Literally looks like a hot dog that was left too long on the grill then someone sliced off 3/4 of it to give to the dog. I couldn't look long enough to tell much more.
Before I opened the spoiler, I was amused when he said "Day 3; gazes still in my vagina," because it took me a minute to realize he meant gauze, and "gazes in my vagina" immediately brought to mind, "staring into the abyss," which turned out to be tremendous foreshadowing.
And now, the grand finale to my post: please allow me to fully recount the tragic ballad of Legal-Ad4972, which may soon draw to a close as he threatens suicide on Reddit.
I just noticed that he's been posting the past few minutes but pretty much all his posts have been removed. I assume it's Reddit's automod and he's full on suicide baiting.
every time an attractive young woman poons out cuz she was molested or saw porn when she was nine or mentally ill some guy needs us all to hear he wishes he could have smashed
every time an attractive young woman poons out cuz she was molested or saw porn when she was nine or mentally ill some guy needs us all to hear he wishes he could have smashed
That's quite the leap...I'm sure it happens, but I don't think it's abnormal to express disappointment when a healthy, attractive woman throws it away by butchering herself. No different than when guys comment that a lantern-jawed, linebacker-shouldered troon could've been a Chad instead of a pervert (or is that just their repressed homosexuality talking?)
Yeah every case is a tragedy, same as drug addiction and many other things, but are you telling me when the local pro ball contender throws away his prospects by (say) holding up a liquor store with his idiot friends, that it doesn't seem like a particular waste of potential?
And now, the grand finale to my post: please allow me to fully recount the tragic ballad of Legal-Ad4972, which may soon draw to a close as he threatens suicide on Reddit.
His saga began December 12, 2023, when he went under the knife with Dr. Jennifer Hyer of Denver Health, but Kiwis did not take notice of him until February 2024... or so we'd thought.
When I read this I got a hunch that the guy may try to take out doctor hyer before he kills himself. Especially if she doesn't give him the apology he demanded. I would be unsurprised if a person driven to madness by a surgery, who is also part of the extreme political left, didn't think about this a lot after luigi mangione got so much love heaped on him for killing a CEO.
every time an attractive young woman poons out cuz she was molested or saw porn when she was nine or mentally ill some guy needs us all to hear he wishes he could have smashed
Another pooner of Veinscrawlian nature, this TiF has been neurotically obsessing about her top surgery results for the past six fucking months! Admittedly, her de-breasting made her chest look goofy as all hell, but it's worthwhile to note that troons 'n' poons rarely ever seem to be truly, completelly and totally happy with themselves after their time under the knife. I have a feeling OP is going to be one of those types to 41%, but only time will tell... CompetitiveMuscle176 (double incision bilateral cosmetic mastectomy)
every time an attractive young woman poons out cuz she was molested or saw porn when she was nine or mentally ill some guy needs us all to hear he wishes he could have smashed
The greatest irony of all is that despite all these hot-blooded hetero Kiwis waxing poetic about beauty lost, many TiFs are TiFs because of an extreme (and unhealthy) reaction to male sexualization and objectification; even regular women who are simply more Jessica Rabbit-tier naturally curvaceous sometimes fantasize about shaving their heads and getting a mastectomy if just to finally be seen as a person instead of an object of desire. Of course, 'tis a fool's errand as this doesn't stop men from their libidinous expressions (did you know Indian men of Instagram are very sexually fixated on head shaving as a kink, for example?), but the desperation exists for a reason.
Enough of all that - we're here to gawk at freakshows, damn it, so the show must go on!
Double-dog ditch: a tranny proudly shows off his 2-week-old stinkditch, which already seems to be forming a second hole - and surely, two pussies must be better than one, right? TransEnoch (Dr. Tim Larner; vaginoplasty) Link | Archive
Currently healing well, (apologies for the hair!). Granulation tissue forming around the vaginal canal (this tissue was initially quite grey/dark due to low blood supply, this has now cleared up after sloughing).
Trying to keep her dry as there is some macerated tissue as i'm finding it hard to keep dry during day to day life so far. Overall i'm extremely happy with the results (my surgeon used a different method while doing the peno-scrotal flap, which seems to have worked well. Depth is currently 5 inchs (large dilator is slightly less for some reason, can't get in further than 4.5 inchs without feelings of pressure/stretching. Which, due to my 'lack of substance' before surgery , is a very good result . I would highly recommend him to anyone thinking it over!
Overall I'm happy with the results. Her care team has been really great both pre and post op and during my hospital stay. My vulva is still mostly numb and has little no sensation including my clitoris so I haven't had an orgasm yet. I'm not too worried about that since I'm only 3 months post op but I really hope that changes soon.
I'm not sure how I feel about it aesthetically, definitely happy I got the surgery but I worry that my vulva isn't normal looking. And my depth is only a little over 4 inches, you can see in the last picture that's as far as I can get my dilator in, about to the third dot. Dr Li told me I have good depth but I consistently see results that are 6+ inches of depth so idk. I'll post a full review of my experience with the surgeon probably around 6-9 months post op
After sporting a microscopic mini-meat to his mutilator, a TiM is happy to show off the final outcome of his procedure, though he really doesn't have much to be proud of given that he looks like a corpse dragged fresh from La Seine. AppearanceSlight3159 (Dr. Gunther; vaginoplasty) Link | Archive
Just passed 7 weeks. Still a lot of swelling which is to be expected. Decent depth considering the lackluster amount of material he had to work with lol.
A proud mother of a bouncing baby boy reports a fully-detailed experience from her stay in the maternity ward after bringing a beautiful little life into this world. Just kidding! A pooner gets a wretched fascimile of Mother Nature's effortless creation made up of own impotent flesh, more akin to a project of Frankensteinian or Cronenbergian origin than that of Eve from Adam's rib. pitterpatter_eh (Dr. Del Corral; anterolateral thigh (ALT) phalloplasty with urethral lengthening and nerve grafting) Link | Archive
Discharged from the hospital! And it was uneventful until today which I’m not surprised at, Murphys law and all.
I’ve not taken any narcotics since waking up from PACU (I’m not a fan). So all of the below for pain etc is on acetaminophen (tylenol) only.
STAFF & EXPERIENCEr DC is awesome and will be open about what is and isn’t possible. However he doesn’t always say everything up front, I’m learning I just need to write down all my questions so I remember to ask. Him and the staff of nurses and techs were fantastic! The ward they put you on is all LGBT so I got to see some peeps uno reversing the other direction (mtf) during my sporadic slow walks in the hall. Dr DC was going out of town before my discharge and came to chat with me before his flight to make sure everything was ok and to remind me I can always message him directly via the portal if I’m anxious about anything. Honestly, super sweet. His resident, Roxy, seems kind and well intentioned but every interaction felt rushed like she was half there just trying to get to the next patient. There were things she mentioned that were just false (like home health having the dressing change supplies needed) and it seemed like she was newer into her residency. She couldn’t answer any of the discharge questions I had (do I need to irrigate, what about bathing rules, etc). She insisted the discharge nurse would know. Spoiler the nurse only knew what was on the paper that was exactly what they provided me before the surgery. So if anything is pressing I will message through the portal.
They automatically set me up for home health visits for the dressing changes, yay! And the coordinator for that was 10/10 amazing.
MY LEGS:For the most part they have both been fine. I have a high pain tolerance so that probably helps, also my donor leg is numb from the nerve grafting. I’m hoping the numbness will subside after more use since it isn’t just the quad, but my whole knee and the inside of my calf/shin on my right leg. Every walk I can feel some sensations trying to tingle like walking up a limb that fell asleep. I just need to balance how much I’m trying to walk without pushing it too far and causing swelling. They told me 6 10min walks per day is a good start. Donor leg was HELLA weak when they first cleared me to get vertical. I think this is a combo of the numbness and the graft site being tight. I’m a lifter and distance runner so my muscles were pretty decent before this. My STG leg was a little weak the first time walking but I assume that’s from the anesthesia and being bedridden for 3 days. That leg is basically fine now in terms of strength and mobility. The STG site tingles slightly but no pain. Only thing that was not fun was removal of the bandage the second time on the day of discharge because the xeroform had shifted (it was put on fairly haphazardly) and the gauze had become stuck to the hardened blood/scabs and she ended up ripping it all open when she redid the dressing
Getting the wound vac off day 4 was fine, I didn’t feel a thing. However I did notice that the hip and inner groin area ended up with some minor swelling after the vac was removed.
THE PEEN:Strong blood flow during every Doppler which surprised the surgeon since he said some of my tissue had really small capillaries). I did a rough measure on day 4 and he was about 6” long and 5.25 girth at tip, 5.75 towards the middle and base. I’m sure he’s shifted around because it’s early days. My goal is between 5.5-6” length and 4.5-5.25 girth as ideal. But honestly he’s a happy healthy new member and I’m just so proud of him for making it through lol. Propping is already a chore, but at least he has good blood flow.
He’s had moments of very minor erotic sensation towards the tip and some pressure sensation towards the base. I plan to start a chart now that I’m home.
UNDER THE PEEN:Y’all. Fuck me when I say I was cautiously optimistic it would be smooth sailing more/less. After my mid-day walk on day 4, I finally had to poop (I’m bladder shy and bedpans were not happening unfortunately). I over estimated how close I was to the toilet seat before releasing some of my support and I’m pretty sure I popped a stitch in my labia from the nerve hookup. The downstairs swelled 3x the already swollen size. It looks like I had scrotoplasty already (literally confused the resident at first). The surgeon said it should resolve on its own and I’m ok to ice it to help with swelling. It doesn’t hurt but is very awkward and uncomfortable for walking around. I’m trying not to overcompensate when I walk so I don’t fuck up my knee or hip which are already bad due to arthritis (yes an athlete with bad joints ).
I haven’t made the same mistake again and getting in/out of bed is already easier than it was just 2 days ago.
MENTALLYI am SO happy. Even with the gross natal bits being a mangled mess (they’re leaving eventually anyway). Honestly I don’t do well sitting still so the bed rest was the hardest part so far. I’m sure that’s bound to change since I’m only day 5 post op. But being able to get up, even just to go to the bathroom is good stimulation for me.
My surgeon does glans at 4 weeks for ALT patients so I have that set for Aug 14. And during that he will have to finish my skin graft for my donor leg which is half STG half integra because I asked him not to touch my tattoo. We’ll see how that goes, but I’m not too worried yet.
Now, for the mobile (and squeamish) Kiwis, some stories.
A TiF who gets a radial forearm flap (RFF) phalloplasty experiences an unexpected complication: crippling, horrific nerve pain that only ketamine can touch. Her doctor worked quickly to find a solution to her issue, but I can't help but wonder what may befall other pooners who may be lured down such a path with providers less savvy... or perhaps less soulful. coconuts_and_lime (Drs. Liedl and Wallmichrath of Urologische Klinik München Planegg; radial forearm flap (RFF) phalloplasty) Link | Archive
I had RFF stage 1 at Urologische Klinik München Planegg (UKMP) with Dr. Liedl's team on 25th of June 2025. More specifically, it was Dr. Wallmichrath who performed the actual surgery. Penis was created using a full-thickness graft from my arm, and my arm was covered with split-thickness graft from my thigh. Immediately post OP, while I was still in the ICU, I experienced nerve pain in my donor arm that slowly increased over the first 1-2 days, until it was so strong and unbearable that painkillers weren't working. I'm talking 10/10, where I was both crying and hyperventilating. Eventually they had to give me ketamine to stop the pain long enough for them to work out a plan.
2 days post OP Dr. Wallmichrath told me it's normal to have arm pain, but that he had never seen anyone experience pain that strong. He did not know why or what to do about it, but he eventually decided it's best to roll me in for another surgery, with my consent. He told me he would open the arm and look for a pinched nerve, and potentially use more skin from my thigh to losen the tightness around the arm.
After waking up he told me nothing seemed out of the ordinary, but nevertheless he moved a nerve a little to lower the risk of pinching it. He also took some more skin from my leg and used in to widen the arm skin. Over the next day or so, the pain lessened. And after another week I was more or less pain free in my arm.
I'm sharing this because I never saw anyone else write about it. Thought it could be useful for yall to know that's a thing that can happen.
Open Sissy-me: a tranny fears that his peritoneal pull-through (PPT) vaginoplasty may be slowly shuttering its gates after only three months post-installation. Thankfully, OP is keeping a cool head about it, because he was thinking of just getting a surface chop anyway. All's well that ends well! bozack33 (Dr. Gupta; peritoneal pull-through (PPT) vaginoplasty) Link | Archive
so i had srs 3 months ago fully ppt im 21 years old my surgeon was Gupta in Cleveland and was fine for the first two months then suddenly dilating became hard like im talking we lost dots after dots of depth and now i can barley get a finger in the doctors have been very communicative and compassionate and i think this was my body healing wrong and not the fault of the doc and tbh its not the end of the world for me it suck do not get me wrong but i was 50/50 on full or zero depth any way but my big fear here is getting any sort of infection and needing surgery or anything getting fucked up just wanted yalls take on this im seeing my doc in 8 days and will report back
That's quite the leap...I'm sure it happens, but I don't think it's abnormal to express disappointment when a healthy, attractive woman throws it away by butchering herself. No different than when guys comment that a lantern-jawed, linebacker-shouldered troon could've been a Chad instead of a pervert (or is that just their repressed homosexuality talking?)
The feminist in me feels the need to say that being a sissy-ass fag doesn't mean that you will never find love and being a brick-shithouse bull dyke doesn't mean that you will never find love either.
The issue for me isn't "You had good looks and you threw them away," the issue is "What made you think that you couldn't be happy as the person you were before?"
There might be a little too much attention paid to the so-called Borderlines, who have an unstable sense of self; I might posit that the troon/pooner is a Cluster B in that he or she has an unstable sense of the gendered self and it exists in multiple states: an eternal truth, a present sense of embodiment, a defiance of gender roles, a role model of sex roles, a dom/sub condition, an oppressed and secretive minority, a member of a large and diverse community, and so forth.
It's this instability that makes the concept so hard to deal with for sane people. You have to accept multiple things as true in order to accept this person's experience as valid.
Whereas relating to a full-on bull dyke lezzer involves accepting that your friend likes grilling meat, putting her arm around her cute wife, and watching "Buffy." What you see is what you get.
I feel like just getting to the point of getting surgery involves a level of caring what people think when they look at you that I just don't understand.
So a person notices my tits. There they are. They are on my chest. If they factor into whether a person wants to hang out or not, what the fuck do I care? That person is a shallow asshole.
I don't mean to call you out. I just think that there's a lot to dissect.
i think a good rule of thumb is if you have to ask, it's probably necrotic.
this thread never ceases to leave me shocked and in total awe. thanks for your contributions @Magic Pickle - incredible, no notes.
people who have the most utterly disturbing and gruesome looking flap and reconstructive surgeries usually get them because they're riddled with cancer or have severe burns/injuries. their choice is either to be disfigured forever or literally die. it's insane to me that the people in this thread get these procedures willingly without the only other option being death. i would rather have a total laryngectomy flap (with complications, even) than have my bits rearranged by a woke gendie surgeon.
I don't really disagree with any of this (except that the bull dyke in your scenario is more likely to roundhouse her cute "wife"). But men are naturally protective of women, and moreso when they're attractive.
Likewise a young Arnold or Tom Brady trooning out would garner more disappointment than if I did. Doesn't mean the less genetically gifted don't deserve sympathy.
Every time I open this thread, I always have the same reaction, yet I cannot stop returning. A true guilty pleasure of mine to see an ever growing amount of fuck ups by the mentally ill.
Jordan Peterson be crying a little too hard over teen mastectomies sometimes but it’s Peterson so that could just be the Covid Xanny coma damage, I don’t know.
This doesn’t make me cry, it just makes me angry.
Does anyone else like to peruse old posts in this thread just to check if any of these people eventually stopped posting and (probably) 41%’d themselves?
Does anyone else like to peruse old posts in this thread just to check if any of these people eventually stopped posting and (probably) 41%’d themselves?
Does anyone else like to peruse old posts in this thread just to check if any of these people eventually stopped posting and (probably) 41%’d themselves?
All the time! It's actually why I include usernames on posts to make it easier to follow along with certain surgical sagas. After the demise of our dear Gruffin, I now keep close watch of users who seem to suffer more than most post-procedure.
Now, my thread tax.
The commonality in which top surgery scars on TiFs split open and invite further (and potentially more intense) infections is fucking insanity. What other medical procedure has sutures that continue to pop open at random times months after surgery? At this point, any surgeon who does mastectomies should be audited to hell and back. Emil_Arian00 (bilateral cosmetic mastectomy) Link | Archive
Hey, first of all sry for my english. I had top surgery 2 months ago and my scars dont heal. Around 6 weeks post op one part of my scar opened. Its not infectet thankfully but its really annoying. Then it kinda healt and now it opened again and some other parts opened too. I went to a doctor but they told me to keep it clean and just wait. Has anyone experience with that?
The results of this FTM's top surgery remain hidden under a bandage for now, but the real reason I'm posting this is because it features the incredibly creepy pooner phenomenon of top surgery buddies (for those disinterested in clicking that link, "top surgery buddies" are little plush toys TiFs take into the operating room with them who are modified to have either surgical binders or scars of their own in an act of silly solidarity). Very creepy. Apprehensive-Read729 (Dr. Peterson; double incision bilateral cosmetic mastectomy) Link | Archive
Heads up: boobs then blood. (And bad bathroom lighting)
It's done! The surgeon's team was great and my surgeon, DR. Peterson in PA, said they were happy with the result!It's such a relief both mentally and physically and I'm already more relaxed And my husband sewed a surgery binder and shirt for my Teddy Bear while I was under I was so surprised lol, the nurse loved it too
As for feeling, the incisions for my tubes feel like big paper cuts and the binder is snug, but the discomfort is manageable. Honestly it feels better than my worst days of breast pain! And I had so much extra tissue on the sides removed that letting my arms hang down is more comfortable now that it used to be.
I'm so happy with how all of this has turned out
After getting a rotdog stapled to her stupid pelvis, a FTM is upset that despite following proper wound care for her surgical graft, her arm is still obviously mutilated. The irony in this, to me, is that the better healed scars are honestly harder to pass off as scars from accidents! OP should be grateful for her scar because she sincerely looks like she spilled a pot of boiling water on her arm rather than whatever weird shit the other girls get. Shot-View-891 (Dr. Stranix at UVA; radial forearm flap (RFF) phalloplasty) Link | Archive
I had RFF June 2023 with Dr. Stranix @ UVA. Now over 2 years post op this is what my healed graft looks like. I kept it out of sun (& still do), tried silicone, did massaging early on. I still don’t have a single regret and my life has significantly changed for the better since having phallo. But I still feel people’s eyes on me anytime im out in public & I don’t know how to make that feeling go away.
Finally took the dressing off, the surgery site looks fine umo but should I be concerned about the small openings? This is 9 days post OP
I assume un time they will heal up well?
As for previous swelling, it's all dying down and colour us returning back to normal, I have been informed that it is just blood buildup under the skin and nothing to worry about but nobody has seen the surgery site yet.
Which leads me to provide an update for Veinscrawler himself: he is continuing to caterwaul helplessly on Reddit about his botched results. It seems that he's not getting as much sympathy as he used to, because comments continue to dwindle on his pathetic posts. For supposedly being so intelligent and having a better understanding of anatomy than most surgeons, it still seems to escape VC's understanding how cutting off your genitals might impact your ability to climax ever again. Last Post Link | Archive
Pretty self-explanatory. Surgeon discarded almost all of my glans. I have basically no feeling there now. Less than I did immediately after surgery, probably because some swelling was increasing the surface area. Definitely nothing compared to the amount I had before surgery, which was still less than most people. Is there anything to do about that, or should I just accept that I'll never be able to enjoy sexual stimulation again?
Speaking of other children that God forgot, No_Bodybuilder5256's despair, like VC's, continues onward as he writes that he is upset that his "kitty" looks "angry" and that he's impatient to finally be a "normal straight couple" with his sleazy chaser boyfriend. Poor baby, don't you know you're here forever, now? Last Post Link | Archive
3 weeks post-op and I (23) have just been feeling sad every day, I’m recovering all alone without any family around (my family is around but just in different countries and I didnt tell them about surgery and just went into it, big mistake, family/support is needed SO MUCH during recovery).
The morning and the day before the surgery I was so joyful and happy and SUPER EXCITED, woke up after surgery felt foggy and didnt know where I was, and just wanted to close my eyes and rest and I did. Woke up a few hours later and finally saw down and saw a huge white bandage-kinda packing and felt relieved that I have my vagina now. The anesthesia after-effects were still in full effects and I felt nauseous all the time, my blood pressure was 89/52 mm of hg after the surgery, and it remained in that range for a couple days, slowly on the 4th day it rose to around 102/79 mm of hg, the nurses tried to make me walk but as soon as I took some steps I felt like I was gonna pass out and the whole squad of nurses caught me right away and got me wheelchair and brought me back to my room, I threw up after that. The next day I was able to walk and they shifted me to the recovery home, I felt so alone in their and felt like it was JAIL, the food smell made me want to throw up and eventually I did throw up I didnt eat anything there, I was there in that recovery home for 6 days or so (I dont even remember, I was so traumatized forgot already), those days were the most horrible days of my life, I wanted to end my life in that dark room so many times, I just wanted to be in my bed and my home atmosphere. Day came, I was gonna fly home I felt happy that im finally going home and will be able to have my comfort food that my body actually enjoys.
Came back home, felt really weird and cried a lot (that was day 11). I wasnt dilating according to the schedule and was just procrastinating it, just crying every other hour in my bed. Finally gathered some courage to dilate and did dilate for 2, sometimes 3 times a day. Started back hormones because people said that could be the reason of depression. Had my first follow-up with the nurse and I did my makeup and dressed up and everything and went out and felt pretty okay and I cried in the clinic to the nurse and made her cry too, she told me its okay, this phase isnt gonna last forever and the worst days are already behind us and NEVER coming back. She treated my hyper granulation with care and patience and answered all my questions gently. She told me to douche with 1:1 vinegar:distilled water solution for my hypergranulation and just air dry as much as possible and dilate with the smaller dilators for now and reassured me that we will not lose anything with dilating with smaller dilators (#2 and #3) for now. Slowly started being consistent with those 2 dilators and finally was able to make up to 4 dilations per day and started doing the vinegar douche. Saw her again a couple days ago for the second follow up and she was so happy to see how much things have changed and reassured me that things are going well for me. Hyper granulation is still a major source of depression to me right now. Both the times my hyper granulation was treated with silver nitrate and I was given a saline solution if it burns to apply on it. I have been hyper vigilant of my vagina rn and I dont like how angry she looks and how it doesn’t look like a “normal” body part at all, it has me in loop that she will never be a normal body part of mine and even though my poor kitty is doing everything she can to heal (maybe even working overtime- hyper granulation) and im not able to provide her love and patience that she deserves. I’m not at all regretting this surgery but I’m also not feeling euphoric at all right now and all the feelings I thought I would be feeling.
I’m really impatient already and just want to use her for the purpose she was made for and let me and my boyfriend have a normal “straight” couple life. Me and my bf are long distance so he cant even hold me in his arms during this hard time. I feel like my vagina is ugly and its really hard for me to give her the love she is needing rn and the patience and the mild pain drives me crazy and makes me cry a lot. I just want this time to pass asap I just want to feel like a normal girl with a normal vagina, I’m really super impatiently waiting for that time, I just want this time to pass ASAP.
What im looking through this post is, if some of y’all had same feelings as me and now are in much better places, to drop your comments and thoughts and your journey so I can feel a bit hopeful and that the hardest days are already behind me and the time I’m super impatiently waiting for is coming sooner than I think it is.
I hope y’all are having a good time.
Only 6 months post cock-chop, a tranny reports the aftermath has been "anything but smooth," stating that dilation is "painful and really difficult" and that he is still too frail to get back into the job market. In fact, the pain has been so intense that historically, even codeine-based painkillers do not touch the pain, and he struggles with feeling as if he "gave up everything in [me]" to get this surgery. Another life-saving procedure! Remarkable_Sea_5052 (vaginoplasty) Link | Archive
Hi everyone. I'm posting this here because r/transgendersurgeries got taken down a few months ago. I wasn't sure where else to go. I wanted to ask for some advice. I'm 23, 6 months post op and things have been anything but smooth. Dilation has been a rough journey, it's always been painful and I've had some extra ordinary issues with hypergranulation. I get silver nitrate treatment every 2 weeks and it doesn't seem to be helping at all. It's painful and really difficult. I've been told not to size up my dilator until it goes away (I still use the smallest one) and I struggle to get past the 3rd dot, and even that takes me over 2 hours, when it should take 20 minutes. I'm STILL too weak to work and I feel like I'm reaching my wits end with this thing. My life is on hold and it feels like I've given everything in me for this surgery. It's the hardest thing I've ever done and I can't see the light at the end. I only had my first follow up appointment with my surgeon a couple of weeks ago because of distance and money struggles, also mentally it took me a long time to feel like going back to the hospital wasn't going to send me into a panic attack. Other trans women seem to deal with this a lot better. I wish I was as strong as some of you dolls
Now please permit me to introduce you to a most miserable of pooners: a 24-year-old TiF from Vermont named hartleyisboring whose full-body butchery was entirely paid by the tax dollars of American citizens through Medicaid.
But time would not be kind to our li'l dood, as nothing but horrible complications have taken place ever since, including a third fistula revision that has already failed after a mere two weeks. Her urologist, Dr. Moses, is now introducing the possibility of making a custom hole and under her neoballs and "calling it quits," which terrifies OP as she dreams of "sex with my girlfriend," "writing my name in the snow," and "getting rid of this catheter, the monthly infections and the horsepill antiobiotics." In pursuit of her lofty goals, she's working a miserable position in the restaurant industry to stay poor enough to be eligible for Medicaid, lives with multiple asshat roommates, gained weight, became an alcoholic and also experienced her girlfriend cheating on her due to a lack of satisfaction. In spite of all of this? NO REGRETS! hartleyisboring (Drs. Nigriny and Moses; radial forearm flap (RFF) phalloplasty with urethral lengthening and scrotoplasty) Link | Archive
When does it get better. It’s been 2 years since stage 1, I’m currently recovering from my third fistula revision, and it’s already back again 2 weeks post op. Haven’t had glans/testicular implants or ED yet, have to wait for urethra to work. Big reason why I’m going down this road is so I can be as physically close to male as possible, and that includes pissing standing up. My urologist (lovely lady, nothing against her) is recommending just creating a hole near my sac and calling it quits. I want to have normal sex with my girlfriend, want to write my name in the snow, get rid of this catheter and the monthly infections and horse pill antibiotics that come with it. Have had to put so much of my life and goals on pause because of the complications, try and pretend to be happy in a crappy kitchen job position to continue being on Medicaid so this is covered, stay in a shithole apartment with not ideal roommates and live paycheck to paycheck, gained a lot of weight, stopped going to the gym, alcohol abuse worse each failed surgery, girlfriend cheated on me last year because I haven’t been able to meet needs. I feel like there isn’t much talk about the ugly side of these procedures. Sure I’m probably being dramatic, this is a doomer post after checking things out in the mirror, but things feel intense right now. Can only ignore it for so long. What are my options, when do I see the light at the end of the tunnel? Has anyone else here been in this position, and what do you do to not succumb to the constant disappointment? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not regretting phallo, and I’m incredibly grateful it is an option, I would have offed myself already if this wasn’t something I could attain. But being the 1/3 guy each time who does have a complication is a punch to the gut each time. What do I do?
, is a very good result 
. I would highly recommend him to anyone thinking it over!
r DC is awesome and will be open about what is and isn’t possible. However he doesn’t always say everything up front, I’m learning I just need to write down all my questions so I remember to ask. Him and the staff of nurses and techs were fantastic! The ward they put you on is all LGBT so I got to see some peeps uno reversing the other direction (mtf) during my sporadic slow walks in the hall. Dr DC was going out of town before my discharge and came to chat with me before his flight to make sure everything was ok and to remind me I can always message him directly via the portal if I’m anxious about anything. Honestly, super sweet.
).
but it’s Peterson so that could just be the Covid Xanny coma damage, I don’t know. 
and I'm already more relaxed
I was so surprised lol, the nurse loved it too
(TW)
, family/support is needed SO MUCH during recovery).
