Money Financhu Crisis / Chris sells his stuff megathread

What's your favourite Chris excuse for wanting money?


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WHY do people want to help this guy? It baffles and offends me.

There's people with lots of money out there who enjoy the Chris saga. Everyone thinks the people who buys that stuff are basement dwellers with their own tugboats, but there's definitely well to do people who enjoy laughing at his shenanigans. If the money dries up the monkey may stop dancing.
 
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Her head is bigger than her legs...

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Oh God, are those five cans of the really cheap licensed energy drinks you can buy at Hot Topic? Isn't it like really unhealthy to drink one of those, let alone five?

Reminds me of an episode from 1,000 Ways to Die involving excess consumption of energy drinks. It didn't even mention other things like diabetes since heart damage is just the surface of excess consumption of energy drinks.
 
WHY do people want to help this guy? It baffles and offends me.
I genuinely think its mostly a counterpoint to all the people that fuck with Chris. If kiwi farms, and Hirtes and all the wannabe trolls disappeared tomorrow, his "fanbase" would start to melt away without anyone to rally against. They'd only be left with Chris and his stupid decisions.

I mean, he doesn't even treat them well. Constantly forgetting to mail out there purchases and making snarky little comments about their fan art..
 
"Do not bend" and "fragile" are definitely proper packing methods. That machine sorter is going to be extra careful with the letters. The non-machinable stuff will be handled very cautiously because the postal service is only carrying like 3 parcels at a time.
Or it could be Bob always had them on because he was already aging when Chris was born, and his hearing started to go? I think this one has to be filed under unknowable for now.
Some people prefer them on. When I watch TV through computer, I always have them on. It is just easier. I got hearing like a python, too. I am surprised that so many people think that it is weird.
Basically he doesn't know business works.
It is the worst Ponzi scheme in history. Contrary to what some well-meaning but thoroughly wrong people insist, Chris has no understanding of even the most basic accounting.
 
Well, this confirms there is more than one cat again.

Pollo died and Sorbet ran away, leaving Lucy the old cat around. Did Sorbet return or did they get a new kitten?

As for the dogs, don't they just eat chicken noodle soup? I'm sure if they keep looking, they will find a very cheap brand.
 
How many cats do they have left now? 2? 1?
Well, this confirms there is more than one cat again.

Pollo died and Sorbet ran away, leaving Lucy the old cat around. Did Sorbet return or did they get a new kitten?

As for the dogs, don't they just eat chicken noodle soup? I'm sure if they keep looking, they will find a very cheap brand.
They sell chicken noodle soup at the dollar store. It's filled to the brim with sodium and other heart-stopping ingredients, but the dogs are miserable anyways.
 
Every cent Miss Cherry sent went to Bronycon merch. He didn't even have $100 in his checking when he left the con, and subsequently got standed at Sheetz on his way home.

I helped him in that situation because he was genuinely stuck. But this? No. I didn't even know during the breakdown that every cent went to the con.. I thought some went to bills, etc.

If I had known it didn't go to bills during the breakdown I would've said "Call your mother, explain everything, I can't help."
 
If it's true, then I really feel bad for the animals. They already have to live in a shitty, unsanitary place... But with no food? Just give them to somebody that will take care of them and that will not struggle to feed them. God damn it Chris! People needs to learn that if you don't have money, you can't have animals. They're living creatures, they need food, toys, they can be sick and veterinary bills are expensive as fuck, etc.
I honestly care more about animals than humans. And it makes me mad.
 
Every cent Miss Cherry sent went to Bronycon merch. He didn't even have $100 in his checking when he left the con, and subsequently got standed at Sheetz on his way home.

I helped him in that situation because he was genuinely stuck. But this? No. I didn't even know during the breakdown that every cent went to the con.. I thought some went to bills, etc.

If I had known it didn't go to bills during the breakdown I would've said "Call your mother, explain everything, I can't help."
I could have told you that, literally thousands of dollars were wasted by Chris on overpriced junk.
 
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