A little early but unless Anna is cramming in all the goals in the next four hours, here’s our April recap:
Check in time for Anna’s 2026 goals!
April 2026:
1. Zero hikes featured (2026 total: 0)
2. Zero books read (2026 total: 0)
3. Zero walks with Data (2026 total: 0)
4. Zeros craft projects, finished or otherwise (2026 total: 1) Makeup looks do not count, nor do AI slop songs composed of haterade.
5. Zero travel related events (2026 total: 1) She attended Texas Strongest Man but a three hour drive to Dallas doesn’t seem like the kind of globetrotting we’re used to seeing from past Anna so no, a car ride to Big D for the afternoon doesn’t count.
We have complete a third of the year and of the five “reasonable for even a mentally retarded person to accomplish once a week” goals Anna set for herself, in four months time she’s at two. Not twice in a week, two total.
How can you not take your dog for a fucking walk?