Chris-Chan Arrested and in Jail, awaiting Hearing on Monday (28-Dec-2014)

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TheClassic said:
Remember their last plea bargain? Where they pled guilty but still wanted to tell "their side" of what really happened,,,,,,
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That happens from time to time, Chris can get a good deal here Common Assualt Plus Mischeif maybe around 30-90 day in the county Jail compared to a minimum of a year if he fights it ..... Hopfully he will just plead
 
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SnakeKid and his grandpa strike again.

Or whoever Chris is blaming for all his problems these days.

I cannot wait to see Chris' spin on this. It's going to be some gold-medal-Olympian-level mental gymnastics for sure.
Chris is always fishing for sympathy with his 'my mother needs me to provide for and support her', but he's managed to surprise me with how little of a shit he actually gives. I thought Barb was the one person he felt genuine... affection...? something... for, yet "correcting" Sonic's arms are clearly more important.

Although that being said, he certainly thought he would get away with zero repercussions, strutting out like the sassy tomgirl he thinks he is. Which is what makes this so much more satisfying.
 
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I know that Chris won't get the book thrown at him and his prognosis of Autism will be a factor in the sentencing...

... So is it wrong I'm expecting him tomorrow to start screaming lines from Transformers The Movie at the judge?

Judge: "Due process in this case says..."

Chris: "SPARE ME THIS MOCKERY OF JUSTICE...!"
 
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I dunno, any plea bargaining here is probably going to be pity for an autistic? I mean, it's hard to believe he would deny any of this.
 
anephric said:
I know that Chris won't get the book thrown at him and his prognosis of Autism will be a factor in the sentencing...
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So far, every Optimist's prediction has been pimp-slapped away to surrender to cold hard Reality.

Chris has a record of prior arrests. He was given the lenient treatment before, but all Chris got from that is "I can do anything I want and get away with it". The next judge is going to read through all of that and realize that some Tough Love may be in order now. Strike Three for ManBaby.

The Joker said:
I feel sorry for the jail workers who have to deal with Chris's screeching. He has to be in protective custody or the psychiatric unit. He would be eaten alive in general population.
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For all we know, Chris may be strapped into a restraint chair for the night. The cops seem very weary of Chris if that call was any indication, and they may not be in the mood for his shit this time around.
 
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This is, in a way, sad. Chris clearly learned absolutely nothing from the incidents with Snyder, or the first time he vandalized a store display and got banned from Gamestop (remember "HexBox?"), nor did he learn from the litany of other potential things that could have taught him a positive life-lesson, and now, we get to watch as the character arc of our favorite lolcow comes to its tragic conclusion.

It begs the question: What have we all learned from this? We've learned that Chris picked up the feeling that the system does not apply to him, and that he should be allowed to do whatever he want, even if it involves Vandalism and such, and with his record, one wonders if the court system will finally throw the proverbial book at him. The Autism defense isn't going to work for multiple offenses. The way I see it, he's incarcerated, institutionalized, or made a ward of the state, since Barb clearly cannot take care of him. APS is likely to get involved, since.... Well, fucking look at Chris.

As we watch this lolcow ride off into the sunset like a forklift driven by a dead man, we should all bear in mind what that entails.

And laugh at it.
 
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Gene Parmesan said:
Just a quick bit of internet lawyering. Much the same way that jail and prison are not synonyms, but two distinct items. Bail and bond are two distinct items.

Bail is where you give cash as assurance that you will return for trial. You get that back at the end, guilty or not, so long as you show.
Bond is where you DON'T have cash and instead contact a bondsman who, for 10% of the bail that they keep (they get the whole bail back) ensure you show up. That's what Dog The Bounty Hunter did, other than meth and racism.

Even if Chris and Barb can't post bail, they can probably get a bail bondsman to spring him.
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Oh God. OH GOD.
Three words:

Bounty Hunter Saga.
 
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So has Skyraider gotten locked up on purpose yet to bring us an update?

On the bright side, we know that he has at least one friend to talk to on the inside.

00311.jpg
 
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I Want Cake said:
I know some people are born optimists, but I wish people would stop assuming the best circumstances for Chris. It's like they are living in denial.

Optimist: "Maybe all Chris sprayed on the guy was some perfume."
Reality: No. it was mace or pepper spray

Optimist: "Maybe the pepper spray was weak and not effective"
Reality: It doesn't matter if Chris squirted cold water at him. It's still assault

Optimist: "Chris won't get arrested".
Reality: Chris got arrested.

Optimist: "Chris only got banned from a few local Gamestops"
Reality: The ban is for ALL of the Gamestops, everywhere. Chris could attempt to sneak into one in Santa Monica, but with his e-infamy, there's still a risk he could get caught.

Optimist: "All Chris will get is a stern look from the Police and a warning to stay away"
Reality: Chris is stuck in jail for at least 48 hours. Alone.

Optimist: "Gamestop probably won't press charges"
Reality: Gamestop may have no choice but to press charges. If they didn't, that store could be labeled as a "hostile work environment" by who knows what state and labor agencies. Gamestop isn't going to risk getting on OSHA's Shitlist to protect some arrogant trantard who had no business being there in the first place.
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You forgot:

Optimist: "The state will see Chris needs therapy and put him in a group home/appoint a legal guardian/give him the treatment he needs!".
Reality: Chris is a criminal and nothing more in the eyes of the law. It doesn't matter if he dresses like a bag lady or spergs about blue arms, he's a criminal.
 
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TheRedRanger said:
I pity whoever gets roped into defending him. Rob Bell sure as fuck isn't going to take his case pro bono again.
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Rob Bell didn't take their case pro bono in the first place. Barb paid for his services using Bob's estate, like $50-$100k or something, and only when she was running out of money did she cave and accept the deal the prosecutor was giving them.

Barb's ego cost her and Chris tens of thousands of dollars.
 
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Marvin said:
Rob Bell didn't take their case pro bono in the first place. Barb paid for his services using Bob's estate, like $50-$100k or something, and only when she was running out of money did she cave and accept the deal the prosecutor was giving them.
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good god I can see Chris wasting a whole lot of a hard working(and underpayed and funded) public defender's time,
 
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Marvin said:
Rob Bell didn't take their case pro bono in the first place. Barb paid for his services using Bob's estate, like $50-$100k or something, and only when she was running out of money did she cave and accept the deal the prosecutor was giving them.

Barb's ego cost her and Chris tens of thousands of dollars.
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It really goes to show the extent of her delusion. It's not that she's being obstinate just because she thinks she can get away with it, she is genuinely willing to put her money where her mouth is and blow several years worth of living expenses for the sake of trying to prove her innocence in a crime she was party to.
 
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