حلال LagoonaBlue / Harriet Louise Connor / BendyRuler / erapony / HazzaScottish / Hazza Jermface / erajermface / imeverypony - Big titty, fat trollshielding brony with Jontron, Rick, and karate fetishes, disgusting nymphomaniac bunny boiler and child hater

would you sniff lagoona's pony panties?

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After everything I've just read, I only have one bit of advice to @LagoonaBlue. If you're gonna flick your bean to an online reviewer, don't settle for a literal neckbeard. Have some standards and fap to ReviewBrah like the rest of us normal folks.

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This is what a real man looks like, sweetheart.
 
After everything I've just read, I only have one bit of advice to @LagoonaBlue. If you're gonna flick your bean to an online reviewer, don't settle for a literal neckbeard. Have some standards and fap to ReviewBrah like the rest of us normal folks.

781073642ab03d4933523bd73186892c.gif


This is what a real man looks like, sweetheart.

Reviewbrah is the only youtuber deserving of an erotic fic composed in rhyme. But if it’s anything less than Evangeline in length and meter, you will have failed.
 
Caught up on the thread. I always figured Lagoona was just a goofball with some weird crushes. Honestly, the dumb fanfic and the hilarious porn drawings and whatnot are forgivable. Standard goofy autistic fangirl shit, though her lack of self-awareness about it is damning (for real, that fucking drawing of Rick with a boner is legit hilarious). The A-Logging though? No thank you.

Even worse is that I now know that she's Scottish but she doesn't type in a Scottish accent like Scottish Twitter, and that's the most disappointing thing of all.
 
reading through, I was thinking this too

autistic girls with daddy issues are very easy for men to manipulate to get sex. she might actually like sex, or she might just have opportunistic people coaxing it out of her by giving her attention, and then she doesn't even notice she's been used... it's not a pleasant thing to see.
See, I don't even think it goes that deep. To me it looks like she's taken the Pixyteri approach: she's fat, unattractive, obnoxious, and has the sex drive of a fourteen year old so she posts lewds online and opens up to anyone she meets. That way she kills two birds with one stone, she gets laid and she gets to fool herself into thinking she's some kind of sex goddess drowning in male admiration.

That is to say, if the guys she fools around with are using her, it looks like she's kinda using them too.
 
Obviously if the abuse claims are true that's horrible, I just have a hard time believing them to not be exaggerated when she didn't even remotely allude to it at first. At first she claimed mods had told her she shouldn't get a thread, then she said everything is old and refutable (but refused to refute it, as evidenced by her threadban still being in place), then said that normalcy doesn't exist, and when all of the above (and maybe something more I forgot about) didn't work, she started to say she'll be beaten and homeless all of a sudden.

Also, obviously, the uncovered tweets and such that this is something she apparently regularly says when stuff gets too hot to handle.

That doesn't mean it can't be true, and again, it's terrible if it is, but it reads more like a last ditch effort after everything else blew up in her face.
 
She reminds me a lot of Ruby "The hole" from Ross's thread. I guess lusting after JonTron is slightly better than lusting after the Amazing Atheist at least?

Going to have to agree with everyone else about the abuse claims not quite adding up. The big one for me was the tweet chain talking about her dad hitting her head, someone telling her to go to the police, then her responding she couldn't call the police because her head hurt too much or her vision was blurry or something, followed by requesting said person to DM her. Even ignoring the obvious bullshit of somehow being incapable of dialing whatever Scottish 911 is but being able to carry on a Twitter thread/DM conversation, the excuse wasn't something like "I can't because I'll end up homeless" or "the cops won't do anything and will just make it worse." It seemed like the implication was she needed help to deal with the situation, but obviously there was no real effort made to actually do something.

She also talks about having a job, and being responsible while saving up for plushies and other crap like that. Someone who was genuinely being abused and almost murdered like she claims wouldn't be saving up to buy toys, they'd be saving up to move out. It's one thing when you occasionally purchase something for yourself even when you're in debt or whatever because you need something to help you decompress and stay sane, but it really becomes harder to justify that sort of behavior if you're apparently living with someone who consistently tries to murder/beat you. Real abuse victims would absolutely do everything in their power to get out of that situation. They wouldn't delay it because they wanted toys. Not without having something severely wrong with them, and while she's pretty open about the 'tism, it doesn't seem like she's that deep in she'd prioritize toys over her safety. I have a feeling the "abuse" amounts to her dad telling her to get a job, get off of the computer and go outside, etc. If her dad really was as abusive as she claims and was trying to kill her, it's pretty weird he'd continue to waste money supporting her well into adulthood.

To top it off, you tend to see a lot of these abuse claims in certain (most) tumblr circles, and it's pretty clear Lagoona is the type of person to frequent these communities, so it wouldn't exactly be out of character to make up abuse claims for attention. It also seems doubly weird that she was trying to "help" Chris by spewing the same stuff her abusive parents tell her, especially when she pretty obviously looks down on Chris with the constant "at least I'm not Chris" posts. You don't say that about someone you want to help or see improve, you say that about someone you think is a trainwreck and beneath you.
 
I admit, I have a bit of a soft spot for cows that end up unintentionally creating their own thread. It's got to suck to suddenly have all of your dirty laundry aired for everyone to laugh at. That said, I also can't stand the sort of people who take the fun out of shitposting by making things personal. Most of us laugh at lolcows because we find their antics amusing to varying degrees. @LagoonaBlue laughs at them because it makes her feel like she's one rung higher on the social ladder, and there's nothing more pathetic than a person who sets out to find people to look down on.
 
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I'm betting that her abuse claims are made up, if not greatly exaggerated, too. There are so many lolcows out there who've tried to grasp for sympathy by going, "It's not MY fault I act so fucking absurd; I was beat as a kid/manipulated by my dad/brainwashed by wild Jews" or whatever Tragic Backstory they try to throw in. There's no amount of kid beating that would cause someone to willingly liveblog their farts and wanks on a public Twitter account.
 
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Harriet Connor and the Trials of College:

Watch Harriet as she struggles to keep focused on her lectures!
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Follow Harriet's mother as she has to show up in front of her Course Leader!
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See how Harriet tries to get her mum to talk to her lecturer!
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"Showing her up" meant her mum made a fool of her, not that she had to appear in front of the course leader
 
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