Artcow WogglebugLoveProductions / Cynthia Hanson / Cherie Anne Hapney - One Womanchild's Fruitless Quest to Make Her Cockroach Husbando a Household Name

[Sm0kINHaZefEEliNBlaZEd]

I literally read this sentence five times and still don't know what the fuck she is talking about here. Not in my most blackout tits up drunk state I would write a word salad like this.
If she was a normal person, I would think she was shitfaced when she wrote this.

It took me a while to figure out what she was saying, but in translating from Autist to English I got something like: "Revealed here are/is the story(s)(?) that happen in between Frank Baum's first five Oz books. The plight of the Wogglebug and the creation of his alter-ego, one of depravity and disgrace, is explored."

Pretty sure that's what she's going for. But it makes me wonder even more, if she did hire an editor, did they just take the money and run? I mean, if what's on the back is any indication of what's inside, they'd have to rewrite the whole fucking book. @WogglebugLover, did you hire an editor? Seriously, how much did you sink into this?

 

[WogglebugLover]

I never hired an editor.

 

[Sam Losco]

Just in case it hasn't been done, here's her full Amazon author bio.

Cynthia Hanson discovered the Oz books when she was 12-years-old. When she read about the Wogglebug character she was able to quickly see far beyond the perception of the "others" and then in no time at all he became her favorite character of all time. Then she soon developed a desire to enable the rest of the world to see beyond how he was portrayed in the majority of the Oz books.

She aspires to build a franchise around him which is mostly separated from the Oz fandom so that he may at long last stand out on his own and take a stand in the spotlight as he was always meant to do. She is avidly dedicated to renewing the fame and popularity of Mr. H.M. Wogglebug T.E. for the modern world, and to make him a positive role model for children of the the future. Unlike so many others, she does not believe the Wogglebug is not worthy of being such.

She is the Founder and Owner of her WogglebugLove Productions. She takes pride in the fact that she is not a team player in the "Oz community" at all. She wouldn't have written in the Oz fandom if the Wogglebug didn't have his roots in it. She never plays by "the rules" of writing about the Wogglebug when she works with him in Oz. She wants all to know her publishing once through "Tails of the Cowardly Lion and Friends" was a mistake. She made this mistake out of desperation to publish. She demands anyone who has a copy of "Professor Wogglebug and the Frogman of Oz" get rid of it and replace it with a copy of her own "Mr. Wogglebug, the Frogman, and Terry Volume 1: How the Truth Can Heal" which is the only rightful title.

She self-publishes her personal brand of picture books and novels starring the Wogglebug. Some are Oz-related and other tie-in with her movies. She also writes screenplays and produces animated movies of both short and feature lengths starring the Wogglebug. Favoring the genres of Family, Fantasy, and Sci-Fi.

Her first animated movie, "The Wogglebug's First Adventure with Sylvie" is set for release in 2019 on DVD. Followed by a series of a series of movies about the Wogglebug's life beginning anew in the Land of Genoma.

 

[The Husbando Collector]

I never hired an editor.

Of course you didn't you fucking dolt. The writing is all over the place. The number one thing that every aspiring published writer should get is a fucking editor to make sure that the prose isn't a bunch of word salad. You god damned idiot.

Others, feel free to rate me MOTI but this shit gets under my skin.

 

[Deadpool]

I never hired an editor.

Noooooooo your writing is so polished and wonderful I assumed it went through a rigorous editing process! That was sarcasm btw. I know you're extremely retarded (and ugly) so I felt the need to explain it.

 

[Miss Misery]

Upon reading Cherie's excerpts, editors around the world wept.

(Except not really, because no one wants to read her shit prose and fix her atrocious grammar and punctuation -- not even if she paid them.)

 

[AnOminous]

>She demands
>The only rightful title

Pure autism.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

I never hired an editor.

Sweetie, we can tell.

 

[drain]

@WogglebugLover you know my dude, if you just hired an editor and asked for help with writing your shit instead of falling for nigerian scammers and god knows what else, you know, maybe, just maaaybe your chances at delivering a better work would increase a little.

She refuses to do the most normal thing ever, which is hiring an editor, in favor of throwing her money at the first stranger that lies to her saying they love her work.
The mind. It blows.

 

[The Last Stand]

Because lines like "First, the long since unknown of scenes that took place in-between the known of ones in the first five books of Oz history he appears in revealed. Thus is also revealed how and why he underwent a terrible transformation at the point he did and remained in the state of his disgraceful alter-ego for over a century." make my fucking head spin.

And this is why I hate reading. You've officially ruined a beautiful language with that ... mess.

I never hired an editor.

You NEED to go back to school.

 

[howyadoin]

You NEED to go back to school.

This. Have you considered taking GED classes, Cynthia? Once you get a GED, you can attend community college to study Creative Writing.

 

[The Last Stand]

@WogglebugLover you know my dude, if you just hired an editor and asked for help with writing your shit instead of falling for nigerian scammers and god knows what else, you know, maybe, just maaaybe your chances at delivering a better work would increase a little.

If I was her editor, heaven forbid, I'd just tell her to scrap it entirely.

 

[Curt Sibling]

Excuse my ignorance, but I am going to assume the Woggleroach is public domain? Otherwise lawyers would have stopped this project by now.

 

[AnOminous]

Excuse my ignorance, but I am going to assume the Woggleroach is public domain? Otherwise lawyers would have stopped this project by now.

Some of the Oz books are public domain and some aren't. The Wogglebug was introduced in The Marvelous Land of Oz, which has been public domain since 1960. Other Wogglebug appearances like Neill's The Wonder City of Oz are still copyrighted. So you couldn't infringe the character itself, but you could infringe some incarnation of it or some copyrighted content.

I'm pretty sure this bloodsucking pedophile murderbug never appeared in any movies so you'd be safe from infringing those.

 

[Sm0kINHaZefEEliNBlaZEd]

I never hired an editor.

So do you even read over your work? Look at Mr. Wogglebug's Second time Around.

An embarrising spelling error in the third sentence and then it completely falls apart in the fifth sentence. Hell, do you even understand the purpose of putting words on the back cover? It's not to give a point by point recap, although talking dinosaurs sound pretty rad. They'd be a formidable foe for a fifty foot fire-breathing Wogglebug.

 

[NyQuilninja]

Is this racist?

 

[Deadpool]

So do you even read over your work? Look at Mr. Wogglebug's Second time Around.
View attachment 1400830
An embarrising spelling error in the third sentence and then it completely falls apart in the fifth sentence. Hell, do you even understand the purpose of putting words on the back cover? It's not to give a point by point recap, although talking dinosaurs sound pretty rad. They'd be a formidable foe for a fifty foot fire-breathing Wogglebug.

"Cynthia Hanson's unique writing style" so incomprehensible garbage?

 

[Roast Chicken]

@WogglebugLover

Part of me has hope that you'll learn, and stop working on this crazy obsession with a 4th rate Oz character.

But the more cynical part of me hopes you work on this for years and years until its "perfect" like the autistic version of the "thief and the cobbler" story.

I can picture an elderly Cynthia shuffling around an old folks' home, clutching her grotty Wogglebug plush and telling the nurses and other residents about the Wogglebug movies and books she's producing. She'll probably die with that doll in her decrepid arms.

 

[drain]

I'm not even being mean now, and this isn't banter, but Cynthia can't write for shit and I'm not saying it for the sake of roasting her. She literally lacks in the literacy department. How can a native english speaker butch words and sentences like this?

@WogglebugLover you should return to school immediately. Like, for real. No chance in hell you'll be an author, let alone a children's author (you know, rule one when writing books for kids is creating a simple to understand story.)
I'm a grown ass adult and couldn't make heads or tails of your writing, let alone a child. Please reconsider spending your money and time learning how to fucking write like an adult, ffs.

 

[Kosher Dill]

View attachment 1400901
Is this racist?

No, it's equally horrifying to all living beings.