DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[JamFlowMan]

I don't really disagree with him buying a new TV, but how the fuck has Phil been doing this for a solid decade and never changed his TV? Unbelievable. He spends almost no money on his "business". I can't think of any other streamer/YouTuber who lives off it and is so fucking cheap.

When did he get the TV he takes pictures of for Instagram? It is most likely newer then 2009, so he can just swap those two around. At least that is what a person living on a budget with no disposable income would do.

 

[neger psykolog]

When did he get the TV he takes pictures of for Instagram? It is most likely newer then 2009, so he can just swap those two around. At least that is what a person living on a budget with no disposable income would do.

I assume you're talking about the movie TV? That's in his lounge room, but he doesn't play video games on it, because his office is a tax write off or some autistic shit.

His "office" is where he actually does his "job" and keeps all his shit-tier equipment while living a life of luxury outside of it.

 

[Sparkletor]

Phil bashes Google for giving its employees mental health seminars.

Claims everyone who doesn't like him is mentally ill.

Seems like dsp would be an advocate for mental wellness. He'd make more money with less mentally ill idiots on the internet, sounds good?

 

[Coin Ops]

"I don't have any best practices. I just do whatever the fuck happens and pray for the best." -Phil Burnell

PUBG - February 8, 2nd stream commentary

Spoiler

This one is late because I didn't watch it all live and had to wait for the YouTube upload to finish watching the matches.

He often talks about 3 things in PUBG: the M16 and M4 are the only good guns, he never gets good guns, and he is always killed by those guns. So here are some numbers based on his 38 matches from February 4-9: he obtained a "good gun" 50% of the time, and was killed by a "good gun" 18% of the time. His perception of something vs reality is often interesting.


Pregame

• 9:45 and Phil is on the mic.
• He had a redeeming game of UFC3. He sounds genuinely happy. Cool.
• Picked up girlfriend's clothes and computer. She's plays Overwatch. Phil is going to set the computer up before she gets here so she can play Overwatch. I'll admit, that's a nice thing.
• Gives me feels knowing he'll cause me to lose all empathy for him by the end of the stream.
• Self-proclaimed major announcement: subs have dropped significantly to 504. 50-60 subs were gift subs and expired.
• The new deal is at 550 subs this month you get Cooking with the King and his Lady. For 600 you get Patron's Choice of a game.
• Chat overwhelmingly wants Phil to play Final Fantasy 9. Phil acknowledges that and also mentions that Dynasty Warriors 9 and Grand Theft Auto are also on the table.
• He's going to have a lot of time to interact with us tonight because PUBG has a lot of down time. Oh boy.
• Chat asks when he's going to stop playing PUBG for good. He says when either he's so inundated with new releases he can't make time or when people get bored and stop showing up and contributing.

Match 1

• 10:05. Let's do this.
• His internet is the best. It's the game that sucks. He wastes no time.
• Excited to see if there are more M4s and M16s as part of the patch rollback.
• PapaLou got called out in the 1st stream for trying to get another mod shitcanned so he could take the mod's spot.
• Talks about the new Twitch policies. He's pretty well-informed about. Mentions when he trash talks anyone he loses to in a fighting game and asks if that will now constitutes hate speech to Twitch.
• Snuck up on and takes a few hits going into a house. Takes cover and a couple grenades are thrown his way. He avoids them and gunplay ensures.
• Parting shot: "What the fuck?! Did you see that?! Did you see what happened?! My whole character's body did a teleporting glitch and next thing I know I had 75-85% health done and instantly died!" I have to give him credit, the game actually did freeze up for several seconds and (for once) the game did fuck him.
• Place: 38
• Killed by: UMP9
• Guns at time of death: M16 (4x scope)
• Number of kills: 0

Match 2

• Thinks the new Twitch policies will force a lot of titty streamers out. The more popular ones will be able to stay profitable by throwing "pity parties" during their streams where they beg for money. I'd say something about him lacking self-awareness but I know the answer is he's TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
• He's not worried by the new Twitch policies. Acknowledges that he sometimes says stuff in the heat of the moment.

• While looting houses, a guy sneaks up takes him out.
• Parting Shot: "Oh fuck! What the shit?! Okay…I heard no footsteps and apparently the guy must have seen me out of nowhere."
• Place: 74
• Killed by: UMP9
• Guns at time of death: AKM, UMP9
• Number of kills: 0

Match 3

• Talking about needing to save videos to upload to YouTube during his time off: "If I don't upload videos for 4 days, people will be like 'Well Phil's dead. Time to unsubscribe.' That's how ridiculously fickle the YouTube audience is and honestly that's why I don't like YouTube anymore." I like how just lowkey shits on his YouTube viewers and creates a new reasons for not liking YouTube. I thought it was the algorithms?
• "YouTube is a cesspool of toxicity and garbage content."
• He used to drink 4 energy drinks a day. Now he only has 1 a day if he drinks them.
• Hears a dune buggy getting closer while he's covering ground. I get my hopes up for a vehicle death. He avoids the Worthless Humans and my hopes are dashed.
• Steals a jeep when the driver goes into loot a building. Takes shots as he drives off. The patch definitely rolled back the vehicle changes as he takes little damage while fleeing.
• Drives the jeep through a fence longways.
• He's feeling good and happy that the girlfriend is moving in.
• Drives around the edge of the circle for eternity.
• Gets sniped while driving around. Gets out and heals.
• He's swerving around like crazy and complaining about framerate. Hits a tree.
• Tries to hit a Worthless Human with the jeep. Misses and takes fire. Jeep is smoking. Gets out of the jeep. Goes prone. Jeep explodes. Gets shot. Gets shot. Dies.
• Parting Shot: "Couldn't hit him I tried but the framerate's so bad I couldn't control the car."
• Place: 9
• Killed by: SKS
• Weapons at time of death: M16, UMP9, frag grenade
• Number of kills: 0

Match 4

• The Government shut down. Sarcastic seal clap. Throws shade on those Worthless Humans.
• He's far away from the circle. It's going be a marathon.
• In grade school they called him "Phil with the oddly shaped head"
• Brings up the bald spot in the last DSP Tries It. It's not a bald spot, it's his scalp from where it's parted. "Fucking idiots."
• Circle is closing in on the military island.
• This has been one long game of running.
• Swims to the military island. Takes drowning damage and sniper fire.
• Sneaks up on a house he knows someone is in and gets killed. He had the Kar with a 4x scope, so he could have stayed back and sniped.
• Parting Shot: "Not bad considering I had no good weapons. Right? Not bad… What's the sub count?" (It's 506)
• Place: 12
• Killed by: SCAR
• Weapons at time of death: Kar (4x scope), auto-shotgun, flashbang
• Number of kills: 0

Match 5

• Catches a guy and empties a magazine. Accomplishes nothing. Eats a shotgun.
• Parting Shot: "Yeah he killed me at that distance with that gun. This game sucks. Whatever."
• Place: 94
• Killed by: pump shotgun
• Guns at time of death: AKM
• Number of kills: 0

Match 6

• Lands next to someone and gets killed in a fist fight.
• Parting Shot: "ACK ACK ACK so stupid!"
• Place: 94
• Killed by: Fists of Fury
• Weapons at time of death: Noodle arms
• Number of kills: 0

Match 7

• Makes puking noises and says that's who popular streamers do. That and make highlight videos. Chat says he sounds like he's making fun of Dr. Disrespect. He has never watched Dr. Disrespect. He's going to call himself Dr. Vomitorium from now on.
• Gets a dune buggy. Drives around in circles. Takes fire.
• Runs over 3 Worthless Humans.
• Takes fire. 3 of the dune buggy's tires are shot out and it's on fire.
• Take cover behind a tree and is killed.
• Something interesting: while taking cover, a bullet hits the frying pan on his back. You hear the ricochet sound of the bullet hitting the pan and he takes no damage from the shot. That's a neat little detail.
• Parting Shot: "Nothing I could do. There was nowhere to hide."
• Place: 9
• Killed by: AKM
• Weapons at time of death: SCAR, frag grenade
• Number of kills: 3

Postgame

• No commentary because he doesn't upload the postgame stream to YouTube.

• Worthless Humans avoided: 6
• Red zone bombings sat through: 2
• Smug chuckles: 2
• Fences destroyed: 1

 

[Sparkletor]

Phil calling himself Mr vomitorium would be weird. A vomitoriorium was both an entrance and exit like in the colosseum. If it was arched it would be an arcade.

Is Phil saying he is Mr arcade?

I went too much ancient Latin on that one

 

[Prince Lotor]

After years of complaining:

" I HAVE BUSINESS LEVEL INTERNET"

"THIS GAME'S NETCODE IS A PIECE OF SHIT"

"HE ONLY WON BECAUSE HE PULLED THE ONLINE LAGSWITCH BULLSHIT"

"I COULDN'T BLAHK"

"I WAS DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AND I GOT HIT"

"I WAS PRESSING BUTTONS BUT HE HITS REEEE FIRST, FUCK THIS GAME"

Phail finally discovered the hateful truce


View attachment 380290

In every game I see Phil play that displays a connection strength Phil's connection strength is almost always nonexistent.
Does anyone know if Phil even has his router set up for gaming? Does he even know how to change settings on his router? Does he even know routers have settings?

These are the kinds of things that make me think he is legitimately mentally handicapped. He really has convinced himself all of the issues with his internet connection lagging are due the delay on his TV. Like how when my internet has any issues the first thing I do is unplug and plug my TV/Monitor. Seriously what the fuck Phil? What does he think the display delay on those old ass TVs were when he was 'Uhh, former, pro, fighting game champion'? I would look into buying a new router, considering he probably just has whatever the cable company dumped off on him, before a new TV. I'm guessing for Business level internet the router the cable company provides is set in a restricted mode or something.

 

[OneDaySon]

So basically he saw a new TV in the store window and was like "Ohhh that looks nice." and came up with that excuse that he "needs" it just like how he "needed" the 300 dollar headphones

 

[Clop]

Or, you know, save that money and instead just fiddle with the settings on the consoles and the TV so that there's no lag between input and what's shown on screen?

We're going to witness a 'lemon TV' next, aren't we?

 

[neger psykolog]

In every game I see Phil play that displays a connection strength Phil's connection strength is almost always nonexistent.
Does anyone know if Phil even has his router set up for gaming? Does he even know how to change settings on his router? Does he even know routers have settings?

These are the kinds of things that make me think he is legitimately mentally handicapped. He really has convinced himself all of the issues with his internet connection lagging are due the delay on his TV. Like how when my internet has any issues the first thing I do is unplug and plug my TV/Monitor. Seriously what the fuck Phil? What does he think the display delay on those old ass TVs were when he was 'Uhh, former, pro, fighting game champion'? I would look into buying a new router, considering he probably just has whatever the cable company dumped off on him, before a new TV. I'm guessing for Business level internet the router the cable company provides is set in a restricted mode or something.

His internet is shit. It's cable, so its highly possible there is something wrong with not only his connection but his entire neighborhood's connections. Which is his fault for moving into an area with no fiber internet.

I'm also pretty sure he relies on a modem/router that is older than his new girlfriend which is probably the biggest issue.

Or, you know, save that money and instead just fiddle with the settings on the consoles and the TV so that there's no lag between input and what's shown on screen?

We're going to witness a 'lemon TV' next, aren't we?

There are no settings that make a consumer TV react like a "gamer tv". The closest thing you can get is the upcoming BFGD from nVidia which is probably going to cost $3000+

Home/consumer TVs do not offer low latency, its a very niche feature that offers no benefit to 99% of consumers. There might be some that are slightly better than others, but home TVs are not the place to go if you're looking for lower latency.

 

[Clop]

His internet is shit. It's cable, so its highly possible there is something wrong with not only his connection but his entire neighborhood's connections. Which is his fault for moving into an area with no fiber internet.

But Fred! Phil pays a LOT OF MONEY for his Internet(s)! You can't possibly claim that they're bad! That's just stoopid! ACK ACK ACK ACK!

 

[PieceofShet]

Wait... JUST WAIT A FUKIN SECOND!

So... DSP... you tell us... that MAYBE all those times... ALL THOSE TIMES... when you cursed at a game for being laggy and such... maybe... MAYBE IT WAS YOUR TV? AND THOSE GAMES WORKS GOOD? Holy fuckin shit.

Or just talking about his ass to setup a new fundraiser.

Or, you know, save that money and instead just fiddle with the settings on the consoles and the TV so that there's no lag between input and what's shown on screen?

We're going to witness a 'lemon TV' next, aren't we?

But according to dsp, an adult cannot save money over time...

 

[neger psykolog]

But Fred! Phil pays a LOT OF MONEY for his Internet(s)! You can't possibly claim that they're bad! That's just stoopid! ACK ACK ACK ACK!

Most games nowadays tend to rely on peer to peer connections rather than actual servers. Yes, the games still need servers for matchmaking, but when you're actually playing you're playing peer 2 peer in which case its very difficult to gauge connection issues reliably.

On occasion your ISP can have dumb routing for your connection meaning it adds additional lag or puts you through parts of da internet that would otherwise be inefficient (its not a very common occurrence, but it does happen sometimes).

However its impossible to really improve anything if your modems and routers are 30 years old (and that doesn't mean its ok to get a "new" router from your ISP a year ago, because newer models often tend to have better ways of dealing with things and can be a fair bit more reliable)

Obviously DSP is smart so he's probably already looked into all of these things himself.

 

[PieceofShet]

FROM TWITTER (too lazy today)

"Found a really great deal on a 4k HDR 55inch tv with only 14.7ms of input lag, but now I'm not convinced this TV would be better than mine, since I can't find ANY reliable reviews being it's 9 years old, and reviews from 2010 claim it only has 2.4ms of input lag...argh!"

He is looking at this series

HE DOESNT NEED 4K TV AND CERTAINLY DOESNT NEED 120HZ tv.

Spoiler

He has no idea what he is doing.

 

[Clop]

But according to dsp, an adult cannot save money over time...

Obviously DSP is smart so he's probably already looked into all of these things himself.

If Kiwi Farms is building a gigantic death ray powered by lethal amounts of sarcasm, I vehemently agree.

 

[PoopMagnet]

Obviously DSP is smart so he's probably already looked into all of these things himself.

Well obviously he has. I mean, the man has a business degree, so clearly he knows how to look into business related ventures and not just buy the most expensive product because he believes more expensive is better. Surely, this man astute in generating revenue can not only pick out a proper TV (most expensive model) but is also clearly capable of other feats of fiscal prowess like fixing YouTube and proper game marketing (watch out SquareEnix). This man is such a paragon of commerce that he works out of his dirty house, in his dusty room and shows off his kickin-rad game skills to hundreds (hundreds!) of viewers out there.

Yes, sir. DSP is a very, very smart man.

 

[James Smith]

Alright. Whoever has the actual 'tism go find what his girlfriend's PC Overwatch account name is. Time zone was CST.

 

[Hiragana]

FROM TWITTER (too lazy today)

"Found a really great deal on a 4k HDR 55inch tv with only 14.7ms of input lag, but now I'm not convinced this TV would be better than mine, since I can't find ANY reliable reviews being it's 9 years old, and reviews from 2010 claim it only has 2.4ms of input lag...argh!"

He is looking at this series

HE DOESNT NEED 4K TV AND CERTAINLY DOESNT NEED 120HZ tv.

Spoiler

He has no idea what he is doing.

And what console games does he imagine he'll be playing with 4K graphics and 120fps?

 

[neger psykolog]

And what console games does he imagine he'll be playing with 4K graphics and 120fps?

I think he's just realizing that playing an FPS game on a PC and not with a controller from a fucking "loveseat" is far easier.

 

[CausticMinory]

Alright. Whoever has the actual 'tism go find what his girlfriend's PC Overwatch account name is. Time zone was CST.View attachment 380336

This nigga is about to steal his soulmaid computer to stream PC games isn't he? If he actually plays them of course.

 

[PoopMagnet]

View attachment 380336

"I also played CS:GO on my real life girlfriend's PC as well and now top ranked player. Trust me not just making this up folks." --DSP's next tweet

I mean sure it's not implausible for him to have a good game, but it's hard to really trust hin on his word when he'll fabricate or fib about something that we can see on his stream. I just don't think he gets why people can't give him the benefit of the doubt. Something about crying wolves or some shit.