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I use pineapple rings and put maraschino cherries in the middle of each one and attach them with toothpicks.
💀 Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
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I miss when he'd plaster paragraphs and paragraphs of nonsense over completely unrelated reaction images/memes.
Politics and Economics are interchangeable to him. What's worse is, with his level of understanding, they might as well be another language. That applies to basically everything though, LOL.
I c I c, go on because I think we all know which current topic he's referring to here. (Literally no idea.)
Eat, my pretty. Eat.
LOL. Do you think he remembers his last college experience?
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2022
When he was paid to go to community college and got pissy that girls there ignored him. And he recorded himself creepily watching college girls get on a bus.
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
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- Dec 17, 2019
Thats the best part, he rees about free college and all that but doesn't give a shit about actually getting an education and a useful degree himself. By his own admission the only reason he went to school at all was because he thought he would somehow meet a zoomer bae (nevermind the fact that he thought the same thing in elementary and high school and didn't meet anybody who didn't recognize he was a nutjob and want nothing to do with him back then either. Also note that despite lucas's more recent retcons of his past to occasionally include bullshit made up claims about totally having had a girlfriend back in high school, he directly contradicted that claim in his 2010 reflections, to the point of even admitting that he used to be really bothered back then about not having a girlfriend but it got easier for him to handle somewhat when he convinced himself that if he just studied and got himself into a good college that he'd totally meet one there, so he can't keep his lies or his own history straight and assumes people are too stupid to notice this) with his secondary reason being getting a bunch of free money from the government that he could immediately spend on expensive food, which is exactly what he did. He couldn't have cared less about actually getting an education and was too stupid to graduate from his program anyway. and its not like it was a very difficult program either. It wasn't even a technical one, which would have made him blow a gasket within the first month.
The funny thing is lucas wanted to do a science based program not because he had any actual genuine interest in becoming a scientist with an actual paid job but because he thought it would impress the zoomer baes and make people think he knew what he was talking about with the telomere shit instead of rightfully calling him out every time he opens his mouth and makes a bizarre claim about telomeres. If he had any brains at all lucas would have avoided those sorts of programs entirely and just signed up for whatever GED program SCC offered, so he could at least finish his high school education and achieve something in life in that. No doubt this was suggested to him when the admission staff figured out he never graduated from high school but of course lucas is too stupid to do it. No, he had to be dr nigger luke. Frankly i'm surprised they allowed him into the bio program without it, as if he's incapable of graduating high school and failing the first time he tried to get a GED, any kind of college course probably isn't a good iea. Though they might have made him take the math and english as prereq's for staying in the program and made his progression dependent on passing them
I do wonder what would have happened if he had taken a game design course instead. He'd never have passed it, those courses are far more difficult and time consuming than many people realize and require actual design skills. Not to mention they usually have at least one programming class involved, as the general philosophy for game designers these days is they should have at least some understanding of the technical side of things and what is feasible and practical from it to help them with their design work. Lucas would never have been able to complete even the simplest assignment in the simplest intro to programming class. Lucas is both too stupid and far too lacking in the capacity for abstract thinking. He can't fill out a form even with step by step instructions, he needs to have someone else do it for him. Can you imagine the chimpout lucas would have in a java class? Better yet an angular class. Just trying to get the IDE set up and working would make him blow a gasket
and of course he would absolutely try to do it on his phone and when he realized he's too stupid for any of it he'd try to use AI generated code, completely unaware that code review is a thing and that AI generated code is immediately obvious. Lucas having to explain to his instructor exactly how his code works and what made him write it that way and try to bullshit his way through it would be hilarious
But yeah, like I was saying, lucas has absolutely no interest in education itself or even learning for the sake of learning, or for getting a career. Its just a means to an end for him and a way of milking the government out of free money to stuff his face with and a new place to creep on zoomer baes. Same as free healthcare. Lucas doesn't give a shit about free healthcare for everyone else, he just wants to make sure he gets it for himself. His reasoning for UBI goes without saying, free money. I don't doubt there are times when lucas gets very jealous that he wasn't born in one of those tiny european countries that are experimenting with that UBI shit. Never occurs to him that they only do any of it at all due to massively high taxes. He thinks he can just tax the rich and billionaires into infinite tax dollars to do all this stuff and doesn't understand their resources are finite, especially when talking about the scale of a countries finances. He also likes to ree about systems that include both a moneyless 'gift economy' which is and has never been an actual thing, while also somehow including automatic UBI for everybody. The contradiction never crosses his mind
Also I like how little effort he put into that pasta. He didn't even mince the bacon and mix it well he just made a few big chunks and tossed it in. Lazy as always
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- Apr 7, 2022
Even if Lucas could get an associate's degree, it's useless now since he wouldn't turn into a career. The single reason he went was to fuck zoomer puss puss.
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
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- Dec 17, 2019
Yeah exactly. Even if he somehow did manage to get one he'd never have used it, so the state funding his college saga was wasting money that could have gone to someone that actually needed it and would have done something with their education. Maybe even some woman with a kid who was trying to get an education to provide for that kid that was denied that funding because of lucas. I'm still surprised he was able to get any funding for it at all considering he didn't even have a high school diploma or a GED and shouldn't have qualified for his chosen program anyway
Also, this comes off eerily like lucas's famous starbucks incident, only without the creepy note and spaz out:
The Garden
kiwifarms.net
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- Sep 30, 2021
My favorite claim from Lucas's whole "gift economy" fantasy is that there will be hookers everywhere. Hey Lucas, if there's no money and no need for it, why would women be selling their bodies? He really only sees women as sex dispensers.
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- Aug 17, 2019
No way, Baby Cakes isn’t a volatile horny schizo he’s just a lovable retard who sees the world in a magical way. Plus unlike Lucas he’s actually good at tabletop games.
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- Feb 1, 2020
To say the tard has never fleshed out his own ideas is a huge understatement. He is bias personified. I'd say it must be a miserable existence for the whole of reality to massively contradict every single thing that goes on in his broken brain, but I legitimately think his broken brain is incapable of achieving that level of awareness. All that really happens is he warps reality's obvious contradictions into some bizarre form of confirmation bias that justified retarded worldview.
Lucas is perpetually stuck in the most vicious, dysfunctional, and pants-on-head retarded cycle, that's only a cycle in that the schizofrenic moron won't hop off despite it never functioning. Not once, and the reason he won't is that same bias telling him that it's everyone else that's wrong. Not him. Not Myrna's special lil' baby boy.
You don't end up like Lucas if you're a schizofrenic and a retard, alone. You end up like Lucas when you, as a system, are inherently defective. The fact that he's also schizofrenic and a retard just make the problem worse because it helps him create some sort of false pathway to convince himself he, the system, is not a broken, dysfunctioning ness.
There are so many variables that result into creating someone like Lucas, but I honestly don't believe the Lucas equation works to such a degree without a Myrna. That boomer woman did not develop her mongoloid offspring whatsoever. In fact, it was the opposite. Myrna enabled dysfunction as his foundation by coddling him while never actually paying attention to him. He learned all this retarded shit was okay because Myrna kept throwing ice cream bars at Lucas for every problem, while plopping him down in front of the TV so she could gossip and gab all day.
On that note, I am really curious how Lucas's pathological obsession with food presented itself when he was younger, before his family figured out "oh, there's something very seriously wrong with him." Like, he might not have been quite as bad before he super duper fucked his brain up with psychedelics, but I still have to imagine he said some bizarre shit. Where people would squint their eyes while looking at him and think "WTF?" I'm especially curious if his family retrospectively recalls anything Lucas has said, and go "It all makes sense now."
I love how he gets so little engagement. Even lefties, ranging from casual to ardent, ignore his babble. It's definitely the smarter play since Lucas destroys any credibility and is inherently a force divider for anything he supports.
Says man who has earned neither, yet still has all of life's necessities (and then some) provided to him free of charge.
I thought that Lucas did get his HS diploma or GED, late and through correspondence courses, but still. Do we know for a fact that he actually didn’t?
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- Apr 7, 2022
Lucas himself said he lacked credits to graduated high school. Then I think he tried for his GED and failed. I don't know, I remember being confused how he even got to take college courses.
The Garden
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Myrna would give him food whenever he was upset. In his bizarre plea for people to beat up Cyril for him "autobiography", he mentioned that she was still using food to distract him. The only thing close to comfort he got growing up was food. And, let's be real, his life has very uncomfortable these last few decades. A normal person would crave a comfort food from childhood when sick or stressed. Lucas is that way all the time and has no other comfort to turn to. Add to that his incestuous feelings towards her expressed in the same writing, and I can see why food got mixed up with everything meant to be pleasurable for him.
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- Dec 28, 2014
If people blow you to bloody ribbons for throwing rocks at them, I dunno, maybe DON'T throw rocks at them? Maybe it's a bad idea to bring a rock to a gunfight?
CruelGermanGirl
kiwifarms.net
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- Aug 1, 2024
Stop the politispering fat boi, get down Post St to find your kween this spring!
OopUntilYouVibe
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- Mar 23, 2026
An absolute abomination. Wtf..
I posted him getting mad at this same type of shit last week in a braindead engagement farm Facebook group…
It’s so pathetic. He’s proud of getting mad at AI.
I posted him getting mad at this same type of shit last week in a braindead engagement farm Facebook group…
It’s so pathetic. He’s proud of getting mad at AI.
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WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
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- Dec 17, 2019
As @BPD Gunt Rider said lucas admitted he 'didn't quite have all the credits to graduate high school' and tried to get a GED while living with cyril after moving in with him, though he either failed or never completed it and whined about how cyril wouldn't let him use the computer to do his homework and things of that nature. Hence how he mentioned how SCC wasn't happy that he couldn't provide proof of graduation or a GED when he went to college and how he clearly hoped he could bs his way through that and get in without one. As I said I suspect this is why he was put into the math and english classes, because of high school related prereqs for the bio program that lucas didn't have so they bent the rules cause he's a retard who they knew was trying to bs his way into the program and let him take those classes as part of his program. It also explains why he 'quit' when he failed out of math, because it was a requirement to stay in the program. Also explains why he never tried to go back. Even if he could get funding again he would have to take the math class again and pass it, which he knows he is too stupid to do
For a second I thought he had melted cheese slices on fig bars, which absolutely sounds like something lucas would doOopUntilYouVibe said:
I felt pretty good about myself that I screamed like a loon at a woman that shes a bigot and blocked her for asking a legitimate questionOopUntilYouVibe said:
Everything about that post screams predatory pedo. The unhinged inappropriate level of anger, the fact he thinks its nobody elses business (aka keep your mouth shut little girl and don't tell your parents i'm trying to groom you, which he has pulled in multiple cases and we've got chat logs of) and the manipulative attempt to turn it around to justify his behavior. Its no wonder he gets kicked out of places and slapped upside the head by people and why he's so paranoid about people knowing what he says and does with people
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- Feb 1, 2020
I'm not entirely sure what the thing on the left is, other than the cheese. While the dude is obsessed with food, it seems to only be those of the salty/sweet variety because I don't really recall ever seeing vegetables. I'm sure there's been pics with vegetables, but they've never been the feature.
So he called a lady a bigot today, which he calls people a bigot every day? Okay. Plus this was online, so you have to take that for what it's worth.
On the flipside, eating and calling people bigots is the greatest extent of accomplishes that Lucas's feeble mind can manage, so way to go! Go get'em tiger. You should feel good about yours young man!