Containment What will happen when Barb dies?

[CwChalk]

Seeing that Chris can't even handle a simple court show up without Barb wrangling him the whole time. Who can Chris turn to, to even organized the funeral? Barb's estranged family? The Church? Social services? Weens?

He's not entirely incompetent when it comes to arranging things, but when it comes to money he hits a wall. Dying is expensive. Rocky Shoemaker likely considered this herself and help with arrangements since she's familiar with the family's woes, even though she retired. If Chris asks for donations to help with the funeral, weens and enablers will undoubtedly give a hand with finances.

 

[Fapcop]

Seeing that Chris can't even handle a simple court show up without Barb wrangling him the whole time. Who can Chris turn to, to even organized the funeral? Barb's estranged family? The Church? Social services? Weens?

I’d say the church would help, but wasn’t that always more of a Bob thing, and hasn’t the Chandlers been kind of estranged from church ever since he passed?

Chris could probably manage to put together a funeral, with ample help from the undertaker: “Sign here, who do you want to invite? What kind of music do you want?” That kind of stuff.

Chris is exceptional, but they’re used to dealing with people temporarily exceptional because of grief and shock, so at the end of the day (and unless Chris just lets Barb because Magichan told him to) there will be a funeral of sorts.

As for who’s paying? Barb would strike me as the kind of person who has some sort of “funeral insurance”. She knows Chris after all, and is selfish enough to ensure she’s taken care off even when dead.

 

[AnOminous]

As for who’s paying? Barb would strike me as the kind of person who has some sort of “funeral insurance”. She knows Chris after all, and is selfish enough to ensure she’s taken care off even when dead.

Bob bought that shit when he bought the package. They usually sell that as a package deal.

 

[ggalin]

when barb dies, chris will hang her dead decapitated body on the wall and make her into one of his fever dream characters

super mega sonicbarb

 

[Terrorist]

He's not entirely incompetent when it comes to arranging things, but when it comes to money he hits a wall. Dying is expensive. Rocky Shoemaker likely considered this herself and help with arrangements since she's familiar with the family's woes, even though she retired. If Chris asks for donations to help with the funeral, weens and enablers will undoubtedly give a hand with finances.

Seeing that Chris can't even handle a simple court show up without Barb wrangling him the whole time. Who can Chris turn to, to even organized the funeral? Barb's estranged family? The Church? Social services? Weens?

Bob bought that shit when he bought the package. They usually sell that as a package deal.

I think Barb will most likely be cremated with no fanfare unless Chris requests otherwise.

Does Barb have a will and do we know anything about it? Can't imagine the Chandler estate is worth much of anything except for the house that he'll lose to the bank when she croaks.

 

[AnOminous]

Does Barb have a will and do we know anything about it? Can't imagine the Chandler estate is worth much of anything except for the house that he'll lose to the bank when she croaks.

I'd almost bet she doesn't because why would she give a fuck what happens when she's dead?

 

[Alex Krycek]

Hello, when Barb dies do you think Chris will wear blackface? I once saw a picture involving Nick Bate in Prison that depicted Chris in Blackface and a vest with black people. Chris has experienced some issues with racial dysphoria he should wear blackface and be a Tomgirl when Barb is dead. That way he can truly experience what his true race is and stop pretending to be Sonichu. Do you agree or disagree that he should wear blackface? And why?

@Shiversblood I want your opinion on this.

 

[CwChalk]

Chris could probably manage to put together a funeral, with ample help from the undertaker: “Sign here, who do you want to invite? What kind of music do you want?” That kind of stuff.

You know, I just thought about this as it's likely Chris will try reaching out to Cole Smithy again. If Cole had a stronger reaction to Bob's death than anybody expected, what are the odds that he'd go see Chris after Barb is gone?

 

[Terrorist]

I'd almost bet she doesn't because why would she give a fuck what happens when she's dead?

Figured as much, though I thought it was possible Bob might have made her write one.

 

[Shiversblood]

I don’t think Christian Weston chandler will wear black face after barbs dies. I know he has in the past tho.

 

[Fapcop]

You know, I just thought about this as it's likely Chris will try reaching out to Cole Smithy again. If Cole had a stronger reaction to Bob's death than anybody expected, what are the odds that he'd go see Chris after Barb is gone?

I think it’s very likely that Barb’s passing will make Cole quite sentimental, make him realize that life is brief, and it isn’t too late to reconnect with Chris and try to re-establish a relationship.

He’ll look him up on Twitter, see what looks like a mentally disturbed, homeless lady ranting about MyLittlePony, Pokemon and other dimensions.

And then he’ll regain his senses, chuckle at accidents of genetics and upbringing and how fortunate he is and go fuck his wife long and hard. And that’ll be the end of that.

Will Cole go to the funeral? Nah. Maybe afterwards and privately.

 

[Roger Whore]

Seeing that Chris can't even handle a simple court show up without Barb wrangling him the whole time. Who can Chris turn to, to even organized the funeral? Barb's estranged family? The Church? Social services? Weens?

Enablers most likely will start a go fund me in line with Chris’- I mean Barb’s wishes which will most likely be the most inexpensive option. Following that, Chris will probably buy more legos with the left over money, probably neglect the mortgage and be kicked out of his house and that’s when adult services will step in. From there... who really knows. I’m sure given his history, Chris will be restricted from the internet more than ever before and we may just lose contact with arguably everyone’s favorite lolcow. Dark times are indeed ahead.

 

[Fapcop]

Enablers most likely will start a go fund me in line with Chris’- I mean Barb’s wishes which will most likely be the most inexpensive option. Following that, Chris will probably buy more legos with the left over money, probably neglect the mortgage and be kicked out of his house and that’s when adult services will step in. From there... who really knows. I’m sure given his history, Chris will be restricted from the internet more than ever before and we may just lose contact with arguably everyone’s favorite lolcow. Dark times are indeed ahead.

Nah man... Worst case scenario, we will have to get used to hearing the phrase: “This is Christinewestonchandler comi livetoyou from McDonald’s onceagain!”

The internet has been the One semi-stable thing in his life all these years, and his number one source for asspats and human contact.

There is no way he will forego that.

Chris may become a vagrant and a tramp lugging a miniature horde around in a shopping cart.

But he won’t go without his internet presence, YouTube videos or autistic tweets.

 

[CwChalk]

How's he gonna get his My Little Pony? Regardless of his complaints about the new show, you know he's gonna watch that shit anyway.

 

[Fapcop]

How's he gonna get his My Little Pony? Regardless of his complaints about the new show, you know he's gonna watch that shit anyway.

Lololol

Nothing quite says: “The new bitch has arrived” as dragging a cart full of MLP shit behind you, on your first day in the homeless encampment.

Chris is going to spend most of his monthly tugboat in protection money. Fortunately, there’ll be some weens ready and willing to replenish it, so I don’t feel too bad for him.

 

[Tiger Tanaka]

Hypothetically speaking, and not at all planning this, but on a scale of 1 to 10 how Ween would it be to attend the funeral in a Pickle costume but try to act like a figment of Chris's imagination?

 

[Fapcop]

Hypothetically speaking, and not at all planning this, but on a scale of 1 to 10 how Ween would it be to attend the funeral in a Pickle costume but try to act like a figment of Chris's imagination?

Depends. If you had done it in 2010 you would be sitting on Clyde Cash’s right hand side in the hall of epic lulz.

In 2020? KF would try to dox you and you’d get threads hundreds of pages long about how you need to get prosecuted and how to get police involved.


If anyone deserves to get weens in picklesuits at their funeral, it’s prob. Barb. You know, as a tribute to Chris’s all time greatest troll.

 

[AnOminous]

Hypothetically speaking, and not at all planning this, but on a scale of 1 to 10 how Ween would it be to attend the funeral in a Pickle costume but try to act like a figment of Chris's imagination?

Unless you actually steal the corpse, you're just a pussy.

 

[Fapcop]

Unless you actually steal the corpse, you're just a pussy.

Could we get a “Barbs corpse saga” where Chris has to deal with weens having stolen her corpse and who’ll only will give it back if he fulfills their conditions?

 

[Tiger Tanaka]

Unless you actually steal the corpse, you're just a pussy.

You're right. You'd need to go Big Boss Man vs Big Show tier, and frankly, you're trolling yourself at that point,