- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
He also has an enormously elongated philtrum. I really wonder if the reason he kept the beard so long is because it distracted from his whole nose and lips.... situation.
Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT
- Thread starter chimpburgers
- Start date
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2019
- Joined
- Jul 17, 2019
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2018
that fucking hair looks like the hair you used to put on lego figures, that's how plastic it looks.
- Joined
- Apr 24, 2016
For those just tuning in, Jake's been streaming sans webcam obviously. Take a listen his voice is really high for somebody who looks like beard Jake. But its real fucking deep who looks like the leaked pic.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
The AI doesn't even recognize that fucked up thing parked on his face as a nose.
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2013
IT WILL TAKE YOU IN
IT WILL SPIT YOU OUT
BEHOLD, THE FLESH
AND THE POWER IT HOLDS
(work in progress for an ahego version im doing, thought some would appreciate this unSlenderman version)
IT WILL SPIT YOU OUT
BEHOLD, THE FLESH
AND THE POWER IT HOLDS
(work in progress for an ahego version im doing, thought some would appreciate this unSlenderman version)
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2015
I have many thoughts now that we've finally laid our eyes upon the visage of the buxom SecretGamerGrrl in her truest form.
The first is that we live in hell. We have been damned and scorned by God Almighty and we deserve this fate. Another is that, if this photo represents Jake's everyday appearance - he is shockingly a full step higher than the true bottom of the barrel troons. If our scale places This Eggheaded Retard at 0/10, Jake is a 1/10 that might even be flirting with being a 2/10 depending on your taste for morbidly obese men. This is an intriguing wrinkle in the chronicle of Jake because there's really nothing stopping him from properly engaging with the twitter troonosphere if he looks like this. Is he a fat, slovenly pig in a wig? Of course, but so are the great majority of them. He'll never pass as a Woman but in this photo he easily meets the standard to be a Man Pretending To Be A Woman On Twitter Who Participates In The Discourse.
Everyone but Jake has always understood that he has a serious issue with marketing. It's a strange situation to be in, but Jake would actually benefit from revealing himself to an fat, ugly dude in a wig. Surely, he is aware that he will be at the bottom of the hierarchy of trans people, but at least he will be able to actually cement his existence in hierarchy. Part of the reason why his accusations towards Zoe were so ineffective was because his oppression points weren't fully locked in. Everyone knew his claimed to be a transwoman, but there was something ethereal to his claim as it felt like another example of the lunacy he spews about nazis knocking down his door.
At this point, the only thing stopping Jake from reaching his zenith as Another Ugly Troon is that he knows posting pictures of his current look will confirm that he was once the bearded man that he always denied being. It's like when a child pretends to be sick so they can skip school but then sees their friends playing outside in evening and can't join them because they claimed to have a flu earlier. In this case, there's nothing but upside to admitting that Violet Ocean is SecretGamerGrrl is Jake Alley - except for the part where Jake has to admit that he has lied to everyone for years. Confessing would probably be his biggest accomplishment in many years and allow his life to move forward much more smoothly.
The first is that we live in hell. We have been damned and scorned by God Almighty and we deserve this fate. Another is that, if this photo represents Jake's everyday appearance - he is shockingly a full step higher than the true bottom of the barrel troons. If our scale places This Eggheaded Retard at 0/10, Jake is a 1/10 that might even be flirting with being a 2/10 depending on your taste for morbidly obese men. This is an intriguing wrinkle in the chronicle of Jake because there's really nothing stopping him from properly engaging with the twitter troonosphere if he looks like this. Is he a fat, slovenly pig in a wig? Of course, but so are the great majority of them. He'll never pass as a Woman but in this photo he easily meets the standard to be a Man Pretending To Be A Woman On Twitter Who Participates In The Discourse.
Everyone but Jake has always understood that he has a serious issue with marketing. It's a strange situation to be in, but Jake would actually benefit from revealing himself to an fat, ugly dude in a wig. Surely, he is aware that he will be at the bottom of the hierarchy of trans people, but at least he will be able to actually cement his existence in hierarchy. Part of the reason why his accusations towards Zoe were so ineffective was because his oppression points weren't fully locked in. Everyone knew his claimed to be a transwoman, but there was something ethereal to his claim as it felt like another example of the lunacy he spews about nazis knocking down his door.
At this point, the only thing stopping Jake from reaching his zenith as Another Ugly Troon is that he knows posting pictures of his current look will confirm that he was once the bearded man that he always denied being. It's like when a child pretends to be sick so they can skip school but then sees their friends playing outside in evening and can't join them because they claimed to have a flu earlier. In this case, there's nothing but upside to admitting that Violet Ocean is SecretGamerGrrl is Jake Alley - except for the part where Jake has to admit that he has lied to everyone for years. Confessing would probably be his biggest accomplishment in many years and allow his life to move forward much more smoothly.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2014
Like, if you told me that was CwCs older brother, I'd believe you.
- Joined
- Aug 9, 2019
It looks like his "transition goal" is that idiot who claimed that Twitter gave them PTSD. And he's somehow failing to live up to that.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2016
Holden, you have a special gift for nightmare fuel.
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2017
HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Now that's a hideous landwhale! Jake Alley has turned himself into a shittier Renfamous! I have no words on how fucked that is. Jake's now in a corner and he cannot deny it.
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2013
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
You are, perhaps, not the first to note a certain commonality.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
But everyone who has ever willingly met him already knows he's lying about that. They know those pictures aren't just some collection of random fat guys, but that they're actually him.
So far as I remember, nobody even previously noticed how weird and deformed his nostrils are, but when you look for points of similarity between the faces that honker just suddenly jumps right out at you and you wonder what the fuck is with those nostrils? I've never even seen that before.
*finger guns* Now that's where you're wrong kiddo.
Seriously, just watch him. He either completely melts down or refuses to admit it or both.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2016
The nose needs to be more inverted like the initial anime filter.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
What would he look like with a coolie hat
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2016
The narcissistic injury is part of it, certainly. I also wonder if Jake's mom has told him that her condition for continuing to fund his lifestyle is keeping this sort of thing out of the public eye. If so, something like this could really make it harder for him to keep mooching.
Or maybe he just knows he'll get cancelled for the coolie hat.
- Joined
- Apr 24, 2016
Who knows, maybe he'll finally own it and start posting more selfies.
In the mean time, lets get William Shatner to stop bullying Wu again and get back on the Jake Train.
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2015
Wow. The Cat Lady glasses really accentuate that weird ass nose. There’s no beard to pull your eyes away from it. He’s morbidly obese and has a really cheap plastic-looking wig.