Containment What If?

What if you heard a noise in the middle of the night, turned the light on, and saw this at the end of your bed:
 

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What if Kane from the Command & Conquer series was the next enemy for Chris to overcome?

or...

The Brotherhood of Nod had to harvest pure autism to maintain their military force at top strength.

or...

What if Chris actually had some stakes in his life other than the Financhu Crisis?
Some people are rightfully complaining that Chris is just not as fun as when he was on his love quest. I agree. Currently he's just kind of hanging on. Yeah he wants money to live on, but also we know it's to buy lazy ass toys and games so he can be lazy and a fat ass for a while longer until the next time he has to tap the community for more money to buy him some time to be lazy and the cycle seems to repeat.
What goals does he honestly have anymore? What potential losses does he have that he can see other than what can be caused by the financhu crisis? Back then, he had a plan for various things that he wanted or wanted to achieve, but not now.
So... what if there were stakes again in his life? What does he have to gain or lose?
Forget it. He's probably just too lazy to even dream anymore.

(Back to silly.)

or...

What if the Sonichu abominations had their own Saturday morning cartoon series in the vein of Fat Albert where they had to sing in a junk yard this week's moral? It would a moral that Chris learns that week... then forgets about the next week.

or...

Chris was an evil god in Dungeons & Dragons and the monsters that worship him are little Sonichu beasts?
 
What if Chris crashed his car into a police station?
 
What if Chris had to travel through alternate realities, destroying all other Chrisses in order to absorb their power and become SuperMega Ultimate Chris with Ultra Shityourself Actionfigure Powe ®
 
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He'd fail because nobody would fuck him back then, either.

What if Chris had tried out for cheerleading while in school?
He'd be reasonably successful because they wouldn't need to lift him, they could just squeeze him and his greasy body would fly into the air. And his fat ass would provide cushioning, so there would be no need to catch him.

The cheer uniforms, of course, would be blue-sleeved hazmat suits.
 
All In The Family

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Some more;

Family Lies
Home Disprovement
Diff'rent Groans
Unhappy Days
Modern Stubborn Family
Everybody Hates Christian
Family Blabbers
Boy Trolls World
Full Horde
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Fresh Wimp of Despair

No-Growing Pains
Chandlerfield
Paid-Friends
The Chandler Bunch
The (Wo)Manchild Show
 
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