Orbiter "Flutter" / "Egg" / "Cabbage Patch" / "Meryl" / "Food Lion lady" - Modern Christory's biggest mystery

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Ser Ciappelletto said:
Chris apparently views air fresheners as aphrodisiacs of some kind. The hotel in the Giant Penis Comic is outfitted with FIVE of them all positioned around the befd.View attachment 7436985
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Chris has a simple mind. Remember, this is the same man that thought listening to binarial beats.would give a larger breasts.

And the smell of axe would make all the boyfriend free girls crawl to him.
 
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Ser Ciappelletto said:
Chris apparently views air fresheners as aphrodisiacs of some kind.
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Those who aren't deranged idiots would get incense or scented candle to set the mood. Like how non-freaks may take out ads or use dating sites instead of derping with signs.

*("Honor Roll" defended derping with "Attraction Signs" by derping that "Newspaper/Magazine Ads, Online Dating Sites, Video Dating Services to name a few; THEY COST MONEY.")

Acoustic Virgin said:
it wouldn't surprise me if the Chandlers sprayed around air freshener in lieu of cleaning (the same way Chris, himself, would squirt himself with Axe instead of bathing)
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That's also what I was thinking. I don't think I would want to know just how horrifying the odors in that monster's realm used to be.

(Wherever "Chris Chan" lives now probably reeks too.)
 
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knux said:
"My two balls...PENIS COMIC!...Deep into his anus".
Still makes me smile to this day:


Ah, Classic Chris was so ridiculous.
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lol that always reminds me of GTA radio commercials.
Also
>includes: Vivian Gee sex tape
If only Chris paused the video at the right time and saw this... he would have endorsed the project since day one.
 
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knux said:
"My two balls...PENIS COMIC!...Deep into his anus".
Still makes me smile to this day:


Ah, Classic Chris was so ridiculous.
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To be fair i'm a bit surprised nobody has actually done some kind of audiobook version of all his shit. Considering the kind of garbage audible and spotify are full of these days it would fit right in. Doubly so if they added the nice touch of having the narration done in an AI bob voice, with a special intro from bob about how angry he is at chris for trapping him in some metaphysical limbo and denying him his proper afterlife by putting him into his comics
 
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Merton J. Dingle said:
Alternatively, Barb could have angrily blurted out that she would have had sex with him without thinking about what she was saying. Chris is retarded enough to take everything literally regardless of the conflict between the person's word and every other means of communication that humans have at their disposal. They were going through the lawsuit with Michael Schneider when this happened, so Barb was completely justified in being angry with him.
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B-but you don't understand! If he was jailed because of the Snyder thing, he would starve to death (since eating jail food was out of the question, as he said) so he would die a virgin! It was basically an emergency! (For those who don't know, this is literally what Chris actually believed at that time).

D is for Stupid said:
Chris has a simple mind. Remember, this is the same man that thought listening to binarial beats.would give a larger breasts.
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Well, he wasn't entirely wrong, it consisted of sitting on his fat ass while digesting McDonalds, after all. But on the other hand, he also really believed he would grow a vagina with that binaural beats nonsense.
 
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Since Flutter has been in the CWCsphere, it's interesting to note the astonishment that such interaction generally arouses. Knowing that someone might be interested in Chris isn't surprising in the abstract, given that other suitors have already set their sights on Chris, such as Fiona and Miss Cherry (the lesser known).
 
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Pink-Over-Nail said:
Since Flutter has been in the CWCsphere, it's interesting to note the astonishment that such interaction generally arouses. Knowing that someone might be interested in Chris isn't surprising in the abstract, given that other suitors have already set their sights on Chris, such as Fiona and Miss Cherry (the lesser known).
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Is this just a fancy way of saying "It's not that weird that Flutter is into Chris, because so was Fiona", or is there more to it?
 
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Pink-Over-Nail said:
Knowing that someone might be interested in Chris isn't surprising in the abstract, given that other suitors have already set their sights on Chris, such as Fiona and Miss Cherry (the lesser known).
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I'm maintained this from the beginning. I think most people tend to forget that weird freaks couple up and reproduce all the time, go to your local Wal-mart and look around they are all over the place.

Its one of the reasons I've never bought into the whole Cabbage being some super secret Caden plant and or hired tard wrangler. There is no shortage of women with 0 standards or bizarre attractions out there.
 
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That Guy Who Likes The Chili said:
I'm maintained this from the beginning. I think most people tend to forget that weird freaks couple up and reproduce all the time, go to your local Wal-mart and look around they are all over the place.

Its one of the reasons I've never bought into the whole Cabbage being some super secret Caden plant and or hired tard wrangler. There is no shortage of women with 0 standards or bizarre attractions out there.
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Cabbage was always a terrible vegetable.

I don't think Flutter is helping in the shroom garden either.
 
Honey Pie said:
I would say that Caden definitely has Chris under his thumb and the amount of control he has over Chris is new. Caden is CWC’s landlord, manager, possible housemate, and is enabling his delusions. I would argue that he has more control over Chris than even Bob or Barb did because he can monitor Chris’s online presence.
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I think Caden might be selling shrooms again, and that might be why Chris is so tight-lipped about where he lives. I'm sure if Caden sat Chris down and explained that himself, Chris and Flutter would all end up in jail if his address got leaked.
Hell, he might have even told Chris if he went blabbing about their address Caden would kick him out.
 
PhoBingas said:
I think Caden might be selling shrooms again, and that might be why Chris is so tight-lipped about where he lives. I'm sure if Caden sat Chris down and explained that himself, Chris and Flutter would all end up in jail if his address got leaked.
Hell, he might have even told Chris if he went blabbing about their address Caden would kick him out.
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Chris has avoided giving the public his exact address before. It's just 14BC he does that with regularly.
 
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