"Mad at the Internet" - a/k/a My Psychotherapy Sessions

[Null]

brahman are very cute because they have a big hump and floppy ears but they are jeets

 

[buying gf]

brahman are very cute because they have a big hump and floppy ears but they are jeets

You must simply take it from the jeets, you must make your brahman cheese better than anything the subcontinent could produce, and via cultural osmosis make the brahman cow the symbol of Floridian swamps.

 

[DavidS877]

I found a good American breed.
The Florida Cracker

 

[The Lawgiver]

As a last resort apparently donkey cheese is extremely profitable if you can get shit set up to make it. "pule cheese" is what it's called. You're gonna be milking like 100 donkeys or some shit to make one pule cheese though so you'll have to deal with 100 of the eddie murphy creature.

EDIT: also donkey's arent equipped for swamp life so you'd need to like do some weird specialized terrain or something.

 

[Optavia Sales Rep]

Steal the cow from the jeets
Wrap the cheese in those musk grape leaves like the greeks
???
Profit

 

[Sneedmiser]

Brahman don't produce a lot of milk, there have been efforts to cross them with Holstein cows, the most prodigious milkers, but all but one have failed to produce a heat-resistant, high milk-yield cow. That one cow's eggs have been saved by the Cuban government, but so far all cloning efforts have failed, and whatever embryos they made or cells they had are no longer viable.

 

[888Flux]

The Florida Cracker

In Florida you will see cows literally everywhere because there is a tax loophole through the Greenbelt Agricultural tax assessment that allows you to zone any land as agricultural if you put grazing cows on it

 

[Not A Cat Person]

brahman are very cute because they have a big hump and floppy ears but they are jeets

Recreational cultural appropriation is one of the most time-honored American traditions. This would also have the bonus of allowing you to make brahmin burgers at some point in the future which would make jeets absolutely howl and seethe.

 

[NoReturn]

@Null - Suggestion for your hot streaming room: Cooling neck tubes. Grab at least two, throw them in the freezer, stick them on your neck when you get hot. It'll keep you cooler with no noise.


You can probably find them cheaper somewhere, they're just plastic filled with PCM gel.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nqxjfp4Gi0k

 

[Pascal's Wagie]

The weekly round of cheese talk reminded me of this Tony freak out over cheese.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

Juneteenth is wild. It was so half-assedly shoved into federal holiday status that it fuckrd my job's payroll. So a good chunk of people just didn't get paid because no employees were at the banks to get the payroll paperwork that was submitted.

View attachment 7537227

Because of this, some people (myself included) still haven't gotten paid and to remedy it, work is gonna give everyone who who has direct deposit extra $200.

So like, thanks Juneteenth? Mainly for just being a nuisance

Its such a retarded shovel holiday. Another fuckup by Biden.

I like the Japanese "happy monday" system where all of their holidays fall on the Monday of a certain date. So instead of June 19th we should just make the monday of June 19th a day off and call it Freedom Monday. Juneteenth is such a fucking stupid name. There's many teenths. Juneteenth should logically be the entire week of June 13th through June 19th off.

Its whole purpose is to make meaningless plattitudes to the gibsme dats and white women with too much time on their hands. None of them work anyways so I don't know why they need a national holiday.

im going to buy a swamp and figure out how to feed cows swamp juice and swamp grass to make florida swamp cheese.. if you want thousand year old traditions in the us you gotta do it yourself.

Figure out how to milk gators and make gator cheese. Sadly I know they don't lactate as it serves no purpose for lizards and they don't even have the equipment, but perhaps its time science found a way.
You'd probably have an easier time starting out with a goat. I'd imagine it'd be cheaper and goat cheese can be really good.

 

[Irrational Exuberance]

I gotta listen to the rest of the VOD. Had to pause cuz stuff came up, but regarding Styx and chaos magic... I'm a real wizard guys, believe me.

Chaos magic is sort of a wild card. A chaote can use anything in their personal belief system--homosexual cartoon owls, anime characters, God, Wicca, etc.--and as long as they believe it works, it's supposed to work (like something along the lines of The Secret--that "law of attraction" book that Elliot Rodger read). A chaos magician can go through the effort of learning and implementing "real" ritual magic, but doesn't have to. Chaos magicians can use sex magic to manifest their will. e.g. Masturbating.

The joke among modern occultists is that chaos magicians are all chronic masturbators who get off to the idea of having magical powers without actually doing anything.

I can't imagine using your own spirit as a kind of lightning rod for...extranormal forces is especially safe; in popular media, doesn't chaos magick lead to things like howling at the moon and other general insanity?

 

[The Noise]

Must be nice to live in a huge city. The average American does not have access to the stores you do.

And yes, not having cheeses made with milk from special breeds of cows that feed on special turfs is part of the lack of variety. I've never seen Kasseri, Blue Stilton, Fontina, or Mascarpone anywhere in the US and I do look.

But no, now that I'm here and actively visiting stores I've never even seen before and specifically looking for cheeses, please tell me I'm still wrong, still trolling, etc, because you (living in a large city) can find something more obscure than everyone else.

I work as a cheesemonger at a Kroger in a city of roughly ~100,000-200,000 people somewhere in the upper part of the US. So a decently sized city but not really "big" like New York or Detroit or whatever. Everything's super spaced out.

We do have a lot of specialty cheeses like Fontina, Copper Kettle, Gruyère, and others. I'm very passionate about the job and introducing customers to a wide variety of stuff but the problem is that nobody really cares about cheese. The modern American has been buckbroken by your average dairy aisle where you get shitty little plastic packages of a couple of different types of cheddar, pepper jack, and provolone where it's all injected with a billion different artificial preservatives so you can leave it on the shelf and forget about it for a year. The selection we have is a nonstarter for normies because all they see is that it's packaged differently, expires sooner, and costs more. Even if they do spring for our stuff, they usually stick to safe options like muenster.

Just as an example, we sell 1776 Cheddar, which is essentially just really good aged cheddar with a wax finish that has American colors on it. You'd think this would be a huge hit, especially around July 4th or whatever, but it literally never sells unless we cut up the wheel into smaller wedges and put them in a discount bin. If it weren't for those bins there are a lot of specialty cheeses like aged goat that we would just never fully sell. There's such a wide world of cheeses available but people prefer the chemical slop that tastes like actual plastic.

Also, I don't know if this is just a thing with my store, but upper management gives absolutely zero shits about our cheese department. We have so much trouble keeping up with cheese cutting and other crap that we have no time for product demos or anything fun for customers. It sucks.

 

[Gorton Colu]

but we have less than four people, me included. We have so much trouble keeping up with cheese cutting and other crap that we have no time for product demos or anything fun for customers. It sucks.

That explains why the girl at the Smiths (Kroger) cheese section ignores me. I just thought I was too ugly and retarded to be helped on finding the Havarti I wanted.

 

[FlipTopBox]

All I'll say in regards to the cheese question is that where I currently live I can go to the supermarket in the nearest small town, walk to the deli section, and get a variety of cheeses that are NOT cheddar or mozzarella or swiss. Some of the cheeses are even inported from Europe and other foreign lands (I bought some discounted Wensleydale from there once). It isn't what I'd call a high end supermarket, but it is a chain that's owned by a foreign company.. Can't speak on what it's like in other parts of rural/small town America but that's my experience.

 

[SCRAM]

OH my God nigga who the fuck cares about fucking cheese this goddamn much

Technically if you want to be healthy you should be eating cheese as little as possible and getting your needed fats from things like avacados or something.

"Like avocados or something."

Go back to California you little shit and let me enjoy my cheese in the morning instead of your avocado toast.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

I work as a cheesemonger at a Kroger i

I had no idea Kroger had fine cheeses. I'm going to have to go stop by and check it out.

 

[I'm a Silly]

white women

nice drive-by

 

[prollyanotherlurker]

im going to buy a swamp and figure out how to feed cows swamp juice and swamp grass to make florida swamp cheese.. if you want thousand year old traditions in the us you gotta do it yourself.

Florida swamp cheese is naturally produced by all males living in Florida during the summer already. Just not sure anyone is going to want to eat it.

 

[The Noise]

"Like avocados or something."

Go back to California you little shit and let me enjoy my cheese in the morning instead of your avocado toast.

It's not even correct. Dairy has been a natural part of the human diet for, like, tens of thousands of years. It's only unhealthy for a specific set of non-White ethnicities.

I'm aware it's a popular punching bag but American health advice has been completely twisted by decades of people like Ancel Keys who have irreparably damaged healthy eating by literally making shit up about correlations between certain food groups and heart disease.

I had no idea Kroger had fine cheeses. I'm going to have to go stop by and check it out.

Not every store has a full display but it can't hurt to call ahead.