🍔 Quarterpounder Jeremy Hambly / The Quartering / MTGHeadquarters / Unsleeved Media / Midwestly - Buttblasted alcoholic manchild upset he was banned from a childrens' card game, Grifter, supporter of the cancel culture, cucked by a Jewish bull (Adam Sellers), pisses in basement, shits himself, FLAGGOT, stalks little girls in public, scammer, sex pest

[AltisticRight]

I must have missed it but how did we go from one bull to another? How did we decide it was the RC car guy?

There's at least 2 bulls now. One is the criminal domestic abuser Jew bull and the other is the sky bull.
There are more bulls to uncover.

I really don't get the coffee grift with Jer. Did he just hop on because he wanted to compete with conservative grifting brands like Black Rifle despite making CBC explicitly apolitical? Was it just another grift opportunity after buying and repackaging Player One Coffee? He doesn't seem particularly knowledgeable about coffee or invested in the enjoyment of it, from what I can tell. He probably cuts his with his trademark vodka water or those tiny bottles of Fireball at this point.

It's because coffee consumption is growing (especially now with India and China developing a coffee culture) while production cannot keep up. We have been in half a decade of a bean deficit.

Jer saw dollar signs. He found a good supplier but he had to overplay his role to larp as a legitimate in-house roaster when he's clearly just a white labeller (which is fine, we don't really care).
(He's not a drop shipper, he uses white labelling. As far as I know, CBC handles the logistics.)
We won't know why it failed unless we see their finances. My guess is that he spent all the money on fruitless manbaby gadgets like colourful cardboard and remote control toys.

Spoiler: More coffee autism

Hell, the Chinese are drinking more coffee than tea. I showed this to my dad the other day and he spat his out in shock.

Being able to offer good quality beans with traceable ethical sourcing is getting quite lucrative. Coffee as a hobby is also a well-off, middle class thing. These people have extra money to waste on another dumb grinder or stupid chintzy pour-over gadget.
The deficit is caused by many complex issues, such as an aging farmer population, the youth moving into cities instead of picking up farming from their family and (oh no *gasp* not on my forum) cl*mate ch*nge.
Europe's stringent regulations doesn't help either, it's hard to start a farm fresh in the right climate.

To those who don't know, the flavouring on the package is what the coffee will smell and taste like. It's not artificial flavouring. Different roasting methods and beans does this. Luther didn't know what he was talking about.

Black Rifle Coffee roast their own beans even if they're really consumerist-focused (like subscriptions that are hard to cancel, don't ask me how I know that).

From what I understand if you're a KF mod it's like tradition or something that before they go on a date with a new prospective suitor, they're required to introduce their date to Null, and allow him to suck on their bare toes.

KF mods? Date?
Woah buddy.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

is he fatter than PPP?!?!

He looks like he's about to go full Fat Bastard on Smellonie.
"I'm gonna eat yeh... GET IN MAH BELLY!"

 

[Irregardless]

KF mods? Date?
Woah buddy.

You're lying.
HE'S LYING EVERYBODY.

You told me this yesterday and are now trying to cover it up with humor.
It's not gunna work.

The only other reason you could be lying right now is that you have a bish hidden away somewhere, toes unsucked, and don't want to let Null know.
You know what you're doing ain't right, give Null them tootsies.

 

[moocow]

I really want to hear your top five ideas for dates and family fun.

I'm sure you do. I can assure you a fucking ren fair isn't on the list.

Wtf is wrong with you? Almost every woman he was creeping on was dressed normally for summer. He was commenting on keeping it tight, and mom's being DTF, and creeping on actual children.

Yeah, and that's why I said his commentary is what should have gotten his teeth knocked out.

Pearl clutchers are always so funny. I'm literally agreeing with you he should get his ass kicked and dragged out for what he's saying and doing. But you dumb shits are just so hell-bent on "oh-my-gosh"'ing in just a specifically-prescribed way that no other angle of outrage will possibly do.

Kinda reminding me of SJWs here a little bit, lads, not gonna lie.

 

[Archduke of Sneedinheim]

Maybe it's my constitution that sucks, but I've always found Cafe Bustelo too bitter/sour from tannins.

They do make lighter roasts, if you want to try one just grab the k cups if your work or you has the machine for it then your not stuck with a entire can of coffee you hate.

Cafe Bustelo will put some extra hair on your chest.

Espresso ground and a french press if you want to start turning into a ape.

 

[Malikov]

Jeremy dresses like Fat Homer.

 

[DSP for president 2032]

I'm sure you do. I can assure you a fucking ren fair isn't on the list.

Leak the list or youse a bitch.

I'm literally agreeing with you he should get his ass kicked and dragged out for what he's saying and doing.

Hey Wes Watson, you are not agreeing with me at all. I'm saying that the laws need to be tighter so that the women who are being sexually harassed and creepshotted can call the cops on him. I'm not an internet tough guy.

Also, Jeremy is a 6 foot 5 giant. If you didn't know he was a giant baby, would you step to him? And what if he beats you up, is he allowed to harass your woman now?

 

[BootyWarriorUkaUka]

Bring all your bulls to the hot tub. We were promised big ole boobs.

 

[moocow]

Leak the list or youse a bitch.

I'm not going on a date with you.

Hey Wes Watson, you are not agreeing with me at all.

I use the term "you" in the sense of the "metaphorical you," as in "all of the pearl-clutchers, not just your faggy ass in particular."

Also, Jeremy is a 6 foot 5 giant. If you didn't know he was a giant baby, would you step to him? And what if he beats you up, is he allowed to harass your woman now?

"Yes," and "no." I carry, and I defend my loved ones. Also, we would not be in attendance at a ren faire in the first place.

Keep trying. You'll figure this out eventually, big guy.

 

[Rich Evans Ayypologist]

To those who don't know, the flavouring on the package is what the coffee will smell and taste like. It's not artificial flavouring. Different roasting methods and beans does this. Luther didn't know what he was talking about.

I think the confusion stems from Jer selling so much flavored coffee (which is just near-expiry beans dunked into flavored oils which will fuck up your grinder)... as well as the fact that most storebought coffee, and I would assume internet-shipped coffee (why the fuck would you do this) tastes like complete shit, so the idea that coffee can even have different natural flavors beyond 'light-medium-dark roast' is not particularly well-known.

 

[TertiaryObjective]

I think the confusion stems from Jer selling so much flavored coffee (which is just near-expiry beans dunked into flavored oils which will fuck up your grinder)... as well as the fact that most storebought coffee, and I would assume internet-shipped coffee (why the fuck would you do this) tastes like complete shit, so the idea that coffee can even have different natural flavors beyond 'light-medium-dark roast' is not particularly well-known.

Aren’t the flavored oils artificial? How do they make rum flavored blueberry orange pumpkin shit?

 

[Spooky Dogwood]

I think the confusion stems from Jer selling so much flavored coffee (which is just near-expiry beans dunked into flavored oils which will fuck up your grinder)... as well as the fact that most storebought coffee, and I would assume internet-shipped coffee (why the fuck would you do this) tastes like complete shit, so the idea that coffee can even have different natural flavors beyond 'light-medium-dark roast' is not particularly well-known.

Most people who want flavored coffee buy specific creamers. Selling flavored coffee was probably a huge misstep.

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

It doo bee doo bee do be like that, Mr. Hambly.

 

[Rich Evans Ayypologist]

Aren’t the flavored oils artificial? How do they make rum flavored blueberry orange pumpkin shit?

Yes, those are. However, for example - I enjoy a blend of Ethiopian Harrar prettymuch as a staple, which has chocolate notes just in the bean itself. They're subtle little flavors that you're best able to notice if you prepare the stuff as straight espresso. These are naturally-occurring flavors which will vary from bean to bean and from roasting process to roasting process; I also enjoy Yirgacheffe, which has a totally different flavor profile.

Most people who want flavored coffee buy specific creamers. Selling flavored coffee was probably a huge misstep.

Most people who buy flavored coffee overlap with people who buy creamers, as anyone serious about their coffee buys neither. Jer was obviously intending to target casual consumers... but failed to recognize that casual consumers cannot tell one coffee from another. Their main focus is going to be price-point. Their second focus will be finding a coffee whose flavor they like well-enough and which is reliable. And their third focus will be brand identity. Jer has fucked all three of these things.

His price-points are absolutely fucking retarded, charging outrageous premiums that make no sense even for actually-good coffee: prices that high are only explained by marketing and brand recognition. K-cup coffee is outrageously expensive because cattle love their convenience, but he charges whole and ground bags at above normal k-cup rates: no-one's going to buy that shit even outside of a recession. For example, I buy my coffee of choice at about $12/pound, whole-bean. It's a lot pricier than store-bought, but it fits my budget just-fine and the quality jump is tremendous. I'd say it's common for coffee hipsters to spend around $20/pound, which is still a ridiculous overcharge. Jer's coffee, which is old shit dunked into flavored oils, is $20/ 12 oz. His core audience, retarded boomer pensioners who only have chain restaurants and major brands in a 400 mile radius of their location, are not going to spend that much on fruit-flavored coffee.

Secondly, his actual flavor profile is going to be completely unpredictable. This shit is sitting in warehouses for an eternity - I wouldn't be surprised if excess stock from Millcreek was then sold to the white-labeler, so even before sitting on shelves as CBC it's been sitting around a while. It's going to make for extremely inconsistent flavor profiles. My reserve coffee is Eight O'Clock's Original, because it has a smoky profile that hides the fact that the beans have been sitting in warehouses and shelves for weeks. I wouldn't be surprised if the flavored coffees are taken from similar roast profiles but completely different beans, batch-to-batch, because who the fuck cares? Jer certainly doesn't know fucking anything about coffee, since it takes longer to prepare than a redbull.

And lastly, by saying it's "not a political brand," Jer completely fucked the third one. He has no cult of personality, because he has no personality. The only thing he's known for is being that one annoying right-wing guy on youtube that gets recommended constantly until you expressly say 'do not recommend this channel.' Politics was the only fucking thing he had to sell his coffee on, and as BRC has demonstrated politics is a great way to take a mediocre product and turn it into a product sold at an upcharge to a dumbshit audience who thinks that consumption substitutes for political activism. He could have made bank selling a CBC branded "pwn the libs portafilter" to retards who'll use an espresso machine twice before they sell it on facebook marketplace and return to their keurig k-cup machine, but in classic narcissist fashion he decided to compete with the established coffee companies... on the 'merits,' thinking his stuff would win out over them.... because because?

(In mild defense of BRC, if I'm traveling and want a gas-station cold-brew coffee, their shit isn't near as drenched in sugar as alternatives, especially Starbucks.)

 

[Oxyjen]

Most people who want flavored coffee buy specific creamers. Selling flavored coffee was probably a huge misstep.

I’d never heard of flavored coffee grounds before this. It sounds terrible to be honest - flavoured syrup added after brewing is one thing but soaking some chemical oil into the coffee itself is just gross behavior.

 

[Rich Evans Ayypologist]

I’d never heard of flavored coffee grounds before this. It sounds terrible to be honest - flavoured syrup added after brewing is one thing but soaking some chemical oil into the coffee itself is just gross behavior.

Very occasionally, there will be a batch of flavored coffee that isn't actually awful. Some roasters will do a holiday blend that drenches the shit in nutmeg and cinnamon and hazelnut flavors - it's akin to something like eggnog, where it's a very pronounced and strong flavor that's almost a guilty sometimes-indulgence. It also fucks up your grinders something-awful.

But usually, yes, it tastes like complete shit and the flavor profile is flatly disgusting. Many people mix it in with a creamer that already overpowers the flavor anyways, so they don't really notice. The main reason it's done is that the beans being used are close to expiring/rotting, and the oils work as a preservative that give them extended shelf-lives.

 

[PsychoJenny]

To those who don't know, the flavouring on the package is what the coffee will smell and taste like. It's not artificial flavouring. Different roasting methods and beans does this. Luther didn't know what he was talking about.

How do you roast beans to taste like "Blueberry Cobbler"? I actually bought some of that flavour from the one in my post a number of pages back and on the packaging it does in fact say as ingredients "Coffee, Natural/Artificial Flavours" so I'm curious what it is you mean by this because I'm literally looking at what Luther was talking about in my hands. CBC doesn't seem to have any nutritional info or notice that there are artificial flavourings when it should. Can you explain this point more?

 

[FederalInvestigation]

Please dont compare the pepperoni chef to JerjerBinks...
The Gordon Ramsay of basement salami shouldnt be disrespected this way.
The Stalker Prison Warden is actually funny, jer is just an angry cuck who is assmad that people learned his secret.
What JerjerBinks has is bitch blubbers.

Actually his name should be Jeremy Bitch Blubbers.

Fag Flaps. Faggot floppers? Shitbrick Shimmies. Lardass Lumps. Chesticles. Moobs.

Leak the list or youse a bitch.


Hey Wes Watson, you are not agreeing with me at all. I'm saying that the laws need to be tighter so that the women who are being sexually harassed and creepshotted can call the cops on him. I'm not an internet tough guy.

Also, Jeremy is a 6 foot 5 giant. If you didn't know he was a giant baby, would you step to him? And what if he beats you up, is he allowed to harass your woman now?

I agree about better laws against taking random creepshots. It's the weird action of a depraved porn brained coomer. The crazy thing is that Jeremy's video where he's wandering around "keeping it tight", he wouldn't approach or speak to any of those women one on one. He only talks to women he has backed into a corner with money. His wife, his employees, his cohosts. He talks ABOUT other women but he's never talked TO other women. It's fucking weird.

 

[El Chacal De La Trompeta]

This guy does not pass any green line tests in any pictures of him standing upright, wife mogs hes a hog

why is that his whore of a wife always is sticking her butt up in pictures

 

[这次我发誓死不发帖]

He looks like he's about to go full Fat Bastard on Smellonie.

I just call her 'ie Mac (no melons)