What's the most lewd, creepy or cringey thing your partner has asked you? - Clingyness, bizarre fetishes, outright creepy stuff

What was your experience like?

  • I got molested by a retard at school

    Votes: 35 27.1%
  • I married my stalker / an outright insane person

    Votes: 14 10.9%
  • My partner pulled out some very freaky sex stuff

    Votes: 50 38.8%
  • They tried to put something my ass/asked to put something in their ass

    Votes: 30 23.3%

  • Total voters
    129
I wish it had just been hugging. He nicknamed himself the pimp. He had a rapist smile, and on the last day of my junior year was caught in the boys bathroom with his forcing his more exceptional brother to give him a blow job. The school kept quit about it because that year that had had a scandal with a coach sleeping with some of the girls of the dance team, and didn't want to look worse.
Holy shit dude. Worst it got for me was this girl trying to follow me home. For about a week I had to invent a new shortcut to get away.

Once I hid in the bed of a pickup for about 45 minutes to hide from her. Thanks for the idea, Metal Gear Solid.
 
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It was online, but, basically, a guy whom I had a pretty great relationship with (like "would date/fuck if we lived closer") randomly asumed that I want to have sex with my mom after I complained about her saying fucked-up shit to me.

Note that he knew that I have a pretty bad relationship with her and that I am straight.
 
Just Google "urethral sounding".

Same guy. I was young and really inexperienced. He wanted me to go down on him and I stopped because I saw some....stuff down there.

"Oh that's just dick cheese."
When he saw the horrified look on my face, he said "....you want me to go wash it off?"
And that was my first and last experience with smegma. I was so confused and disgusted.
 
Same guy. I was young and really inexperienced. He wanted me to go down on him and I stopped because I saw some....stuff down there.

"Oh that's just dick cheese."
When he saw the horrified look on my face, he said "....you want me to go wash it off?"
And that was my first and last experience with smegma. I was so confused and disgusted.

I gotta thank him for giving my SO and I a funny inside joke though. He thought it was the funniest thing ever when I told him so now we'll casually say things like "oh that's just cream cheese" in the same manner if we're talking about food or something. Absolutely disgusting.
 
Yep, feel free to share
To make a long story short, if your business partner ever tells you that the petty cash you need is in his asshole, and you don’t find it after rooting around for a solid ten minutes, it’s pretty much a guarantee that one or both of you is a sexual deviant who has no business running a bakery.
 
a fat, very english-impaired korean dental student tried to set me up with her gaysian best friend. of course since i am violently homophobic that didnt work out.

as a side note my ex-gf kept wanting me to spank her but i just couldnt bring myself to, it was just too freaky. word to the wise, persian girls are fucking crazy, pretty hairy too.
 
So what I get from this thread is there's a lot of people out there that don't know how to communicate about sex, and just like to sneak fetishes in there like some sort of freaky prize in a cereal box.

You are right, I'd like to hear stories about what happened to fellow Kiwis and their partners (as in the title), so let's keep on with the topic and not derail.

I have to say most of the Kiwis shared quite good stories. Also, it can be not just about sex, but overall creepy and unusual stuff too.
 
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My husband talks in his sleep in German sometimes. I mean he talks in his sleep every night. Every so often I'll wake up to "Der deutsche Mann, Der deutsche Mann, Ja, so ist es, FUCK YOU! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" He's not German, I think his great grandfather was. That's about as creepy as he gets.
 
Sex on a roller coaster. It's as good as they say. Admittedly it took a couple attempts to get it right, but you work at the park and control the ride so it's not a huge deal. The hard part is approximating a simultaneous climax when you're going down the big hill. Got that to work once. Stayed with her until an (unrelated, non-roller coaster) accident took her away.

Shame the 80s are never coming back. :feels:
 
If you want a crazy story strap in. Dated this one chick... holy shit... Every time.. EVERY time we went to a restaurant it took her 20 minutes to order AND she was vegan or whatevz... She'd always try to make me pick what she ate.. then would disagree when I instantly answered cuz how hard is it to order from a menu. She also acted like she owned all my time, and made me go to gay ass farmers markets at like 9 am on a weekend. What the fuck. She was also way too into arts and crafts... Yea she was a wild one.
 
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