Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[Ruined by the Rain]

Don't argue with me, woman, crochet pooners exist alongside tomboy pooners.

There's ten hyper feminine pooners to one tomboy pooner

 

[gaysexenjoyer]

Each one a waste and a tragedy.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

transgender dude with schizophrenia here

. If you've felt trans for as long as you remember, it's probably not a delusion.

"I'm schizophrenic - I'm not delusional!"

And her psychiatrist is either a faggot or a Pooner.

 

[Kujo Jotaro]

I think we should have some kind of top of the page reminder for all stinkditch threads that men are creeped out the most by trans men and women are creeped out the most by trans women, because it's you that they're skinwalking.

I'm not creeped out by pooners, I just find them more interesting than troons.

See the MtF troon threads are funny, this shit is just sad.
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"When a man goons too hard and troons out it's a comedy; when a woman goons too hard and poons out it's a tragedy "

Bro really said "I only have sympathy for people I want to fuck."

It never ceases to amaze me that nearly everyone in society default treats grown women like children who can't possibly be responsible for their own actions.

Yes, some troons do some stupidly funny shit, so do some poons, and I wont lie I do laugh at them, but for the most part I just feel bad for them. Try extending sympathy to human beings instead of things you want to crawl into bed with.

 

[gaysexenjoyer]

I'm not creeped out by pooners, I just find them more interesting than troons.

"When a man goons too hard and troons out it's a comedy; when a woman goons too hard and poons out it's a tragedy "

Bro really said "I only have sympathy for people I want to fuck."

It never ceases to amaze me that nearly everyone in society default treats grown women like children who can't possibly be responsible for their own actions.

Yes, some troons do some stupidly funny shit, so do some poons, and I wont lie I do laugh at them, but for the most part I just feel bad for them. Try extending sympathy to human beings instead of things you want to crawl into bed with.

I date men you dolt.

 

[Kujo Jotaro]

I date men you dolt.

Then why are troons funny but poons not retard?

 

[gaysexenjoyer]

Then why are troons funny but poons not retard?

I dunno, it just doesn't reach the same so-pathetic-it's-funny threshold for me as often.

I can say with certainly it's not because I hunger for pooner snatch or some shit, though. Go project that retarded fantasy on someone else.

 

[Ruined by the Rain]

Bro really said "I only have sympathy for people I want to fuck."

>Username is gaysexenjoyer

Then why are troons funny but poons not retard?

I find poons more horrifying than troons. Troons are standard cumbrained male antics you can observe since forever but poons introduced me to new manmade horrors

 

[Kujo Jotaro]

>Username is gaysexenjoyer

I find poons more horrifying than troons. Troons are standard cumbrained male antics you can observe since forever but poons introduced me to new manmade horrors

I've had lesbians insist to me that they are also gay.

I dunno, it just doesn't reach the same so-pathetic-it's-funny threshold for me as often.

I can say with certainly it's not because I hunger for pooner snatch or some shit, though. Go project that retarded fantasy on someone else.

"Ehrm, you're projecting!"

Nigga really couldn't come up with a retort.

 

[gaysexenjoyer]

"Ehrm, you're projecting!"

Unironically yes. Nothing in my original message even hinted at the reason behind why I have different feelings towards the different threads being because I want to fuck the trannies in this one. You invented that in your own little head then accused me of it.

I don't think women are innocent little daffodils with no agency nor do I think pooning out isn't okay because awooga cocky want boing boing. I just don't find the pooner thread as funny as the trooner threads, at least not as often. Just because I have a different emotional reaction to something doesn't magically give you insight into my sexual life, Dr. Freud.

 

[DYLAN ‘DIELAWN’ VOLK]

Then why are troons funny but poons not retard?

Some troons are sad. Most poons are sad. The saddest ones are the kids.
But I don't care if some greasy cum brained retard that I know wants to be me cuts his dick off anymore. All we can do is laugh.

 

[Kujo Jotaro]

Unironically yes. Nothing in my original message even hinted at the reason behind why I have different feelings towards the different threads being because I want to fuck the trannies in this one. You invented that in your own little head then accused me of it.

I don't think women are innocent little daffodils with no agency nor do I think pooning out isn't okay because awooga cocky want boing boing. I just don't find the pooner thread as funny as the trooner threads, at least not as often. Just because I have a different emotional reaction to something doesn't magically give you insight into my sexual life, Dr. Freud.

Clearly you're unaware that horny men on the internet posted constantly about tomboys for years; this meme was created during the peak of that era. This meme is about being sad that the tomboy will no longer be attractive to them.

So yes, I did have a reason to assume you want to fuck them.

 

[fat_rat_on_the_grass]

Not to absolve these psychos of any sins but I guess what hes saying is theres often an element of sexual trauma/assault going on in some of these cases, though the same can be argued for gay men (who become trannies? mtf) due to the statistics involving that. Its a WHOLE can of worms. A lot of these people have been stunted irreversably and have some demented emotional regulation (do not feel sorry for them, they still have agency) There will always be a sad element to these threads, especially if you look deep enough at some of the cases, but that does not take away the utter insanity and fucked up social bullshit they are forcing everybody to be fine with. You can find it sad and still laugh at the really deranged pooners. If you cannot, go to another thread for your own sake because they will always be a source of mockery and annoyance.

 

[Magic Pickle]

Jellybean boy: a FTM is anxious that other people have been rightfully guessing that she's a pooner behind her back, which she describes makes her feel like "a jelly bean jar and everyone just wants to know if they’ve guessed the right amount." Those of gendershit persuasion always seem alarmed to find out that there's more speculation to their sex than they expect, which is hilarious because this chick is self-described as "baby-faced" and 5'6". REMEMBER: You are never as unclockable as you think you are!
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I feel like I was outted?​

For context, I am an undergraduate college student. And for the summer, I have an on campus job (pretty much took the job because housing and dining is free for the summer).
It’s still a job that, objectively, is competitive and that a lot of people on campus apply to. It’s pretty demanding, and you have a lot of responsibility.
But for whatever reason, it seems that a massive chunk of the other students working this job are queer.
So, a few days ago, a group of us were kicking it—drinking, talking. And, someone starts talking about how everyone at this job seems like they’re either gay or bi.
At this point, one of the guys (who is bi and is very open about that)—he starts saying to this room of 7 people (that were just all starting to get to know). He says “[NAME], honestly—I don’t know if this is better or worse, but for a while I thought you could be a trans guy.”
My throat fell all the way into my ass. I was a little toasty, and I didn’t know what to do, and I felt like shit. And I felt kind of backed into a corner. So I ended up telling everyone in this room that I was trans—something I really didn’t want to do.
At this point, one of the few cis straight guys (who I’ve actually been the closest with and who was hosting us all in his dorm)—he tells me that one of the other guys on the team (also a gay guy) said that he thought I was trans. And that my friend just shoved it away and was like “nah” and just…I guess generally thought it was a weird thing for this guy to say.
Now, I really don’t tell anyone. I don’t think it’s anyone’s business—I only tell people that I really truly care about and that I think are going to be in my life for a while.
This past school year, I told my 3 roommates who have literally become my best friends. And they all took it great (one was really confused and had to be walked through it—he’s definitely never met a trans person before—but he’s been so supportive and, honestly, a good ally).
Now, when you imagine my friends—you can picture “stereotypical” frat boys. They’re all straight, backwards hat-wearing, beer die-playing, bros. And yeah—toxic masculinity is a thing and a lot of “frat type” guys are the worst. But these guys have genuinely been the greatest allies.
I just… feel so isolated and disconnected. I mean, for one—how the fuck are these people clocking me? Like, most people are surprised if I tell them, and I thought I passed pretty well. But I guess not. I’m short (5’6”) and have a bit of a baby face—but so do so many other college guys?
Like, all these people just sitting there thinking I might be trans and wondering if they’re right—it feels like I’m a racehorse to bet on.
Anyway, it’s one of those things that reminds me why I kind of avoid LGBT spaces. And that sounds bad, but I feel like some of the worst people I’ve encountered concerning trans topics are gay people. Partially, I think it’s because they think they get it, when they don’t. Partially, it’s because I think they think they can’t say anything hurtful because they’re gay.
Idk. I just need to be heard rn. I’ve been self isolating and just… feeling like a freak. And I can’t tell if I’m overacting, but I feel like I’m not being treated like a person—I’m being treated like a jelly bean jar and everyone just wants to know if they’ve guessed the right amount.

A post-op poon feels resentment towards a coworker who was putting a stranger's short husband on blast, huffing and puffing about why we can't simply "call out shitty people for being shitty" instead of bodyshaming, which is an extremely female take of her to have. Maybe she feels particularly sensitive about jokes about undesirable men given that she claims she had anterolateral thigh phalloplasty (ALT) and wound up with a rotdog self-described as "5"-5.5" for girth and 5.5" length"?
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Table of coworkers laughing at the concept of short men​

Last week, a coworker "Jennifer" was telling a story about someone's "ugly" husband. Why was he unattractive? "He was barely 5'4"! That's so embarrassing!" Then 4 coworkers laughed alongside Jennifer while I just sat there, debating whether I tell her to stfu about other people's bodies for things they can't control or if I should stay silent and pretend to be confused. I almost asked her what's wrong with being 5'4" and mentioning that I'm exactly that height, but tbh I don't think empathy is a familiar concept for her, and she seemed like she'd be excited to throw a drink or throw hands.

Idk if this is an unpopular opinion, but it's so frustrating when people (often cis women, from what I've personally seen) make short jokes or small penis jokes about men they dislike, whether it's on a personal level or celebrities & politicians. I just don't think it's funny to emasculate men or put someone's masculinity on blast, and the added layer of transphobia doesn't feel great ) Why can't we just call out shitty people for being shitty instead of taking cheap shots at someone's weight, height, or body parts? So fckin annoying.

Another genre of FTM post that I enjoy is when they get riotously pissed that they are disrespected by both normal people and troons. Yes, normal women will despise you for being one of the most aggressive kinds of horizontally misogynist of women, and it's a no-brainer that men of all stripes would find you laughable at best and an insolent little worm stepping out of place at worst. But such is the fate of the handmaiden: the boots you lick shall always be content to step on your neck once you're done cleaning them.
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Trans men have miniscule privilege.​

TW for community transphobia
I am so sick and tired of people calling trans men privileged and complicit in the patriarchy to shut us up when we try to open up discussions on our struggles and need for support. At most, the privileges we experience are surface level and depend entirely on whether or not we pass. Even then, there are plenty of exceptions and the moment it comes down to discussions on sex and trans rights our "privilege" is meaningless.
As long as we live under a patriarchy, society will operate on the idea that binary sex = binary genders. Trans men do not fit into that binary, we as well as all trans people inherently go against the binary by just existing. Therefore, a trans man cannot ever have the same level of privilege and power as a cis man. If we were seen as genuine equals to cis men by society at large, that would mean the gender-sex binary, the heart of the patriarchy, no longer exists.
We aren't evil for transitioning, we aren't evil for performing healthy and positive masculinity, we aren't evil for being men. We aren't putting women down by voicing our oppression. Yeah, it's frustrating when a trans guy talks about his oppression over someone voicing theirs the same way it's frustrating when someone starts making things about themselves while you're sharing something personal, but that is not every single trans man and that is not the context in which we bring up our oppression every single time. Even then, trans men do not have the power, influence, or numbers to do any actual harm by whining. It's just an annoyance when some of us do that at the absolute worst.
I feel like a lot of people confuse "talking over" with "speaking with" too, there's a huge fucking difference. If we're talking about how there's a huge lack of medical research on afab bodies that leads to us getting serious issues ignored and undiagnosed, it isn't talking over women to say "This is how I've been failed too". If we're talking about the increase in anti trans legislation across the world, it isn't talking over transfems for me to say "This is how I'm suffering right now too."
Why is it crazy and wrong to vocalize our struggles to people who claim to be allies or claim to be in our community. Are you not ironically enough using patriarchal bioessentialist rhetoric in reducing men to the strong, powerful abuser and the women to the weak, innocent victim? We literally just want support, that is it. We want our community and allies to truly, sincerely see us and support us.

Fellas, how do you navigate telling your kids that you're a degenerate TiF? Thankfully, the brothers of r/FTMover30 have some advice for this!
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Older kids- does anyone here have older kids, teenagers and if so how did you approach telling them you were trans?​

Spoiler: One of them includes lying to a little girl about going to Hell!

Exactly-180degrees
I don't have older kids. But my niece was 5 when I transitioned and we were very close at the time. Her dad is a drug addict and absent, so I tried to fill in and help my sister as best as I could. When I decided to transition I sat down with her and asked her if she knew how to tell a boy from a girl. And she said, "they'll usually just tell you or you can tell a man has a beard and a big nose and a lady has boobs and a big butt. Without going into too much technical stuff, I told her that sometimes babies are born in the wrong "body" (I would probably choose a different word now, since this is really oversimplified and not entirely correct, but that's the way I chose to do it 20 years ago. Being 5 and very sweet, she said "that must feel terrible for them." I told her I was one of those babies and that I did feel very sad and not at all comfortable in my body ever. She asked me if they (pretty sure she meant a doctor of some kind here)....can fix your body to be right. And I told her yes, and that's what I'm working on now. I explained that it will take a while, and she may notice changes in my personality and sometimes the way I look, but if she ever had a question she could ask me and Id do my best to explain. She agreed and started calling me uncle immediately. I also told her that this was a "family matter" and for now, we shouldn't discuss it with anyone outside our family because it might not be a safe place to talk about it. My therapist told me to avoid using "secret" or "just between you and me", these are buzzwords for grooming. Secret can imply scary/bad/something shameful, and normal adults don't have secrets with children. She once asked me what the word was for a girl who dates another girl. I said girlfriend, same as boyfriend is for a girl that dates a boy. She asked me if it was wrong for girls to date girls and if that was why I was a boy now, because I like to date girls? I told her that she is going to be "attracted" to lots of people in her life. Some of those people will turn out to be friends, some might be partners. I said you may know why you're attracted to them or it might take some figuring out if they're a friend or a lover, but no feeling that is loving and caring and respectful is ever "wrong". Even if the other person is not attracted to you. They may turn out to be a best friend (like the woman I lived with at the time and who was my first "out" girlfriend ever). She said that her friend "" can't remember the little girls name now, said that people who marry the same sex as they are are called homos and they're all going to hell because Jesus said so. I think she was 10 or 11 at the time. I told her to tell "" that's NOT what Jesus said, and that she shouldn't try to decide where anyone is going because the bible says god will send you there too! I hope that little shit was scared to death and never said the word homo again.

imaginary_labyrinth
I have two teens. One of them is queer, as well. They have various queer and trans friends. They have internet access, go to public school, have watched various films about trans people, and I have always been open to talking with them about the community and being supportive. I took them to two Pride events this year. I haven't told them I'm trans and transitioning. I don't have to. They'll figure it out. Their generation knew about trans people when they were in elementary school... way before my generation figured it out.

Speaking of kids and transition, is it fucked up if OP wants to pretend to her future nieces and nephews that she has always been a real boy and gaslight them about her biological reality? It's Reddit, of course they're going to say it's fine! Knowing how many people are not blessed to have families to call their own, it's amazing how willingly troons 'n' poons set aflame their own lineages just to chase after their own egos.
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WIBTA if I wanted to remain stealth to new kids in my family?​

Pretty much a pure hypothetical situation, but on that might become reality. And I‘m generally interested in your thoughts

I (19M) have a brother (28M) who has a girlfriend. They‘ve been together quite long and I can imagine they will have a kid in the future.

I‘m stealth. I‘m somewhat good with my parents and brother, not so good with my grandparents who still misgender me.

If my brother had a kid, I would want to remain stealth to it. Kids run their mouth and I don’t need my brother’s social environment knowing about me because his kid got wind of it. Also, I‘d just wanna be the fun gay uncle.

But I‘m worried that either my brother himself or the rest of my family would think it immoral. They‘re nice enough but not even to the point of even having a reaction when I get misgendered.

So, question A) is it okay to stay stealth inside your family? Question B) How to behave if your family outs you anyways?

Spoiler: I'd love to be a fly on the wall for some of these family reunions.

koala3191
Did this with my cousins (functionally nieces and nephews age wise) and all my in-laws. Works fine so long as family is on board which mine was. Don't ever plan on telling them. My medical business is private.

But make sure anyone who does know keeps their mouth shut. Ppl love to gossip about us but if you make it clear it's life and death for you and their relationship with you will disappear if they out you, that should help.

> Nightflame_The_Wolf [OP]
Yeah, the „cutting off“ thing would be something I should tell them, but they would never ever understand life or death. They would outright deny it. And call me unreasonable, paranoid and unwell for both that and the cutting off boundary.

But worth a try anyway. Thanks!

trash_pandaa19
Got the same plan tbh. Don't have any siblings, but I do have a little cousin who's almost 2. I don't want them to know I'm trans, so I've been making sure to bind around them etc, just in case there's a subconscious view on my gender forming already idk if my aunt and uncle refer to me as a guy to them (50/50 chance I'd say, since they're both more conservative-ish and I've heard some stuff from them that's not necessarily transphobic, but also not exactly trans-friendly so yeah). Been on T for 7 months, so I'm hoping that'll help kiddo gender me correctly lmaoo

So yeah, there's nothing wrong with doing that at all imo

AbrocomaMundane6870
This is my plan aswell, but in on the extreme end of the spectrum. My family knows i have no problems packing my stuff and moving countries if that's what it takes to stay stealth. So i'd imagine if they outed me they would be making a conscious choice to never see me again

Finally, I'd love to know what everyone thinks of the fine feathered FTMs of r/FTMpassing. What are we thinking? Would you want these doodz in bathrooms with your womenfolk?

Spoiler: The number of teenagers on this sub made me depressed.

 

[Mad_Dog]

It never ceases to amaze me that nearly everyone in society default treats grown women like children

I mean

 

[The Wise Shaman]

I had an elementary school reunion with a few of my former classmates a few days ago (I haven't talked to any of them for 6 years) and I suddenly remembered the girl in my class who was into this trans ideology garbage back then already. I asked my classmates about her there since she (luckily) didn't attend our reunion and they told me she pooned out for a short time. We talked about her a little, mainly mocking her for her insane antics, not just for being a pooner. One of the girls there was even confused about her sexuality, asking "Is she gay or straight now?" The funniest part was that she chose a name most commonly associated with uneducated rural folks/peasants in Hungary. One of the worst names you could ever give yourself, only beaten by names associated with gypsies. I didn't feel sorry for her at all; her entire family is full of insane and insufferable people.

At least we had fun being openly transphobic.

Edit: I just remembered she was a big weeaboo too (the edgy kind) and you could make her REALLY upset by praising SpongeBob and Family Guy. I think I've found just the physical embodiment of tranime!

 

[Izdaja Slika]

And I can’t tell if I’m overacting, but I feel like I’m not being treated like a person—I’m being treated like a jelly bean jar and everyone just wants to know if they’ve guessed the right amount.

They're not trying to guess the number of jelly beans, luv. They're wondering who the fuck got a jar of jelly beans and labelled it 'gummy snakes'.

She asked me if it was wrong for girls to date girls and if that was why I was a boy now, because I like to date girls? I told her that she is going to be "attracted" to lots of people in her life.

So you lied to her because you couldn't admit you're a lezza, and worse, you just threw your asexual/aromantic brethren under the bus, sister!

I took them to two Pride events this year. I haven't told them I'm trans and transitioning. I don't have to. They'll figure it out. Their generation knew about trans people when they were in elementary school... way before my generation figured it out.

"So mum, when are you going to cut your tits off? Everyone in our friend group is asking".

So, question A) is it okay to stay stealth inside your family? Question B) How to behave if your family outs you anyways?

You've obviously had years of being a narcissist delusionista practice. I'm sure you'll think of something.

 

[Comp0site Specter]

Pooner goes on a rant about how if you think trans men can't be lesbians that you're a TERF. She also goes on to say that actual queer people understand gender and sexuality on levels that "cis" people probably don't yet
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I’ve expressed to people in the past that trans doesn’t make any sense, is an inconsistent ideology, etc. The response to this (when it isn’t blind rage) is often condescending assurance that because I’m “cis”, of course it doesn’t make sense to me. This is one thing I can't stand about this community. They get off on authority and the perception that they are experts, along with snidely lecturing others and making them feel stupid. Its the sheer narcissism in thinking they have all the answers and have super unique brains that can understand gender and we're all a bunch of idiots who haven't understand it yet.

Every now and again my brain comes to the conclusion that all of this ideology is just nihilism. If anything can be everything under any context, than nothing ever actually means anything.

 

[AnOminous]

Pooner goes on a rant about how if you think trans men can't be lesbians that you're a TERF. She also goes on to say that actual queer people understand gender and sexuality on levels that "cis" people probably don't yet

They're literally too dumb to understand what a boy is and what a girl is. They don't understand stuff tiny babies and even animals understand.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

It never ceases to amaze me that nearly everyone in society default treats grown women like children who can't possibly be responsible for their own actions.

*cough*BeautyParlor*cough*