Jason Thor Hall / PirateSoftware / Maldavius Figtree / DarkSphere Creations / Maldavius / Thorwich / Witness X / @PotatoSec - Incompetent Furry Programmer, Blizzard Nepo Baby, Lies about almost every thing in his life, Industry Shill, Carried by his father, Hate boner against Ross Scott of Accursed Farms, False Flagger

[McSneaks]

Or just work on the update throughout the month instead of having to halfass something at the last second to the point of being a week late and having to change your update policy again.

Or even just do it at the beginning of the month so there's a minimum update already done in the first week, and then use the rest of the month to coast or fart around with some other minor shit.

Constantly procrastinating is a shit work ethic.

Or even better just work on the game normally and update it when it's naturally time instead of focusing on forcing yourself to squeeze out some random monthly change for the sole purpose of updating a text box on a website so new people aren't aware you're selling a big scam lol

"We]l chat, that's just how game development works, it's what we did for 20 years at blizzard. Steam didn't make me do it. But also it's a little unfair Steam makes me do this just so I can hide the fact my shit game is abandoned"

 

[Astro Galactic Megalul]

His name is Seethavius, Maldavius even.

Moldovan Faggot tree or something?

There's another clip where he says "QA isn't dev work"

"Sex work is work" kinda vibe. While competent QA is certainly valuable, saying it equates to people actually making the game is up there with community managers doing the same thing.

 

[Hakase Shinonome]

YAML is the format of choice for Bukkit plugin configuration and has been the defacto standard

Most unfortunate, yes. But don't you think elite-QA-haxxorman Mald, with his inane expertise in programming, should update his tools? Stubbornness? Refusal to accept new things? Appeal to tradition? Not being able to code, only being able to change lines in a file? Is that why he still brings up fucking paint every time he wants to prove a point? I'm sure that as someone at the elite, masterful, brilliant minds of DEFCON, he could figure something out.

Also, don't forget that this glorified settings file is 16 fucking kilobyes.

 

[R E T A R D E D]

<Snip>
Do keep in mind I've asked like 3 times in this thread for ANY shred of evidence of swatting, and most anyone had was him AFK on the day it supposedly happened. I haven't even seen a report of malicious police calls

So, disclaimer. Swatting is bad, no one should be swatted & if these claims are legitimate by Mald they should have the book thrown at them.

First off, give thanks to 50 euros note for archiving this because it helps a ton https://kiwifarms.net/threads/jason...wich-witness-x-potatosec.197757/post-20477322 - The claim here is that Pirate Software is most likely known to law enforcement for these "Swatting" efforts.

Now someone can correct me, but my knowledge is that the police have systems in place over the last 5 or so years with publicly exposed individuals to verify before going through with a swatting attempt. Now given previous instances, I can "technically" believe that this would happen. People can be fucking idiots online. However his whole history with this seems off. One thing that constantly surprises me with how he refers to these swatting attempts, is that you would imagine that 1 would be caught while streaming. However they always seem to never be on stream hours or on his day off.

Honestly, I'm unsure on how outside of Mald telling us that we would be able to gather any information to support or deny this claim. My only thinking could be a FOI request to perhaps the state/local police dept for bodycam footage, however thats work that someone else can figure out if they're solely inclined to follow up on that. I'm not in a position to investigate that route.

I haven't been back in this thread since February. The Managem arc was fantastic, I'm glad people are giving him shit for his doubling/tripling down on the Stop Killing Games.

 

[Der Fuhrry]

Since I'm struggling to understand how Mald can be a loose cannon (WoW) and an industry plant (SKG) at the same time I wrote a long "fanfic" about it.

Spoiler: the first click in the rest of malds life

I kinda get the WoW thing, him roaching and being a total ass about it.

But an industry plant would probably get orders from above to shut down that retarded drama shit immediately, issue a heartfelt apology, play that Stijn Heartbound song in the background you know the one I'm talking about, do whatever it takes, because we're bleeDING SUBS HERE YOU FUCKING RETARD.

But a plant probably wouldn't be playing WoW anyway, or do what Mald does. 12 hours of gaming and YAML every day. To each their own as they say, you do you, mald. A plant would likely be pushing some corpo agenda and is easily spotted and avoidable. That's the problem we're trying to solve here, guys!

Mald is more like a sleeper agent. He got a little push into stardom, and the only 2 times he's been activated has been the 2 SKG incidents. The rest was gaming and YAML.

But what compels him to wake up?

Money? I don't see it. If you suddenly have 1M subs, fake or not, you have a sustainable business I guess? Just don't fuck it up too much like future mald. But his SKG YT videos came before that, first one Aug 6 2024. I don't see any signs in the stats that his audience punished him for those videos. If anything, there's a temporary boost in twitch followers and viewers around that time? So unless they're paying him big bux this time... and yet... he feels more like a soldier than a slut if you know what I mean.

Is it The Gnome Tapes? Or any blackmail material, even just boring debt? As much as I'd love to believe it exists he never seems distressed, cornered, like someone with no options. I'd also think his leash holders would exploit him more often then.

Is it a long lasting friendship with someone in the industry? 20 years of exp and all that? No, narcs like him don't have friends, and friends don't ask friends to shill ok?

SO WTF IS IT? Why would an indie gamedev shill against game preservation?

Maybe it's gratitude towards someone for giving him 1M subs? Yeaa, we might be getting closer but I don't think it would last this long. And, "with respect," I've never seen mald show anyone gratitude. Or, he actually thanks people for voting for him at the Streamer Awards and his voice cracks up a bit. Or wait is it a tiny laugh?

No, my working theory is that he got hacked. He's a DEF CON regular. I hear it's full of live exploits, so don't connect anything you like to that wifi! But I don't think it's his computer that got hacked (welcome to the Gnome Tapes timeline bud). I think it was his mind.

So imagine a dude. Let's call him Theo. I have no evidence, but @Cantercoin said "Theo.gg looks like the type of guy who spikes women's drinks when they aren't looking" and I nodded, and besides they (mald, theprimeagen, theo, et al) have hung out in the past, so let's go with Theo. No relation.

Theo is, or becomes an unholy cross between a talent scout and a pickup artist, except he's looking for retards. People with actual mental problems. Exploitable people. Maybe some of his ideas -- Theo's an artist after all -- began when he worked at twitch (oh no I'm already confusing with the real Theo they look just alike) and he had that mentor who had a hobby studying cults or whatever.

Anyway Theo spots Mald and sees something in him -- Theo's an artist after all -- and Mald's the right stuff. The right retarded stuff. Maybe he starts off soft by humoring Mald at DEF CON. "It's amazing you've worked 20 years in the industry dude! For Blizzard! Wow dude!" (under his breath, "in QA *snigger*"). "Oh you stream gamedev! We're all devs here, come meet my friends, we could use another hand!".

Theo later shows him how to tweak mic settings to sound better on stream, and refers him to a clinic that can induce "second puberty". He feeds him stories and observes how they (even the retarded lies) end up in YT shorts without crediting Theo. "He's perfect...". At one point Mald says, "I should probably thank you for all you've done..", but Theo cuts him off, "Thor, don't mention it man. Besides, you're one of us now. A real hacker! *wink*". He senses mald longing for something ... more ... bigger. It's time. He calls up his old mentor from his days at twitch.

"Hi Kyle! What would you say if I told you I could sell you the opinion of a popular streamer without the streamer really realizing they're shilling for you? *unintelligible phone voice* Nonono, we're already IN phase 2. I'm coming over! Order Chinese! I'm hanging up!". And then they talked and schemed for hours, and they went into Kyle's bedroom and they made sweet gay love into the early morning.

Months later Mald receives a mysterious email with a plane ticket. Theo's been grooming him and telling him something might come up. Something big.

He goes on the trip. A driver picks him up at the airport. After an hour in the car Mald asks the driver, "How long until we get to his estate?", and the driver laughs, "We've been driving across his estate for the past 50 minutes!" (ok stole that one from Ex Machina (2014))

Mald arrives at the mansion and a charismatic older man comes out to greet him.

They talk in his office for less than 60 minutes. Thor feels very important and valued the entire time. Like everything's finally falling into place. He's offered a boost.

"No strings attached, except... I may from time to time... explain my point of view to you, influence the influencer if you will, perhaps even... correct certain misconceptions you may have. I'm interested in enlightening people to everyone's benefit after all. You see that don't you".

"Yeah". Long pause. Time stands still. Mald admires the man's fursuit.

"One million subs. It's a lot of responsibility but we're all counting on you. You think you can handle it, Thor?"

---

(I wanted to include an image here but my image uploads are corrupted/truncated. https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GwcFxTuMYmU/...j0AgKJD&rs=AOn4CLBF6vVUTVWQYd7Odg6sDqDWR0NQYQ)

 

[Spiral Architect]

At least Tommy Tallerico co-hosted a G4 show.

And mald's a youtuber. I'm noticing quiet a few similarities, like Guiness world records = defcon badges. It would be hilarious if Jason got labeled as the Tommy Tallarico of game development, but it seems like people already forgot about that clown.

 

[VF-1S Valkyrie]

Since I'm struggling to understand how Mald can be a loose cannon (WoW) and an industry plant (SKG) at the same time I wrote a long "fanfic" about it.

I don't think Mald is an industry plant in that sense of being a paid shill. I think he's a hardcore ballwasher, and simultaneously holds an extreme sense of tribalism for the sections of the industry he's stanning for, but is also bitter about not being a direct industry plant because his ego requires exceptional recognition for his loyalty. He wishes he was an industry plant.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

Do keep in mind I've asked like 3 times in this thread for ANY shred of evidence of swatting, and most anyone had was him AFK on the day it supposedly happened. I haven't even seen a report of malicious police calls

Someone needs to FOIA this nigger.
Whats his county?
I don't think we even need his name on it just to confirm if they received any swatting incidents on that day.
Some counties will even just have a generic report for the week telling you "This is what happened this week", but not say who it happened to just the areas it was in.

 

[StacticShock]

Is this better, on par with, or worse than Yanderedev's gorillion elseifs?

actually worse because yanderedev never claimed to have 20 years of experience and commit such a fucking retarded rookie mistake.

 

[potato sack]

i just came to realize, this niggeris in washington. i keep forgetting that
he streams from around midnight to noon WA time. the swatting could've happened during daytime hours

still, no proof, no evidence, farmers that are good at this coming up with zilch
a nigger that's fill of 'here's physical evidence to the thing i said' refusing to show even a doctored police report
i call fake still

 

[Slav Power]

what he says is correct but also incorrect at the same time
correct me if i'm wrong if you have a bank with a shitty website that doesn't support HTTPS for some reason and you absolutely have to use public wifi then vpn does have use but virtually all banks have websites that support HTTPS
if he was talking about VPNs again he would just say that VPNs are all completely useless even if you tell him it's good for OPSEC reasons

I already did a lengthy spergout about why Jason is a complete idiot when it comes to VPN's. Others have summarized it pretty well.

There are VPN services like Mullvad that are glorified proxies, a way to mask your public IP and bypass regional locks.
Then, there are VPN tunnels, the underlying tech that you can self-host for remote access or intranet networks, like joining multiple remote company locations over the Internet securely.

Jason only thinks of VPN's in the context of VPN services like Mullvad, and can't see why VPN's as a networking protocol can be good for security.

I hate the proliferation of that term among techboys.

Shut up, homelab is a fun term. I wouldn't call what I have a "home server", it's too amateur for that. A router, a switch, and a OptiPlex Micro. It's not a proper server rack and it's not properly built to be reliable and redundant, and I keep fucking with it when I'm bored. That's why it's a homelab and not a home server. You constantly fuck around with it, experiment and expand it without sticking to any sysadmin standards of how to build a server. The issue starts if you start huffing your own farts and acting like you're Mr. Bigshot for hooking up a PC to a network and not enjoying the fact that your hopscotch shitheap of random junk you've dug out of the junkyard works and runs.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

Does anyone have the fucking county he is in? I might have something but I need the county.
And I don't see it in the main post.
I checked the thread I found "Wayne" county but I don't even think that's a county in Washington

 

[PHUCKERPRIME]

I can already see corporate workarounds

Don't give them ideas. Jason reads this thread.

Speaking of reading the thread, I want to remind everyone that before the WoW drama, Jason tried to epically pwn the farms by spamming the thread with inconsequential shit about himself such as the sippy cups thing ("SIPPY CUPS?!?" it read) with accounts whose join dates were hours apart, framing himself as infantile because sippy cups are for babbies (and not concerning because you hang around people who would spike your drinks at your own house parties) and expecting the farms to latch on to it so he could say "SEE? THIS IS THE SHIT THEY ACCUSE ME OF. I AM MOST PIOUS."
His specialty as a narc is social engoneering and he sucks at it.

 

[The Stranger]

Does anyone have the fucking county he is in? I might have something but I need the county.
And I don't see it in the main post.
I checked the thread I found "Wayne" county but I don't even think that's a county in Washington

The Driftwood Ranch is in Pierce county

 

[The ATF Disliked That]

>1:11
>"You are wrong"
>20 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!
>MY ENTIRE CAREER!!!!!!!!
Yet, you still got it wrong. Embarrassing!

Yeah, he once again fails to mention basic security features that have been a thing for decades. Certs, the S in HTTPS, the fact that haxxorman isn't at your Starbucks holding a Access Point for you to sign into every single fucking day. Doesn't mention any way to protect from this supposed idiot-way of logging into public networks, like PGP-encryption, SSH-tunneling or custom-hosted VPNs. You'd think someone who regularly worked in QA and his "homelab" would know about SSH.

Man you went digging to bring this one back. I swear this guy only learned basic networking shit from 2001 and never bothered to catch up.

Also, him constantly bringing up DEFCON is fucking annoying at this point. The Wall of Sheep he brings up is for shit that was unencrypted. So this man literally thinks everything is unencrypted. Today, you might have people just do it for the fun of it just to see it work, but found a reddit thread, and everyone is saying it's a relic of what it was.

He clearly ignores MFA as well in his bank info argument. (assuming it's enabled)

I already did a lengthy spergout about why Jason is a complete idiot when it comes to VPN's. Others have summarized it pretty well.

Also, good spergout. Just did a VPN and SSH lab for school and yeah textbook pretty much debunks mald's shit and confirms everything in your post and literally what everyone else has said

Edit: removed county question because stranger beat me to it

 

[Not Yet Implemented]

If you wanted to be as charitable as possible, it is pretty common for laymen to use "the devs" to refer to literally everyone on a video game team. You go on a gaming forum you'll see statements like "why are the devs charging so much", "the devs cooked on these skins" when the software devs aren't setting prices or making assets. So you can be 'a dev' without doing 'dev work'

However, it is painfully fucking obvious that Jason tried to use the broad label of "QA" to make a manual testing (not dev work) position sound like an automated testing (real dev work) position

It's like he can only express himself via the motte-and-bailey fallacy. I've seen it in other people with grandiose narc tendencies.

found this, regarding swatting.

In that clip you linked, you can see him

1. Jump the gun with attribution of the "swatting"
2. Come up with a caricature of the modal SKG supporter ("nyehh my rights, first amendment" or something like that)
3. Spout the shitlib canned phrase for excusing corpo censorship ("First amendment is about the government censoring you" once again paraphrased)

You can see him doing in real time what someone a few pages ago said, that he starts taking the first thought that comes to his mind as gospel and then doubles down because narcissists hate having to save face. Or in this clip, I guess, takes the first insane idea and builds another layer of midwit insanity on top of it. I'm gonna hazard a guess: that he thinks like this and that his code is as it is aren't coincidences. Maybe it's not literally the same thing, but it's "literally" the same thing.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

https://blog.piercecountywa.gov/pcsdblotter/category/over-the-weekend/

The lucky faggot.
They used to do summaries of what went on during the weekend but stopped at the end of 2024.

https://spotcrime.com/WA/Pierce%20County/trends

There might be something in this. but it'll have to be dug through and it looks like it requires an account.
OF NOTE:

For some reason it stops at July 1st
There have been either no reports in the past 6 days (unlikely) or the site for some reason stopped reporting.
He has some incredible luck when it comes to this shit.

I'd need an account to get the rest and I cant be asked to sign up especially when its not showing past july 1st.

E2: Removing those as they appear to be fake ones that deleting the elements doesn't remove.


EDIT 3:

https://gisdata-piercecowa.opendata.arcgis.com/datasets/82ceb2e5c1794ef4ba9cd80699ef3536_1/explore

Edit 3: Disregard its only up to 6/29 we'll have to wait a few weeks.

 

[blargenheimer]

I'd caution against judging a parent-child-relationship based on a few public interactions, especially where both parties are aware there's an audience, and especially especially if there's reason to suspect one of them is a narcissist.

That being said, I don't think Jason's been fucked up the ass by his dad or anything like it. I'd think it's more likely his father, if because of his ''tism or whatever other reason, was extremely self-absorbed and never meaningfully fulfilled or even recognized any of Jason's emotional needs.
What looks like "instilling an appreciation for nerd stuff" could be a subconscious pattern of "if I do X and prove I'm Y, my dad will finally care about me".

Jason seems exactly like someone whose mom left and whose dad could barely be bothered to heat up some canned Mac&Cheese in-between WoW sessions.

You're not wrong, his dad could be just as narcissistic as he is, he could even be a breastmilk drinking weirdo, it's just masked by not being a terminally online millennial faggot or perhaps he received the belt as a kid and knows how to act, but I don't think that discounts that given their similarities Thor probably had an alright childhood, bonded over video games, continued living at home with him well into adulthood, and that an abundance of attention without anything negative to balance it is what fucked him up. Like any entitled rich brat. Still subconscious neglect, but a different kind. In contrast, lack of attention would probably lead to lower self-worth, but I'm no psychologist.

For some reason it stops at July 1st
There have been either no reports in the past 6 days (unlikely) or the site for some reason stopped reporting.
He has some incredible luck when it comes to this shit.

Possibly called in as a suicide threat at 8:06 AM, which...lol.
No actual offenses reported at the same location, just that call and two follow-ups (10:11 "Solved on Arrival", 12:12 "Supplemental Report")

https://public.tableau.com/app/prof...PoliceCrimeDashboard/CrimeDashboard-IntroPage

 

[Slimpacks]

A quick reminder that Animus is a 3rd chapter of the game out of the planned 5
And at the moment is like 6 years in development. Previous 2 chapters took him like 3 years to do.
This nigga will never finish a game. And i don't think he wants to. The only reason he still "works" on it is to not give people ammunition against him.

His cope is that one of the parts isn't required for the game and will be released as like a dlc later, and that the last chapter is much easier to make. According to Mald, the reason animus is taking so long to finish is because this chapter has very deep personal connections and it's very hard to implement that.

(source)
If anyone wants to compare, there's a post with clips of him showing this exact spreadsheet over the years (Link)

I am really confused on where these 16-32 routes are. The game is about 3 hours long.

He was asked this question during his live stream. He counts any difference in character interactions as a unique route. Sometimes you get to see a unique animation (2:12).

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

Possibly called in as a suicide threat at 8:06 AM, which...lol.

I got his address in the thread when I searched Driftwood. I posted it in my original post.
Sadly the site I found that really looks like it works great only goes up to 6/29 we'll have to wait a bit.