can someone bring me up to speed on the last 3 months of Mr Warwicks' life. no more than 5 bullet point.
1. He's now a convicted felon on probation because he threw a cell phone at one of his hoes on vacation in New Orleans but it was the one he was deeply in love with (Sam Keister yes it's a real name) so he didn't even try to defend himself in court.
2. He consistently violated the terms of the probation and Sam actually reported him for new charges, this time in Vermont, including negligent discharge of a firearm. He was arrested, there's a hilarious video of the arrest filmed by another one of his hoes, Nikki. He faces many years in prison because gun laws are gay and unbalanced.
3. As the court date for this very serious gun charge loomed, he began to drink more, embarrass himself on stream, and begin to lie to his fans that he was actually dying. He got in a physical altercation with Nikki and she knocked out one of his front teeth. He now talks with a lisp while still dressing like a bondage pirate.
4. The court in New Orleans got sick of his nonsense and the prosecutor asked for him to lose his probation and go to jail. Right before the remote court hearing for this case his mom got on the call and told the judge he had a seizure and he's at the hospital, but he was seen on Twitter and kiwi Farms shortly before and after the hearing time.
5. Right after this seizure he very
publicly ran away to New York City and is living with a literal retarded girl named Mel, but he has an inescapable court date this Friday. He's starting to amp up again and we are all wondering if he's going to evade another court date and become a fugitive, or face the music and go to jail.
Bonus bullet point: Nikki confirmed that Styx has considered suicide by cop, and in his pirate arrest video, you can see him hold on to his holstered machete just a couple seconds longer than he should almost like he was planning to attack.
Hopefully you are his prosecutor...