DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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JamFlowMan said:
Jesus Christ that is terrifying. How are his legs worse then his arms? Neither get any kind of actual workout, but he at least stands and walks in-between places to sit and yet there is no muscle to be seen. Not the kind of guy to knock people for the kind of shape they're in but this would be genuinely concerning if it weren't Phil.
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I hate to say it, but DSP's body has already atrophied at 37. I can't imagine what it will look like by 65.
 
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bearsintrees said:
When he says he walks on his tiptoes to exercise I imagine it's a lot of this where he's basically hobbling around like a dainty Cotton Hill and practically goes off balance from walking three steps. His center of gravity is like a foot in front of his knees.
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Never seen this before. Good fucking lord, Phil moves around like a crippled old man who spent 40 years of his life doing physical labor; it looks painful and I'd honestly feel bad if he wasn't such a piece of shit. Phil will probably be in a wheelchair before he reaches the age of 50, assuming he lives that long. Hey, at least he'd be like most of his fans and he'd actually have something to use for his begging ("I CAN'T AFFORD NEW COLOSTOMY BAGS!"). There's also his flabby, noodle arms that he can't even lift a bag of groceries with and has to use a special cart (that he paid hundreds of dollars for) or gets his special horse to do it for him. But yeah, I'm sure he can totally outmaneuver and go a round with "old" Mike Tyson, might even get a few kicks in. Sound good?
 
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Kermit the Frog said:
Never seen this before. Good fucking lord, Phil moves around like a crippled old man who spent 40 years of his life doing physical labor; it looks painful and I'd honestly feel bad if he wasn't such a piece of shit. Phil will probably be in a wheelchair before he reaches the age of 50, assuming he lives that long. Hey, at least he'd be like most of his fans and he'd actually have something to use for his begging ("I CAN'T AFFORD NEW COLOSTOMY BAGS!"). There's also his flabby, noodle arms that he can't even lift a bag of groceries with and has to use a special cart (that he paid hundreds of dollars for) or gets his special horse to do it for him. But yeah, I'm sure he can totally outmaneuver and go a round with "old" Mike Tyson, might even get a few kicks in. Sound good?
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I've actually been slowly attempting to compile images like these for a thread concerning Dave's musculature and physical fitness (hopefully it's different enough from the Dr. Phil thread), and yes, it's that bad. His body is a nightmare. I've never seen someone relatively able-bodied be in such bad shape at the age of 37. And if he wasn't completely lying about his back injury and assuming it was a herniated disc or discs, he's definitely got some degenerative disc disease happening as a result of his lifestyle (99.9% sedentary) and diet.
 
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draculapenis said:
I've actually been slowly attempting to compile images like these for a thread concerning Dave's musculature and physical fitness (hopefully it's different enough from the Dr. Phil thread), and yes, it's that bad. His body is a nightmare. I've never seen someone relatively able-bodied be in such bad shape at the age of 37. And if he wasn't completely lying about his back injury and assuming it was a herniated disc or discs, he's definitely got some degenerative disc disease happening as a result of his lifestyle (99.9% sedentary) and diet.
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It's pretty amazing to see how he's gone from a regular chubby mid-20s nerd when he's claimed he was such a bodybuilder it almost could have killed him, to an enormous saggy head and solid block of tits and liver, with his pipe-cleaner muppet arms and legs of today. Sounds like a fun thread.
 
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Nigel of Ukip said:
Let me drop this real quick, seems to fit.

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I don't think Mike Tyson would kill DSP. Unless they did a whole months long press tour a la McGregor Mayweather and DSP pissed Tyson off well and good beforehand. It'd be over quick, pretty sure even a grazing blow from Tyson would bowl Phil over and he'd contort his knee in and around and wouldn't be able to get back up.
 
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TheKatIsNowGone said:
The text to speech and talking over DSP when he is saying something exceptional I want to hear is why I stopped watching Tevin. I honestly don't think Tevin really cares about DSP much anymore, they're like an old married couple who really don't pay attention to each other anymore but keep the relationship going out of convenience and lack of creativity.
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This. Fucking this. A thousand fucking times, THIS.

That text to speech shit, the holyfuckkillyourself audio clips that play before the TTS message, occaisonal long message that necessitates stopping the DSP stream, all of it makes me want to have a fucking gamer moment. I genuinely do not know how people actually watch a single Tevin video. I would rather just watch DSP raw, which for reference, I would still decline to watch compared to a grotesque animal abuse video. (Protip; I wouldn't like that.)

Tevin and DSP are truly a married couple, both equally annoying autism magnets. I'm not even saying that to be facetious, DSP probably thinks about Tevin more than Khat. He probably gave Tevin a bigger birthday shoutout than he did to Khat last year. They both live in each other's heads and they bicker from time to time.

Edit: Update for all parties concerned: no I did not subject myself to more than 2-3 Tevin videos. It's not a guilty pleasure like watching pigroach.
 
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draculapenis said:
I've actually been slowly attempting to compile images like these for a thread concerning Dave's musculature and physical fitness (hopefully it's different enough from the Dr. Phil thread), and yes, it's that bad. His body is a nightmare. I've never seen someone relatively able-bodied be in such bad shape at the age of 37. And if he wasn't completely lying about his back injury and assuming it was a herniated disc or discs, he's definitely got some degenerative disc disease happening as a result of his lifestyle (99.9% sedentary) and diet.
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I usually feel really bad about my self-image because of my horrible Ankylosing Spondylitis which has caused my spine to curve into a stooped position, and caused me to get a hip replacement, and I’m Phil’s age. But, seeing Phil in his condition makes me not feel as bad, yet I still see red when he talks about his “horrible” back problems and how they’re debilitating to him and supposedly keep him from working and “driving on the highway” (?). Phil would honestly put a shotgun in his mouth if he had to deal with this A.S. shit, as much as he whines about the most trivial crap. I’d really give anything to just have a few bulging discs in my back.
 
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$80, three weeks from now, not even remotely sold out. This is how he's spending his day off.
 
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TheGoutinator said:
I like he used the word "promised", I doubt the person who said they might get it for him even said that.

Just a weasel word to gain more sympathy.
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TBF, the person did actually "purchase" it from the Amazon wishlist, not just say "yeah, I'm totes gonna do it". But as other people helpfully pointed out at the time, to their credits, this person could definitely cancel the purchase since it was basically a pre-order.

On an unrelated note, in today's "Totally Legit Things", user hexxiwatt subbed to Phil overnight, having never said a word in chat or even so much as followed Phil's channel. Now, the account follows 73 channels (and actual channels...not bot channels), but that seems a bit odd, no?
 
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bearsintrees said:
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$80, three weeks from now, not even remotely sold out. This is how he's spending his day off.
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You've probably heard the average American can't afford a $400 emergency. Well those people are damn lucky because Phil would apparently go destitute from $80. $80 he would probably make back before the prestream ended. Don't worry though one of his lucky fans with one of those easy 9-5 jobs getting minimum wage will help him out. That'll stick it to us damn dirty no good mentally ill detractors.
 
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didn't the guy who "promised" phil he'd get him the mini genesis also say "would you mind sending it back to me once you're done with it" to which phil said "no once its in my house its mine" perhaps this guy finally caught what phil said and said "fuck it, this guy won't give it back so im not going to even bother buying it for him, i'll just keep it"
 
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bearsintrees said:
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$80, three weeks from now, not even remotely sold out. This is how he's spending his day off.
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Sad. A pity tweet on how someone is not going to give him a sega mini. Just think about that.

What a child. Why would anyone give a shit if he gets it or not? I actually forgot about the piece of junk myself. No one was looking forward to it.

So the real question is, why tweet about it?
 
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