DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Kermit the Frog]

Boy oh boy, Phil has been really ramping up the begging today. Just out of pure coincidence, on the day before Kat's birthday, Phil is suddenly very worried about his bills. Uh huh, sure. More like he's gotta get the paypigs to pay for all the expensive meals he and Kat will be having.

I'm still dumbfounded as to how Phil's level of begging for money is allowed on Twitch. It's not that he's just saying "Give me money" because I could see that being okay if a bit gross, but Phil takes it up to the next level by saying "Give me money to pay my bills!" and "If I don't get the money, I can't stream anymore!" Phil even said that he will be fine the next time gets paid by Twitch, so to me at least this is a clear case of feigning distress, which is against the rules. Not even the Twitch thots pull this shit, making Phil even worse than they are. Hell, the Twitch thots will at least pretend to be grateful for the money and actually give the paypig the attention they desire; there's even the added bonus of them being girls. This is in stark contrast to middle-aged blob Phil who is more likely to berate you or even ignore the tip if he's in one of his pissbaby moods. His paypigs aren't getting a good return on their investment. As for Phil's "Loyalty Points" idea, he won't do a goddamn thing with it. Too much work, dood. It's just another short term gimmick to get his more competitive paypigs to have bit and tip wars for a reward that Phil will never deliver on. At best, it'll be a unique emote they can use for a limited time or some shit like that.

If Phil ever does go to Mixer, he'll manage to skate by on the razor-thin ice just like he has on Twitch. Maybe he'll get suspended a couple times until he learns what he can't get away with (namely labeling his rambling prestreams as gameplay) and be locked out of Mixer's promotions, but he'll most likely be able to stay once he begs for mercy enough. I just hope Mixer has the balls to actually hold Phil accountable.

 

[Shambler]

i didn't think dsp would bother typing in "goal" for anything less than a $1000
"there are no tip goals in ba sing sei"

 

[Salubrious]

Whats this? whats going on? whats the reward?

View attachment 924034

The reward is that DSP gets to pay his bills.

The reward for viewers is that DSP gets to continue to provide content.

If you are asking if there is anything extra, then you're a fucking selfish idiot because DSP doesn't have the time or money to provide that dood! He's already working non-stop and barely sees his wife, m'kay? It's impossible for him to stream an extra 30 minutes for reaching the goal.

 

[JamFlowMan]

Whats this? whats going on? whats the reward?

View attachment 924034

Might as well just say "i'm taking my wife to an expensive restaurant tonight please pay for it." Even the blind paypig could see through this charade. Yeah if he said that detractors would still give him shit, but paypigs would still give the cash. If your going to be called an asshole might as well be an honest asshole.

 

[1234567890abc]

I don't think DSP could surivive on Mixer; per their ToS:
View attachment 923928
He would be forced to either play the games and quit his 2 hour pre-streams or get Web Show vanished--two things he couldn't survive.

You're implying he will ever be banned off twitch. He is in the category of twitch thots at this point on the list of "DO NOT BAN EVER". Dave would have to literally pull his dick out on camera and masturbate even more awkwardly in the camera and even THEN he might not eat a ban.

I want to see him shit canned from twitch as badly as everyone else but it's not realistic.

 

[AckedyACK]

DSP is talking about implementing something called "loyalty points" into his chat/stream, which will reward subs and non-subs alike for "participating" in the chat/stream. I think it's some kind of Twitch add-on.

Oh, and he says he might name them "penne points". Yes, penne points, no joke.

Clip:
View attachment 923927
















-edit- Oh wow. He now is going into the specifics of his financial situation. In short: subs and cheers have been good the past month, but he has no money at the moment. Says he still has "three major bills" to pay before he gets paid by Twitch on the 15th, which includes a loan that he has to keep paying for the next two years. He's now begging for tips HARD.

He has added a tips goal of $100 per day (I think?) until he gets paid by Twitch:

View attachment 923910

Clip:
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Sorry I have to hit you guys with 9+ minutes of DSP doing his used car salesman routine, but he just wouldn't shut up about it.

-edit- And the begging worked instantly: someone tipped him $50.

View attachment 923935

He is actually using that fanart................................................ Not a children's entertainer.... look at the 'fanart' you're using you absolute muppet. FANart... it's in the name... and that is a child's drawing. Considering - judging by your leaderboard updates - you suck at adding 1 and 1 together, lemme explain it for you, real slowlike:

Fanart comes from fans. When 90% of your fanart, which comes from fans, is made by children, those children are your fans. Therefore, your fans aaaare...? That's right! Children!

Congratulations Phil, have yourself another bagel. Those double D's won't turn themselves into double Z's on their own! But if it's any consolation, you look in top shape for a man of 52. Keep on scamming kids, mentally handicapped and social outcasts, I'm sure on your deathbed you'll look back and be proud that your life had so much value and you left the world a better place than when you came into it.

He only needs to be smarter than the dumbest whales, and they're pretty stupid.

This simple line sums up how Phil is still here after 11 years of scumbeggary.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

You're implying he will ever be banned off twitch. He is in the category of twitch thots at this point on the list of "DO NOT BAN EVER". Dave would have to literally pull his dick out on camera and masturbate even more awkwardly in the camera and even THEN he might not eat a ban.

I want to see him shit canned from twitch as badly as everyone else but it's not realistic.

I agree he won't ever get outright banned by Twitch, but I don't think he's as well respected/protected as everyone believes. Phil is banned from the Twitch bounty program, which is a pretty big deal. While I'm sure there are a few other partners who are banned, it is by no means a common thing, and it is a big income loss for Phil. I don't know the exact amount the bounties pay out and I think each bounty can use a slightly different formula, but on smaller channels with around 200 views, the streamer has hinted they are worth at least a few hundred bucks. Bounties are generally incredibly easy to do. Some of them are only 5-10 minutes long and just involve watching an ad or two on stream and reading a product description. There have been several food related ones lately where you just do your normal stream, but have to have the product on screen for an hour. You don't even have to say anything positive (though that's obviously encourage) you just can't outright say anything deemed overly critical. With products like that, you can also toss in a referral link so if anyone buys it, you get some extra cash (though Phil is probably too much of a boomer to set this up) With games, you also get free codes and sometimes pretty popular games go up for bounties that you could do full playthroughs of after the fact.

Phil also hasn't been invited to do any of the Twitch hero (or whatever the system is called) streams where you do some sort of competitive thing against a bunch of other Twitch streamers and you get paid based on how well you do. These ones are a little more upfront with the payment system. It varies based on the competition or whatever, but the ones I've heard about give you a flat participation fee of several hundred dollars, then usually something like a $20-$50ish bonus based on kills/round advancement/whatever is relevant to the game, then an even bigger payment for 1st/2nd/3rd placement.

The main reason it is unrealistic for DSP to get banned from Twitch is that it's actually really hard to eat a Twitch ban. The big cases of someone getting banned are usually the exception to the rule and based more on the person being hugely popular that it looks bad if Amazon doesn't do anything, and even then, there are still cases where Amazon takes the PR hit and won't comment on someone doing something ban worthy. The other big ban worthy thing is if a bigger Twitch partner throws a fit to get someone banned, and while there are plenty of streamers who would be in the right to do it to Phil, they're smart enough to recognize it isn't worth being dragged into the goutsphere and recognize Phil badmouthing them is ultimately harmless because Phil is such a nobody. But, even if he isn't outright banned, he's still far from being Twitch's golden boy, and his general toxic behavior is causing him to lose access to easy money through the bounty/hero system.

 

[bearsintrees]

So he didn't hit the goal, and since there was no reward, it doesn't matter at all.

Place your bets as to whether he resets the goal for late stream.

 

[Pargon]

View attachment 924387

So he didn't hit the goal, and since there was no reward, it doesn't matter at all.

Place your bets as to whether he resets the goal for late stream.

Hahaha what a Simpsons/Futurama Richard Nixon-lookin' muthafucka.

$86 in tips for four hours' work. Phil should consider waiting tables if he wants to do even marginally better.

 

[Freshtodeath]

he's too autistic to be a waiter

 

[Muppetmode]

It’s still money for doing next to nothing

 

[ZehnBoat]

It’s still money for doing next to nothing

WHAT ARE YA TALKIN BOUT DOOD
STRIMMIN IS THE HARDEST JOB EVER, OKAY?
ALL THOSE OTHER JOBS ARE SUPER EASY
PHIL COULD DO IT WITH ONE HAND TIED BEHIND HIS GOUT BACK
BUT HE CANT CUZ HIS BACK DOOD
BUT HE'S THE MOST FIT HE'S EVER BEEN BECAUSE 10 YEARS AGO HE WAS SO FAT

 

[actually]

Place your bets as to whether he resets the goal for late stream.

I'll put 5 Jasper reveals on a reset. I'll put another 3 Jasper reveals on someone (heaving_earth, let's be honest) pushing it far enough beyond the goal that he effectively hits the daily total of $200.

 

[Mr.PiggyOinkOink]

He's going off on pre-stream on some guy who cheered saying that he should mute his snorts because they're off-putting.

Phil claims that to mute the mic takes preparation and planning beforehand, and that "two seconds" of "discomfort" hearing Phil snort should be tolerable, otherwise you're a "whiny asshole."

He can't react to his body's nervous system fast enough to mute the mic.
He snorts like he plays fighting games.

I hate how stupid the people that waste money baiting dark are, if they spent 5 extra minutes thinking before spazzing out they could get us some decent gold dust he would either have to ignore or just straight up lie about.

The person should’ve just asked why didn’t he burp or snort on the streams with kat or the sponsored streams he did.

Any of you nudniks reading this who like to throw shekels at him, stop using the same tired questions as bait. We already know if you ask him to stop snorting he’s going to sob about it being a medical condition, be a little smarter with your money and instead bring up the times we’ve seen him able to control his disgusting ticks.

Or better yet ask him if he snorts and burps when he’s eating with kat or sitting next to her on the couch, I want to hear him lie and say he does or go on a long rant that ultimately means he doesn’t respect his viewers in form

 

[actually]

Any of you nudniks reading this who like to throw shekels at him, stop using the same tired questions as bait. We already know if you ask him to stop snorting he’s going to sob about it being a medical condition, be a little smarter with your money and instead bring up the times we’ve seen him able to control his disgusting ticks.

Or, even better, don't give him a single cent and just @ him with these questions. Still a good chance he'll answer, and you get the double benefit of watching him beg for more money.

 

[Adamska]

Or, even better, don't give him a single cent and just @ him with these questions. Still a good chance he'll answer, and you get the double benefit of watching him beg for more money.

But if they did that, that'd be smart, and most of them are just fans in denial, making them dumber than his normal Pigcult.

So did anything happen in the 50+ pages I skipped? It hasn't exploded a lot, so I reckon probably not and Pig's just whinging and faking an emergency like he usually does to maintain his $90k/yr lifestyle of buying namebrand shit in impulse buys.

 

[bearsintrees]

So he didn't hit the goal, and since there was no reward, it doesn't matter at all.

Place your bets as to whether he resets the goal for late stream.

We all obviously got it right and he wants $200 a day until his twitch payment in 10 days.

 

[Draza]

We all obviously got it right and he wants $200 a day until his twitch payment in 10 days.

View attachment 924613

Hahaha what a scumbag. So typical of him.

 

[Salubrious]

I don't follow too many other streamers.

Are there ANY other streamers, at all, that regularly have tip goals with absolutely no incentive to meet them? I'm not talking about a once in a while "emergency" or anything, I mean not only do they regularly have goals with no incentive, but then get pissy when people ask for an incentive?

 

[bearsintrees]

I don't follow too many other streamers.

Are there ANY other streamers, at all, that regularly have tip goals with absolutely no incentive to meet them? I'm not talking about a once in a while "emergency" or anything, I mean not only do they regularly have goals with no incentive, but then get pissy when people ask for an incentive?

Sure, plenty. Lots of them won't stay online if they don't meet an arbitrary goal, and will just log off early instead of take their top off or ride their dragon dildo.

Oh, wait, you didn't mean camgirls on chaturbate?

Yeah, no one I've ever seen on Twitch has goals for nothing that get voided and started over after a single stream. That's only our boy.