Joshua Wise & Stephen Boyd The Chris-Chan Extortionists - and the End of Evangelion

[BeanBidan]

Why couldn't he be obsessed with aliens. They're a lot more realistic, and we could have gotten a self-induced anal probe out of it. Why do I have the feeling that long after Chris is dead, someone will make a major motion picture based on his life?

Don't tempt M.Night shamalamadong

 

[Marvin]

Why couldn't he be obsessed with aliens. They're a lot more realistic, and we could have gotten a self-induced anal probe out of it. Why do I have the feeling that long after Chris is dead, someone will make a major motion picture based on his life?

He'll just add aliens into the mix on top of everything else.

"hmm, aliens, dats a good idea. yep, so now ET is my next wife"

 

[Snuckening]

Is the comparison not apt?

Chris is not planning on getting a new car, because he'll have magic when the rapture comes.

Chris is trying to borrow money on cwcville's coffers, because after the rapture he'll have a bajillion c and w quarters or some shit.

It's the autistic version of selling all your possessions and moving to a compound in the desert.

Was it a financially viable option for Chris to get a new car, anyway? Post-hoc rationalization =/= "cause".

And Chris makes a desperate, insanely futile demand for $$ out of thin air- what else is new? This is no more unrealistic than him dictating terms to the CEO of Nintendo, or demanding the corner office from Sega, or expecting Patrion to give him a quarter million dollars, or organizing his lesbian staff of dating consultants, or a dozen other varieties of never-gonna-happen insanity that Chris has pulled out of his butthole over the years. Give it 6 months and there'll be another one, then another after that. Isn't that why we're all here?


Who's the "cult leader" here, anyway? All these ideas are 90%+ Chris's own construction- if anything, these hangers-on have just tweaked the details of Chris's own ideas. Chris is the only one with the power to hire/fire "cultists", the arbiter of what is/isn't legit cult doctrine, and undeniably the most powerful, influential shot-caller in this "cult".

Chris is Jim Jones, here- not the poor hapless victim drinking the koolade.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

He'll just add aliens into the mix on top of everything else.

"hmm, aliens, dats a good idea. yep, so now ET is my next wife"

I'm waiting for Chris to brag about how during the dimension merge, Beavis & Butthead are trying to score with him.

 

[Marvin]

Was it a financially viable option for Chris to get a new car, anyway? Post-hoc rationalization =/= "cause".

Was what? Chris has ways of getting a new car, he's just chosing to forgo them.

And Chris makes a desperate, insanely futile demand for $$ out of thin air- what else is new? This is no more unrealistic than him dictating terms to the CEO of Nintendo, or demanding the corner office from Sega, or expecting Patrion to give him a quarter million dollars, or organizing his lesbian staff of dating consultants, or a dozen other varieties of never-gonna-happen insanity that Chris has pulled out of his butthole over the years.

No, it's factually more unrealistic.

Who's the "cult leader" here, anyway? All these ideas are 90%+ Chris's own construction- if anything, these hangers-on have just tweaked the details of Chris's own ideas. Chris is the only one with the power to hire/fire "cultists", the arbiter of what is/isn't legit cult doctrine, and undeniably the most powerful, influential shot-caller in this "cult".

Chris is Jim Jones, here- not the poor hapless victim drinking the koolade.

Well if we want to get down deep into the cult leader analogy, to be more precise, it's like the people talking to Gail Chord Schuler pretending to be Brent Spiner or people talking to Terry A Davis pretending to be CIA niggers. Chris has committed self harm, by slicing up his taint, because of his magical beliefs.

These are seriously mentally damaged people.

 

[Jarilo182]

Why couldn't he be obsessed with aliens. They're a lot more realistic, and we could have gotten a self-induced anal probe out of it.

Don't tempt M.Night shamalamadong

He'd probably end up in a similar situation to Kyle Odom, but at least Kyle held jobs in the past and got degrees before he went crazy.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

These are seriously mentally damaged people.

So are we going to have a thread two months from now after they manage to get CWC in even more trouble and everyone wonders why nobody did anything instead of just naming and shaming them now so they might get driven off? I don't think either solution will do much but I too have to wonder what the point of holding onto that information is if it can't be used to make them fuck off.

 

[Marvin]

So are we going to have a thread two months from now after they manage to get CWC in even more trouble and everyone wonders why nobody did anything instead of just naming and shaming them now so they might get driven off? I don't think either solution will do much but I too have to wonder what the point of holding onto that information is if it can't be used to make them fuck off.

We don't necessarily know who's doing what.

 

[Done]

I'm not gonna quote posts because that would take up too much time. I personally think the fact that Chris is dumb, deluded and retarded doesn't make him any less of a victim of gangstalking. But then again, he has had methods of fending off a lot of it.. Which he (explicitly or implicitly) rejected because he's dumb, deluded and retarded.

On one hand, Chris's privacy and sense of trust has been fully nuked by now, and it's not through his own actions, I mean ask yourself this:

• How many cows we cover here had people come up to them, act like their friends/girlfriends for months at a time, only to turn out to be trolls?
  
• How many cows here had people sifting through their burned down houses and their garbage cans?
  
• How many cows had people buy stuff from them to start a retarded catfishing scheme?
  
• How many cows had a troll embed themselves in their friends list for fucking years before sweethearting them?

Hell, Chris can't even trust people he's known since childhood, fucking Joshua Martinez, a person he knew since his Madison University speech therapy days, not only participated in the trolling (in fact, he is the 1st person to ever try the Sweetheart thing, way back in the Megan days), but also tried to scam him for money too.

TL;DR1: Chris is being gangstalked. It's essentially the internet's version of the Papparazzi.
------

Now let's take the 2nd part of my argument: Chris does indeed bring a not-insignificant part of it on himself.. By being himself. He just tends to attract negative attention by being himself.

There are a few examples of this:

• Brian Silva didn't show that he knew much about Chris's meme existence, or about the entire concept, he just took a photo of a weirdo who he saw at his therapist's office.
• Anna McLerran may be known as an insufferable hag who uses Chris for her personal attention, but I don't think that she initially wrote about him because of that, she literally saw a weird person pacing the mall she worked at while playing his Game Boy Advance and being creepy/funny around women.

Chris's sense of what normal people do is also completely out of whack too, he has the weirdest responses to any kind of stimulus, this is the person who thinks that someone being nice to him in a business-transaction sense would be up to take his pony sex art commission in less than a month. This is the kind of person who thought it's a good idea to give your internet trolls hand-drawn art of him fingering his then-best friend. As such, people will always want to see what he's up to, people would stop watching Chris if he wasn't interesting in some way.

TL;DR2: Chris is the internet version of say, the Jersey Shore people, he attracts negative attention by way he acts in public or on the internet (obviously he didn't get to monetize as much those people did), and his reactions to trolls. And unless he changes his ways and starts gaining some perspective on what's normal or not. the internet paparazzi will just keep following him around until he dies. I don't think he is capable of doing so at this point, and it certainly sucks for him, but it is what it is..

 

[DeathHeat]

Guess it's back to Sonichu dot com to figure out the fuck is going on.

 

[GypsyBard]

Ok real talk here I think at this point the best thing for Chris is to be put in a group home so he can be safe and secure. We had fun seen Chris do some crazy things but now I think the ride is close to being over I mean he is in debt and is getting taken advantage of. He is also proven to be a danger to himself.

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

Who's the "cult leader" here, anyway?

The Disney Afternoon is leading this mob.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

Ok real talk here I think at this point the best thing for Chris is to be put in a group home so he can be safe and secure. We had fun seen Chris do some crazy things but now I think the ride is close to being over I mean he is in debt and is getting taken advantage of. He is also proven to be a danger to himself.

It's not exactly revolutionary here to say he'd be better off in a group home, but it doesn't mean much because you can't "be put in a group home" against your will without very good reason in the US. Rubes get taken advantage of all the time, and Chris is not a danger to himself in a legal sense. People ride motorcycles without helmets, do hard drugs, go base-jumping, and work on oil rigs. Chris fucked up with putting a coffeemaker in the bathroom, eats unhealthy crap and is probably taking titty skittles with little regard for the side-effects. If you're gonna institutionalize people for bad choices, you've got a long list to go before Chris.

 

[Stephanie Bustcakes]

Ok real talk here I think at this point the best thing for Chris is to be put in a group home so he can be safe and secure.

Do you know the extent to which trolls will go through to get to Chris? Chris is not guaranteed to be safe and secure in a group home. I wouldn't even be surprised if a troll got a job as an employee at his group home so they could mess with him.

 

[GypsyBard]

It's not exactly revolutionary here to say he'd be better off in a group home, but it doesn't mean much because you can't "be put in a group home" against your will without very good reason in the US. Rubes get taken advantage of all the time, and Chris is not a danger to himself in a legal sense. People ride motorcycles without helmets, do hard drugs, go base-jumping, and work on oil rigs. Chris fucked up with putting a coffeemaker in the bathroom, eats unhealthy crap and is probably taking titty skittles with little regard for the side-effects. If you're gonna institutionalize people for bad choices, you've got a long list to go before Chris.

We have a whole website meticulously dictating how Chris is a danger to himself and others I mean he cut open his taint for God sakes

 

[Snuckening]

OMFG "Gangstalking" is not a thing.

People here are mis-using the term; no sane person could believe that real "gangstalking" is a thing.

Real "Gangstalking" is a delusion, comparable to belief in crack bugs or Capgras syndrome, used by the (literally, clinically) mentally ill, to explain how they totally aren't mentally ill. Chris's trolls aren't "gangstalkers", because Chris's trolls actually exist.

Being a half-assed "internet celebrity" (because you really really want to be a half-assed "celebrity", and actively pursue public attention) who gets fanboyed/trolled by thirsty morons isn't "being gangstalked". "Gangstalking" would require an single, secret, organized group with a specific, strategic agenda (beyond a dozen morons independently thinking "Imma go down in Christory lol xd!!!").

Behaving in a way that repeatedly inspires people, often completely independent of eachother, to mock you and fuck with you, does not mean you're being "gangstalked"- it means you're acting in a way that attracts too much attention. If, for some reason, you're unable to stop the behaviour that's drawing attention, then the issue isn't the "gangstalkers"/those paying attention (even if they're extremely shitty, deeply autistic people); the issue that needs addressing is your inability to act like a normal person- til that issue is solved, this "gangstalking" won't stop.

Anyway, even if you really do believe Chris is being "gangstalked", what could anyone possibly even do about it? I mean, I guess I could think of some obvious targets who are probably the worst culprits, but the level of commitment and autism shown by these speds is a truly terrifying, unstoppable force of nature.

 

[ChuckSlaughter]

Who is 'we'? If you're trolling Chris, stop. Otherwise trying to get involved here is like bashing your head against a wall, as evidenced by the fact that even with people here trying to look after him he still constantly compromises himself online. Laughing at these stupid autists is good, them having a thread is good,

If this wasn't chris's livelihood having the attention of the internet would clearly be a bad thing for him. I'lll agree with the stop trolling chris bit.

 

[Marvin]

OMFG "Gangstalking" is not a thing.

People here are mis-using the term; no sane person could believe that real "gangstalking" is a thing.

Real "Gangstalking" is a delusion, comparable to belief in crack bugs or Capgras syndrome, used by the (literally, clinically) mentally ill, to explain how they totally aren't mentally ill. Chris's trolls aren't "gangstalkers", because Chris's trolls actually exist.

Being a half-assed "internet celebrity" (because you really really want to be a half-assed "celebrity", and actively pursue public attention) who gets fanboyed/trolled by thirsty morons isn't "being gangstalked". "Gangstalking" would require an single, secret, organized group with a specific, strategic agenda (beyond a dozen morons independently thinking "Imma go down in Christory lol xd!!!").

Behaving in a way that repeatedly inspires people, often completely independent of eachother, to mock you and fuck with you, does not mean you're being "gangstalked"- it means you're acting in a way that attracts too much attention. If, for some reason, you're unable to stop the behaviour that's drawing attention, then the issue isn't the "gangstalkers"/those paying attention (even if they're extremely shitty, deeply autistic people); the issue that needs addressing is your inability to act like a normal person- til that issue is solved, this "gangstalking" won't stop.

Perhaps gangstalking isn't 100% the most accurate term. Gangstalking is generally regarded as a conspiracy theory.

Still, it's a pretty dumb to regard the harassment Chris receives as "completely independent of each other".

It'd be more accurate to say there's not that much overt coordination, but there sure as shit plenty of implicit coordination in the form of the cwcki and boards like this.

For example, there's plenty of "relics of Christory" that some speds would shit themselves if they managed to recover them. (The autism papers, anyone?) And sure, there's no central, explicit conversation where the group tells some member to go fetch them. But still, at the end of the day, all of us have that same idea in our head. None of us would be surprised that someone felt the need to fetch that particular relic. Or really any relic about Chris

That some guy thought Chris' high school schoolwork would be of interest to the group was not surprising to anyone. People here picked over it like vultures and carrion.

Anyway, even if you really do believe Chris is being "gangstalked", what could anyone possibly even do about it? I mean, I guess I could think of some obvious targets who are probably the worst culprits, but the level of commitment and autism shown by these speds is a truly terrifying, unstoppable force of nature.

I don't think there's anything that can be done about it.

I just think people need to stop trying to blame the victim, Chris, for this. I think we all need to accept Chris is mentally ill, he's been manipulated by many, many strangers, he's had his privacy repeatedly violated in disturbing ways.

People need to stop pretending "lol he consented to it" as if that's an excuse.

To me, it's on par with "hey twelve year old girl, stop getting groomed by perverts on the internet". Because Chris is more or less that retarded.

 

[Gym Leader Elesa]

Perhaps gangstalking isn't 100% the most accurate term. Gangstalking is generally regarded as a conspiracy theory.

Still, it's a pretty dumb to regard the harassment Chris receives as "completely independent of each other".

It'd be more accurate to say there's not that much overt coordination, but there sure as shit plenty of implicit coordination in the form of the cwcki and boards like this.

For example, there's plenty of "relics of Christory" that some speds would shit themselves if they managed to recover them. (The autism papers, anyone?) And sure, there's no central, explicit conversation where the group tells some member to go fetch them. But still, at the end of the day, all of us have that same idea in our head. None of us would be surprised that someone felt the need to fetch that particular relic. Or really any relic about Chris

That some guy thought Chris' high school schoolwork would be of interest to the group was not surprising to anyone. People here picked over it like vultures and carrion.

I don't think there's anything that can be done about it.

I just think people need to stop trying to blame the victim, Chris, for this. I think we all need to accept Chris is mentally ill, he's been manipulated by many, many strangers, he's had his privacy repeatedly violated in disturbing ways.

People need to stop pretending "lol he consented to it" as if that's an excuse.

To me, it's on par with "hey twelve year old girl, stop getting groomed by perverts on the internet". Because Chris is more or less that exceptional.

You will never win this fight because a huge amount of people on this site literally have to believe they're not laughing at a retarded man or their self-image collapses.

That said you are, of course, right.

 

[Depression_Begins]

Do you know the extent to which trolls will go through to get to Chris? Chris is not guaranteed to be safe and secure in a group home. I wouldn't even be surprised if a troll got a job as an employee at his group home so they could mess with him.

Chris' relationship with the internet is really bitter sweet. Chris could just leave the internet forever and rid himself of all the abuse. But he endures it for the attention and money it's been able to give him.

You will never win this fight because a huge amount of people on this site literally have to believe they're not laughing at a exceptional man or their self-image collapses.

That said you are, of course, right.

Honestly, I don't find Chris that funny, more-so fascinating.