Bigot Brigade Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

Imagine probating someone for posting the most accurate summary to date.

If you read the thread, every post after it is basically the equivalent of people sticking fingers in their ears and saying, "No, you're wrong!". Or the typical "lol didn't read" post, even though you know they read it.
 

This response was interesting:

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I, for one, welcome Bread n' Roses to the ranks of unhinged offsite stalkers. Or at least wonder how a ResetERA esque spinoff of the most insufferable people were elevated to the status of boogeymen when SA's current role seems to be soothing and validating exactly those people.
 

That post is so fuckin' gold I'm just going to copypaste it. "Churnalist" might be my new favorite term for Vice writers.

So lemme see if I have it straight:

- Last year FYAD had a thread about AGP, which is trans people who're doing it because they get off on having a vagina, rather than having "legit" gender dysphoria [?] and it's all some nebulous and possibly nonsense fringe area of psychology.
- This pissed off the trans people in TGRS, who went on a campaign to get Something Done About It.
- Koalas March, who apparently has a bank of switches that allow her to flick to whatever disadvantaged demographic she feels might help her win arguments and gain free laptops, became their defacto champion. Also CascadeBeta [who had a Barney lookin' avatar but you can't call it a Barney] was hella mad. Also uh Ash Crimson. Basically anyone with one of those Illuminati avatars.
- TGRS people yell at FYAD people. FYAD people are middle-aged men with high school girl mentalities, so a lotta pseudo-ironic chillaxery ensues, which allows the TGRS people to go SEE THEY REALLY ARE EVIL BIGOTS. FYAD does much parading of token minorities in a faintly distasteful way. TGRS people out a bunch of innocent bystanders for no reason.
- Dread Lowtax wakes up from his ambien coma, and decides to do the thing that will entail the least work, which is close FYAD.
- Some third rate churnalist interviews Lowtax, he's all "oh ya they're totally nazis fer sure, also the good ones left for twitter". This is despite FYAD basically being a simple algorithm where if something is funny you go "oh yeah that's real fyad" and if it's not they go "it's not real fyad" therefore FYAD can never suck, only be sucked.
- Jack Daniels is apparently a person, and cycles between banned and unbanned every 28 days, enraging a different 50% of the forum with each transition.
- Koalas March loses control of her angry mob, and ends up losing her precious Internet power in the interim. This is because she stepped down...or IS IT dun dun dun.
- Fluffdaddy becomes the new precious Internet power, but he is a toe-curlingly embarassing turbodork who obviously imagines himself talking like Marcellus Wallace, therefore he upsets most of the trans people, who boost for Bread and Roses and then immediately start harassing and backbiting each other.
- PPJ turns out to be a double-secret agent running some kind of elaborate sting operation on Discords to try to trap EVIL NAZIS, and gives Koalas March evidence of NAZI PLOTS AGAINST HER which largely consist of a few bored dorks in a Discord going "ugh fuck Koalas March" also the Goon Discord Network has some kind of robot spy network on it that tracks everyone for...reasons.
- Pick is somehow involved. Saying FYAD three times in a mirror summons pog boyfriend.
- Lowtax finally gets busted for what everyone on IRC or Kiwi Farms has known for years, mass uprisings and self-bannings and a zillion variations on Yikes.
- Lowtax goes all WHYYYY DID AN ANGRY GOD DRIVE MY HAND INTO THAT BAD WOMAN'S FACE, 'TWAS THE SA MADE ME DO IT, I MUST RID MYSELF OF THESE AWFUL INTERNET HATE MOB PEOPLEoh btw they financed my cushy ass lifestyle of sitting in a gargantuan McMansion guzzling pain pills and mail ordering 500% markup confectionaries but whatevs how dare they.
- Jeffrey of Yospos is gonna FIX THINGS UP, YOU GUYS. Despite being such a meek doof that he worked for Lowtax for free for aaaaages and also Lowtax being the human embodiment of inertia.
- LITERALLY A BIRD got so upset by the mean .gif lady's weird ass coup that she now needs XANAX to type a tearful goodbye post, then another one, then one final one, then another five or six in the days to come, and rather than going "sheesh" everyone is going "omg miss u bae" although to be fair she apparently helped Logan get away from Lowtax so that's nice.
- Lowtax woke up from his coma, hit a manic phase, reopened FYAD.
- Guerilla cadres left behind by B&R start activating, minor bawww'ing.
- Lowtax tries to hang with the FYAD people, gets told to fuck off, closes the forum.
- Jeffrey of YOSPOS eventually reopens it and because he is a man of action now has a floating postal Brigadoon, that appears totally at random and consists largely of Jeffrey posting essays of corporate speak, because he's caught the same verbal diarrhoea that afflicted FAU.
- But the gist is there WAS ACTUALLY a clique of posters and moderators trying to stage a laughable coup, but don't ask who it was or why, yes they're still here, no we're not doing anything about it, SA's culture of secrecy has worked very well in the past. PPJ? Lowtax? Radium? Shmorky? Loosechanj? Aatrek? Fire? Admin? Al? Jre? PPJ's weird Nazi spy ring? Never heard of 'em, mate.
- One person goes "hey, it's fairly obvious that Koalas March and Lightning Knight were behind it, we've all ready the Kiwifarms mod forum leak" except also you've got to do a lot of performative hand wringing about how KF are evil Nazis who dox and harass and the fact that they're literally the only way to find out what the fuck is going on is neither here nor there.
- Koalas March then self destructs.
- Which has made LITERALLY A BIRD self destruct.
- And Jeffrey continues to skulk around opening and closing the thread for 30 seconds every second Tuesday because he wants to keep a lid on things and protect his investment even though he is very, very obviously never getting ownership of SA.


I have that about right?
Also, that dumpster fire of a PYF thread just continues to burn. Someone came in to denounce LITERALLY A BIRD as a liar, saying that Koalas March did in fact apologize to her and there are receipts, you evil lying bitch.

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Literally a Liar. Damn, you owned that piece of shit, TheArchimage. Take all my 5s. Screenshots of Discord PMs attached:

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Unfortunately for TheArchimage, it would appear that not all goons are completely incapable of scrutinizing evidence and comparing timestamps to timing of events. LITERALLY A BIRD immediately hits back, pointing out that KM's apology was sent before news of the attempted coup ever surfaced -- it was in relation to that one E/N shitstorm about a moderator covering for pedophiles and domestic abusers. I doctored out the quote for readability; refer here for the original post. The whole page is fucking gold because every goon gets in a slapfight over whether or not it was an apology and what it was an apology for, without reading anything or being at all aware of any context.

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Bird even points to an old post alleging that Koala March had covered for ShadowCatboy, a particularly notorious sexual predator who was eventually permabanned for relentlessly preying on underage boys:

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After which, TheArchimage quietly withdrew. Shame, he was so enthusiastic about that damning evidence he had uncovered about Bird, too. You just know he was screaming "MORE LIKE LITERALLY A BITCH" at the screen as he hit post on that first salvo.
 
koala mooch should be permaed imo

Anyone that voiced support for KM, CascadeBeta, and fellow travelers back in dec/jan should never live it down and be constantly reminded of such. Current admins are playing games to keep the user base around for the future revenue stream. Makes sense. Those with half a brain knew what was going down at the time and don't need overwrought mea culpas
 
Goons are incredibly thirsty for even remotely attractive internet women, and generally bend over backwards for them if they're thought to be single.

This protection does not extend to a woman if they are known to be not left-wing. In that situation they get periodic challenges about their gender.
 
If only someone had warned them that Koala's mooch was a shit-stirring grifting liar out only for herself regardless of who she needs to trample or exploit to get it done, maybe this could have been avoided.

This user has been banned for acknowledging Kiwifarms exists
 
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And of course, the sensible and rational person who actually understands how fucked up modern SA has become winds up being silenced for wrongthink. :Edit: Honest question? What the fuck is optimistic about this post?
You described a goon as sensible and rational, I would guess
 
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