Artcow Ellen Woodbury / Pizzacake / Pizzacakecomic - A 40 year old webcomic artist, mother, porn star, misandrist, dramacow and Reddit celebrity. Threatens to sue her critics and cuckolds her husband. Female Andrew Dobson.

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

For me periods were mentioned as something can start sometime within this time window. I think girls already know that they're going to get boobs and curves during puberty. I would be so mad if periods were a surprise. I think we also went over how you'll start to need deodorant and bras but it happens at different times for everyone. Just practical stuff (so gross that troons fetishize this boring but important information)

I scanned her old reddit and found some relevant stuff.

Unless she really wanted to lie about this and remembered to keep the lie up, this is very likely truth.

Other stuff I found relevant but doesn't mention periods directly.

I'm very sure she was a farm kid, she's said she's grown up on a farm before. I'd rather hear about that from her tbh.

Tracks.

"It's rape I GUESS"

 

[Grand Duke Snowfall]

Huh, good to see that 2015 Ellen is bewildered by the thought that men can be raped. That attitude does not seem to have changed much in 10 years.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

Okay, watch Velma and come back.

Ellen is being terminally online again.

 

[WonderWino]

Ellen's daughter: *mentions periods*
Ellen: YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I WENT THROUGH! ONCE I BLED THROUGH MY PANTS ON A PLANE! AND AT WORK I NEEDED A PAD AND THERE WAS NO WAY TO GET ONE! YOU'RE HURTING MY FEELINGS!

Ellen is so narcissistic. I bet when her daughter got her period she just whined about how her first period was worse in every way.

This private information is unavailable to guests due to policies enforced by third-parties.

Edit: Reread Ellen's period post and I have a few questions. Do they not start sex ed in mid elementary school like here in the US? That's why it's so early.

You watch a puberty video that tells you what will happen and why. When I got my period I wasn't scared. I thought the ignorance around periods was linked to outdated beliefs (too gross for women to talk about, wait for your child to flip out and then wordlessly hand them a pad) or lack of education. Girls can think they're suffering internal bleeding (in a way, yes?) or dying if they're told nothing.

Was Ellen part of a hyperreligious sect that made her parents keep her out of sex ed? I kept wondering.

Planes just suck. A friend had to pee, the plane was delayed due to weather. They were on the ground but not allowed to leave their seat so they had to hold it for an hour. I personally prefer period cups. If any men here don't know, you can't hold in a period.

Yeah they absolutely start sex ed in mid elementary school in canada and schools will absolutely provide tampons and pads to students who require them. That aside, she's acting like she doesn't understand everything she is ranting like a loon about could be solved by simply bringing some tampons or pads with her for these situations. You know, like every other woman on the planet who figured that out when they were teens

She isn't from any kind of hyper religious family. By her own admission she was raised in rural nova scotia. She wants people to think that means being raised on some kind of farm, when that is very rarely the case and is definitely not the case with her. Something like 60% of the population of nova scotia live in rural areas. Very few on actual farms and of those few even fewer are on actual functional farms that do any farming. Tons of people just buy old farms to have land and don't do shit with it. You can bet her family falls under that situation. As usual, she's being manipulative and lying through her teeth to try to push her own looney bs

Rural nova scotia has some of the trashiest people you'll ever meet, as in the kind of deadbeat parents who live off seasonal welfare and are drunk off their asses in the off season and let their kids do whatever, leading to a big issue in the province with women ending up skanky as fuck, drinking moonshine, smoking and fucking anybody for cigs, weed or booze by the time they're 14. Then goes on to drop out of high school, get a GED and work as a cashier at walmart. Or cheat their way through the shittiest, easiest program they can find at the local community college and try to either fuck off out west or latch on to some guy who makes good money either in province or that fucks off to alberta frequently to work. I'll bet good money ellen was one of those. Explains everything about her behavior and personality. Especially the resentment. She isn't where she thought and expected she'd be in life at all at this point. So now she makes shitty comics and does trashy and very questionable porn on the internet for attention and to prove she's totally somebody who always gets what she wants and should absolutely be taken seriously for everything she does. Just like every good narcissist. Its what she flips her shit when shes called on it or doesn't get the reaction she expects. Its also why shes so over the top looney threatening to sic the cops on people and sue for not giving in to her demands

That said, since ellen wants to reeee about tampons lately I figure she should take a lesson from this:

She needs to chill the fuck out and change her tampon if its such a big problem for her. The cartoon tampon is clearly smarter than she is

 

[Conservative Constructor]

Spoiler: Another Patreon picture

View attachment 7336809

However, that first picture was uploaded on April 24, 2023, so she was living in that duplex with her family until relatively recently.

Hey, I just watched BasedifTrue’s videos on her since it was a YouTube recommendation. Anywho, this son of a bitch is such a piece of shit. I don’t like Nova Scotia besides in federal elections it’s always red and very left leaning, which doesn’t help its case. It’s a shitty province, plus Ellen Woodbury lives there, which makes it even more retarded. Goddamn, I hate Canada, it's a shit show.

I downloaded the image of Ellen Woodbury nude in just an apron, uploaded it to ChatGPT, and created two images here using that same pic. You can see them in the spoilers. Just messing around with ChatGPT’s AI Image Generator.

Spoiler: Image 1

Spoiler: Image 2

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

Very, VERY informative post. That should get highlighted.

I wonder how much she's making shit up. She's very tall so she may have been the first one in her class to get her period.

Ellen is autistic. Maybe she was hyperfocused and had no idea she was getting it, or just wrote it off as stomach cramps. I think the worst scenario would be if other kids notice the period stain first. Second worst would be the teacher noticing and sending you to the nurse. I think that's the right way for the teacher to do it, I'd just be very embarrassed in hindsight that the teacher saw my period stain.

Why not tell the actual traumatic story for pity if it exists? I'm thinking it was something like....

Spoiler: The lame probable truth

*Ellen gets up to sharpen pencil during math class*
"Uh, you need to go to the nurse. Here's a pass."
Awesome, this shit is so boring!

Edit: grammar

 

[Lurkey Turkey]

Not wanting to be preached to = redneck.

So intellectually inferior to those enlightened viewers who watch Marvel shows.

 

[Free the Pedos]

I would be shocked if they didn’t have tampons in every corner store and gas station in Canada. They do in the US. And is it even legal for your boss to make you go three hours without a bathroom break? That’s a long time for normal people, let alone old dudes, pregnant women, etc. She makes up these ridiculous scenarios and then gets mad about them.

 

[Señora Airi]

View attachment 7634597
Ellen is being terminally online again.

Better than either feigning to care about the men's emotions, constantly interrupting the man with "well women have it worse", or leaving you for another while saying "you've changed".

 

[The Hardest R]

Unless she really wanted to lie about this and remembered to keep the lie up, this is very likely truth.

It’s not a particularly deep or complex story so I don’t see how her mentioning it every once in a while is some major feat that requires her to meticulously stay on top of all her lies.

I would be shocked if they didn’t have tampons in every corner store and gas station in Canada. They do in the US. And is it even legal for your boss to make you go three hours without a bathroom break? That’s a long time for normal people, let alone old dudes, pregnant women, etc. She makes up these ridiculous scenarios and then gets mad about them.

She lives in Canada, a modern secular state. It was even that way back in the 1990s and 2000s when she started getting periods. Maybe if she didn’t constantly lie about anything and everything, I’d give her the benefit of the doubt. This is something she’d especially lie about so I just don’t believe her.

 

[Luke’s Missing Hand]

View attachment 7634598
Okay, watch Velma and come back.
View attachment 7634597
Ellen is being terminally online again.

She edited it…


Ironic coming from the bitch that’d 404 if asked ”what is a woman?”

 

[AnOminous]

School didn't even talk about the period until like... high school? It was mentioned but sex ed out here just talked basic anatomy. If the period was mentioned, it was just a brief "you'll bleed once a month" with no further info.

How are they not teaching about periods when they have time to teach homosexual fisting and felching?

 

[Señora Airi]

View attachment 7635097
Ironic coming from the bitch that’d 404 if asked ”what is a woman?”

constantly interrupting the man with "well women have it worse

Case in point.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

I am going to say that little kids should not be shown sex positions. Here's my sex ed experience in a blue state. Not going to doxx my own age but I'm a young adult.

Elementary school:
Coed portion: Health advice. Eat your vegetables and stay active. Women have one less rib than men because they need the extra stomach space for pregnancy.
Girls-only. Hygiene advice for puberty. We also had to watch a video defining child abuse like physical neglect, emotional neglect, physical abuse vs. sexual abuse.

Middle school:
We all got to see genital diagrams. We learned how penis in vagina is sex and everyone was grossed out. They briefly went over STDs and said that you can get it with genital fluids entering your body from any hole. Eyes, butt, mouth...and said that you don't want to have your parents find out you have penis germs in your mouth. We also briefly went over hygiene.

In the next grade, the new content was them telling us how you don't want to be a teen parent and the financial strains of babies. We also watched a video of a live birth.

High school:
Pictures of STDs. Very fucking gross. The only other thing I remember was them mentioning that many teenagers don't stay abstinent and that it's important to be informed.

Overall note: The girl only sections got far shorter and for good reason. Most girls have gotten their period by high school. At some point we went over flawed contraceptive ideas but I honestly can't remember if that was middle or high school.

I've heard about bad shit conservative sex ed teaches but I don't think there's any way Ellen could miss their period curriculum.

Spoiler: Continued sperg

Randomly remembering how in high school they told us not to have sex just because you don't want your period. My teacher said it most often happened in Catholic families who are misinformed. I don't know how to unpack THAT lmao.

 

[Elderly beef taco]

How are they not teaching about periods when they have time to teach homosexual fisting and felching?

This was like... over a decade ago. In a very religious town. I doubt they ever changed that curriculum either.

I think grade 11 was when the high school taught us any actual info, including a 1980s video about how they do pap tests and stuff. They still split the boys and girls up for it at that grade.

 

[AnOminous]

This was like... over a decade ago. In a very religious town. I doubt they ever changed that curriculum either.

I think grade 11 was when the high school taught us any actual info, including a 1980s video about how they do pap tests and stuff. They still split the boys and girls up for it at that grade.

I just think the priorities are super fucked up whether you're in Woke World or the Bible Belt. Not even a religious prude but I think no "sex education" is complete without even mentioning abstinence as a nearly perfect way not to end up with an STD or becoming a teenage mother.

I don't mean "abstinence-only" bullshit, but it appears a lot of curricula don't even mention it and by its absence almost seem to encourage reckless behavior.

 

[The Hardest R]

I just think the priorities are super fucked up whether you're in Woke World or the Bible Belt. Not even a religious prude but I think no "sex education" is complete without even mentioning abstinence as a nearly perfect way not to end up with an STD or becoming a teenage mother.

I don't mean "abstinence-only" bullshit, but it appears a lot of curricula don't even mention it and by its absence almost seem to encourage reckless behavior.

Yeah, the mindset of “they’re probably are going to have sex so might as well give them the facts” has turned into tutorials to prepare your asshole for an all-night, all-anal train. If you object to this, you are every -ist and -phobe in the book. After all, some kid might do that so we gotta teach it to everyone, just to be sure.

 

[SparklyFetuses]

Pizzacakecomic got its own review on BWW (Archive)

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

From the background of her area, it's likely she's been the town bicycle a long time. Ellen has been smoking even longer. No wonder she's upset about her looks on her old reddit account. Remove the Facetune and you might just see not only a middle aged woman's face, but a sagging granny face.

Ellen met Jeff while she was living with her mom. No doubt her mother gave her advice like "find a good man and settle down". Ellen is legitimately a slut so of course she disagreed. But she could pretend to be chaste until marriage. It's like she reverse baby-trapped Jeff.

The rumor about her sleeping with the boss for the job is almost certainly true. I bet she interviewed, got declined, but interrupted with "what if I add my pussy to the deal?" and got the job.

 

[Dr. Butt]

Small correction for Ellen since I know she reads the thread: The third panel should say "scholarship," not "student loan."

In Canada I think they can't get student loans (those come from the government there) if they're under a certain age and the family income is too high. Her comic makes sense but only for the segment of the population who didn't finish high school with high enough marks to get bursaries or scholarships, and who refuse to move out of their parents' house and get a job if they're 18-21.

PLing a bit, but both my exes would regularly joke about becoming strippers to afford college and make money. So I'm just assuming this is a usual AWFL "joke" they like to say

In Toronto lots of girls actually do this. The club they tend to work at is constantly passing a bedbug infestation back and forth with the residential units on that block.