Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Dom Cruise]

View attachment 1043721

"We will destroy Star Wars, then when it is done and even the EU is ashes, then you have my permission to die."

You're a big kid.

For you!

Honestly, I'd give the Buck Rogers project to a deovted indie filmmaker. Someone who, ya know, knows the source material and actually gives a fuck about it. I'd LOVE a resurgence of the era of goofy retro scifi serials. Buck Rogers is so iconic that even if you know almost nothing about the actual show you still know the name Buck Rogers and instantly associate it with Captain Kirk style space heroism.

God it'd be glorious. Fishbowl helmets and shiny silver space suits, bright flashing buttons on every piece of machinery, no fucks given about cheese levels so long as everyone is having fun, zany villains, scantily clad but still classy women as eye candy, corny one liners and comically expository dialog, random made up word riddled pseudoscientific nonsense.... fuck I miss Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon.

I think this is exactly where sci fi needs to go next, go back to the original source, that old school sci fi aesthetic would be amazing to see done with modern special effects.

 

[PseudoScrooge]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

I'm going to see Plan IX...the only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back, and will share. That part should be fun.

 

[Cyril Sneer]

When you buy your star wars toys, or any merch, the Rat gets a cut.

I thought the way that it worked was that Hasbro paid Lucasfilm a yearly lump sum for the (increasingly dubious) privilige of producing SW merch, so they would have a very clear incentive to not be left sitting on top of a mountain of unsold Rey, Finn and Rose figures.

Even as a kid I picked up on their whole "ahhhh, so!" style accents.

Though it's funny how Watto completely went over my head as a kid but today I look at him and go "Good grief, Lucas."

Was Watto Lucas's way of tweaking Hollywood's nose over the kvetching (see Spaceballs) at his successfully Jewing the Tinseltown Jews of the majority of revenue generated from the SW brand by securing complete control over merchandising rights? I guess we'll never know...

Yeah as much as I don't like the burying of old movies, I can understand why it would happen in this day and age.

Hey buddy, Space-Jews and Space-Chinese have as much right to be in this galaxy as humans.

I guess you could say.... "Its time to let old things die".

I'll go with the guy who said you can make a SW version of virtually any story you can imagine.

Literally every single bounty hunter looks better, even Dengar.

Dengar is the most bluecollar-looking of all bounty hunters.

Maybe cut out Boba Fett entirely, he really served as nothing but really lame fanservice and did nothing to make the character any better. He was better as a mysterious faceless badass, AotC just really didn't have to have him in it.

I can see what Lucas was going for. Boba Fett and Darth Vader have always been kindred characters to some extent, right from the beginning, with Vader originally having been envisioned, at one point, as being a bounty hunter of sorts like Fett ultimately became, and Fett having his genesis in an unused piece of concept art for Vader's armor. In AOTC, Lucas just made this explicit, with young Boba being a mirror image of young Anakin: a precociously gifted child raised by a devoted single parent and then violently orphaned.

 

[Uranus Pink]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

However, here is an angle none of you have heard yet, brace yourselves.

I mentioned my oldest before, because he's completely intoxicated on the Disney Koolaid....thinks TLJ was art and that Kylo's "arc mirrors Anakin's"....etc etc. We argue often about what we all know on this forum to be the truth, and I can't convince him.

WELL. He's bought my wife and I ROS tickets--opening night--and now made them our CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. What's more, he's asked that I stop texting anti-Disney Wars memes to the family group because "it's really negative."

So...(having been raised on REAL Star Wars) he's "emotionalized" Nu-wars, forced us to all go and see it, AND asked that I don't criticize it. Devious? A masterstroke of manipulation? (Before you ask, all those talents came from my ex-wife.)

The only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back. That part should be fun.

Missed the old days when a little shit tries to pull that stunt on their parents and siblings it is returned with an authorized ass whooping.

 

[Love Machine]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

However, here is an angle none of you have heard yet, brace yourselves.

I mentioned my oldest before, because he's completely intoxicated on the Disney Koolaid....thinks TLJ was art and that Kylo's "arc mirrors Anakin's"....etc etc. We argue often about what we all know on this forum to be the truth, and I can't convince him.

WELL. He's bought my wife and I ROS tickets--opening night--and now made them our CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. What's more, he's asked that I stop texting anti-Disney Wars memes to the family group because "it's really negative."

So...(having been raised on REAL Star Wars) he's "emotionalized" Nu-wars, forced us to all go and see it, AND asked that I don't criticize it. Devious? A masterstroke of manipulation? (Before you ask, all those talents came from my ex-wife.)

The only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back. That part should be fun.

How old is he? Genuinely Curious, because I gave up on behaviour like this when I was like 9.

 

[Pol Pots Pooter]

A reboot of Buck Rogers would be fascinating, considering how much of it was rooted in previous decades' zeitgeist. Fun fact: originally the character wasn't an astronaut, but a mining engineer and was named Anthony Rogers.

What's funny is...The Expanse is basically a non-campy reboot of Buck Rogers, at least up until Abaddon's Gate. Specifically, the Buck Rogers XXVC pen and paper RPG setting by TSR. Believe me, I wish I was fucking around on that one.

The only real differences are, in Buck Rogers there are more colonies, they're formed by alliances of corporations rather than formalized governments, and colonists received extensive gene therapy to survive their environments which caused rapid speciation. There's even a Protomolecule analog in the Buck Rogers RPG setting, except it's human-created instead of extraterrestrial.

 

[Vault Boy]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

However, here is an angle none of you have heard yet, brace yourselves.

I mentioned my oldest before, because he's completely intoxicated on the Disney Koolaid....thinks TLJ was art and that Kylo's "arc mirrors Anakin's"....etc etc. We argue often about what we all know on this forum to be the truth, and I can't convince him.

WELL. He's bought my wife and I ROS tickets--opening night--and now made them our CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. What's more, he's asked that I stop texting anti-Disney Wars memes to the family group because "it's really negative."

So...(having been raised on REAL Star Wars) he's "emotionalized" Nu-wars, forced us to all go and see it, AND asked that I don't criticize it. Devious? A masterstroke of manipulation? (Before you ask, all those talents came from my ex-wife.)

The only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back. That part should be fun.

I say humor him so that you don't come across as an asshole to your family, and give us the gory details afterward.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

With this garbage fire out next week, I will remind you all Trevorrow got luckily out of that shot show before it yanked his career.

 

[Adamska]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

However, here is an angle none of you have heard yet, brace yourselves.

I mentioned my oldest before, because he's completely intoxicated on the Disney Koolaid....thinks TLJ was art and that Kylo's "arc mirrors Anakin's"....etc etc. We argue often about what we all know on this forum to be the truth, and I can't convince him.

WELL. He's bought my wife and I ROS tickets--opening night--and now made them our CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. What's more, he's asked that I stop texting anti-Disney Wars memes to the family group because "it's really negative."

So...(having been raised on REAL Star Wars) he's "emotionalized" Nu-wars, forced us to all go and see it, AND asked that I don't criticize it. Devious? A masterstroke of manipulation? (Before you ask, all those talents came from my ex-wife.)

The only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back. That part should be fun.

Oh... I. I think I'd just ditch by intentionally food poisoning myself or plain old drinking ipecac. Not even because fuck the film, because you didn't pay for it and it's something that just happens. But mainly for the lesser reason of fuck you for forcing this shit on me, and then the far more important reason of having the absolute fucking gall to force me to deal with your shit on the opening night of a movie.

The latter's actually my bigger issue, since I intentionally watch a movie about a week after it comes out for a big reason; that reason being I know the types of shitheads that come out on opening night. I never want to deal with that shit if I can avoid it.

That's selfish bullshit, and I think you should bring that up after that shitshow of a movie ends and he cries like Butts does.

 

[Ghostse]

Or if Exogol's a planet in orbit about a black hole to boot because SyMBoLiSm.

(I also really find Mass Effect's depiction of Sagittarius A* (the black hole at the galactic centre) to be utterly wrong. Firstly, black holes, let alone supermassive black holes, have huge gravitational lensing, and the energy emitted as Hawking radiation as matter falls into them certainly isn't in the visible spectrum but as gamma rays and X-rays. There's also the fact that in the galactic core, there's tons of stars all in very close proximity to each other, often less than a light year apart. It would therefore be pretty much a solid wall of off-white space speckled with dust clouds and a negative space wedgie bending light in all manner of directions. Also just by stepping out the Normandy onto the Collector base Shepard and crew have probably absorbed enough radiation to make them permanently infertile and probably cancer-riddled within five to ten years.)

Everyone loves the black hole because of the time dilation making something you stick near a black hole gets ripped apart in seconds by its reckoning but tens of thousands of years to an outside observer. So if you wanted to leave a tablet of ancient wisdom or a gaint drawing of a penis, for future generations, you'd have it spiral into a blackhole.

So they put their cool ancient base near one because they don't get that the time dilation works both ways, and the difficulty of escaping.

 

[Oaat]

The loss of ambiguity is another thing that greatly bothers me about Disney-Lucasfilm's current management. I'm not sure how many are aware of this, but ever since TLJ, several Lucasfilm reps are taking a more pro-active role on Twitter in dismissing fan theories and discussion by answering questions as quickly as possible, leaving almost no room for speculation. Like people speculating on species or character parentage. A notable example was Hidalgo initally trying to dismiss any connection between Rey and Palpatine by saying Palpatine never had or made kids. Part of me wonders if this is due to the backlash caused by nu-fans getting mad about none of their Snoke theories turning out to be true. Would this be Lucasfilm's attempt at trying to stop angry theory spergs from being disappointed or something?

Somewhat related resurrection of one of the earlier points I tried to make in this thread:

"It's a movie about space wizards intended for children."

There used to be this ambiguity to Star Wars, like maybe it was just a fantasy world... or maybe instead, "the force" or something like it could actually exist, that we wouldn't understand and would call paranormal, but in the future perhaps people will have studied it and understand it like a science, so an organization like the Jedi could use it to their advantage reliably, making it seem like magic to us.

But in Disney Wars there's no more room for doubt. Laser shots arc. Bombers behave literally like WWII planes. A giant kraken lives in a space storm. And now hyperspace glows red because it leads to Palpatine. It's fantasy.

Shills critics accept all of this because "Star Wars was always meant to be a fantasy." But this thinking is so tip-of-the-iceberg-tier it hurts to hear it said so smugly from these wannabe intellectuals. There was so much more about Star Wars that could be discussed and speculated on instead of just saying "it's a fantasy/Flash Gordon homage" and shutting your brain down.

 

[Jaimas]

So apparently there are two camps around here, about purchasing Star Wars items in Current Year?

1) Buy nothing, whether OT toys or current movie tickets (duh) because if you buy something, Disney profits.
2)Buy some stuff if you like...it's a free country (unless you live in China or work for KK).

However, here is an angle none of you have heard yet, brace yourselves.

I mentioned my oldest before, because he's completely intoxicated on the Disney Koolaid....thinks TLJ was art and that Kylo's "arc mirrors Anakin's"....etc etc. We argue often about what we all know on this forum to be the truth, and I can't convince him.

WELL. He's bought my wife and I ROS tickets--opening night--and now made them our CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. What's more, he's asked that I stop texting anti-Disney Wars memes to the family group because "it's really negative."

So...(having been raised on REAL Star Wars) he's "emotionalized" Nu-wars, forced us to all go and see it, AND asked that I don't criticize it. Devious? A masterstroke of manipulation? (Before you ask, all those talents came from my ex-wife.)

The only positive side is, when the dumpster fire flares up to full conflagration, I'm not going to hold back. That part should be fun.

Options:

1. Is it in a multiplex? If so, go stag, redeem the ticket, go to a completely different movie you or the missus want to watch. Work out which one you're slipping into in advance. Security generally isn't paid enough to give a shit since you already technically paid. If he objects, fuck him, a lesson needs to be taught.

2. If not, scalp the ticket and get a nice dinner someplace.

 

[Dom Cruise]

Was Watto Lucas's way of tweaking Hollywood's nose over the kvetching (see Spaceballs) at his successfully Jewing the Tinseltown Jews of the majority of revenue generated from the SW brand by securing complete control over merchandising rights? I guess we'll never know...

Hey now, I will not have you besmirch the good name of Spaceballs.

And Lucas said he was honored to be parodied by Mel Brooks.

I don't think the stereotypes were really on purpose by Lucas, just stuff that kinda bled out when writing the characters, not him purposely going "this alien race are blacks, this alien race are Jews, this alien race are Japanese" etc.

 

[BipolarPon]

This is the most entertaining thread I've seen in a while, seeing a big franchise fall in a few years by corporate incompetence hostility,towards fans and having fanboys grief about it is entertaining as hell.

Can't wait to share my grief, like how they advertised Resistance having an anime style but instead it's cheap Disney junior -esque cell shaded cgi. The shafting of many alien species for mostly ugly brown mash potato deformed humanoids. Can we like get more Togrutas? There design is amazing. Star wars in general being way to human-centric. I know alien make-up can be expensive, but why are you're wasting most of the alien special effects, on such ugly bland designs. Also a lot of droid sidekicks, but rarely any alien film characters that matter to the story. That's the shit I can think of top of my head, besides the huge writing issues in the Disney trilogy.

On a positive note I like the mandalorian and rouge one, and Rebels was okay in my opinion, from now on I will refer to Ezra as Space Aladdin.

 

[Tootsie Bear]

Don't know if this was posted in this thread yet but Disney has warned the new Star Wars movies can cause seizures!
Disney warns its new Star Wars movie could trigger seizures in people with epilepsy

(CNN)"Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker," the highly anticipated conclusion to the Skywalker saga, could trigger seizures in photosensitive people, Walt Disney Studios said.
The company issued a statement with the Epilepsy Foundation warning viewers that the film contains "several sequences with imagery and sustained flashing lights" that could affect those with photosensitive epilepsy, the letter reads.
Disney suggested posting notices at movie theaters to warn viewers of the risk, Variety reported.
The company didn't elaborate on how the effects are used or what scenes they appear in. The company has closely guarded the film's plot...

 

[ditto]

I think this is exactly where sci fi needs to go next, go back to the original source, that old school sci fi aesthetic would be amazing to see done with modern special effects.

Star Trek 2009 showed that you can do the old school aesthetic, but there is no way the old school post-WWII positive earnestness will reappear. Everything is either quippy or deathly depressing.

 

[Jaimas]

Star Trek 2009 showed that you can do the old school aesthetic, but there is no way the old school post-WWII positive earnestness will reappear. Everything is either quippy or deathly depressing.

It will pass. It's an autistic phase and it will eventually move on, just like trends before it did.

 

[Creep3r]

The movie now has an official age rating on IMDB, its PG-13, and in Sweden its PG-11. Captain Sweden also confirms another one of the leaks by posting the obvious.

"It is rated 11. As the film contains a scary scene of a spooky man stealing the souls of people"
This pretty much confirms the leak of nu-Palpatine stealing Kylo Ren's soul and trying to steal Rey's before she mind hacks him and does the same by eating all jedi souls in existence to outpower him.

Also

DAY 8! 8 DAYS LEFT UNTIL PLAN 9: THE FALL OF SKYWALKER!

 

[verissimus]

The movie now has an official age rating on IMDB, its PG-13, and in Sweden its PG-11. Captain Sweden also confirms another one of the leaks by posting the obvious.
View attachment 1044215
"It is rated 11. As the film contains a scary scene of a spooky man stealing the souls of people"
This pretty much confirms the leak of nu-Palpatine stealing Kylo Ren's soul and trying to steal Rey's before she mind hacks him and does the same by eating all jedi souls in existence to outpower him.

Also

DAY 8! 8 DAYS LEFT UNTIL PLAN 9: THE FALL OF SKYWALKER!
View attachment 1044218

Why is it rated PG-13? I thought Star Wars was for kids dude bro?

 

[Stab You in the Back]

The latter's actually my bigger issue, since I intentionally watch a movie about a week after it comes out for a big reason; that reason being I know the types of shitheads that come out on opening night. I never want to deal with that shit if I can avoid it.

The passive aggressive move would be to show up on opening night cosplaying as Snoke (ie wearing nothing but a bathrobe and slippers).