Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Nephi]

Don't be misogynistic, girls can be into Findom too if they want to.
YASH QUEEN!

 

[RapidUnplannedDisassembly]

You know what would be just a brilliant time to re-launch a line of parody clothing that particularly mocks sports?

Right in the middle of an epidemic where nobody's doing any fucking sports.

Strike while the metal's in the refrigerator, that's how the expression goes right?

 

[vertexwindi]

You know what would be just a brilliant time to re-launch a line of parody clothing that particularly mocks sports?

Right in the middle of an epidemic where nobody's doing any fucking sports.

Strike while the metal's in the refrigerator, that's how the expression goes right?

He should've done some clothes that say "some chinese guy ate a bat and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" or "corona: not just a beer anymore" or some such nonsense.

 

[Battlecruiser3000ad]

Another daughter to neglect, splendid.

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

He should've done some clothes that say "some chinese guy ate a bat and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" or "corona: not just a beer anymore" or some such nonsense.

I've literally seen both of these already so... yeah, he should do that, in order to continue his tradition of being waaaaayy behind the pop culture curve.

 

[Zaryiu]

We need a pool on how long until Low-T turns against Logan

 

[Karl der Grosse]

"I sacrificed my dignity to the internet and all I got was a fanbase of junkies and troons"

 

[Leonard Helplessness]

2004 called. It wants its goon shirt back.

I never bought any SA merch but when I visited Lowtax's office during 2014 he was handing his old merch out for free, so I got a City Name Sports Team hat. It was the worst hat I ever owned -- shit material, non-elastic non-adjustable fastener, extremely uncomfortable to the point that I tried it on for like a minute and never again.

All his merch was in a huge pile in a corner of the main room of the office suite and I remember it being dusty. He probably threw the rest away after the office closed.

 

[smackpops]

"I sacrificed my dignity to the internet and all I got was a fanbase of junkies and troons"

and a couple million bucks n life of leisure.

 

[Pickle Inspector]

k
This was asked days ago but Hard Rock Nick could have a thread here, and the thing is that goons found him and make fun of and harass him but it's not even on SA, it's on Facebook. There have been a couple of threads that spilled over from fb since he is a good subject for whatever SA used to be but they were never terribly active.

Anyway Nick is totally weird and also deserves ridicule for his lies and attitudes towards women but he never had anything to do with Lowtax until he decided to try to sue him for having a pretty inactive thread.

I've been told that non-goons have latched onto Nick and taken things even further but the truth is people touch him all the time and he blocks, goes private and generally hurts him in the balls when people do it, yet he keeps on posting the same ridiculous shit everywhere. I have seen some mainstream stuff about Nick so the normies are starting to notice.

Other than that I see LowT continuing to do the same shit he has been which is getting rather old to me personally; carry on

Edit: There's this I guess. I'm not even giving all the thirstposting the time of day. Totally cured you guys! It's actually just a major mood disorder with psychotic features! Great news!

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I imagine this relationship will go about as well as Shmorky and his bipolar girlfriend.

Lowtax gave me a bunch of free "City Name, Sports Team" merch too. He does it to all the girls, Logan. I still have it collecting dust in my closet somewhere. I remember a couple years ago when Lowtax tried to revamp his merch line, and a bunch of the shirts he sent out were missing the designs on the back or came out all distorted and shitty, and he made a huge hassle about giving people refunds. I'm not even sure if he actually ever gave them the refunds. Logan, perhaps during your business-y business day of being a business woman, you should probably QC the merchandise to make sure it isn't haphazardly slapped together by your boyfriend in a benzo haze like it was last time.

Also did Logan just not see that SA post LowT made about not paying her an actual salary? That she would be paid in a kind of mid-level marketing scheme style? Logan is the type of person who's dumb enough to buy into Amway and actually believe it's a 'business opportunity that will change your life.' If you're dumb enough to believe that SA can not only turn a profit at this point, and that LowT is actually going to pay you anything but pennies for your effort, you're dumb enough to join Amway. It's kind of hard to turn a profit when most of your consumer base is living on scammed disability checks. But if you like being paid in unwashed whisky dick, I suppose Logan is the richest woman in the world.

All this talk about salary is making me want to see a Tiger King-esque documentary about the history of Something Awful where they interview all the people involved over the years.

 

[The Grognard]

I imagine this relationship will go about as well as Shmorky and his bipolar girlfriend.

All this talk about salary is making me want to see a Tiger King-esque documentary about the history of Something Awful where they interview all the people involved over the years.

Making such a documentary would be quite a herculean effort because the site has deep lore and people who know the most are also quite elusive. Lowtax himself wouldn't be worth talking to because he doesn't actually know that much about the forum his whole rotting being is clinging on.

 

[DonaldChump]

He pays her in dick dollars.

He probably funds her drug habit alongside his.

 

[WonderWino]

"I sacrificed my dignity to the internet and all I got was a fanbase of junkies and troons"

Rule of acquisition 109: 'Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack' seems relevant

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

All his merch was in a huge pile in a corner of the main room of the office suite and I remember it being dusty. He probably threw the rest away after the office closed.

It's so adorable that you think he went to the effort to throw that junk in the dumpster as opposed to just leaving it behind for the landlord to deal with when he left for the last time.

 

[Tanner Glass]

It's so adorable that you think he went to the effort to throw that junk in the dumpster as opposed to just leaving it behind for the landlord to deal with when he left for the last time.

I think it's substantially more likely he has all of the overstock and that's what he's going to be reselling this time around. Shit that's been sitting in boxes for 5+ years.

 

[Mr. Boogedy]

I wonder why Lowtax thought that he had to have an inventory of pre-made merch instead of using a print-on-demand service like Cafepress or partnering with a dedicated merch company. I know it's because Lowtax is incompetent.

 

[Nephi]

I wonder why Lowtax thought that he had to have an inventory of pre-made merch instead of using a print-on-demand service like Cafepress or partnering with a dedicated merch company. I know it's because Lowtax is incompetent.

Buying in bulk is cheaper, both in a transportation and manufacturing sense, considering that Lowt is a penny-pinching goy it shouldn't surprise you.

 

[Pissmaster]

I never bought any SA merch but when I visited Lowtax's office during 2014 he was handing his old merch out for free, so I got a City Name Sports Team hat. It was the worst hat I ever owned -- shit material, non-elastic non-adjustable fastener, extremely uncomfortable to the point that I tried it on for like a minute and never again.

All his merch was in a huge pile in a corner of the main room of the office suite and I remember it being dusty. He probably threw the rest away after the office closed.

It's not Lowtax, but that reminds me of the one thing I ever bought on SA Mart: a blue "It is a mystery" shirt, when that smiley was new.

It's the thinnest, weakest shirt I have ever owned, and started looking ghetto after the third wash. I'm pretty sure it was an iron-on, so it's impressive that whomever sold those managed to find the shittiest shirts ever. Like, you can get perfectly good cheap shirts at Walmart for $4 a pop.

Why didn't they just do that?

I wonder why Lowtax thought that he had to have an inventory of pre-made merch instead of using a print-on-demand service like Cafepress or partnering with a dedicated merch company. I know it's because Lowtax is incompetent.

Maddox did that too, you can see his shelves of unsold shirts in the old Biggest Problem videos. I guess web 1.0 stars just refuse to move on from how e-commerce was done in 1999.

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

I wonder why Lowtax thought that he had to have an inventory of pre-made merch instead of using a print-on-demand service like Cafepress or partnering with a dedicated merch company. I know it's because Lowtax is incompetent.

Because those services hadn't been invented yet in 2003 when he had all that crap printed up, and even if they existed, it would have been legitimately prohibitively expensive to print on demand in the quantities that Low-T wanted.

 

[the clap]

All this talk about salary is making me want to see a Tiger King-esque documentary about the history of Something Awful where they interview all the people involved over the years.

It'd be worth it for the interviews with previous mods, where they'd have to do it through prison glass.