Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Fapcop]

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"Alright ladies and gents, eyes up and ears open!
We have lot "Slatternly Whore", a whole half-dozen collection! Not high in value, but they sell! Who am I to judge!

Bidding starts at a blazing $300—that’s right, 6 crisp KNUs! We’ve got heat in the house, bidders circlin’ like hawks— @Fapcop in the game and the stakes are high! All proceeds goin’ to a good cause, folks—helpin’ drug addicts in need! Now let’s do some good with some fast cash!

Goin’ once! Goin’ twice!—Who’s gonna take it home?!"

OH BOY! OH BOY!

THREE HUNDRED RIGHT HERE!

THREE TWENTY if you throw in one of the nudes Nick took when Kayla was passed out!

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Totally not a father of five in his forties. A felonious cuck who’s a total failure both in terms of legal career and a role model.

Nay, he is CHAOS! A trickster like character, forever young, that puts the Joker to shame!

 

[RodgerDodger]

Even simpler, isn't it 'MAY' be deferred? Can't judge simply not defer it without explanation after seeing other lawyers being harassed in the chats?

As for the probation violation, I think that will come in the form of him pissing hot, or doing something else really dumb. Like visibly drinking or doing drugs on stream.

Neither the Judge nor his Parole Officer will give much of a shit regarding an internet slap fight between lawyers involving AI voices.

But what they will note is Nick still looks strung out and high as a kite in these streams. And that's gonna be a huge problem for Nick. He's already deep on the Judges shit list. 5 years Probation? Yeah he has just one chance to make good in the Judges eyes and he's already fucking it up.

The problem with Hollywood clean and sober is that really only works with Hollywood Courts. Who have long turned a blind eye to their main local industries excesses. Watching Nick, the PO will want some tests. Frequently. If those tests come back containing more Benzo's than Blood and Urine questions will be asked. "I have a prescription" is not magic words to keep you out of jail. They will ask the prescribing doctor what the deal is. The prescribing physician does not want to get on anybodies radar over controlled substances. He needs his DEA number. He will fully cooperate. After all he probably did not know Nick was convicted for drug offenses.

And as has been noted, not serving the 30 days is at the Judges discretion for good behavior. Not anything guaranteed to Nick. Chances are that will be off the table.

 

[crab fucker]

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Nick definitely got hit with a privacy complaint because he is hyper assblasted on Xitter at 01:30 central time, right now.

It's crazy to me that someone who was a lawyer (at some point and to some degree) doesn't understand what express written permission means, lol. I don't think Aaron's kids could even possibly consent to being used in this ai superchat shit, so Melton can probably get absolutely destroyed and have every single one of his shows taken down.

 

[Microplastics In My Blood]

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( A1 | A2 | A3 )

What this looks like:

This reddit genie shtick is so tiring. He thinks it makes him look so smart by talking in "uhhhmmm acktuallys" but it just makes him look like slimy liar. Having to find the 100% technically correct language that he has decided is the correct passcode like you are chanting a spell is peak mid-wit

Imagine being his room mate in college:
>Did you eat my spaghetti that was in the fridge?
No, I didn't eat any spaghetti in the fridge
>Did you remove my spaghetti from the fridge and then eat it?
No, I didn't eat any spaghetti that I didn't consider mine
> Did you eat the spaghetti that I labelled with my name, that was in the fridge in the dorm at some point after being in the fridge at the store before being consumed by you?
Well it was a ready meal so by that logic it was in a fridge at the store, so how can we establish a time line with that logic?

1 hour later
> Did you remove the ready meal, mainly consisting of noodle shaped pasta ,that was assuming the info on the packaging was correct, 387 calories, weighing 170 metric grams, purchased from Walmart for $0.75 US dollars including local sales tax and at current dollar value at 4:23pm CDT Daylight Savings Time, on 05/06/2002 AD Gregorian Calendar, US date format, the time where it was removed from the fridge in the store, where it labelled with my legal first name in modern US English after returning to the Sneed dorm no.14 and then was stored and last seen 27 minutes after I closed the door fully after returning from Walmart by me in the Blue, Igloo brand fridge 2 imperial US ft, the measurement not the human body part, to my, not your, left from my current potion in 3 dimensional space from said fridge before you consumed most, if not all, of the edible parts of the dish by placing it in you mouth and swallowing. Also assuming all numbers are rounded to positive integer.
Yes but I don't see why it matters, it's kind of funny and weird when you think about it.
> BECAUSE I HAVE NO MONEY AND I HAVEN'T EATEN IN THREE DAYS
what do you mean by no money and by what metric are you measuring these "days"?

 

[crab fucker]

Null, maybe your lolcow sense have dulled. Nick is a boring lolcow? No... no, there's still plenty of milk in this cow.

 

[Maude Snew]

He's basically giving Kurt the "you are fat and I wouldn't have sex with you" line.

Bold of you to assume that there's a single man on this planet that Nick "I need someone to come and inject stuff into my ass" Rekieta would not have sex with.

 

[AnOminous]

As I understand it, my responsibility here is to not touch the cow. This I have adhered to.

I don't really consider it tipping if the cow touches you first.

 

[PuffyPopcorn]

No, but they act like it. They are all middle-aged Gen X losers that think they're comedians and still act like they are in the cool clique in high school. The dabbleverse is the most embarrassing shit ever. Worst part is that the main target of these sad sacks of shit, Stuttering John Melendez of The Howard Stern Show, hasn't even been interesting to follow for like 5 years now. It's why they are now desperately trying to shift their focus to a boring cow like Aaron.

Hey. Don't throw us Gen X'ers in with him. Remember Nick is an Millennial

 

[Strix454]

Kurt's weight is such a retarded angle of attack anyways.

Its just something Nick is copying from his e-daddy Juju the cow. And Nick attacks just about all men as "fat". If you are not an emaciated twig-boy aiming to have a twink body like Nick is, you are "fat". Its more about Nick's warped idea of what attractive is and his eating disorder than it is about Kurt or anyone else's weight.

 

[woodedbag]

i really dont give a flying fuck about this super chat shit between boomers. where are the updates on this cyber crime investigation aaron has been baiting for months? i need either that or a full relapse and im back in on the rekieta watching!

 

[Father Balldo]

What needs to happen now:

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Fuck you Kurt! I will fire up a stream and make you sorry!

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It is time to receive another punishment.

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I really doubt MNPublicRecords has anything more to post. It's wishful thinking at best. I know Potentially Criminal and Meme Copium have said as much but this wouldn't be the first time either of them have been incorrect or floated some potential happening that turned into a nothingburger.. I remember this shit happening like a month or two ago as well, that some big news was going to drop and absolutely nothing happened.

You are mixing up people discussing the harassment by Nick, the C&D against Melton, and copyright/privacy strikes on Youtube.
The only thing of those three that could result in Nick's probation being violated is the first.

Nothing will happen to Nick unless someone files a police report, they investigate, and file criminal charges.
Which is in theory possible because he harassed people and might have committed the common law tort of Invasion of Privacy and, which the state of Minnesota recognizes. Does one of the people Nick is mocking have enough of a hateboner to do it? I doubt it, so its overall unlikely.
But Nick is not helping himself with his behavior.

I'm not mixing up anything. I'm talking about people who are saying shit like "even if he had a medical marijuana card it would violate his probation" or things of a similar ilk.

 

[Fapcop]

He just won't stop. Asks viewers to harass and mock Kurt

Timestamps pls? I can’t be bothered to suffer through Nicks slop.

 

[Microplastics In My Blood]

Its just something Nick is copying from his e-daddy Juju the cow. And Nick attacks just about all men as "fat". If you are not an emaciated twig-boy aiming to have a twink body like Nick is, you are "fat". Its more about Nick's warped idea of what attractive is and his eating disorder than it is about Kurt or anyone else's weight.

And you can value a man based on how much puss he smashes, amirite bro? (he had one sexual partner his wife who has a "ruined body" and any admirable qualities of this he ruined by sleeping with a coked out ZZZ list e-celeb social climber while his wife posed naked for a man he hates)

 

[AnOminous]

You are mixing up people discussing the harassment by Nick, the C&D against Melton, and copyright/privacy strikes on Youtube.
The only thing of those three that could result in Nick's probation being violated is the first.

He doesn't need to violate probation anyway. They can simply cite a bunch of shenanigans on his part and choose not to defer his jail. Or, conceivably, choose not to defer with no explanation at all.

People in real life comparing themselves to the joker are the biggest red flags to walk the Earth.

As a teenager, it's forgivable. It's mega-cringe but so are teenagers in general.

For a 40+ year old "man" to do it is absolutely gobsmackingly retarded. And probably a psycho, just not a cool psycho like the Joker.

Remember Nick is an Millennial

Nick is a millennial-aged boomer who combines the worst traits of both generations.

 

[A Very Big Fish]

Kurt's weight is such a retarded angle of attack anyways. Going from fat to fit is more of a curable situation than going from an emaciated drugged up skeleton to fit. If Nick wants to attack anyone for their health, he should start with the man in the cocaine tray's mirror.

Spoiler: ChatGPT analysis

Ran some facts about the two into ChatGPT and got this:

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I swear on my fucking life, I didn't feed it the "chaos" moniker, it came up with that on its own.

The Emaciated Chaos Engine has a chance, but it's much more of a long shot than Kurt's health situation. However, Nick is a homosexual and only values whether he finds a body visually appealing. Health has nothing to do with his perspective. He's basically giving Kurt the "you are fat and I wouldn't have sex with you" line.

'The Emaciated Chaos Engine' sounds like one of the Yugioh cards my little brother had.

 

[Gobermental Supervisor]

He doesn't need to violate probation anyway. They can simply cite a bunch of shenanigans on his part and choose not to defer his jail. Or, conceivably, choose not to defer with no explanation at all.

Yep, they can absolutely do that. (And I hope they do, Nick deserves it)
I interpret "violate his Probation" as putting the entire plea deal in question and Nick showing up in front of the judge having to explain some specific violation of his conditions. Which could be "remain law abiding" if someone wanted to really fuck with him.

 

[Sneed Force One]

The Balldo Report
04/30/25
​

Thanks to whiny psychodrama, Nick has won himself a temporary reprieve from his dwindling liveviewer numbers, earning himself a whopping 124 additional viewers! An increase of a whole 5.39%!

Spoiler: Congratulations!

Unfortunately for Nick, no drama comes without its highs and lows. And boy oh boy, there's still the Marina Trench to discover in the near future.

Today's Superchats was a mere $172 dollars (not counting criminally operated Pedotips), From a $1,136 dollars on his return YouTube stream, to a measly $172 dollars. A violently sharp drop of 84.85%.
Split into about 8 hours (streaming and preparation before going live). This equates into $21.5 an hour. That doesn't even cover the cost of a single piano lesson Nick!
If trends continue, Nick Rekieta will earn less than Minnesota state minimum wage in a few days. Can he produce enough payroll to convince his parole officer of gainful employment?

To twist the knife, UncivlLaw is now outperforming him.

 

[RaptInPlastic]

A good lunch, check in here and
Yup Rekieta's gonna immolate. To ashes, pretty much.
Sean is obviously not a boastful or faking mental cripple like Rekieta so now we see "lawpope" (cringe) versus "actual attorney who is not insane"

 

[Captain Manning]

I really doubt MNPublicRecords has anything more to post. It's wishful thinking at best. I know Potentially Criminal and Meme Copium have said as much but this wouldn't be the first time either of them have been incorrect or floated some potential happening that turned into a nothingburger.

I highly doubt Sean would say anything unless A) He absolutely knew it to be true, or B) He at least strongly suspects it's true.

And I am not about to press him on the matter. All will be revealed in time.

Either way, "70 pages" is a very specific claim.

I dunno a lot about Meme. @Dixieland Buckaroo seems to think he's solid, so I'll just go with that. Over time, you begin to learn the difference between the Kiwis that are pretty solid, and those that are full of shit or express shit opinions. He's in the former group.

What I think might be happening here is that MNPR has to pace himself. He's likely got stuff, but it's a finite supply of stuff. That's exactly how it happened last "season." And MNPR also said this is season 2. Not a one and done drop for 2025.

Also, Nick has changed up his schedule. This used to be a night thing. Now it's a morning thing. The April address thing dropped in response to a nightly Locals stream.

We'll just have to wait and see.

EDIT: Elaboration.

 

[Father Balldo]

I highly doubt Sean would say anything unless A) He absolutely knew it to be true, or B) He at least strongly suspects it's true.

As much as I like Sean's content, he's already hyped up something that never surfaced. Fool me once, shame on.. shame on you?? Fool me twi--we won't get fooled again.