DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[whereicantfollow]

LMAO. I've never seen Phils "gated community" but this takes the cake. It just looks like one of those automatic gates that opens up when you drive up to it and wait for a bit. I used to work a job that brought me to a place that had a legit security checkpoint with a guard posted there almost every day. Makes me laugh because it was a pain to get in if the guard was on break and Phils "gated community" is basically just a fence.

 

[DukeMorty]

Someone asked DSP if he'd rather play Crash Team Racing with the Guitar Hero controller or fight Mike Tyson. Dark replied that if he fought Tyson he'd probably be faster than him because Tyson is old. Yeah...

The 37 year old who doesn't exercise and has the body of a school lunch lady thinks he has speed advantage over Tyson.

LMAO Oh I would love to see that fat shit pigroach box against Tyson. Tyson is in better shape than Phil and he is older. Hell there is a youtube video of Tyson showing some boxing moves. Watch this video to see how speedy phil can outspeed Tyson lol

 

[thedingledongle]

-Blue apron and similar services = too expensive

Fun fact. My wife and I do Blue Apron / Hello Fresh as a way to learn new dishes, and if you subscribe for enough weeks, they give you codes to hand out to friends, which are worth a free week (3 meals, two servings a piece). I offered Phil a free week during a stream, and he seemed somewhat enthusiastic about it. Proceeded to email him one of my codes and never heard anything back again.

 

[ZehnBoat]

LMAO Oh I would love to see that fat shit pigroach box against Tyson. Tyson is in better shape than Phil and he is older. Hell there is a youtube video of Tyson showing some boxing moves. Watch this video to see how speedy phil can outspeed Tyson lol

i like how phil thinks speed is the end all be all
phil it doesn't matter if you hit mike first, when your punches hurt like wet tissue, it means shit

 

[Fascist Frederick]

Someone asked DSP if he'd rather play Crash Team Racing with the Guitar Hero controller or fight Mike Tyson. Dark replied that if he fought Tyson he'd probably be faster than him because Tyson is old. Yeah...

The 37 year old who doesn't exercise and has the body of a school lunch lady thinks he has speed advantage over Tyson.

A lot of people think that muscles and training are what really matter in a fight, but that's not how it works in the real world. What you don't realize, is that I have over NINETY EIGHT PERCENT BODY FAT okay? Body fat acts like a cushion. Sure Mike Tyson can hit hard but only 2 percent of that is going to get through. That's nothing! ACK ACK ACK!

 

[SowonNation]

Can we please make a compilation out of all the clips where he's bragging about being "married"?
I can't stand this loser tonight. Too much clown-mode and condescending shit going on because it's his PREMIERE STREAM of a game he had to beg for.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

Someone baited him into talking about his burned face.

It was an "airbag burn." The heat and the force of the airbag burned the entire side of his face, turning it all "like black and then all like bloody and nasty for 2 or 3 weeks". LUCKILY he didn't get any scars from it. Surprised by the fact that he scarred easily from chicken pox but this left him unscathed, but again as he said, "the whole side of my face was burned" and he guesses he lucked out.

A very real story.

what a load of horse shit. thats not how burns work. skin is decently resistant to flammability, but as a high enough temperature or prolonged exposure (or assisted with an outside fuel source) it will burn. fires require fuel, they dont just burn for nothing. so if your skin is on fire, your skin is the fucking fuel. thats why you see burns that look disfigured, melted, or "slick", tissue burned away like a candle. at best, what dsp got was a fucking heat rash and a bruise. but tough guy phil needs to seem like a terminator level badass, so he "caught fire" and miraculously survived untouched and unscarred. dood, its a true story, my uncle that works at nintendo confirmed it

A lot of people think that muscles and training are what really matter in a fight, but that's not how it works in the real world. What you don't realize, is that I have over NINETY EIGHT PERCENT BODY FAT okay? Body fat acts like a cushion. Sure Mike Tyson can hit hard but only 2 percent of that is going to get through. That's nothing! ACK ACK ACK!

having muscles and strength helps in fights, but if youre just throwing fists hoping they'll land, youre gonna lose. that said, if mike tyson punched a fat person, it would still cause a shit ton of fucking damage, that man knows how to put his weight behind a fist and cause damage. may not crack any bones, but the internals will definitely be screaming for mercy

 

[whereicantfollow]

Can we please make a compilation out of all the clips where he's bragging about being "married"?
I can't stand this loser tonight. Too much clown-mode and condescending shit going on because it's his PREMIERE STREAM of a game he had to beg for.
View attachment 840377

Imagine acting like being married at 37 is an accomplishment. Phil had to tie the knot with the soulmaid so she wouldn't run away like Leanna did.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

Imagine acting like being married at 37 is an accomplishment. Phil had to tie the knot with the soulmaid so she wouldn't run away like Leanna did.

oh, im sure it'll be an accomplishment he'll love to bring up and rub in peoples faces when in 2 years, she divorced his ass and took half of his statues, stuffed animal mascots, and gin

 

[Fascist Frederick]

having muscles and strength helps in fights, but if youre just throwing fists hoping they'll land, youre gonna lose. that said, if mike tyson punched a fat person, it would still cause a shit ton of fucking damage, that man knows how to put his weight behind a fist and cause damage. may not crack any bones, but the internals will definitely be screaming for mercy

I was making a joke about Phil being stupid and fat.

 

[SowonNation]

oh, im sure it'll be an accomplishment he'll love to bring up and rub in peoples faces when in 2 years, she divorced his ass and took half of his statues, stuffed animal mascots, and gin

"NO, NOT THE GIN HONEY"

also; I love how he went from "The behind the scenes-problem is keeping me up until 5am man. I couldn't sleep, and my first stream is cancelled guys. I'm sorry guys but I don't know how to beat it myself"
to
"Would I be able to beat Mike Tyson in a fight? Fuck yeah, I'm faster than him, I think I can get a few punches in and beat him, especially since he's pretty old now."

He must be on Wings' mood stabilizers.

 

[DiabeticSP]

Mike would probably actually for real literally kill Dave with a punch.


You don't forget boxing. Mike's still jacked as shit for an old man.

Still got it!! Mike Tyson Showing Skills to his new movie cast - Mike Tyson Highlights

mike tyson even at 50 still has it showing skills and boxing techniques to his cast for his upcoming movie video credit to @kevinlee81 https://instagram.com/...

youtu.be

 

[bearsintrees]

Phil backed down from a fight with literal reanimated skeleton Viscant.

Tyson would make him a wet powder.

Edited side note: it's fucking amazing that he made the debut of a game that he claimed he couldn't afford and got 2 days of drama around it, that he was so excited to play, that's easily FIFTY HOURS LONG, a late night stream that got around 260 viewers ensuring that he'll probably never finish it.

 

[N0thingICanDo]

 

[actually]

Got a new mini-whale. Cosmicclownface has cheered ~$20 tonight, gifted 10 subs, and appears to have bought Phil the Sega Genesis mini.

 

[Forbidden Math]

Got a new mini-whale. Cosmicclownface has cheered ~$20 tonight, gifted 10 subs, and appears to have bought Phil the Sega Genesis mini.

inb4 Comicclownface is insulted and banned before the Genesis mini comes out.

 

[ZehnBoat]

so phil was bitching about how it's unfair that he can't get sponsored streams (afaik, according to twitter folks)

i thought he was RAW and REAL

i kind of wish phil could do more sponsored streams
i would love to see him force himself to whore himself out

 

[actually]

inb4 Comicclownface is insulted and banned before the Genesis mini comes out.

Nah, Cosmic is a good little whale bitch. Was paying 100 bits per statement, more or less, including to tell Phil that he had bought the Genesis mini.

 

[PieceofShet]

Nah, Cosmic is a good little whale bitch. Was paying 100 bits per statement, more or less, including to tell Phil that he had bought the Genesis mini.

Hopefully it wont turn out that he is a wheelchair symbol too...

 

[actually]

I've never preordered anything from Amazon...could cosmic cancel the gifted pre-order? The thing doesn't release until fucking September.