حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Chan the Wizard]

@Meowthkip is right. I think you'd be better suited writing for a visual medium.
Just don't get depressed if it doesn't work out. Rarely are writers successful at their first gig and it's a hard field. You're going to get rejected. Famous writers were rejected all the time and still are.
If it's something you enjoy and want to do, you're going to have to practice all the time, accept criticism and expect rejection.
I'm not telling you this so you give up or get depressed, I just want you to understand it's not something that happens over night and talented people slave over it day in and day out and still receive rejection letters.

 

[Chipmunk's Bounty]

So I'm sure you've left by now @Connor, but how's Camp NaNoWriMo doing, anyway? You haven't given us an update on the word count since the second or third day.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

Man, first a shorter-than-usual Homestuck update, & now Connor isn't gonna post anymore Alphaboy? It's like life is kicking me in the balls.

Seriously, though, while I'm kinda bummed, it's @Connor's choice, & I can dig that.

EDIT: >tfw you're open about everything but embarrassed to out yourself as Homestuck trash

 

[Stratomsk]

It's not going to be a big budget movie, y'know. If he likes the shorts, and if I write a script for him, we'd have to look for someone willing to put just a little bit of money into it. It'd probably go direct-to-video/television, maybe have an ultra-limited run in a couple of theatres. Nothing really earth-shaking.

Albert's a genre movie veteran. He's been at work since the early eighties, and even churned out some quality B-movies for Cannon. His most well known movies are the 1990 Captain America adaptation, the Jean-Claude Van Damme movie Cyborg, Andrew Dice Clay's Brainsmasher: A Love Story, the Nemesis series...

You are already making a reasonable effort. Alphaboy wasn't perfect by any means, but it was leagues better than your previous stories. Write for your own enjoyment and best of luck trying your hand at screenwriting.

Even if it doesn't go well, you can at least be comfortable with the fact that is better to have tried and failed than to have never tried in the first place. An essential aspect of creativity is not being afraid to fail and using your failures to learn from your mistakes.

 

[Abby]

Probably a good idea not to post it here. This place definitely isn't the kind of the place for that.

I'm with everyone else that I'm kinda bummed we won't be able to read anymore of Connor's writing. I said it before, but Alphaboy was a huge improvement and I was sort of looking forward to the next installment. I wish there was a place Connor could post it where some of us could check it out, but that probably wouldn't be a viable option here.

Best of luck with writing, @Connor . Does this mean you'll be leaving the Kiwi Farms (again)?

 

[Philosophy Zombie]

He better not. He's like the forum pet. We would miss him! Even if he doesn't post Alphaboy, he should still visit.

Spoiler: powerlevel

today I ended up pitying myself over an easily surmountable obstacle and I reminded myself to suck the fuck up because I was acting like Connor. Sometimes you need to be reminded that no, life is not kicking you in the balls.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

He better not. He's like the forum pet. We would miss him! Even if he doesn't post Alphaboy, he should still visit.

Spoiler: powerlevel

today I ended up pitying myself over an easily surmountable obstacle and I reminded myself to suck the fuck up because I was acting like Connor. Sometimes you need to be reminded that no, life is not kicking you in the balls.

Heh, iknorite? YOU CAN'T LEAVE! FRIENDS FOREVER, CONNOR

Spoiler: kinda power leveling?

I have a tendency to get upset over trivial things (I'm playing the mental illness card on this one), so whenever I encounter a problem, I preemptively add "it feels like life is kicking me in the balls" to it. If it sounds absolutely fucking ridiculous, then it's not worth getting your jimmies rustled over. So you get statements such as:
"I went to McDonalds & they ran out of McGriddles, it feels like life is kicking me in the balls"
"I bought these cherry donut holes & they taste like ass, it feels like life is kicking me in the balls"
"the lady a few apartments down is freaking out because she thinks someone is locking her door from the inside when she's really just turning her key the wrong way, it feels like life is kicking me in the balls"

I call it "Do-It-Yourself Connortive Behavior Therapy."

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

I agree that it was probably a good idea not to post Alphaboy here. Even if it was of Faulknerian quality, people would still shit on it because Connor wrote it and I feel like a number of people here don't feel like giving him a chance. I still think Connor should focus on writing nonfiction and do movie reviews, though. If you want to stick to your guns and continue to write fiction, I'd recommend taking it to a writing forum for some objective criticism from people who don't know who you are... also don't dox yourself obviously.

 

[FramerGirl420]

Heh. This went as expected. Like I pointed out in my last post, folks are shitting on him no matter what. Sending mixed signals. He already has the tism to deal with.
But folks in this thread be like "just write whatever. It's a first draft, it's gonna be shitty! Just write to get back into the habit of actually writing!"
And then Connor is all: "well here's my first draft."
But then folks be like: "THIS IS SO MUCH SHIT. CAN YOU EVEN TRY TO NOT BE SUCH A SHITTY PERSON?? HERE, LET ME OUTLINE EVERY LITTLE THING YOU DID WRONG IN THIS FIRST DRAFT WE TOLD YOU TO WRITE WITHOUT CARING IF ITS CRAP"
And now that he caught onto this pattern, he's doing the right thing and just keeping his work to himself.
And now everyone is begging him to post more of Alphaboy and come back. Why?? He has nothing to gain from it.
Of course criticism is really needed when writing, but the way the majority of you folk handle it... It's not at all helpful and is mostly degrading.
Sorry about the wall of text, but jeez,you folks have been acting even worse than Connor has.

Anyways, ya, good on @Connor for keeping his latest story to himself.
As much as I've enjoyed the bit he posted, I understand why he would want to keep the rest out of the public eye after the way he was treated here.

One last thingy: @Connor , you keep on doing what you do!

 

[wagglyplacebo]

Heh. This went as expected. Like I pointed out in my last post, folks are shitting on him no matter what. Sending mixed signals. He already has the tism to deal with.
But folks in this thread be like "just write whatever. It's a first draft, it's gonna be shitty! Just write to get back into the habit of actually writing!"
And then Connor is all: "well here's my first draft."
But then folks be like: "THIS IS SO MUCH SHIT. CAN YOU EVEN TRY TO NOT BE SUCH A SHITTY PERSON?? HERE, LET ME OUTLINE EVERY LITTLE THING YOU DID WRONG IN THIS FIRST DRAFT WE TOLD YOU TO WRITE WITHOUT CARING IF ITS CRAP"
And now that he caught onto this pattern, he's doing the right thing and just keeping his work to himself.
And now everyone is begging him to post more of Alphaboy and come back. Why?? He has nothing to gain from it.
Of course criticism is really needed when writing, but the way the majority of you folk handle it... It's not at all helpful and is mostly degrading.
Sorry about the wall of text, but jeez,you folks have been acting even worse than Connor has.

Anyways, ya, good on @Connor for keeping his latest story to himself.
As much as I've enjoyed the bit he posted, I understand why he would want to keep the rest out of the public eye after the way he was treated here.

One last thingy: @Connor , you keep on doing what you do!

You should mom shame threads more often, it's awesome. You're right of course, the thread shouldn't be about disparaging Connor at every turn, even though it's pretty fun. This is the most he's done in a long time so he deserves at least a little credit for that.

 

[Connor Bible]

So, I was working on short stories today.

 

[Stratomsk]

So, I was working on short stories today.

Go on.

 

[Connor Bible]

I'm working on three this week.
The Conversationalist- A Mafia hitman in New York strikes up conversations with his targets before killing them.
No More Lullabies- A young mother, unable to sleep, kills her allegedly mutant baby. Or does she?
It's The Principle of the Thing- A college student seeks bloody revenge on a boy who had a crush on her in high school.

 

[Dormiebasne]

I'm working on three this week.
The Conversationalist- A Mafia hitman in New York strikes up conversations with his targets before killing them.
No More Lullabies- A young mother, unable to sleep, kills her allegedly mutant baby. Or does she?
It's The Principle of the Thing- A college student seeks bloody revenge on a boy who had a crush on her in high school.

Do you have excerpts you'd like to share?

 

[Connor Bible]

Do you have excerpts you'd like to share?

No.

 

[Dormiebasne]

No.

Well, alright then. How much progress have you made?

 

[Connor Bible]

I'm not sure yet, Dormie. A good length for a short story is anywhere between five and twenty-five pages. I'm still laying the groundwork, and from there, I can figure out how long the shorts can be.

 

[Dormiebasne]

What constitutes laying the groundwork, exactly? Are you devising an outline or...I don't understand what exactly you mean?

 

[Connor Bible]

I was writing a bit of each story, at least two pages. I introduce the characters, describe the setting, hint at the rest of the plot, etc.

 

[BriarHeart]

I was writing a bit of each story, at least two pages. I introduce the characters, describe the setting, hint at the rest of the plot, etc.

Why aren't you writing them now? Daylight's a-wastin', boy.