- Joined
- Dec 22, 2017
"Guess who's back? Big Philly Blunt." -Phil Burnell
That's right, he's back from time off and ready to autorun across the map. Let's do this.
PUBG - February 19, 2nd stream commentary
That's right, he's back from time off and ready to autorun across the map. Let's do this.
PUBG - February 19, 2nd stream commentary
Pregame
Match 1
Match 2
Match 3
Match 4
Match 5
Match 6
Match 7
Postgame
- He rage quit DBZ for the second time earlier today so I'm looking forward to a super salty night of PUBG.
- I also heard he is drinking during this stream, so what little filter he has should be gone.
Match 1
- Kat does not play PUBG. She watched Phil play it and asked why he continues to play it. He doesn't play it for the gameplay. He plays it for the "interactions"
- His laptop is fucking up. The brightness is alternating between min and max settings. Here comes the next fundraiser. #savethelaptop
- Performs triage on the laptop (puts it in sleep mode) and this fixes it. He was really worried for a minute about not being able to see chat me$$ages
- He's drinking out of a coffee mug. Gin?
- He doesn't talk about work with Kat. He talks with her about what they're going to eat.
- Down to 30 players. He's ran across the entire map (no vehicle). Kill me.
- He's reading chat messages without 50bicheers attached to them. He must be drinking.
- Top 10. He flawlessly executes his late-game strategy: hiding behind a rock hoping no one sees him.
- Empties a magazine worth of single shots at a guy who doesn't see where Phil is hiding. Still cannot hit a predominantly stationary target that is not shooting back. Guess how this ends? The guy figures out where Phil is and easily kills him.
- Parting shot: "I couldn't hit him a single time. I couldn't hit him a single FUCKING time. And the guy didn't even aim, he just sprayed."
- Place: 9
- Killed by: SCAR
- Weapons at time of death: M4, Mini14, flashbang
- Number of kills: 0
Match 2
- Says you have to be a fucking idiot to play PUBG on Xbox One. This is exactly what he is doing.
- User fjresto asks Phil if he can gift him Skyrim on PS4 to play during downtime next week. Phil responds as only Phil can, saying that he would redeem the code and hang onto it in case peepul eventually want to see him play it. I like how he skirts around not honoring the guy's intent of playing it for enjoyment during downtime. This is the man that just wants to play games and have fun (as long as it's profitable).
- He's parking a car by a building and a guy jumps out from behind a corner and lights him up. Phil drives around the buildings for a bit, taking fire the entire time. Then he gets out of the car and gunplay ensues. He shoots a beautiful point-blank silhouette around the guy before dying.
- Parting shot: "I couldn't! Dude the entire time I was moving right on the joystick (holds up joystick) and it wouldn't go right!"
- Place: 64
- Killed by: M4
- Guns at time of death: SCAR, UMP9
- Number of kills: 0
Match 3
- Says 3 million peepul play this game because the developers didn't improve it ??? Definitely drinking.
- User infinite_55 asks if Phil would play Assassin's Creed Rogue Remastered if he bought it for him. There's suddenly a bunch of new games coming out and Phil can't commit to anything. New games include: Sea of Thieves, Word Salad 2, A Way Out, and Far Cry 5. He may play it EVENTUALLY so definitely buy it for him.
- Shits on Ubisoft for not staggering their game releases to better align with his streaming schedule. "Completely dumb idiots."
- He's landing exactly where he landed last game. #redemptionrun
- Gets a car. Hits a house. Takes a sip.
- Drives across the landscape, taking fire and avoiding Worthless Humans.
- Walks in a room. Sees a guy. Empties magazine and gets a kill. "Oh my god! What a fucking idiot! He's camping in here like a dumb pussy and I fucking blew his face off! What a moron!"
- Loots the dumb pussy and then CAMPS IN THE SAME ROOM. Eventually a guy walks in and headshots him.
- Parting shot: "Explain that! I fired first! I fired directly into his body and I die first! This game is terrible dude!" The guy got a headshot, that's why you died first. The game even tells you it was a headshot. "I played it 100% correctly: waiting it out, being patient (sounds like camping), saw him first, fired first. I die! This game sucks!"
- Place: 39
- Killed by: SCAR
- Guns at time of death: M16, Mini14
- Number of kills: 1 (but it was completely unearned because the guy was a dumb pussy)
Match 4
- Lands at hospital. Can't find any good guns. Grandpa's grumpy.
- Loads up on ammo and mall ninja gun attachments.
- Runs across the landscape on foot. Again.
- He hates that he has to move because of the circle mechanic. His ideal game would be hiding in a room for 30 minutes while people give him quarters.
- Asked if he would play an older Fallout or Elder Scrolls game. "No one wants to see old games."
- Gets killed…somehow. It doesn't matter. None of this matters.
- Parting shot: "Once again, all that work for absolutely nothing. A waste of my fucking time."
- Place: 20
- Killed by: M16
- Guns at time of death: M16, Kar (4x scope), frag grenade
- Number of kills: 0
Match 5
- Lands at the military base. Immediately finds a jeep. Hears a Worthless Human in the distance. Flees the military base without even looking for a gun. Immediately crashes into a metal fence post.
- Arguing with the troll tipper over whether he gets to keep the troll tips or not.
- Flips the jeep while driving in a straight line over open ground.
- Crashes into a concrete barrier while reading chat. He's killed in the explosion.
- Parting shot: "That game was a bust anyway. I wanted to land at the military base but couldn't, so it was a complete waste of time to keep playing." No idea what he's talking about because he did land at the military base.
- Killed by: Himself
- Place: 75
- Guns at time of death: None
- Kills: 0
Match 6
- Stares at crotch. Probably tweeting.
- Troll keeps tipping $5 to insult Phil. Truly exceptional.
- Time to sit through another red zone bombing.
- Revenge of the blue circle. Run Phil, run.
- Phil relentlessly makes fun of the troll. It's actually pretty funny because the troll is staggeringly exceptional.
- Drives a car. Runs into a boulder.
- We're in Phil's mid-game: driving around the circle In a smoking, flaming vehicle while taking fire.
- Runs into a picnic table. Health is down to 25% from cumulative collisions.
- Opens a door and eats lead.
- Parting shot: "I knew it! I knew there would be someone there!"
- Killed by: SCAR
- Place: 18
- Guns at time of death: M4
- Kills: 0
Match 7
- Chat asks about his PUBG strategy: "My strategy is to complain that the game sucks...and to lose."
- Makes fun of the troll some more.
- Swims across the landscape.
- Guy in a boat rolls up on him, gets out and takes cover behind the boat. Phil sprays wildly, then dies.
- Parting shot: "Annoying because I have no mid-range weapon and no way to fight this guy." Said after spraying with the SKS and neglecting to use his frag grenade.
- Killed by: M4
- Place: 51
- Guns at time of death: SKS, frag grenade
- Kills: 0
Postgame
- Red zone bombings sat through: 3
- Worthless Humans avoided: 4
- Sips taken: 5
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