Bad Adaptations - And why they are bad

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Oh you poor naive soul. You actually think it's gonna be made.
I had a look at his IMDb page, and I’m more concerned that Taika Waititi is attached to a live-action remake of Akira.
Also they're letting him make an Akira movie? They're making a damned Akira movie?! Damn it all. It'll probably make me wish Harry Partridge's version of American Akira was the real one.
According to """rumors""" online Waititi's still trying to make his unnecessary Akira remake at WB, so he's busy with that right now.
This seems like a good thread to dump this. It's over!

Bounding Into Comics: Taika Waititi’s Live-Action ‘Akira’ Officially Dead, Warner Bros. Gives Films Rights Back To Original Manga Publisher Kodansha (archive)
After 20+ years in development Hell and the threat of its story being brought to life under the direction of Taika Waititi, Warner Bros.’ attempt at an live-action adaptation of Katsuhiro Otomo’s seminal manga Akira has officially been relegated to the trash bin of Hollywood.
The Hollywood Reporter: ‘Akira’ Rights Up for Grabs as Japanese Sci-Fi Leaves Warner Bros. (Exclusive) (archive)

I like the bad adaptations that aren't allowed to exist.
 
any movie based on Tom Clancy

I said in another topic that The Hunt for Red October was the film that made me aware there really is a sort of pro-communist bias in Hollywood.

Copy-pasting my rant from there:

The movie never even tells you Marko Ramius' motive for defection, except for a brief, unexplained mention of his wife. The book talks a lot about how Soviet society works and how Ramius had a lifetime of suffering under it, but this is all excised from the film. All we get to see is... one Soviet leader has a nice-looking office.

Then it adds lines where Ramius and his fellow defectors talk about how they would like to see Montana. This is a complete break: novel-Ramius actually thinks America is just like the Soviet Union, but he's so mad at his home country he doesn't even care that he might be helping a country that's just as bad.

On Jack Ryan's side too, the story becomes a "one man figured out the truth" narrative, which then allows the director to make the Soviets all really proper and intelligent while all the Americans are a bunch of meatbrained hicks (who even attempt to kill Ryan for being the smart one!) It even goes so far as to change a British naval officer to an American one and make him, again, a southern meatbrain.

The whole tenor of the movie is then at odds. It's essentially saying "this Ramius guy is pretty retarded for wanting to leave Soviet utopia for American squalor, isn't he?"

.... Need to emphasize that I'm only criticizing Tom Clancy movies (and maybe TV/streaming shows). A few video games that have Clancy's name on them have actually been kinda good.
 
Jurassic Park is an example of the book being wildly different
In the movie, Hammond is a rich eccentric with a mosquito cane. In the book, he’s a scam artist playing Mr. Rogers so he can rob hedge fund bros blind.

And don’t get me started on book Malcolm. (It's just Michael Crichton yelling about how much he hates scientists and the Sierra Club.)
The whole tenor of the movie is then at odds. It's essentially saying "this Ramius guy is pretty retarded for wanting to leave Soviet utopia for American squalor, isn't he?"
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I defect to America… not for freedom… but for big round American woman. Thighs like potato sacks. I want woman who breathe heavy when she stand still.
 
This seems like a good thread to dump this. It's over!

Bounding Into Comics: Taika Waititi’s Live-Action ‘Akira’ Officially Dead, Warner Bros. Gives Films Rights Back To Original Manga Publisher Kodansha (archive)

The Hollywood Reporter: ‘Akira’ Rights Up for Grabs as Japanese Sci-Fi Leaves Warner Bros. (Exclusive) (archive)

I like the bad adaptations that aren't allowed to exist.

Thank fucking god!


In the movie, Hammond is a rich eccentric with a mosquito cane. In the book, he’s a scam artist playing Mr. Rogers so he can rob hedge fund bros blind.

And don’t get me started on book Malcolm. (It's just Michael Crichton yelling about how much he hates scientists and the Sierra Club.)

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I defect to America… not for freedom… but for big round American woman. Thighs like potato sacks. I want woman who breathe heavy when she stand still.

The movie is certainly the better version. (We need a new thread for those too)
Against the Sierra Club?
 
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The adaptation of The Silence of the Lambs was really good and probably better than the book. Every adaptation of Red Dragon has fallen short. I think there have been three so far, and none of them have committed to Will Graham getting mutilated by Francis Dolarhyde and becoming a recluse at the end. This makes some sense in Manhunter, which was a standalone. But once they decided to build a trilogy around Anthony Hopkins, this scene would have explained why that character isn't around and added some historical depth to Silence, which is what a prequel is supposed to do. (The film functions as a prequel, even if the book wasn't written as one.) The TV series departed from the original storyline so much I can't really argue for the scene's inclusion, but Hannibal's goodbye, "I hope you aren't very ugly," would have worked perfectly with the series's themes of aesthetics and manlove.
 
The adaptation of The Silence of the Lambs was really good and probably better than the book. Every adaptation of Red Dragon has fallen short.
The “pulled out of retirement for one last job and immediately dies or goes insane” is played out.

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Graham had already been through hell. Let him patch things up with his family while Lecter moves on. Especially since, as you mentioned, by SOL Lecter had become Byronic Tumblr Sexyman who’s more principled than most non-murderers.
 
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Thank fucking god!
The nightmare isn't over yet. Netflix adaptation when?
Further, Kit claimed that “producers and talent are said to be lining up to attach themselves to the property in preparation to be presented to select studio and streamers,” but did not provide any details as to the possible identities of those involved in this supposed bidding war.
 
An Indian is behind it.
Yep, and I am still seething about it. At least, he gave me a good meme material by making Lady a racist cop

There was a Lupin the 3rd Live action movie that I'm sure was memoryholed to oblivion. Never watched it, but it looked terrible at first glance. Two of them exactly. The 1974 version and the 2014. Any Lupin fans here pitch in and tell how bad these adaptations are?
 
Against the Sierra Club?
So in the middle of his "death scene" (which, by the way, he walks off like a sprained ankle because he’s in the sequel) Malcolm pauses to deliver a rant about how scientists have a god complex because they think smog does stuff to the atmosphere. Like bro, you’re bleeding out from a dinosaur wound, maybe save the Facebook uncle rant for Thanksgiving.
 
So in the middle of his "death scene" (which, by the way, he walks off like a sprained ankle because he’s in the sequel) Malcolm pauses to deliver a rant about how scientists have a god complex because they think smog does stuff to the atmosphere. Like bro, you’re bleeding out from a dinosaur wound, maybe save the Facebook uncle rant for Thanksgiving.

oh lol sounds more like a comedy read.. The movie clearly did it better, becoming a classic.
 
oh lol sounds more like a comedy read.. The movie clearly did it better, becoming a classic.
Honestly, not a bad page-turner. Better than the Lost World novel. Still funny how a guy with an anthropology degree decided every other field was garbage. He’d absolutely be tweeting that windmills give you cancer today.
 
My side of the mountain is a 1960s novel about a kid trying to live in the wilderness with his hawk bird friend. It's a forgettable wilderness coming of age story where everyone makes it out ok. The movie adaptation is memorable for having a hunter come out of nowhere to shoot the bird dead with no build up.


Yep, and I am still seething about it. At least, he gave me a good meme material by making Lady a racist cop

There was a Lupin the 3rd Live action movie that I'm sure was memoryholed to oblivion. Never watched it, but it looked terrible at first glance. Two of them exactly. The 1974 version and the 2014. Any Lupin fans here pitch in and tell how bad these adaptations are?
Off the top of my head, I believe I heard the first 70s one was shit and the 2000s one actually wasn't bad but I haven't seen it.
 
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