Diseased Neo-Pagans / Witches on the Internet / Witchblr - SMT IRL, but with fatties

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.
If you want good things to happen, just work hard.
Is it just me or is everyone on Tumblr mentally ill?
How do you attack someone psychically?
I'm sure Apollo appreciates the mass produced plastic bird statue and fake flowers you gave him.
Imagine you had a little niece or nephew, and they wanted a new bike. So you say "OK, if you clean the garage I'll give you money and you can buy a bike." and instead they take their allowance money and make a donation in your name to a charity you like in the hopes it'll make you buy them a bike. That's the equivalent of what these "witches" are doing.
 
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You'll never experience the "big d"
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They really spent their time writing this.
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I really like using cheese pizza for my sex magick if you know what I mean.
 
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You'll never experience the "big d"
Stuff like this only exemplifies how bad things are today. Her fantasy interactions are built on sitcom scripts and I can bet cash that her expectation of IRL interactions runs off the same script. I hate sitcom brains so much.

We both know exactly why witch-hunting is still so popular in Africa
Good point, but be honest: if you had to leave your dilapidated stolen house every morning for work and you had this woman as your neighbor you'd be a "witch hunter" too:
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"Get your pygmy bones off my driveway, Umbunta! Quit playin! I know you heard me, don't chant over me! I told you to stop having your rape-death rituals on my property. I'm sick of the chicken blood and human flesh getting all over my tires. No, you retard, stabbing your doll won't make me go away any faster. Aiight, know what? Forget it. Hey Baako, go fetch me the machete, the spare tire and some gasoline."

Joking aside, there's two main problems with witch hunts in [disenfranchised] countries:
1) the idea that practicing witchcraft (and what that means in that culture's context) is deserving of death and there's no way to tell if someone is/is not doing it,
2) everyone who complains about it, and especially those who bitch about "muh Salem", forget that "witchcraft" is more than quirky herbalism in these countries. It can involve everything from massive amounts of drugs to the theft and killing of cattle and even people.

"Witches", cults and magic crap goes hand-in-hand outside of Witchblr's little world of cottages and sitcom gods. Not advocating for witch hunts, mind you, but that there's always more of a reason than "evil White Christian Gargamels showed the poor negro Smurf villagers a Bible and now they're beating their women to death! Remember muh Salem!"
Also the idea of criminals covering their crime by preemptively defending their actions with "but witch"
 
Stuff like this only exemplifies how bad things are today. Her fantasy interactions are built on sitcom scripts and I can bet cash that her expectation of IRL interactions runs off the same script. I hate sitcom brains so much.


Good point, but be honest: if you had to leave your dilapidated stolen house every morning for work and you had this woman as your neighbor you'd be a "witch hunter" too:
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"Get your pygmy bones off my driveway, Umbunta! Quit playin! I know you heard me, don't chant over me! I told you to stop having your rape-death rituals on my property. I'm sick of the chicken blood and human flesh getting all over my tires. No, you retard, stabbing your doll won't make me go away any faster. Aiight, know what? Forget it. Hey Baako, go fetch me the machete, the spare tire and some gasoline."

Joking aside, there's two main problems with witch hunts in [disenfranchised] countries:
1) the idea that practicing witchcraft (and what that means in that culture's context) is deserving of death and there's no way to tell if someone is/is not doing it,
2) everyone who complains about it, and especially those who bitch about "muh Salem", forget that "witchcraft" is more than quirky herbalism in these countries. It can involve everything from massive amounts of drugs to the theft and killing of cattle and even people.

"Witches", cults and magic crap goes hand-in-hand outside of Witchblr's little world of cottages and sitcom gods. Not advocating for witch hunts, mind you, but that there's always more of a reason than "evil White Christian Gargamels showed the poor negro Smurf villagers a Bible and now they're beating their women to death! Remember muh Salem!"
Also the idea of criminals covering their crime by preemptively defending their actions with "but witch"
I`m sure muslim influence has some bearing of it too but a lot of that stuff with africans and witches is ancient. Even when they have Yoruba that practices spiritism and divination they have their own turf wars between witches. Even witches hate other witches.

That stuff crosses over into santeria here in latin america, the regular santeros kill goats , catsand chickens (animal rescuers really fucking hate santeros adopting black cats to kill them) and do all sorts of invocation rituals and their cults are set up as a pyramid scam, but even regular santeros hate Paleros which are santeros who practice "palo mayombe" which is a form of necromancy and all rituals tend to be towards harmful ends and they use death people and hard drugs, presumably they are the ones narcos use for power rituals using human sacrifice and killing endangered animals. One panther from a zoo got a leg chooped off for a santeria ritual, a jaguar also was decapitated and his head found near an altar on a street, bodies on one of the "poor people graveyards" get dugged up en masse and it became an undergroun bussiness to sell their bones so this is not just urban myths .

People who are not santeros have a lot of reasons to hate santeros and witchraft other than them being different, is more about them breaking the law constantly and doing incredibly disturbing shit, being involved with drugs, intimidation rackets, animal abuse, desecration, etc. Chubby girls who only do witchy crocheting are cooky and harmless in comparison but they shoulnd't just pretend like that is what all the weird witch cults are doing. I also think of Adolfo de Jesús Constanzo when clueless first worlders think so many latin americans hate brujeria because we are all ignorant meanie bigots.
 
I'm surprised nobody's posted this yet.

All these girls got their "knowledge" from Supernatural and Percy Jackson and it's mind boggling. In my edgy teen spiritualist phase I looked into "magic" and absolutely none of this was remotely what I found.

I did find a nice guided meditation thing that was pretty cool.
 

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Why would Athena, goddess of wisdom ask that? Wouldn't she already know the answer?
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I never hear about Jews forgetting about Hannukah or Christians forgetting Christmas, this just proves that witches aren't really that devoted.
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I'm pretty sure he is not the god of memes.
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It's okay to be curse positive because your spells don't fucking work.
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Why are these people's families always being cursed?!
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So you can practice magic but you can't communicate with your sibling?
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Go to a dermatologist!
 
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She probably curses someone because they didn't use their bunself pronouns or something.
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How is someone who doesn't have mental and emotional scars so bad it gave them PTSD have the "most bland and easygoing life"?! You know most people aren't mentally ill right?
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"Let your hands roam their body freely, and take your time sizing up your prey."
Sounds like sexual harassment to me.
 
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The designs are kinda creative and the art isn’t bad, even if half of these are made up identities. Kiwi Farms should do a set but make them actually look like the people who identify as these, especially the trans-identified males with a wig and beard and the classic non-binary deathfat.
 
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What did your ex do to deserve this?!
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Just go outside.
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Looks like a troon.
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Faggot.
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Why do these people think they have this godlike powers?!
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"Until you can give them freewill"
Mixing your period blood with someone's hair doesn't take away their freewill. Get off Tumblr.
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I'm fucking all the bitches.
I'm fucking all the bitches.
I'm fucking all the bitches.
I'm fucking all the bitches.
I'm fucking all the bitches.
 
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Mixing period blood with salt in a jar will not help with your grief. Go to therapy.
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Imagine hooking up with a girl on tinder, unhooking her bra and some fucking rose quartz falls out. After you ask why she has a rock stuffed in her underwear, she says "I'm letting this crystal absorb my magickal sweat and then will offer it Aphrodite." My question is, would you still fuck her or nah?
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Aren't you supposed to fear a deity? They can destroy you with a snap of their finger.
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Don't worry, we like you. Idiots are good for laughing at.
 
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This is something that has been bugging me for a while, so while I appreciate that all the large images are being spoilered, could you guys write some kind of description or commentary or joke in the spoilers so I'm not just looking at "SPOILER" and then a comment underneath it.

Hiya.

The commentary can also go here to give us a reason to stick around in this box.

You know, just to entice the reader a bit more.
 
This is something that has been bugging me for a while, so while I appreciate that all the large images are being spoilered, could you guys write some kind of description or commentary or joke in the spoilers so I'm not just looking at "SPOILER" and then a comment underneath it.

Hiya.

The commentary can also go here to give us a reason to stick around in this box.

You know, just to entice the reader a bit more.
I will do this, thanks for telling me.
 
Screenshot_20200824-131503.png Why do these people care so much about this? A "hex" for them is just mixing period blood and salt in a jar. It's really not that important.
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Screenshot_20200824-134123.png Lol at this fatty having to resort to magick to loose weight.
Screenshot_20200824-134526.png The one on her left knee looks like a chicken foot.
Screenshot_20200824-135050.png Anyone here want to bet on how soon it will be lasered off?
 
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