Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[ZMOT]

In a way, this picture from the Disney's Galaxy's Edge VR game probably sums up the general atmosphere of Lucasfilm in the Current Year.

as a fan as VR and considering all the cool shit you could do with it and starwars (even when beat saber beat them to the punch), I still have honestly no idea what that galaxy edge vr shit is supposed to be. interactive tour? low effort walking simulator? anything they could possible do without making a full-blown game would still be expensive as fuck, since it's VR and you can't use the usual shortcuts to cheapen out (as in models need to look good up close, sound good - which means more than the bare minimum VA works, optimization to hit the framerate to not make people puke their guts out etc).

Bloodlines 2, I would've liked to see his take on the medium for as much as it would've been able to shine through the filter of woke garbage peddled by those landwhales Paradox calls a "team". I say this because the game's senior writer is none other than Cara Ellison, a sour Twitter harpy and gaming journo whose one claim to fame is getting triggered over pixelated rape in Hotline Miami 2 and writing an article on PC Gamer that raised enough of a shitstorm to have the game be banned in Australia.

I'm surprised paradox didn't clean house after onyx path almost caused an international incident. otoh they are swedes, so it shouldn't be surprising.

 

[RiceofSkywalker]

I'm surprised paradox didn't clean house after onyx path almost caused an international incident. otoh they are swedes, so it shouldn't be surprising.

The Chechnya thing? Yeah, Paradox handled it the old-fashioned way, found a scapegoat and then focused on memory-holing it. It also helps that their woke orbiters have the memory of goldfish.

I don't expect anything good to ever come out of Paradox again. They were once a decent dev/publisher, putting out games that were sometimes overpriced (DLCs galore), but often enjoyable. Now they became yet another cookie-cutter company pushing out lazy rehash sequels and DLCs topped with progressive bullshit to make up for lack of creativity.

Back on topic though:

Anyway, since things have slowed down as of late, should I continue the cosmic shitpost or continue waiting for @Gallofag, @BipolarPon and others to get back from vacation?

I'm eager to hear more about it before Disney announces that Tittymilk Monster from TLJ will get its own D+ show and jumpstarts this thread again.

 

[Aqua Panda]

As a quick aside, finished Fallen Order after having it gifted to me awhile back.

I'm mixed, it has a lot of good going for it and it is a breath a fresh air in the always online microtransaction hell that is modern gaming.

However, it has some serious optimization issues. Even the pro mode struggles to hit a constant 30 fps, I highly recommend getting it on a high quality PC with an SSD to brute force it as much as possible for best results.

The story and characters are fun and enjoyable but a few needed more time. The night sister you recruit on Dathomir literally joins up right before the final area of the game and doesn't do much. It's obvious she was meant to do more in the story and it's also obvious she was meant to be the love interest. I'm betting a whole romance arc was cut somewhere along the line.

Overall, the game needed to be longer. I'm willing to give a sequel a go if they keep to "no microtransactions" and expand the planets and force powers. Vader and the rest of the remaining inquisitors should be on their asses after the final area of the game.

 

[Ghostse]

As a quick aside, finished Fallen Order after having it gifted to me awhile back.

I'm mixed, it has a lot of good going for it and it is a breath a fresh air in the always online microtransaction hell that is modern gaming.

However, it has some serious optimization issues. Even the pro mode struggles to hit a constant 30 fps, I highly recommend getting it on a high quality PC with an SSD to brute force it as much as possible for best results.

The story and characters are fun and enjoyable but a few needed more time. The night sister you recruit on Dathomir literally joins up right before the final area of the game and doesn't do much. It's obvious she was meant to do more in the story and it's also obvious she was meant to be the love interest. I'm betting a whole romance arc was cut somewhere along the line.

Overall, the game needed to be longer. I'm willing to give a sequel a go if they keep to "no microtransactions" and expand the planets and force powers. Vader and the rest of the remaining inquisitors should be on their asses after the final area of the game.

Fallen order is a completely average game with an average story with below average moments/execution.
AFIAC this makes it 2019's game of the year by a wide margin.

There are some serious great moments that they manage to completely ruin (A character stepping to vader and getting Yeeted, only for a "lol j/k, not really"). But really the only real issues I took were:
a) Jedi/force sensitives were implied to be incredibly rare in OT/PT. But apparently like 4 trillion of them survived Order 66 because every single fucking story in the twenty four years of the empire involves them finding ANOTHER two or three jedi who survived the purge.
b) characters making ridiculous decisions because if they don't, it fucks with the time line. (It'd been better if you just never found the Macguffin or had to destroy it instead of the absolutely pants-on-head retarded reasoning they came up with later)

 

[White Devil]

I enjoyed Fallen Order a lot. Yea, it was flawed as fuck but it's still the best SW game we've had in awhile, especially considering it's EA running the video game ship right now. I personally thought it was a little too linear and short, the combat was merely eh, and there being no dismemberments a big turn off, but then again it's the Mouse. I also thought the Ninth Sister was a distraction, being a big whatever the fuck she is instead of being human. I don't know why Disney gets off making the Empire cartoon villains and then goes and violates their xenophobic policies.

Other than that, yea it was enjoyable. The cinematic part of the game, like the early train escape, were super well done. I liked Cal as a character, he wasn't a whiny little bitch.

 

[Wulfpack Legend]

Just when you thought Disney had dumb ideas for Star Wars:

https://twitter.com/Disney/status/1293943435196616704

 

[White Devil]

Is it bad I can't tell whos who in the top picture?

 

[Creep3r]

I enjoyed Fallen Order a lot. Yea, it was flawed as fuck but it's still the best SW game we've had in awhile, especially considering it's EA running the video game ship right now. I personally thought it was a little too linear and short, the combat was merely eh, and there being no dismemberments a big turn off, but then again it's the Mouse. I also thought the Ninth Sister was a distraction, being a big whatever the fuck she is instead of being human. I don't know why Disney gets off making the Empire cartoon villains and then goes and violates their xenophobic policies.

I personally hate the nu-Inquisitorius and their uniforms. Its just black skin suits with oddly shaped biker helmets that lend no room to uniqueness or individuality, made all the more worse by how they all wield the same retarded helicopter saber. They're supposed to be an elite task force made up of ex-jedi or indoctrinated children each given unique training to best handle specific environments and opponents, yet here they're all the same cutout cartoon villains just a step above stormtroopers for the most part. As for FO, the best thing I can say about it is in regards to Cal, in that he's probably the first nu-Disney OC who isn't an obnoxious cunt or some rainbow-flavored marty stu/mary sue, but the overall visual look of the game and his retarded Kylo Ren time stopping power irks me.

Anyway, in case anyone here didn't see it:

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/disney...l-media-from-its-live-action-catalogue.74769/

Looks like everything is going in the vault for the sake of glorifying Disney+. This will probably piss of the OT purist cucks who were hoping Disney would ever release the unedited version of the OT.

In other news...
1: The writer for SW.com is a boot-licking faggot who wants Rian Johnson to peg him deeply, and Twitter just keeps getting worse.

>honors the legacy and mythology
Nothing about Disney except Luceno's books, the Anakin/Kenobi comic and a few insignificant bits from Solo and Rogue One do this.

2: It turns out that nobody working on the films actually knows jack dick about Star Wars outside of skimming the OT once before working on the film as a mandate.

For example, they claim they don't know how big the Death Star is despite being stated to be the size of a small moon and countless references in both pre and post Disney giving exact measurements, other idiots thought the Death Star in ROTJ is the same Death Star from ANH, others thought the Emperor died in ANH, and they think Chewbacca was never given a medal despite both old and Disney shit saying Wookiees don't like awards and Disney and Marvel doing an awful promotional event and comic run a few years back for TFA dedicated solely to Chewbacca and his fucking medal and how he gave it a way to a gender-ambiguous kid. Then there's this:

3: In case anyone ever brings up that SW is far more consistent and less retarded under Disney, just show them this:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AZtSidFfVWgK8fjyUS3pH7DjxDft9UdchdImlLIdudo/edit

And this was written by a guy who actually likes Disney shit. For those not interested in TL;DR. here's the overall gist:

The author should've also added to the header there that this one group of 5 or so people (or more specifically Aladdin controlling space whales) was also responsible for annihilating the Empire's largest and most powerful fleets single-handedly and making every single one of the Empire's top brass including the Emperor himself look like a fool. And he even discovers the location of Kenobi with little effort in a way that makes you wonder why the Emperor and Vader didn't do the same. And to top it all off he finds the abandoned control room of the Gods and just fucks around in there all willy nilly. With their success rate, why the Hell were Han, Luke and Leia even needed? Hell Luke is inferior to Space Aladdin in every conceivable way.

And if Disney+ rumors are to be believed, he's getting a sequel series all about finding him and returning to save the Galaxy, so who needs Luke really amirite mouseketeers?

Hell, and that's just from the Rebels section alone.

Just when you thought Disney had dumb ideas for Star Wars:

https://twitter.com/Disney/status/1293943435196616704

View attachment 1517403
View attachment 1517394View attachment 1517400

They just keep finding new ways to outdo themselves. A fucking Lego Holiday Special adaptation with Rey and the Disney gang. Also so much for Doomcock's bullshit about Disney erasing the sequel trilogy. We're getting this plus a retarded Oscar Isaac prequel story.

 

[White Devil]

Im sorry dude but I stopped reading after that retard implied that TLJ is better than ESB. I can only take so much retardation in a single day.

 

[Ihavetinyweewee]

I personally hate the nu-Inquisitorius and their uniforms. Its just black skin suits with oddly shaped biker helmets that lend no room to uniqueness or individuality, made all the more worse by how they all wield the same retarded helicopter saber. They're supposed to be an elite task force made up of ex-jedi or indoctrinated children each given unique training to best handle specific environments and opponents, yet here they're all the same cutout cartoon villains just a step above stormtroopers for the most part. As for FO, the best thing I can say about it is in regards to Cal, in that he's probably the first nu-Disney OC who isn't an obnoxious cunt or some rainbow-flavored marty stu/mary sue, but the overall visual look of the game and his retarded Kylo Ren time stopping power irks me.

Anyway, in case anyone here didn't see it:

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/disney...l-media-from-its-live-action-catalogue.74769/

Looks like everything is going in the vault for the sake of glorifying Disney+. This will probably piss of the OT purist cucks who were hoping Disney would ever release the unedited version of the OT.

In other news...
1: The writer for SW.com is a boot-licking faggot who wants Rian Johnson to peg him deeply, and Twitter just keeps getting worse.
View attachment 1517376
>honors the legacy and mythology
Nothing about Disney except Luceno's books, the Anakin/Kenobi comic and a few insignificant bits from Solo and Rogue One do this.

2: It turns out that nobody working on the films actually knows jack dick about Star Wars outside of skimming the OT once before working on the film as a mandate.

For example, they claim they don't know how big the Death Star is despite being stated to be the size of a small moon and countless references in both pre and post Disney giving exact measurements, other idiots thought the Death Star in ROTJ is the same Death Star from ANH, others thought the Emperor died in ANH, and they think Chewbacca was never given a medal despite both old and Disney shit saying Wookiees don't like awards and Disney and Marvel doing an awful promotional event and comic run a few years back for TFA dedicated solely to Chewbacca and his fucking medal and how he gave it a way to a gender-ambiguous kid. Then there's this:
View attachment 1517382

3: In case anyone ever brings up that SW is far more consistent and less retarded under Disney, just show them this:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AZtSidFfVWgK8fjyUS3pH7DjxDft9UdchdImlLIdudo/edit

And this was started by a guy who actually used to like Disney shit apparently. For those not interested in TL;DR. here's the overall gist:
View attachment 1517391
The author should've also added to the header there that this one group of 5 or so people (or more specifically Aladdin controlling space whales) was also responsible for annihilating the Empire's largest and most powerful fleets single-handedly and making every single one of the Empire's top brass including the Emperor himself look like a fool. And he even discovers the location of Kenobi with little effort in a way that makes you wonder why the Emperor and Vader didn't do the same. And to top it all off he finds the abandoned control room of the Gods and just fucks around in there all willy nilly. With their success rate, why the Hell were Han, Luke and Leia even needed? Hell Luke is inferior to Space Aladdin in every conceivable way.
View attachment 1517406
And if Disney+ rumors are to be believed, he's getting a sequel series all about finding him and returning to save the Galaxy, so who needs Luke really amirite mouseketeers?

Hell, and that's just from the Rebels section alone.


They just keep finding new ways to outdo themselves. A fucking Lego Holiday Special adaptation with Rey and the Disney gang. Also so much for Doomcock's bullshit about Disney erasing the sequel trilogy. We're getting this plus a retarded Oscar Isaac prequel story.

If I'm reading the article correctly: Star Wars is exempt. They will continue 4k releases of the films...

 

[Creep3r]

Im sorry dude but I stopped reading after that retard implied that TLJ is better than ESB. I can only take so much retardation in a single day.

Well I did warn that the guy who wrote it was a devout Disney fan, just one who is willing to consume all their crap to the most minute material but still point out all of its flaws.

 

[HeyYou]

I don’t think Star Wars as a whole has ever particularly ascribed to those descriptors. At least not in the last 30 years. It’s a fucking series for children at the end of the day. This thread has got to be one of the spergiest cringefests I’ve seen on this entire site. See: the fucking literal novels thrown up every other post bitching about other fans of the exact same series they are fans of. The prequels sucked. The sequels sucked. 99% of the EU sucked. I have a soft spot for the OT, but that’s entirely because I saw them as a child and it’s completely tinted by nostalgia. They’re not paragons of cinema. All this autistic slapfighting is embarrassing.

Mike, when did you make an account on Kiwi Farms?

 

[HandsomeDan]

I personally hate the nu-Inquisitorius and their uniforms. Its just black skin suits with oddly shaped biker helmets that lend no room to uniqueness or individuality, made all the more worse by how they all wield the same retarded helicopter saber. They're supposed to be an elite task force made up of ex-jedi or indoctrinated children each given unique training to best handle specific environments and opponents, yet here they're all the same cutout cartoon villains just a step above stormtroopers for the most part. As for FO, the best thing I can say about it is in regards to Cal, in that he's probably the first nu-Disney OC who isn't an obnoxious cunt or some rainbow-flavored marty stu/mary sue, but the overall visual look of the game and his retarded Kylo Ren time stopping power irks me.

Anyway, in case anyone here didn't see it:

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/disney...l-media-from-its-live-action-catalogue.74769/

Looks like everything is going in the vault for the sake of glorifying Disney+. This will probably piss of the OT purist cucks who were hoping Disney would ever release the unedited version of the OT.

In other news...
1: The writer for SW.com is a boot-licking faggot who wants Rian Johnson to peg him deeply, and Twitter just keeps getting worse.
View attachment 1517376
>honors the legacy and mythology
Nothing about Disney except Luceno's books, the Anakin/Kenobi comic and a few insignificant bits from Solo and Rogue One do this.

2: It turns out that nobody working on the films actually knows jack dick about Star Wars outside of skimming the OT once before working on the film as a mandate.

For example, they claim they don't know how big the Death Star is despite being stated to be the size of a small moon and countless references in both pre and post Disney giving exact measurements, other idiots thought the Death Star in ROTJ is the same Death Star from ANH, others thought the Emperor died in ANH, and they think Chewbacca was never given a medal despite both old and Disney shit saying Wookiees don't like awards and Disney and Marvel doing an awful promotional event and comic run a few years back for TFA dedicated solely to Chewbacca and his fucking medal and how he gave it a way to a gender-ambiguous kid. Then there's this:
View attachment 1517382

3: In case anyone ever brings up that SW is far more consistent and less retarded under Disney, just show them this:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AZtSidFfVWgK8fjyUS3pH7DjxDft9UdchdImlLIdudo/edit

And this was written by a guy who actually likes Disney shit. For those not interested in TL;DR. here's the overall gist:
View attachment 1517391
The author should've also added to the header there that this one group of 5 or so people (or more specifically Aladdin controlling space whales) was also responsible for annihilating the Empire's largest and most powerful fleets single-handedly and making every single one of the Empire's top brass including the Emperor himself look like a fool. And he even discovers the location of Kenobi with little effort in a way that makes you wonder why the Emperor and Vader didn't do the same. And to top it all off he finds the abandoned control room of the Gods and just fucks around in there all willy nilly. With their success rate, why the Hell were Han, Luke and Leia even needed? Hell Luke is inferior to Space Aladdin in every conceivable way.
View attachment 1517406
And if Disney+ rumors are to be believed, he's getting a sequel series all about finding him and returning to save the Galaxy, so who needs Luke really amirite mouseketeers?

Hell, and that's just from the Rebels section alone.


They just keep finding new ways to outdo themselves. A fucking Lego Holiday Special adaptation with Rey and the Disney gang. Also so much for Doomcock's bullshit about Disney erasing the sequel trilogy. We're getting this plus a retarded Oscar Isaac prequel story.

One of the "current year" ILM people actually said Luke was in a trench that was part of the dish?!?! The level of incompetence is even worse than I thought it was. All of this continues to clearly demonstrate why we have the results we currently have for Star Wars. Its only going to get worse.

 

[HeyYou]

In other news...
1: The writer for SW.com is a boot-licking faggot who wants Rian Johnson to peg him deeply, and Twitter just keeps getting worse.

>honors the legacy and mythology
Nothing about Disney except Luceno's books, the Anakin/Kenobi comic and a few insignificant bits from Solo and Rogue One do this.

Lol where's his trilogy then, Bryan?

 

[Mississippi Motorboater]

3: In case anyone ever brings up that SW is far more consistent and less retarded under Disney, just show them this:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AZtSidFfVWgK8fjyUS3pH7DjxDft9UdchdImlLIdudo/edit

And this was written by a guy who actually likes Disney shit. For those not interested in TL;DR. here's the overall gist:
View attachment 1517391

I feel like this compilation is in need of an update, because I know I've seen gaping hole-sized inconsistencies on this thread that aren't a part of this list. There's mountains of shit from Doctor Aphra alone that need to be included.

 

[LORD IMPERATOR]

If there's a thread ever made for the pro-ST Dullards, then I'll be uploading all the screencaps I took from Tumblr during the peak of the post-TROS meltdown. That shit was too hilarious not to archive.


I find that they're suspiciously selective about what they tolerate criticism for. If you drag the Prequels or the Expanded Universe through the shoals, they'll have no problem whatsoever, just like they didn't for the last ten years. Most of the loudest people in the ST Defense Force like HelloGreedo etc. have spent years trashing the Prequels or Special Editions, or will happily compile a "Top 10 Worst Things in the EU Before Disney Saved Star Wars" list...but the second you even remotely suggest that the new films are of poor quality, or that Disney has done more harm than good with the franchise, prepare to have the Soy SWAT Team kick down the door to deafen you with their shrill shrieks of objection.

They're the quickest to denounce "mindless hate", whilst ignoring their own history. It's double-faced hypocrisy at its finest, and it only makes sense that it's ever-present from the pro-ST aisle.

Of course they're selective. They have to get Daddy Disney to give them free merchandise and exclusive passes to events. That doesn't come unless you keep to the party line and state that all Disney has done to Star Wars is make it better than those oh-so-nasty Prequels and Expanded Universe. So they have to stick to bashing anything BUT the new Disney Star Wars stuff. That way, they get clicks from people who hate the old EU or the Prequels, while they keep Daddy Disney happy and giving them tickets and merchandise for free. Or used to, anyways, since Disney right now is in no position to hand free crap over to paid spergs on the Internet, what with them having to borrow billions just to stay afloat, and all.

I feel like this compilation is in need of an update, because I know I've seen gaping hole-sized inconsistencies on this thread that aren't a part of this list. There's mountains of shit from Doctor Aphra alone that need to be included.

Dr. Aphra.......for the love of balls, don't even get me started on that.

If this was Legends Vader dealing with Aphra, she'd be dead by now, killed by some black-ops dude while Vader sheds crocodile tears in public, eulogizing her and blaming the Rebels for her death. But since we're dealing with Nu-Star Wars, she survives earning the Dark Lord's hate and somehow escapes to live another day despite the fact that she should have died 12 issues ago.

 

[Creep3r]

I feel like this compilation is in need of an update, because I know I've seen gaping hole-sized inconsistencies on this thread that aren't a part of this list. There's mountains of shit from Doctor Aphra alone that need to be included.

Maybe even the Disney-loving authors couldn't stomach the taste of Aphra-chan and the BBQ Crew. The article seems to be open to editing, so I could add it, but quite frankly I really don't want to remember anything about Aphra. Its taking all my strength just to try and forget toilet man.

 

[LORD IMPERATOR]

Maybe even the Disney-loving authors couldn't stomach the taste of Aphra-chan and the BBQ Crew. The article seems to be open to editing, so I could add it, but quite frankly I really don't want to remember anything about Aphra. Its taking all my strength just to try and forget toilet man.

I suppose there's probably enough dissent among the ranks of Disney SW because of how much the franchise tanked under 5 years. I mean, the Expanded Universe kept the ball rolling for literal decades, and the new Disney canon, despite promises of being more coherent and easier to follow than the old Expanded Universe, is now collapsing thanks to its own dead weight and the fact that Disney can't make money anymore due to their parks closing. Bob Iger's gonna start cutting people loose, and some probably don't want to be thrown off the proverbial window.

Not only was the EU more comprehensive six years into its lifespan (if we consider 1991 the starting point, which I believe we should, considering that was the point where the novels and the comics first started to enjoy cross-media continuity and communication between both the comics and novel divisions), it also covered more interesting ground. For all the hand-wringing that people like EckhartsLadder and the rest of the Canon Cucks like to defend the new continuity with the blanket defense of "YOU JUST GOTTA GIVE THE NEW CANON TIME TO MATCH THE EU, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO HAVE KOTOR AND LEGACY RIGHT AWAY", they conveniently forget that the first foray into the origins of the Jedi and Sith was in Tales of the Jedi...in 1993.

That's right, concepts like Korriban, the Beast Riders Of Onderon, Exar Kun and Naga Sadow--that future settings like KOTOR were essentially built around--were established two fucking years into the EU's lifespan.

Meanwhile, we had to wait six entire years for the Nu-Canon to address the Jedi before the Prequels, and it's during a time with no war and no Sith. Because of course.

One has to factor in that the old Expanded Universe's first major work was the Thrawn Trilogy-a masterpiece of literature that convinced the higher-ups at Lucasfilm that expanding upon the series would be a very artistic, profitable franchise. Whereas the first major work of the new canon was Star Wars: Rebels, a show that was not only maligned by the fans upon release, but was also so weak that they had to bring in old Clone Wars and Expanded Universe characters to boost its ratings. The old EU came in with a bang, the new EU came in with a whimper and mocking laughter.

The fact that these are the same people who think Star Wars isn't about war (when quite literally it has the word WAR on the title and the main topic is the conflict between light and dark) goes to show how this new canon has always been the blind leading the blind. As if what they did to Grand Admiral Thrawn, Darth Maul, and poor Luke Skywalker wasn't enough of a sign that this new canon just wants to crap on the old to promote the new.

 

[White Devil]

None of you fuckers ever read Splinter of the Minds Eye, huh?

 

[LORD IMPERATOR]

None of you fuckers ever read Splinter of the Minds Eye, huh?

I did. In fact, I even posted previously the defense of the EU that came from that very book, written by Lucas himself.

At most, Splinter of the Mind's Eye was a decent book. My vice-principal in high school spotted me reading a Star Wars book during breaktime (Dark Lord: Rise of Darth Vader) and recommended it to me. It was funny seeing Luke and Leia rough-housing each other then for them to later turn out to be siblings, although in context, siblings do play with each other now and then. Just not as adults, but hey, the two never met as kids before.

There was a lot of ink spilled about what the hell Vader did when he fired a bolt of electricity at Luke. Some say it was something from his suit, others say it was a different Force power, until they just quit and said it was Force lightning. Regularly, you can't summon lightning when you have prosthetic hands, but the power from the Kaiburr crystal allowed Vader to summon lightning outside his armor and fire it at Luke Skywalker while the latter was possessed by the ghost of Ben Kenobi.

Basically, the book was a decent read. It was supposed to be the original sequel to the first Star Wars movie, until Lucas changed his mind and made Empire Strikes Back, then Splinter of the Mind's Eye was made into a novel.