Zoosadist Claudio Hernández Castañeda / FakeAFClausMystery / ClausMystery / ClausWritesThings / ClausofLions / Yayotzin / Yayofangamer / Gonebythedust - Mexican Furfaggot. Disowned Synthcel. Cub Fur Author. Pseudo-Diety of the Popufurs. Hates Gringos. Bisexual Shapeshifter. The Raped. Tracheal Tube Tard. Pink Triangle Halal. Total OPsec Disaster. A Lesson in Lurking. Still The Same Nigger 10 Years later.

[Sperg Spectating]

Why can verified and pink triangles lock their profiles. wtf. This nigga is a lolcow he shouldn't have these perms.

Josh said he would fix this.

Eventually.

 

[Tread Miller]

Despite me being a fatso at the time

Yeah right, "at the time." You're probably still a fatso today, I doubt you have the strength to exercise if you need a tracheal tube to breathe.

Hmhmm. I totally raped that cat, totally. I raped it so hard, I sent it to the fourth dimension and it became a schrodinger's raped cat! /sneed

Can another True & Honest user postmark this post? I lost my postmarking privileges but I believe this admission of guilt is important for all future highlight-surfers.

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

He's almost there guys. He's almost realizing what I told him from the start.

Do you guys think he's happier figuring out our true intentions, or when he found that stray cat?

my vote is on the stray cat.

He had two accounts, actually. He was also @LegendaryChristorian

Forgot your password award.

Can another True & Honest user postmark this post? I lost my postmarking privileges but I believe this admission of guilt is important for all future highlight-surfers.

I was going to but sperg already did.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Just had to throw this one together quickly

 

[Guns of the Gaytriots]

I've decided that enough has happened in the last month and a half (Jesus how did we get 160 pages in 6 weeks) to warrant an OP rewrite.

I can't believe this post was made last night. We got 13 pages since then. On average, that's about 4 pages per day.

 

[Claudio Hernández Castañeda]

Somebody named @Lyle luv lolishota (what a name) WHO JOINED 6 MINUTES AGO is negrating en masse and only positively rating Claudio. Hmm...

The persecution complex within you is insane.

Remington Rand portable typewriters weigh at most 25 lbs.
View attachment 7410165
Claudio is bragging about lifting 25 lbs.

That's not even the typewriter I have, dumbass.

Kill yourself, your brain doesn't work.

There's something that has hit me a long time ago, but now I can't exactly ignore it anymore. It's been going on for 150 pages and now it's presence is so in my face that I might as well keep crashing on a wall if I keep messing around.

Why are any of you even entertaining me? Why are you bantering?

You think I'm a pedophile, a zoophile and a cat rapist. If that was true, then...

Why are you acting so mellow about it to the point of bantering with the one accused of raping a cat? I just don't get it. Would you banter with a cat rapist, instead of having him dead for rights? I don't think so.


You are doing jokes, bantering with me, you are even being quirky and following my statements as if they were the most entertaining shit you had read in this hour.

Do you see what the fuck I mean now?

You confirmed it, you don't think I actually raped a cat, I'm a zoophile or a pedo.

¡Gracias!

...Yeah, I should had said "dead to rights". It sounds better. Who the fuck says "dead for rights"?

He's almost there guys. He's almost realizing what I told him from the start.

Do you guys think he's happier figuring out our true intentions, or when he found that stray cat?

You are still a deranged closeted lolicon who should be taken out back.

Not even mexicans want a street rat like you. Your Testarone levels show more when you sperg out in the thread. I came by to impart my knowledge, LMFAO leaving doesn't mean leaving the farms like your tube neck ass insisted you do. It's me lurking. But do insist on this game of winning.

At least my ancestors weren't fucking enclosed by a mountain chain from the northern half of the continent. Yours surely did.

Or at least Mexican mothers do not twerk in their children's faces. Yours do, retard.

I mean Emily is almost as retarded as him and she barely even insists on winning over anything. If anything a shared trait with Lolcows is that they have to prove to everyone that they aren't a rapist/pedo/zoo/groomer/sholicub/furry/gooner/troon/poon/art tracer

Over half of your ethnicity group in USA can't even fucking read above high school level, "Arinsu". The majority of the homosexual population in USA is BLACK PEOPLE.

So your doctor said you are bad at blowing but you give good suck?

...Sparkletor, can you please define what's a woman to me? Do it STAT. Right now. The definition better actually define what's a woman.

It must feel so bad having a tracheal tube, and never being capable of doing the most masculine thing ever, that is doing Mongolian throat singing.

Sucks to be you, Claudio, you will be living as a manlet for the rest of your life.

Can you guys pick a lane? Are mongols a good thing or not? I mean, Juan Mexicano (@JohnnyGringo) keeps calling me a mongoloid for a reason, right?

Yeah right, "at the time." You're probably still a fatso today, I doubt you have the strength to exercise if you need a tracheal tube to breathe.

BMI. Give me your BMI in this instant. Include height as well.

Josh said he would fix this.

I will keep note of this in the future. Totally not inciting harassment, guys.

 

[The Strongest Haaton]

The persecution complex within you is insane.

And you only come back very shortly after that account got wiped

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Sparkletor, can you please define what's a woman to me? Do it STAT. Right now. The definition better actually define what's a woman.

SFCC

---

Suck and fuck and cook and clean
Baby you know what I mean
You gotta do it every day
Suck and fuck and cook and clean
Slut you know what I mean
It's your daily routine

First you suck
Then you fuck
Then you cook
And last you clean

Suck and fuck and cook and clean
Baby do you know what I mean?
I'm the king of the castle
Suck and fuck and cook and clean
Baby you know what I mean
Don't give me a hassle

First you suck
Then you Fuck
Then you cook
And last you clean

Suck and fuck
Cook and clean
Come on slut
You know what the hell I mean

If you want to please your master
You got to do it faster
If you want to be my wife
You got to do it all the rest of your life

First you suck,slut
Then you fuck,yeah you dumb airhead
Then you cook,eat lots of food
Then you clean my pad

Wash my socks,scrub my ass
Draw me a bath bitch
Then you cook me a feast
Yeah
Then you clean,scrub my pad throughly
Suck and fuck and cook and clean
Slut,you know it's your future
If you know what I mean
Suck and fuck and cook and clean
It's your daily routine

 

[DoNotFeedTheSneed]

I can't believe this post was made last night. We got 13 pages since then. On average, that's about 4 pages per day.

anyway 4 pages a day

That's not even the typewriter I have, dumbass.

Kill yourself, your brain doesn't work.

post the exact model number and serial number of your typewriter

...Yeah, I should had said "dead to rights". It sounds better. Who the fuck says "dead for rights"?

Claudio... taking an L?! No, it can't be!

 

[Nicholas II of Russia]

Can you guys pick a lane? Are mongols a good thing or not? I mean, Juan Mexicano (@JohnnyGringo) keeps calling me a mongoloid for a reason, right?

Mongoloid is a different entire thing from a Mongolian, you loaf of unbaked dough.

 

[NuIItley]

Claudio can you slow down? I'm busy with other things right now and I don't wanna look through 10 pages worth of posts just to skim through and negrate all of them. Calm down a little bit. Stop posting so much. I know you don't have a life, but the rest of us do.

 

[Po's Cootah]

Claudio can you slow down? I'm busy with other things right now and I don't wanna look through 10 pages worth of posts just to skim through and negrate all of them. Calm down a little bit. Stop posting so much. I know you don't have a life, but the rest of us do.

But he promised he would present all the evidence against Kiwi Farms' slander today... So where is it?
@Claudio Hernández Castañeda

 

[Balanced Boomer]

I just had a vision of @Claudio Hernández Castañeda sitting in a room full of black people and every time he wheezes through his tube all the black people start staring at the ceiling trying to figure out where the chirping is coming from.

 

[Claudio Hernández Castañeda]

I think some of you haven't noticed what you just accomplished by accepting you were lying about being concerned about a dead fucking cat (*COUGHCOUGH* @Sperg Spectating, @Tablet County d @Tread Miller *COUGHCOUGH*

I didn't MEAN TO FUCKING SEND THAT SHIT YET.

@Null, your fucking shitty, reta4def jannies destroyed my capability to edit, something very crucial for anyone.

This is why you separate Edit and Delete, you fucking fat, pale twink bitch.

 

[Null]

stop crying you fat brown bitch

 

[Admiral Throbnelius]

Careful Null, he can lift a Remington typewriter and might drop on it on your face which would really hurt dude.

 

[NuIItley]

*COUGHCOUGH*

Stop honking your horn at us, we know you're retarded.

[...]were lying about being concerned about a dead fucking cat

We were (ARE) concerned about the possibility of you being directly responsible for said cat's death, seeing that you're a furry zoophile, and with most certainty, the only furry zoophile living in your block as a whole. It'd be far more surprising to everybody else ITT if it was revealed that you WEREN'T the one responsible for sexually abusing the poor thing. Literally everything points to you being the one who did it.

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

Good thing Null is a dog and not a cat. I’d be fearing for Null’s safety otherwise

 

[Claudio Hernández Castañeda]

I should had added "balding" and "closeted homo" when I @'ed Null, Oh well. The "what if"s and the "why didn't I" don't exist in reality. The past is now the past.

Where was I?

Right.

Stop honking your horn at us, we know you're retarded.

We were (ARE) concerned about the possibility of you being directly responsible for said cat's death, seeing that you're a furry zoophile, and with most certainty, the only furry zoophile living in your block as a whole. It'd be far more surprising to everybody else ITT if it was revealed that you WEREN'T the one responsible for sexually abusing the poor thing. Literally everything points to you being the one who did it.

No you don't! Kill yourself in front of HomoJoshua, in real life, STAT. Now. AHORA MISMO. Thank you.

Let me start again.

I think some of you haven't noticed what you just accomplished by accepting you were lying about being concerned about a dead fucking cat (*COUGHCOUGH* @Sperg Spectating, @Tablet County @Tread Miller *COUGHCOUGH*)

You just gave me every single reason to not have to prove ANYTHING related to the cat. You can make all the jokes you want, make up all the shitty zoophilia fanfics in your head, or call me a rapist. But we all know you don't believe I did anything bad to the cat, you dumb fucks.

You, by talking with your gut, acquited me of any accusation you ever did in regards of the cat. It's amazing how unaware of your own words you can be.

But, there's an important issue I would like to point out now. Remember when you made fun of:

— My rare congenital disease
— The fact you made fun of how furries went mask off to me?
— How a retarded, man hating bitch (Gabby) humiliated my teen aged self in group therapy, amongst women and teens?
— The possibility I had to use a wheelchair
— Obnoxious, very rapey incest jokes (I'm looking at you, @Sparkletor 2.0,, you cunt)
— The equivalent of "haha Claudio incel" jokes
— My tracheotomy

Wanna know who does that? Wanna know who makes fun of things someone else never had control over?

Evil people. Demons in the flesh.

That's what you are. Thanks for showing how you truly are inside.

 

[Balanced Boomer]

I didn't MEAN TO FUCKING SEND THAT SHIT YET.

Null, your fucking shitty, reta4def jannies destroyed my capability to edit, something very crucial for anyone.

This is why you separate Edit and Delete, you fucking fat, pale twink bitch.

Aww yeah, I fucking love having options to edit my posts! It's so great! If I make a mistake, I can just edit it out, and if it's complete dog shit, I can just hit delete! I love being an official Karen Farms Good Boi!

ETA: screen of my edit options from another post PRAISE BE THE LORD.


ETA2: fixed typos because Jesus is my savior.