Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[A Cardboard Box]

Now now, give credit where credit is due: he's also produced 2 daughters who hate him and want nothing to do with him, a 3rd daughter he's essentially abandoned, a string of disastrously failed relationships, multiple police reports, at least 3 battered women, and countless empty bottles of Ambien and boxes of wine.

It's so fucking sad when you really break down his life into minute detail and chronological order. It's a tragedy in slow motion.

If you take any single snapshot of his life, it's not great, but not horrific.

1. Divorce: okay that's sad, but there's other fish in the sea
2. Kids hate him: one day maybe he can repair those relationships
3. Makes a substantial amount of money from a website, that is slowly dying: hey maybe he can revitalize the site and make a comeback!
4. Abuse allegations: a little tougher but by no means fatal. There aren't even any charges filed!
5. Another failed marriage: a lot of people have two divorces. Third time's a charm?
6. Drug habit: everyone has private demons to cope with. I'm sure with dedication and counseling he can overcome.

It isn't until all of these things are taken together that you truly realize the absolute, abject failure this man is. It's like he was genetically engineered to be a fuckup.

I love it.

 

[Never Scored]

Now now, give credit where credit is due: he's also produced 2 daughters who hate him and want nothing to do with him, a 3rd daughter he's essentially abandoned, a string of disastrously failed relationships, multiple police reports, at least 3 battered women, and countless empty bottles of Ambien and boxes of wine.

Also the Super Kansas City Worldskippers. That was kind of funny when I was 20 years old.

I tried to watch it maybe two-three years ago though and it made me cringe so hard my testicles went up inside me and they still haven't come back out.

 

[Technics99]

are there pics of injuries or medical reports of dv?

 

[A Cardboard Box]

are there pics of injuries or medical reports of dv?

Afaik nothing concrete.

 

[CharlesBarkley]

Low effort stolen from the SA thread. I laughed.

 

[haunted vagina]

SA COMMUNITY: LET MAKE ACCOUNTS FREE TO GROW THE COMMUNITY AND GET A TRAFFIC AND FIND OTHER WAYS TO MONITIZE THE BRAND

LOWTAX: NOO NOO EVERY FREE ACCOUNT SIGN UP IS MONEY THAT COULD GO TO MY SPINE REE REE REEE GOLDBELLY MANGOSTEEN MY DICK.

I'm gonna disagree here - the model of "provide something that people will only use if it's free, get into huge debt for development and hosting costs, have no clear way to make a profit" is what killed almost every Tech Bubble 1.0 company and is still a brain disease among a lot of Silicon Valley (Twitter being the most obvious example of something that costs insane amounts to operate and has lost money over its lifetime because it took 15 years to get to the point where it could charge significant money for ads). Lowtax actually figuring out how to monetize Internet comedy made sense and at one time the notion of "a forum that isn't a disorganized mess of people yelling catchphrases" was worth paying for. If he had solved the technical issues by 2010 or so and continued to provide a product that "people interested in humor" would buy as opposed to becoming a political death cult, he'd be fine.

Isnt Mike like a conservative Christian as well? I mean, I ain't much of a religious guy, but I assume most people would consider Goldbelly the height of gluttony and waste.

Whatever else he is (was there a thread here about the recent drama over the Earthworm Jim guy going full Scott Adams on their podcast?) Mike Nelson is, like the rest of the MST3K crew, someone who has a very small-town Midwest attitude towards the need to work for a living. They want to keep producing new content and not just take the opportunity to do a convention circuit signing DVDs of a 25 year old TV show for the rest of their lives. I think Lowtax's refusal to evolve his brand past 2003 and unsustainable lifestyle would disgust all of them, even the much more liberal ones.

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

2. Kids hate him: one day maybe he can repair those relationships

Can you imagine being his kids in school being asked what their parents do for work? "And what job does your father have?" Awkward silence as they try to think of something to say that diminishes the shame.

Then they settle on, "he's homeless on the street addicted to drugs." because the truth is so much worse.

 

[White Devil]

Can you imagine being his kids in school being asked what their parents do for work? "And what job does your father have?" Awkward silence as they try to think of something to say that diminishes the shame.

"My mom makes maple syrup and my dad ran a successful dot com enterprise until he retired in 2006."

 

[A Cardboard Box]

Can you imagine being his kids in school being asked what their parents do for work? "And what job does your father have?" Awkward silence as they try to think of something to say that diminishes the shame.

Then they settle on, "he's homeless on the street addicted to drugs." because the truth is so much worse.

"Dad? Yeah he's uh... an entrepreneur and web personality. No don't google him."

 

[Badungus Kabungus]

"Dad? Yeah he's uh... an entrepreneur and web personality. No don't google him."

"We don't know but everything important that happened in the world in the last generation is somehow connected to him. The ancient tablets say he is the punished one, the one who is guided by the hand of Kek, the unknowing herald of madness and chaos which will engulf the word like unstoppable wildfire." *eyes roll back, starts foaming at mouth*

 

[sperginity]

are there pics of injuries or medical reports of dv?

the cop from megan's report made note of injuries consistent with her story, as well as observing blood on richard's arm (while he denied things got physical at all).

The ER logan went to gave her discharge papers for victims of physical assault.

Both of those things are a good indication of photographic evidence existing, taken by people who are unlikely to be fabricating evidence.

Until the court date in september there isn't much chance of directly seeing any pictures. If logan chickens out we may never see it.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

According to what I hear, Jeffrey is a bitcoin millionaire

I kind of doubt that‘s true only because in my experience rumors of ppl having “millions“ almost never turn out to be true or they are vastly exaggerated, esp if the mountains of money are supposedly from bitcoin or day trading.

We have a resident lolcow Troon (James “Katie“ Charm) who supposedly made $2 million in bitcoin three years ago, yet today he lives in squalor in a efficiency flat with two roommates who hate him and had to sell his car (and his major only asset) last year to make ends meet. Bitcoin windfall winners tend to treat their money like gamblers who hit it big - it’s gets pissed away or gambled away in more bitcoin very fast.

Jeffery might have some cash on hand thanks to bitcoin. But if he’s ready to throw down real cash for an asset he’s never seen the legit accounting on to some guy like Lowtax, that cash is going down the shitter real fast one way or another.

Also curious about that tax lien situation with Lowtax. He might be able to con Jeffery in paying off his tax debt “so he can sell SA”. A tax lien or debt will prevent any sale until it’s satisfied. I could see the IRS seizing the entire sale price if someone tries to pay Lowtax for it.

 

[White Devil]

Until the court date in september there isn't much chance of directly seeing any pictures. If logan chickens out we may never see it.

Goon attention span being what it is, and Logan being fucking nuts, I feel like it would almost be a safe bet that she will chicken out. She's seen first hand how Lowtax lives and she knows the goon money well has ran dry on that. I don't think his parents will support her as well as him.

 

[sperginity]

Goon attention span being what it is, and Logan being fucking nuts, I feel like it would almost be a safe bet that she will chicken out. She's seen first hand how Lowtax lives and she knows the goon money well has ran dry on that. I don't think his parents will support her as well as him.

?? The court date is for criminal charges, the date was written on the card from a detective with a case number. It has nothing to do with money.

 

[White Devil]

?? The court date is for criminal charges, the date was written on the card from a detective with a case number. It has nothing to do with money.

Well, I am a moron who does not read closely then.

 

[Trip Chesterton III]

I kind of doubt that‘s true only because in my experience rumors of ppl having “millions“ almost never turn out to be true or they are vastly exaggerated, esp if the mountains of money are supposedly from bitcoin or day trading.

We have a resident lolcow Troon (James “Katie“ Charm) who supposedly made $2 million in bitcoin three years ago, yet today he lives in squalor in a efficiency flat with two roommates who hate him and had to sell his car (and his major only asset) last year to make ends meet. Bitcoin windfall winners tend to treat their money like gamblers who hit it big - it’s gets pissed away or gambled away in more bitcoin very fast.

Jeffery might have some cash on hand thanks to bitcoin. But if he’s ready to throw down real cash for an asset he’s never seen the legit accounting on to some guy like Lowtax, that cash is going down the shitter real fast one way or another.

Also curious about that tax lien situation with Lowtax. He might be able to con Jeffery in paying off his tax debt “so he can sell SA”. A tax lien or debt will prevent any sale until it’s satisfied. I could see the IRS seizing the entire sale price if someone tries to pay Lowtax for it.

Yeah. I have to imagine Jeffrey will have a very hard time finding a lawyer who would be willing to do this work for him, at least without VERY STRONGLY advising against making this purchase

 

[Peep Plops]

Yeah. I have to imagine Jeffrey will have a very hard time finding a lawyer who would be willing to do this work for him, at least without VERY STRONGLY advising against making this purchase

But you see that's why he needs to hire a brand manager. I happen to know one just became available and has applicable experience.

 

[Goy Sheckelstein]

Yeah. I have to imagine Jeffrey will have a very hard time finding a lawyer who would be willing to do this work for him, at least without VERY STRONGLY advising against making this purchase

A lawyer will take whatever client. A financial advisor would try to talk Jeff out of it

 

[Badungus Kabungus]

Came across more old Lowtax photos. Here are some classic ones.

 

[haunted vagina]

He's always going to look kind of dorky, after all he was a video games journalist who then became a Web industry maven. But at one point he also looked like a dork who was groomed, bathed, and fit. Alcoholism is a hell of a thing.