I know the perfect way to salvage TLOU2:
Get up to the point where Abby is about to murder Joel. Except then Richard from Hotline Miami appears, throws Abby to the ground effortlessly, and then proceeds to go "Would You Kindly" on her face with a golf club. When the bitch is finally dead, a blood soaked Richard then looks at Joel, Ellie, and whoever the third chick is, before holding up a cassette player. He hits the play button, and the voice on the tape asks "Do you like hurting people?"
The game then suddenly ends.
Abby is John Henry swinging that golf club, bam, bam, bam, while Ellie cries out in vain futility. Abby, arm muscles garroted with pulsing blue veins, prepares to bring down the final blow.
Joel smiles through the mask of blood. He starts laughing.
Abby starts laughing. Ellie chuckles in spite of herself. "What?"
Abby and Joel, laughing harder. Louder. Howling. Abby offers Joel a body positive helping hand. He takes it, utilizing her upper body strength to return to his feet. Now they're doubled over, and when the golf club's foam head pops off, their laughter turns to
screams.
Joel, in tears, peels the ketchup packets off his face. He and Abby are having to support each other now. Joel beckons Ellie over. She joins them in a mental breakdown of a group hug.
Amid the joyous insanity, "
Warf!" A dog comes pattering in. It almost knocks Joel down trying to lick away the ketchup. Ellie does a quick flick of a lighter. Joel points. "Ah!' The laughter continues.
But then a bout of reflection comes over them, and their boisterous outpouring fades in an odd moment of emphatic understanding. The dog watches the trio. Its tail has stopped wagging, for it, too, sees the reality.
"So, are we it, then?" Ellie asks. "The Last of Us?"
"No," Abby says, her square face somber. "We're the first. Only the beginning."
Fade out, roll credits.
