Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[BIG DADDY]

Sorry but it’s still dumb to police language, and there’s nothing particularly stupid about anyone of any race saying they’re going to embrace their natural hair. This is the kind of microaggression shit that is why race relations will never be even close to ok, because there are innocuous things you can say at any moment that could wildly offend PoC for any reason but aren’t even close to actually being racist

 

[Angry New Ager]

"Trying to embrace my natural hair texture a little more"
Bitch, you have straight, fat white woman hair.
You don't have texture, curls, or anything else.

Is she going to start claiming she has a black great-great-great-great grandparent now?

I read, "Trying to embrace my natural hair texture a little more" as, "I'm too broke to pay professionals to make my hair look good; nobody I've relied on to do it for free is willing or able to do it on a reliable basis any more; and my lack of skill and the massive weight of my hammy arms keep me from doing it myself, so I'm forced to wear my hair unstyled."

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"Unpack Your Whorephobia"--so between this and the "Business Bitch" tattoo, I take it the announcement of her OnlyFans page is imminent?

 

[brooky]

WHAT natural hair texture?? Does she think she's Princess Merida??

Spoiler: hair

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Dorsia.Reservation]

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LOL.
Tess still trying to pretend bruce willis spawn is her friend.
That photo looks like tess took a screenshot of some article.

 

[Water-T]

Jesus - Tess is going to milk the fuck out of that frumpy strawberry dress, isn't she?

Any other woman would be embarrassed to show up at a red carpet event dressed like Strawberry Shortcake after a lifetime of gorging on cakes.

 

[melty]

What worst dressed lists? I tried to find one and instead found a bunch of media praising her for wearing the dress at the Grammys.

This strawberry dress thing won't stop being funny, because it shows how terrible a model she is. She was all over woke media months ago for this dress and nobody gave a shit until completely random people started wearing it on TikTok. Shows how irrelevant the media is as well, they can talk all they want about how stunning and amazing she is but it's clear that nobody cared at all. Normally, a celebrity (even c-list) wearing a unique item at a hot event is what would generate interest in the item, not randos wearing it months later.

 

[Smiling Honeybadger]

Is that an older post or is she STILL not over the fact that she simply looked awful in that stupid strawberry dress?!

And she really seems to build up to either her reveal of her Only Fans Account or that she herself is such a stunning and brave sexworker.

 

[DefCon Dumb]

I thought she was an experienced, "highly in tune with the industry" moddel? Pick a dress - any dress & put it on a half dozen different women. On 4 of them, it will look more or less okay, it fits, may suit their coloring & won't get them second looks for the wrong reason. On 1 woman it will look stunning. The 6th? It simply will not suit her height, build, coloring & will look cheap, no matter how well made.

That dress is a difficult look to successfully pull off. A girl needs to be fairly tall or appear so & the structure, especially the ruffles & the very distinct pattern & color of the dress means only fairly waif-like & YOUNG girls can wear it without looking like an updated Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz.

Damned right that concoction got her on Worst Dressed lists & bloody well should have. She's too old to even THINK about successfully pulling it off & it accentuates her already... large parts.

I'm sure it was trendy for a while but the type of item a young lady will buy, wear once or twice then exclaim: "What was I thinking?" Thankfully, it's cheap so not a huge mistake - just a learning experience.

Got to love her... "logic". She whines it got HER on the worst dressed list but after it became popularized by SKINNY people wearing it on TikTok, it showed that society hates fat people. That's a quantum leap in logic there, Tess. And if you & other fat people are 'winning', why do you care that it was better received worn by a bunch of skinny people?

You got on Worst Dressed Lists for that event, not INTERPOL's list of the Worlds Worst Terrorists 2020.

If you want to be large & in charge, have the good sense to pick clothing more appropriate to your age & size. A lot of women can get away with dressing 'younger' than their actual age - you can't.

 

[Parthenos]

Wtf does this even mean? Is this some new woke-shit?

It's people butthurt that a left-leaning politician's name is being mispronounced out of mockery when they've been doing that to Trump for 4/5 years and running.

 

[JambledUpWords]

I thought she was an experienced, "highly in tune with the industry" moddel? Pick a dress - any dress & put it on a half dozen different women. On 4 of them, it will look more or less okay, it fits, may suit their coloring & won't get them second looks for the wrong reason. On 1 woman it will look stunning. The 6th? It simply will not suit her height, build, coloring & will look cheap, no matter how well made.

That dress is a difficult look to successfully pull off. A girl needs to be fairly tall or appear so & the structure, especially the ruffles & the very distinct pattern & color of the dress means only fairly waif-like & YOUNG girls can wear it without looking like an updated Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz.

Damned right that concoction got her on Worst Dressed lists & bloody well should have. She's too old to even THINK about successfully pulling it off & it accentuates her already... large parts.

I'm sure it was trendy for a while but the type of item a young lady will buy, wear once or twice then exclaim: "What was I thinking?" Thankfully, it's cheap so not a huge mistake - just a learning experience.

Got to love her... "logic". She whines it got HER on the worst dressed list but after it became popularized by SKINNY people wearing it on TikTok, it showed that society hates fat people. That's a quantum leap in logic there, Tess. And if you & other fat people are 'winning', why do you care that it was better received worn by a bunch of skinny people?

You got on Worst Dressed Lists for that event, not INTERPOL's list of the Worlds Worst Terrorists 2020.

If you want to be large & in charge, have the good sense to pick clothing more appropriate to your age & size. A lot of women can get away with dressing 'younger' than their actual age - you can't.

That dress wasn’t cheap, but Tess makes it look cheap:

 

[DefCon Dumb]

My mistake - I was looking at what I now suspect were knockoffs online

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Sorry but it’s still dumb to police language, and there’s nothing particularly stupid about anyone of any race saying they’re going to embrace their natural hair. This is the kind of microaggression shit that is why race relations will never be even close to ok, because there are innocuous things you can say at any moment that could wildly offend PoC for any reason but aren’t even close to actually being racist

I agree with you.
But this is one of the things Tess REEES about all the damn day long.

"Everything's a microagression against Pee-Oh-Cees! Check your white privilege!"
It's hypocritical when she does the same things she preaches at us for.

 

[JambledUpWords]

Instagram:


Comments about strawberry dress post:

 

[Easy Peasy]

I think the strawberry dress is cute, I even think tess looked kind of nice in a parade float kind of way. But it's not the fat, the fillers, the fat or the fat that makes her so ugly. It's her herself. The preachy, judgy gaslighting, the coopting, the pandering, etc.

Girl, the fat lady sang. You're done. Fabletics and feeders are your future, so support sex workers bb, open that only fans already

 

[Cheesegirl78]

I thought the dress was cute, but only if you're 14 or younger.
It didn't suit Tess at all.

 

[SnarkySperg]

I love how she posts memes about her boundaries and how she will live the way she wants when she is literally homeless and dependant on jolene for housing her and bowie and an ex raises her son that isnt even his kid.

Thank goodness riley escaped her grasp. I cannot even imagine how embarrassing it must have been for him at school when she showed up or posted her gawdawful nudes. Hell, even fully clothed, she is a horrific nightmare to look at.

I mean, don't forget that she found out he was being bullied and waddled into his school in a fucking furry-ass coat and looking super extra to confront the kid.

I agree with you.
But this is one of the things Tess REEES about all the damn day long.

"Everything's a microagression against Pee-Oh-Cees! Check your white privilege!"
It's hypocritical when she does the same things she preaches at us for.

This. Personally, I don't give a fuck about what you say or how you say it. I don't care about cultural appropriation, or blackface, or any other number of things. But when you're preaching against it, and you do it, that does make you hypocritical, especially when you act like you're better than the people you claim are shitty. I may not think it's a big deal but if you do, I will hold you to it.

 

[Miss Misery]

I DIDN'T SAY PEOPLE ARE MAKING FUN OF ME WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?

Can you even imagine how she would have responded if the comment wasn't from a Black woman?

 

[yousoundlikeanasshole]

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Instagram:
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Comments about strawberry dress post:
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Tess's nemesis is certainly spouting off! She did a whole instagram post of Tess lying again.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Tess's nemesis is certainly spouting off! She did a whole instagram post of Tess lying again.

What is Tess winning? The last sheet cake in a cakewalk?

And why, why was she at the Grammy Awards?
Was she a seat filler?