Plagued Incels.is (Previously known as /r/incels) - Subreddit's banned, entitled Manchildren whine about why they can't get laid.

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

People who endorse incel talking points have been responsible for almost every mass shooting in this country for the past five years, and the actual self-identified incel community regularly cheers on these events. It's not hard to see why the media has glommed onto that narrative. As far as I'm concerned, incels are indistinguishable from Islamists. Both are identities formed around oppressing women and glorifying edgelord suicide rampages as the ultimate moral ascension.

This is such a load of shit. You're putting all "incels/volcels" into the same category as if they all have the same beliefs or same perspective on life. We're not all the same
Some of us are just fat fucks who never got laid, we went to church, we had friends, we went towards our own career goals and passions. Than when you're in your late 20s you realize you've never been laid and things changed. I changed my whole life around and lost weight.

Not all incels are violent or hateful towards women either. I do think both sides have correct viewpoints though, incels aren't entirely wrong either

Guess what, we didn't want to be this way but society forced us into this way of life because of bullying and excluding kids from social environments. Guess why?

 

[ProgKing of the North]

This is such a load of shit. You're putting all "incels/volcels" into the same category as if they all have the same beliefs or same perspective on life. We're not all the same
Some of us are just fat fucks who never got laid, we went to church, we had friends, we went towards our own career goals and passions. Than when you're in your late 20s you realize you've never been laid and things changed. I changed my whole life around and lost weight.

Not all incels are violent or hateful towards women either. I do think both sides have correct viewpoints though, incels aren't entirely wrong either

Guess what, we didn't want to be this way but society forced us into this way of life because of bullying and excluding kids from social environments. Guess why?

You don't have to identify as an incel just because you're a virgin in your late 20s, bro. It may have started as just that, but these days if you self-identify as an incel people will think you endorse all their hateful bullshit.

Why do people even need to know you're a virgin? Bullying in school's a bitch, I get it, but if you're 30 years old and people are still bullying you for being "ugly" or "fat" just find different people to be around.

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

You don't have to identify as an incel just because you're a virgin in your late 20s, bro. It may have started as just that, but these days if you self-identify as an incel people will think you endorse all their hateful bullshit.

Why do people even need to know you're a virgin? Bullying in school's a bitch, I get it, but if you're 30 years old and people are still bullying you for being "ugly" or "fat" just find different people to be around.

You don't get it. Bullying continues into adult hood in the corporate world. People will bully others all the time if they can get something over you

Here's another thing, I don't tell anyone I'm an incel or a virgin. I keep that to myself. Does it matter, apparently it actually does. Try being in the top of your field and losing everything because of something like you've never had sex

 

[ProgKing of the North]

You don't get it. Bullying continues into adult hood in the corporate world. People will bully others all the time if they can get something over you

Here's another thing, I don't tell anyone I'm an incel or a virgin. I keep that to myself. Does it matter, apparently it actually does. Try being in the top of your field and losing everything because of something like you've never had sex

Dude, there's people who probably wake up fucking praying that they get fired for being a virgin so they can take that company to the fucking cleaners and be set for life financially

Unless you were trying to be a porn star or a male prostitute I have no idea how your sex life or lack therof is at all relevant to your work

 

[JaneThough]

This is such a load of shit. You're putting all "incels/volcels" into the same category as if they all have the same beliefs or same perspective on life. We're not all the same
Some of us are just fat fucks who never got laid, we went to church, we had friends, we went towards our own career goals and passions. Than when you're in your late 20s you realize you've never been laid and things changed. I changed my whole life around and lost weight.

Not all incels are violent or hateful towards women either. I do think both sides have correct viewpoints though, incels aren't entirely wrong either

Guess what, we didn't want to be this way but society forced us into this way of life because of bullying and excluding kids from social environments. Guess why?

It's so unfair to generalize about incels, because they never generalize about anyone! Incels have never said all women are a certain way!

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

Dude, there's people who probably wake up fucking praying that they get fired for being a virgin so they can take that company to the fucking cleaners and be set for life financially

Unless you were trying to be a porn star or a male prostitute I have no idea how your sex life or lack therof is at all relevant to your work

Yea well. You don't know my story
My boss was making fun of me because of this in front of other coworkers and I lost my mind eventually. How did my boss know? I was a very fat guy and people would have known this fat fuck never got laid, I focused my life on my career. Ended up losing weight and my boss started making fun of me

Do I have any proof? No, not anymore. Should have had a recorder or video proof for months. Can't prove anything
Corporate bullying happens

It's so unfair to generalize about incels, because they never generalize about anyone! Incels have never said all women are a certain way!

I'm not disagreeing with this. The idea behind an incel is a guy who never got laid for one reason or another. (Usually society or social reasons)
Well I'm one of them. But I don't subscribe to their ideology at all. I probably don't have the same views as you either but don't generalize all "incels" into some stereotype

Not all of us hate women just because we are different

How about this , Jane if that's your name

Would it bother you if a guy had a career/money/wealth/status but he's an incel? Would something like that bother you?
On top of all that, lets throw in workaholic. Why is it such an issue if a man never had sex?

 

[Viridian]

Why is it such an issue if a man never had sex?

It's not an issue. I can't speak for my entire gender obviously, but no woman I know would see it as an issue. Immature teenagers maybe, but adult women? We might be surprised to find out someone is a virgin (depending on their looks, age, behavior, etc.), but that's it. There's nothing wrong with being a virgin, just as there's nothing wrong with not being a virgin.

Incels are the ones who make it an issue. They're the ones spinning this rabid hateful conspiracy theory that their virginity is some kind of punishment cruelly inflicted upon them, that they are being deliberately oppressed by a vast worldwide conspiracy of literally every woman on the planet as well as the 20% of the male population they qualify as "Chads". If those asshats didn't feel the need to constantly screech about how they can't get laid and how they feel entitled to use violence to acquire sex, we'd never know about it or care.

 

[A Logging Company]

How about this , Jane if that's your name

Would it bother you if a guy had a career/money/wealth/status but he's an incel? Would something like that bother you?
On top of all that, lets throw in workaholic. Why is it such an issue if a man never had sex?

The problem is men-who-don't-have-sex have formed an identity around the fact they don't have sex, most believing it is hopeless and reinforcing the despair, causing the usual decline into extremeism for in-group status. Its like how Straight Edge (punk rock movement to not drink and do drugs) got to the point people wouldn't take any sort of medicine or have sex, an X-Cel if you will.

While the term "Incel" is descriptive, it has become an active identity, so unless you are active on incel forums and sites, you should not label yourself or think of yourself as an Incel. I'm going to add a lot of the anti-incel people in this thread are also very exceptional in their own right.

 

[JaneThough]

Why is it such an issue if a man never had sex?

It's not to anyone except incels. No one cares about your sex life.

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

It's not an issue. I can't speak for my entire gender obviously, but no woman I know would see it as an issue. Immature teenagers maybe, but adult women? We might be surprised to find out someone is a virgin (depending on their looks, age, behavior, etc.), but that's it. There's nothing wrong with being a virgin, just as there's nothing wrong with not being a virgin.

Incels are the ones who make it an issue. They're the ones spinning this rabid hateful conspiracy theory that their virginity is some kind of punishment cruelly inflicted upon them, that they are being deliberately oppressed by a vast worldwide conspiracy of literally every woman on the planet as well as the 20% of the male population they qualify as "Chads". If those asshats didn't feel the need to constantly screech about how they can't get laid and how they feel entitled to use violence to acquire sex, we'd never know about it or care.

I genuinely hope that's true but so far I only talk to women and maybe I'm to friendly. I always get frienzoned
Do I just ask women for sex or what I dont know.

The problem is men-who-don't-have-sex have formed an identity around the fact they don't have sex, most believing it is hopeless and reinforcing the despair, causing the usual decline into extremeism for in-group status. Its like how Straight Edge (punk rock movement to not drink and do drugs) got to the point people wouldn't take any sort of medicine or have sex, an X-Cel if you will.

While the term "Incel" is descriptive, it has become an active identity, so unless you are active on incel forums and sites, you should not label yourself or think of yourself as an Incel. I'm going to add a lot of the anti-incel people in this thread are also very exceptional in their own right.

True. I never worried or cared much about not getting laid until my late 20s. I felt like I was so behind everyone else and it broke me down mentally. I wanted to get a good job and provide for a wife/kids in the future rather than have sex with anyone who would offer it up

Guess I'm an incel now lumped into the same steryotype of those losers. Do I regret my career, yes
I wish i pursued women/sex like every other normal person in society

I'm a failure

It's not to anyone except incels. No one cares about your sex life.

I made friends with a girl and she said she likes me but we would never have sex together. She said me being a virgin means I'm a loser and she does not want to have sex with me but only friends

I like her friendship but I would be lying if I didn't need sex at this point. Here's the problem, when I talk to other women IRL she gets jealous and bitter with me

why would she be angry? we're only friends

 

[KimCoppolaAficionado]

I made friends with a girl and she said she likes me but we would never have sex together. She said me being a virgin means I'm a loser and she does not want to have sex with me but only friends

I like her friendship but I would be lying if I didn't need sex at this point. Here's the problem, when I talk to other women IRL she gets jealous and bitter with me

why would she be angry? we're only friends

Because she's a vindictive, controlling cunt.
It sounds like a lot of your issue is that you have very low self-esteem, which in turn causes toxic people looking for an easy target for abuse to be drawn to you, which causes you to develop a low opinion of people in general, which in turn further lowers your self-esteem, because if these rancid fucks are still successful, what does that say about you? It's a common problem.
My advice would be to spend time with people who are interested in the same things you're interested in, instead of just chasing after someone because you feel your biological clock ticking or because you think society will view you as a freak if you aren't in a relationship.

 

[JaneThough]

I made friends with a girl and she said she likes me but we would never have sex together. She said me being a virgin means I'm a loser and she does not want to have sex with me but only friends

I like her friendship but I would be lying if I didn't need sex at this point. Here's the problem, when I talk to other women IRL she gets jealous and bitter with me

why would she be angry? we're only friends

That girl is not your friend. I don't have much context here, as I only have your side of it, but a friend doesn't tell you you're a loser for being a virgin. So either you're not relaying the situation as it is, or she's a bad person and you shouldn't consider her a friend.

Also, though, this thread and this site isn't here to be your therapist.

 

[JoeyJoJo]

It's nice lonely undesirable men have a community but these communities do way more harm than good. Instead of obsessing about sex, chads, stacies , genetics and dating they could put that into better use (a practical skill, a hobby like gaming or maybe mens rights activism) . Being alone and going without touch and sex is pretty shitty and can have very negative effects but this is not the way to fix it. The whole situation is Miserable just Miserable

 

[JaneThough]

It's nice lonely undesirable men have a community but these communities do way more harm than good. Instead of obsessing about sex, chads, stacies , genetics and dating they could put that into better use (a practical skill, a hobby like gaming or maybe mens rights activism) . Being alone and going without touch and sex is pretty shitty and can have very negative effects but this is not the way to fix it. The whole situation is Miserable just Miserable

That was actually the point of the original incel community (which I like to remind was started by a woman). It was supposed to be a place for people to come together and commiserate with each other but also try to problem solve and find their way out of inceldom. But then the NEETs took over and made inceldom into a permanent situation, rather than a temporary bump in the road.

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

Because she's a vindictive, controlling cunt.
It sounds like a lot of your issue is that you have very low self-esteem, which in turn causes toxic people looking for an easy target for abuse to be drawn to you.

No, I used to have low self esteem. Not anymore tbh.
I have noticed something about other people in society/at work and other situations. When I'm confident and feeling happy other people seek to put me down so I will not be so confident. That's one of the reasons I mistrust most people, when I'm actually happy/confident guess what others do, they seek to destroy your happiness,.

you think I should drop her? This has been going on for months and we talk a lot but recently its kind of dying down. She did get in a fit of rage a few times when she found out I was talking to other women

She wont even give me sex. wTF

That girl is not your friend. I don't have much context here, as I only have your side of it, but a friend doesn't tell you you're a loser for being a virgin. So either you're not relaying the situation as it is, or she's a bad person and you shouldn't consider her a friend.

Also, though, this thread and this site isn't here to be your therapist.

Shes the only person/friend I made in this state in 2019. (Long story) but yes i told her i like her, she said the same thing first and a couple of times but I dont really have anyone else so I'm trying to keep this going but lately she is getting colder with me after months of talking daily

She played me?

 

[JaneThough]

No, I used to have low self esteem. Not anymore tbh.
I have noticed something about other people in society/at work and other situations. When I'm confident and feeling happy other people seek to put me down so I will not be so confident. That's one of the reasons I mistrust most people, when I'm actually happy/confident guess what others do, they seek to destroy your happiness,.

you think I should drop her? This has been going on for months and we talk a lot but recently its kind of dying down. She did get in a fit of rage a few times when she found out I was talking to other women

She wont even give me sex. wTF

I think you need to stop airing your grievances in a thread on Kiwi Farms of all fucking places.

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

It's nice lonely undesirable men have a community but these communities do way more harm than good. Instead of obsessing about sex, chads, stacies , genetics and dating they could put that into better use (a practical skill, a hobby like gaming or maybe mens rights activism) . Being alone and going without touch and sex is pretty shitty and can have very negative effects but this is not the way to fix it. The whole situation is Miserable just Miserable

So we are nice and kind people. We have jobs/career goals but someho0w we are undesirable men?
Let me post a private pic somewhere and you'll see. I don't see myself as undesirable at all

I think you need to stop airing your grievances in a thread on Kiwi Farms of all fucking places.

Hey, well its my first day here so what is this place about? I noticed the thread so I'm posting my thoughts

 

[Jet Girl]

Hey, well its my first day here so what is this place about? I noticed the thread so I'm posting my thoughts

God damn dude, lurk more and get a therapist.

 

[Pomniman]

It's nice lonely undesirable men have a community but these communities do way more harm than good. Instead of obsessing about sex, chads, stacies , genetics and dating they could put that into better use (a practical skill, a hobby like gaming or maybe mens rights activism) . Being alone and going without touch and sex is pretty shitty and can have very negative effects but this is not the way to fix it. The whole situation is Miserable just Miserable

That was never going to be possible when these communities decided to define themselves by how lonely and undesirable their members felt in the first place. Men who are primarily concerned with developing skills or delving into hobbies don't feel the need to fixate on their sex lives enough to join "incel" communities. I have absolutely no pity for anyone who self-identifies as an "incel" because taking up that mantle is announcing that you're a kicked dog to the world and begging to be kicked even harder.

 

[RockBottomNeverFeltBetter]

God damn dude, lurk more and get a therapist.

What makes you say that out of curioristy? What have you noticed so far about me that I need one?

anyone who self-identifies as an "incel" because taking up that mantle is announcing that you're a kicked dog to the world and begging to be kicked even harder.

Good point.