nearly killed them. Really, I don't think they're going to get the message until it DOES kill them. My players aren't as retarded as many, but something tells me they aren't really cut out for what my game is trying to go for. They still enjoy it, but they're not getting the best experience they can because they just don't pay attention or think very critically.
I think that sometimes players get trapped in the mindset of assuming that a tabletop game plays out in the same way as a video game, where you have to clear everything in order to progress, or things are scripted in such a way that you have to succeed, or something like that. They apply lessons that they've learned from vidya and then become befuddled when it doesn't play out how they think it will.

I'll give an example from my session this past weekend. Our original DM came back for a one-shot involving a fungal takeover of Phandalin, with our party investigating the town and the body horrors caused by fungal infection. We eventually determined we need to head below the town to tackle the source, and after fighting some fungal monstrosities, the cavern started to collapse as an entity appeared to purge the remnants. A pathway was revealed that led back to the surface, but as we began to escape, it began collapsing behind us. Meanwhile, the townsfolk that were previously being controlled by the fungus snapped out of it and begged the party to help them escape. However, disintegrating beams were wiping them out yet seemingly sparing our party members. The DM then asked us what we wanted to do.

Now, given the context here, the logical answer was to get the fuck outta Dodge. The entity that was cleaning up the remaining infestation was obviously protecting us since the beams were not targeting us, and the pathway collapsing was clearly to prevent the infected villagers from avoiding the purge. Seems obvious, yes?

Five out of seven party members chose to run back and save the villagers. Only two of us (myself being one of them) ran like hell and didn't look back, and we got away safely. Going back proved to be a waste of time, as anyone they tried to save was indeed disintegrated. The group did manage to come up with an idea to escape involving a teleporting pet and rope, but one of them still perished in the cave collapse, and the remaining four barely managed to get away before the entire town got pummeled into a crater. Afterward, the DM told me that he should have just killed all of them for being stupid, but he was feeling lenient (except for that one death due to bad rolls on the player's part).

But this illustrates my point fairly well. Players frequently fall into a trap where they assume that things will work out just because they're being the good guys, throwing out common sense as they charge headlong into a situation that they're clearly not prepared for. You can make it as obvious as possible that a particular path is a bad option, and you'll still have players take it because they think they're supposed to. Makes for quite the teachable moment, though.

(The other fun part of that one-shot was that, any time the DM noticed a player wasn't paying attention to the game, he'd inflict 1d4 psychic damage on their character. He never explained why, and everyone assumed it was just something to do with the fungus. I only caught on right at the end.)
 
But this illustrates my point fairly well. Players frequently fall into a trap where they assume that things will work out just because they're being the good guys, throwing out common sense as they charge headlong into a situation that they're clearly not prepared for. You can make it as obvious as possible that a particular path is a bad option, and you'll still have players take it because they think they're supposed to. Makes for quite the teachable moment, though.

Part of this I think is player expectations versus DM expectations. For a one shot it wouldn't matter so much, but if the DM thinks he is running a dark fantasy, grimdark campaign while the players think they're playing a noblebright high fantasy campaign then there'll eventually be conflict between them. It's why having a sort of Session 0 or a discussion about expectations regarding the game at the start is a great idea. I ran into the same problem the last time I DMed a campaign. We were playing Curse of Strahd and I wanted it to be a gothic fantasy while the players wanted it to be more like regular DnD, so there was a disconnect between what I thought they would do and what they actually did. For example, fighting a half dozen werewolves at level 2.
 
Part of this I think is player expectations versus DM expectations. For a one shot it wouldn't matter so much, but if the DM thinks he is running a dark fantasy, grimdark campaign while the players think they're playing a noblebright high fantasy campaign then there'll eventually be conflict between them. It's why having a sort of Session 0 or a discussion about expectations regarding the game at the start is a great idea. I ran into the same problem the last time I DMed a campaign. We were playing Curse of Strahd and I wanted it to be a gothic fantasy while the players wanted it to be more like regular DnD, so there was a disconnect between what I thought they would do and what they actually did. For example, fighting a half dozen werewolves at level 2.
That definitely wasn't the issue this time, as most of us already knew what to expect from his campaigns. He basically mentioned that although it was a one-shot, it would give a setup to allow for more one-shots in the same story, so he could drop in and out as needed if our current DM needed a break (and if he wasn't too busy to prepare more). I think the issue is how the other players perceived what was "good" and "bad," unable to realize that the admittedly frightening entity that was purging the infestation was also the one that had been helping them all along, albeit cryptically. To them, they saw a being with ram horns and an angelic and demonic hand that was disintegrating the poor townsfolk as the source of the corruption and felt they had a duty to save them, despite the fact that the DM explicitly pointed out the beams were deliberately avoiding the party members. As a result, they nearly lost their lives, and one actually did.

Meanwhile, the monk and wizard (myself) had much better self-preservation instincts and got the fuck away from whatever it was, escaping unscathed. Moral of the story: it doesn't matter how good your intentions are, a stupid idea is still a stupid idea.

(This did lead the DM to consider deliberately killing off every replacement character of the player who died as a running gag in future sessions. If he doesn't somehow get killed over the course of the session, he'll concoct something like "that dagger you stole was actually cursed and you die of exploding dick" or something. Y'know, an "oh my god, they killed Kenny!" situation. Probably won't do that because rolling new characters every time would get old quick, especially at higher levels, but it's a funny thought.)
 
Spoilers: It's not and I will never stop shitting all over this terrible fucking game.
Oh yeah, it's overrated as hell. But there's enough there and it fits a niche enough that I sort of recommend it, at least for mining stuff from its setting. The faction designs and motivations for the city and the city itself has a pretty decent set to mine from, particularly for starting DMs. The Lampblack gang being a former guild that used to light the street lights before electricity made them worthless for example was a pretty neat idea. It also has decent generative tables to boot.

I actually would recommend at least the back half specifically to help DMs learn how to run stuff if they're new, since it gives a lot of tools and ideas to help with that funnily enough. It's the book's strength IMO. It's also an okay game to run on an episodic basis between campaigns or if you can't be fucked to run the proper one since Dave the cheeky cunt flaked again.

It has some of the same big flaws in mechanics PbtA has however, though at least this time you can actually have them die. Yes, that's a praise for this, since we're in that fucking time period now. No that's still horrible that I have to say this. It does you ignore them saying "nuh-uh" and taking stress to tank shit. But they can't do that forever, it'll force them to go nuts and be forcibly retired. Also yes, you can legitimately lose a character from just being in social situations until you completely snap. It's really fucking funny.

Honestly the biggest issue is that it tries to set mechanics for factions, gangs, and characters, and it doesn't quite cover enough. It's still decent for episodic play for those who can't be fucked to learn Shadowrun IMO though. It's just that like PbtA, they really seek to explain everything in a dry and clunky as fuck video game style terms while also not actually using their pages as cleanly as they could. It's just annoying.

I will however say the book makes me fucking hate Candela Obscura so much more given how much of a shitty rip it is of the book wholesale.
 
Even after mentioning to them multiple times that they "don't need to fight the enemies" and "they still haven't checked the Northern path yet", they still chose to fight the monsters then were surprised when it nearly killed them. Really, I don't think they're going to get the message until it DOES kill them. My players aren't as retarded as many, but something tells me they aren't really cut out for what my game is trying to go for. They still enjoy it, but they're not getting the best experience they can because they just don't pay attention or think very critically.
If they are having trouble with something that simple they'd run for the hills if they encountered one of my dungeons. One of my basic goblin camps would give them ptsd. Since you like them and want to continue playing with them I think you are going to have to pivot to a more combat simplified encounter from now on. Instead of going for Arcanum these players seem to be more of a Skyrim player base.
 
We were playing Curse of Strahd and I wanted it to be a gothic fantasy while the players wanted it to be more like regular DnD, so there was a disconnect between what I thought they would do and what they actually did. For example, fighting a half dozen werewolves at level 2.
I've given up hope that a campaign will ever not be vaguely 4th wall breaking, mostly silly shit. It's fine, I've reached the stage of grief to acknowledge that everyone is having fun and I can too but if the choice is to act a fool or or be totally srs guyz, people will go with option A) 99% of the time. I'll still try when I'm a PC damn it but whatever, just gotta roll with it or else people will post about me in one of these types of forums being an autistic tryhard that isn't fitting in.

C'est la vie.
 
It's fine, I've reached the stage of grief to acknowledge that everyone is having fun and I can too but if the choice is to act a fool or or be totally srs guyz, people will go with option A) 99% of the time.
I had a very serious CoC campaign, and if you know that game, it can be stressful and even depressing if played straight, so I'd occasionally have one shots to blow off the steam. The main semi-normal one was Stormbringer, where we'd play an actual scenario but the characters were over the top caricatures trying to act like Ming the Merciless.

I didn't set out to do it that way, it just turned out that way.
 
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The best thing to do in situations like this is to just sit down and talk with him 1:1. Figure out what the deal is and see if you two can't solve it. If you can't, or if either party is unwilling to, then ditch him and move on. I've had to do this in my own campaign before-- telling players straight up that they're unfit to play the game for whatever reason. In my own case it was mental problems but some people might just not like the system or style, setting, etc.
I'm leaving out a possibly bigger problem.
I'm a first time GM so obviously there will some bumps in the road. But other players say my games fun, give me tips, if my game getting too dark or whatever. They even tell me if they have to leave out for a min or two like picking up their groceries, and tell me if their pusedo-party NPC friend is bordering on GMPC. (nobody picked doctor in the party so I bring a doctor NPC for combat heavy sessions in case they need healing) I give them this common courtesy too if something temporarily brings me out of the game.
So this one retard does not do all that above. Before he lost attention, I thought he was either shy or I might be too imidating, and maybe just generally being together would ease him. But no, he never said anything at all. He gave me an apology on him slowing down the game so I was willing to let him slide since it was the first time he spoke and he apologized. Then he did it again and actually left this time and there was no apology. Didn't tell us why, it was an emergency, or anything after all that. Then he showed up for the down time pusedo session -where the group is clearly having fun- without saying anything, and the whole group instantly transisitioned into the 'awkard silence' phase.
The retard's apology was full of "my mental health" blaming, while the group has one autistic player and I didn't knew that until he told me.
I'm actually getting increasingly angry at the retard.
 
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