حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[EI 903]

I'm going to be spending some time going back and re-capping as many of the Wrong Planet series as I can so newcomers to the thread don't see a ton of broken images and think Connor isn't worth discussing. Let me tell you, he is. As a rich roided up scumbag sociopsychopath I don't feel emotions like "love" or "respect" or "mirth" but he makes me feel things that could technically be described as that or as heart burn.

Thanks so much for being willing to do that, Smutley. It's a huge project, but very worthwhile.

 

[Dudeofteenage]

Also, who thinks Connor actually has diagnosed PTSD or if he's just picked up the term from the television?

I can't see what T could have caused a D. I know you don't have to go to Iraq or even experience something particularly violent to get PTSD, but the closest Connor's had to an experience that could actually cause PTSD (providing we take his word for it, which I'm somewhat loathe to do) is his dad pretending to shoot him with an empty gun, and I doubt that would cause PTSD - not just once, anyway.

Of course it could be that there's some trauma Connor has never told us about, but it would be very uncharacteristic for him to hide something like that.

 

[BriarHeart]

Guys. You guys. I just had an epiphany. I know why @Connor has written so much on forums about his novel while not actually writing the novel itself. I know why he knows so little about the actual plot and characterization of his supposed "life's work." Connor has never intended to write a novel. He wants to write a memoir.

Think about it. Whenever he talks about "the writing process," what does he reference? Stephen King's On Writing. Back when that book was released, the reading public was super-stoked, because holy shit, Stephen Freakin' King wrote a book all about his life and thoughts and opinions, how he struggled with substance abuse and almost died in that car accident, and all of the influences that led him to create the things that he's written, this is gonna be so cool! And it was interesting and poignant and super-cool, and everyone loved it.

That's what Connor is after. He wants other people to see him as deep and profound, to regard his thoughts and opinions as not just worthy, but superior to their own. He craves the narcissistic satisfaction of writing about writing, and hearing other people go "Wow, Connor, I never thought of something like that! That's so cool!" He wants the response that King received without actually putting in the work and effort of being Stephen King. So, he talks big about psychological themes and pop-culture "homages," exaggerates the inconveniences of his life into a heroic struggle, goes on for long stretches about his emotions and family struggles instead of advancing an actual plot (like in Meowthkip's round robin), and basically tries to do everything that an established career author writing a memoir would do, just without actually having to do anything memorable.

So, yeah. I advise everyone to stop trying to help Connor with his novel, because he's not writing a novel and he never has been. He's been using the barest skeleton of Redesigning Eva as a prop that lets him sign up for innumerable forums and do what he's actually meant to do this whole time: write about himself writing.

 

[FramerGirl420]

LMAO, John Hughes. Yep, Uncle Buck and National Lampoon's Vacation sure make me think of gritty dystopias. You know the only reason he mentioned John Hughes is because of The Breakfast Club, and we all know the reason he likes that movie (and it's not because he's seen it).

Ya, when I first started actively following Connor, I looked up John Hughes. Like "oh, let me see what sort of vibe Connor was aiming for!"
I was even more confused than I was before I knew what projects John Hughes had been involved in.

 

[Meowthkip]

Guys. You guys. I just had an epiphany. I know why @Connor has written so much on forums about his novel while not actually writing the novel itself. I know why he knows so little about the actual plot and characterization of his supposed "life's work." Connor has never intended to write a novel. He wants to write a memoir.

Think about it. Whenever he talks about "the writing process," what does he reference? Stephen King's On Writing. Back when that book was released, the reading public was super-stoked, because holy shit, Stephen Freakin' King wrote a book all about his life and thoughts and opinions, how he struggled with substance abuse and almost died in that car accident, and all of the influences that led him to create the things that he's written, this is gonna be so cool! And it was interesting and poignant and super-cool, and everyone loved it.

That's what Connor is after. He wants other people to see him as deep and profound, to regard his thoughts and opinions as not just worthy, but superior to their own. He craves the narcissistic satisfaction of writing about writing, and hearing other people go "Wow, Connor, I never thought of something like that! That's so cool!" He wants the response that King received without actually putting in the work and effort of being Stephen King. So, he talks big about psychological themes and pop-culture "homages," exaggerates the inconveniences of his life into a heroic struggle, goes on for long stretches about his emotions and family struggles instead of advancing an actual plot (like in Meowthkip's round robin), and basically tries to do everything that an established career author writing a memoir would do, just without actually having to do anything memorable.

So, yeah. I advise everyone to stop trying to help Connor with his novel, because he's not writing a novel and he never has been. He's been using the barest skeleton of Redesigning Eva as a prop that lets him sign up for innumerable forums and do what he's actually meant to do this whole time: write about himself writing.

You're right. Connor is nothing but a charlatan and a phony.

I hope he fucking reads that. I almost want him back so that he can answer for himself.

Just... goddammit, Connor.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

THINGS, 1989

"A husband whose fanatical desire but inability to father children drives him to force his wife to undergo a dangerous experiment. This results in hatching a non-human life form in his wife's womb, and the birth of a multitude of THINGS."

Does this make anyone else think of @Connor, or is it just me?

 

[Hat]

Does this make anyone else think of @Connor, or is it just me?

Hey, it's perfectly fine that he perform immoral biological experiments on his wife, just so long as he isn't adopting.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

You're right. Connor is nothing but a charlatan and a phony.

I hope he fucking reads that. I almost want him back so that he can answer for himself.

Just... goddammit, Connor.

when Connor comes back he is grounded grounded grounded grounded
EDIT: for 18293048274950 years

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Not trying to white knight, but I think the A-Logging is getting out of control here. Connor is a spoiled sheltered immature brat, not a monster like Nick Bate or Holden. A lot of people here are dog piling on him and resorting to playground insults. The dude's autism makes it hard for him to make positive changes, but it seems like he's trying to make some adjustments to his life rather than dismissing it all and cutting down his internet like a certain metallic knave. Things like this take months, even years of hard work and therapy to adjust and improve oneself and it's really petty of some of you to be so impatient with him. Calling him a "Whiny Fat Faggot" or trying to become the next Clyde Cash by impersonating Molly Ringwald is unproductive if you really want him to improve himself instead of trying to find the next CWC. Connor, at times, seems to have improved in his attitude and behavior but then regresses to his "fucky you" state because people continue to shit on him.

Connor, if you want my advice: stick to nonfiction writing. Maybe write an Op-Ed on something or do reviews of movies/tv shows/books. Having some solid base to write on benefits your autism because you have a tendency to be unoriginal. To begin, start a blog and begin recording your thoughts.

Next, be more respectful towards your parents. You don't know how good you have it. They're supporting your lazy ass taking only one class a week, feeding you, and sheltering you. You call them abusive because sometimes they get frustrated with your excessive autism, but if they hated you they wouldn't be doing that and would have kicked you out of the house at 18 and told you to get a job. Build up a good work ethic by helping out around the house even without being asked to do so and this will help you better transition into the work environment.

Finally, take a break from these forums and don't come back until you have something to show rather than coming in and saying something. I'm not telling you to get a job, I know how hard that shit is to balance school and work, but you gotta get out of the house and interact with people if you need to succeed at all in life. Volunteering at the library is a good idea because libraries tend to attract some freaks who will help you understand how well you have it in life compared to others because it seems like you've lived such a very sheltered life that you think being bullied in school warrants a self-diagnosis of PTSD. You know what gives you PTSD? Being raped/traumatically injured/experiencing war gives you PTSD. I couldn't drive on the freeway for a year after rolling a car five times going 70 miles an hour and, two and a half years later, still get panic attacks when people cut/slam their brakes in front of me. You just have a case of severe butthurt. Maybe these experiences from working at a library/food shelter/etc can give you inspiration to write about.

Be nicer to your friend. He probably resents you as well because you're such a massive dick to him. You're currently no jewel to be around, so beggars can't be choosers.

 

[Hat]

Connor, at times, seems to have improved in his attitude and behavior but then regresses to his "fucky you" state because people continue to shit on him.

I'm inclined to disagree with this statement. Connor may like the idea of changing, but he doesn't actually want to do the necessary work. He keeps going back to Wrong Planet and posting the same stuff because that's what is safe for him and it doesn't require the work that achieving his goals does; he would keep doing what he's doing now regardless of whether or not we made fun of him.

 

[Connor Bible]

Not trying to white knight, but I think the A-Logging is getting out of control here. Connor is a spoiled sheltered immature brat, not a monster like Nick Bate or Holden. A lot of people here are dog piling on him and resorting to playground insults. The dude's autism makes it hard for him to make positive changes, but it seems like he's trying to make some adjustments to his life rather than dismissing it all and cutting down his internet like a certain metallic knave. Things like this take months, even years of hard work and therapy to adjust and improve oneself and it's really petty of some of you to be so impatient with him. Calling him a "Whiny Fat Faggot" or trying to become the next Clyde Cash by impersonating Molly Ringwald is unproductive if you really want him to improve himself. Connor, at times, seems to have improved in his attitude and behavior but then regresses to his "fucky you" state because people continue to shit on him.

Connor, if you want my advice: stick to nonfiction writing. Maybe write an Op-Ed on something or do reviews of movies/tv shows/books. Having some solid base to write on benefits your autism because you have a tendency to be unoriginal. To begin, start a blog and begin recording your thoughts.

Next, be more respectful towards your parents. You don't know how good you have it. They're supporting your lazy ass taking only one class a week, feeding you, and sheltering you. You call them abusive because sometimes they get frustrated with your excessive autism, but if they hated you they wouldn't be doing that and would have kicked you out of the house at 18 and told you to get a job. Build up a good work ethic by helping out around the house even without being asked to do so and this will help you better transition into the work environment.

Finally, take a break from these forums and don't come back until you have something to show rather than coming in and saying something. I'm not telling you to get a job, I know how hard that shit is to balance school and work, but you gotta get out of the house and interact with people if you need to succeed at all in life. Volunteering at the library is a good idea because libraries tend to attract some freaks who will help you understand how well you have it in life compared to others because it seems like you've lived such a very sheltered life that you think being bullied in school warrants a self-diagnosis of PTSD. You know what gives you PTSD? Being raped/traumatically injured/experiencing war gives you PTSD. You just have a case of severe butthurt. Maybe these experiences from working at a library/food shelter/etc can give you inspiration to write about.

Be nicer to your friend. He probably resents you as well because you're such a massive dick to him. You're currently no jewel to be around, so beggars can't be choosers.

Thank you very much, my good sir. I can't believe this thread has gone on for this long. You know the only reason this was even set up was because I responded pretty badly to a Molly Ringwald joke that was in really bad taste?

 

[Smutley]

Thank you very much, my good sir. I can't believe this thread has gone on for this long. You know the only reason this was even set up was because I responded pretty badly to a Molly Ringwald joke that was in really bad taste?

That is not, at all, why this thread was created Connor.

 

[Cute Anime Girl]

Thank you very much, my good sir. I can't believe this thread has gone on for this long. You know the only reason this was even set up was because I responded pretty badly to a Molly Ringwald joke that was in really bad taste?

COME ON NIGGA. WHY DO YOU KEEP COMING BACK FOR MORE.

 

[Connor Bible]

Okay, so if it didn't, it at least provided a pretext for its creation.

 

[Hat]

Thank you very much, my good sir. I can't believe this thread has gone on for this long. You know the only reason this was even set up was because I responded pretty badly to a Molly Ringwald joke that was in really bad taste?

It's gone on this long because you've given the fire a lot of fuel.

 

[Chipmunk's Bounty]

@Connor, why did you stop responding to Meowthkip's round robin?

 

[Connor Bible]

@Connor, why did you stop responding to Meowthkip's round robin?

Because I realized I was being punk'd the moment he retconned the story.

 

[Chipmunk's Bounty]

Because I realized I was being punk'd the moment he retconned the story.

How were you being punk'd? Be specific, please.

 

[BriarHeart]

I'm inclined to disagree with this statement. Connor may like the idea of changing, but he doesn't actually want to do the necessary work. He keeps going back to Wrong Planet and posting the same stuff because that's what is safe for him and it doesn't require the work that achieving his goals does; he would keep doing what he's doing now regardless of whether or not we made fun of him.

Pretty much this. Thanks to @Smutley and his exhaustive archival efforts, we know that Connor's been pulling this shit on multiple forums long before this thread was started, and knowing him, it'll continue for as long as he can find an audience for his "problems" about his "novel."

Thank you very much, my good sir. I can't believe this thread has gone on for this long. You know the only reason this was even set up was because I responded pretty badly to a Molly Ringwald joke that was in really bad taste?

Speak of the devil. Howdy there, Connie! Make any progress on your "novel" yet? Or are you just here to write another 5000 words about your writer's block and your mother's sleeping habits?

 

[wagglyplacebo]

Because I realized I was being punk'd the moment he retconned the story.

For one @Meowthkip is a woman and two she was making it interesting.