LGBT Chris buys some things from the HRC store, and a Stop Bullying Bracelet.

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Guys, he found the bracelet. Rip cwcki

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Is he parked in a handicapped space? Since when does Autism mean that one has difficulty walking?
Apologies if someone explained this, but I don't have it in me to look through 7 pages to look. Anyways, Virginia is one of only a few states that gives handicap licenses to people with autism. Or rather, the parents and caretakers of the severely autistic. The theory is that if the child (or adult autistic child) starts to tard rage and tantrum while out that the parents can get them out and into the car quickly without having to drag them through the parking lot. Naturally it should only be Barb and Bob who be granted the handicap spot for that reason, but for some dumb reason the state of Virginia granted Chris this right, despite being the one who'd be dragged back to the car, in theory. And it's his license because he was using the handicap spaces back when Son-Chu was still around.
 
So, just found out about his latest photo...

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...and... I just... I really don't try to make fun people's appearances. I really, really don't. But I'm almost in tears here. Not from laughing, mind you. This just hurts so badly I'm in tears.

His receding hairline has receded so far that it's about to merge with the growing bald spot on the back of his head. How is he going to manage the whole tomgirl thing when that happens? Do a sassy comb-over? Purchase a wig?
 
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Chris realizes HRC is a big supporter of gay marriage, right? I've followed Chris for about 6 years now and I have no idea the mental gymnastics involved that suggests that he can support a huge supporter of gay rights and somehow still hate male homosexuals in the process. I mean I can usually follow his usual mental gymnastics but this is like, pure doublethink. It's like being a member of the KKK but supporting the NAACP while still hating black people.

I think one day he's going to have sex with another man and he'll have some weird justification that he's not "really" gay because he's transgendered or whatever.

This actually was brought up on PVCC, where someone made a point that Chris could legitimately be transgendered, he just has no fucking clue what it actually involves or what it really means.
 
Chris realizes HRC is a big supporter of gay marriage, right? I've followed Chris for about 6 years now and I have no idea the mental gymnastics involved that suggests that he can support a huge supporter of gay rights and somehow still hate male homosexuals in the process. I mean I can usually follow his usual mental gymnastics but this is like, pure doublethink. It's like being a member of the KKK but supporting the NAACP while still hating black people.

I think his views are evolving. His hypocrisy is bottomless and his views are certainly rigid, but he's been known to change his mind. He will never stop being nauseous at the sight of male torsos, but he might be able to wrap his head around the concept of "equal rights," especially if it means hopeful access to lesbian pussy. I bet if you asked him he would say he supports gay marriage now. He wouldn't be the only American who's recently made a swift reversal on this issue.

On the other hand, his misandry is pretty deeply ingrained, so maybe doublethink is the best way to describe it.
 
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I bet they are so proud to have such an appealing advocate...

Holy crap; is that a Wii Fit pedometer? I bet that's gotten about as much use as a solar-powered night light.

I'm surprised Chris went into the whole Wii Fit thing considering 1) his laziness and 2) never acknowledging that he may be overweight.
 
His receding hairline has receded so far that it's about to merge with the growing bald spot on the back of his head. How is he going to manage the whole tomgirl thing when that happens? Do a sassy comb-over? Purchase a wig?

His hair will look like Hulk Hogan's, except greasy and disheveled. If he hung out with more gay people they'd at least tune him into this thing called "conditioner".
 
Chris realizes HRC is a big supporter of gay marriage, right? I've followed Chris for about 6 years now and I have no idea the mental gymnastics involved that suggests that he can support a huge supporter of gay rights and somehow still hate male homosexuals in the process. I mean I can usually follow his usual mental gymnastics but this is like, pure doublethink. It's like being a member of the KKK but supporting the NAACP while still hating black people.
Or demanding to be given special treatment for your autism, while viewing the severely autistic as "windows to hell" and accusing those with Asperger's of "stealing the limelight." Double-standards for Chris are, well, standard.

Holy crap; is that a Wii Fit pedometer? I bet that's gotten about as much use as a solar-powered night light.

I'm surprised Chris went into the whole Wii Fit thing considering 1) his laziness and 2) never acknowledging that he may be overweight.
Influence of the latest sweetheart perhaps?
 
His receding hairline has receded so far that it's about to merge with the growing bald spot on the back of his head. How is he going to manage the whole tomgirl thing when that happens? Do a sassy comb-over? Purchase a wig?

The Goodwill always seems to have a few wigs. Taking bets on how badly Chris hurts himself gluing a wig to his head.
 
I still don't buy any of this "male lesbian" shit. If he actually cared about the LBGT cause than he would have taken the time to gain, at the very least, a cursory understanding of it.

Chris couldn't be bothered to gain a cursory understanding of Pokemon. What would make you think he would try at anything ever?
 
Influence of the latest sweetheart perhaps?

Maybe. But in the decades Chris has been on his love quest I don't think he's ever sat down and thought "what am I bringing to the table in a relationship, what can I do to be more appealing to women?" In his mind women should fall in love with him just because he's Chris.

The only way I could see Chris trying to get in shape for a sweetheart is if they straight out tell him "I'll only date you if you lose x amount weight". Even then I'm not sure what would win out; Chris' desire for china or hatred of work. He could just as easily come to the conclusion that any true sweetheart wouldn't ever expect him to do anything and decide it's not worth it.
 
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