People who talk constantly about 'self love' and 'self care' are the biggest messes generally and Tess is a prime example. The more someone prates on about lovin' themselves and 'doing self-care' the further you should usually run from the chaos they create, in my experience.
You don't need to talk about that stuff if you function normally, it doesn't even occur to you, because you have an inherent understanding of how to take care of yourself and the benefits it confers on your health, safety and general psychological wellbeing. There's no need to think in these terms or paste saccharine labels on doing what comes naturally - eating reasonably, washing yourself regularly, not acting out sexually in dangerous ways or pursuing deeply unhealthy relationships.
People who parrot that pop psych stuff are usually swinging between one crisis or another on a regular basis and have no idea in reality how to function normally. I also think narcissistic people LOVE those phrases, because it gives them the chance to talk about themselves and justofy doing whatever they actually want to do in the name of something that sounds deep and meaningful, such as 'self care'.
ETA: So, finally the truth of Tess's happy marriage with all the 'bomb sex' - two drunks and drug users, one morbidly obese, the other gay and hysterical, ignoring their kids except for photo-opportunities to sell their 'happiness'. Nobody surely can be surprised by this. Tess's kids are truly fucked.
