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🐷 Ethan Oliver Ralph / TheRalphRetort / Rad Roberts / Jcaesar187 / Rage Pig / "Killstream" / "Tequila Sunrise" - 5'1'' fat alcoholic, owner of a gunt, convicted felon and revenge pornographer, property of the ugly failed tranny pornstar Lucas Roberts. Has quadruple titties.
I have to do this a whole fucking hour early? YOU TRIPLE GUT MOTHERFUCKER
collard greens
I took a nap earlier so I could stay awake for this since I haven't been sleeping well since doing the reeeeeecaps
I have periods of insomnia so it's probably just a coincidence
I have stuff to take for it, I just keep forgetting I have it
Plus I get more stuff done when I sleep every two days
Anyway, how are you guys doing? I'm a little tired but otherwise fine. My doctor says my organs & labs are all normal, so no perforated bowel or twisted up intestines.
My stomach's still fucky but at least I won't Total Biscuit. . .for now.
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doot doo doo doo doo thanks @Sam Losco the coffin dance meme music is my fucking jam
HELL YEAH CRAB RAVE, my night is officially better
"I'll be right back." Wait, Sam or Ralph?
[Bojack intro] Must be Ralph, then.
[guitar intro] Yeah, it's Ralph.
This has been the BOLDYSPICY pre-debate pre-stream pre-show
Ladies & gentlemen welcome to DLIVE FUCKING SUCKS I am your host ENTROPY IS BEING DDOS'D TOO OH MY GOD
Ralph got a three-day DLive ban because Frank Hassle said the nigger word & IT'S BULLSHIT
Old man rock-em sock-em robots! HELL YEAH BIBBLE
Bibble is best hype-man, but Ralph is upset
"I thought the debate would have started by now." They're emulating the NUMBER ONE STREAM ON THE INTERNET
Ralph thinks Entropy is being DDoS'd just to get back at him, he'd bet his left nut on it
Normally I'd say Ralph is being paranoid & just sucks at tech, but who fucking knows anymore
Ralph is not bald
Ralph fails at tech
Okay the debate is starting
No handshakes because coof
Spectators have to shut the fuck up
Ralph gives the superchat link so you can still throw pennies at him
FIRST TOPIC: THE SUPREME COURT & NOTORIOUS ACB
Biden is going to be annihilated
"OUTLAW KILLSTREAM LET'S GOOOO! PIRATE RADIO!"
Ralph has a volume extention! & immediately fucks it up
Chris Wallace is getting in a slapfight with Trump
I'm with Ralph for once, Trump is really well-prepared for this.
"I guess I'm debating you instead." --Trump to Wallace
The audio continues to fuck up
Predictably, the debate is three crusty old white geriatrics yelling over each other
Chat is joking about Ralph flagging shit(?)
Ralph tells chat to kill themselves, die slow, & burn in Hell
Also fuck your mother
THEN die slow
NEXT TOPIC: CORONA-CHAN
Biden Shitting His Pants Watch
Trump is getting very sassy with Biden & straight-up insults him
"If you're listening to this stream, upvote it. Because faggots are flagging [mumble]"
Ralph is seething.
"HIT THAT FUCKING LIKE BUTTON, CAN'T ABORT THE RETORT"
Ralph is basically doing this for free, so superchat generously
Trump pays millions in taxes. X to doubt
He'll show his tax returns eventually
"Why would you want to pay taxes? No one wants to pay taxes." True, Ralph, but how else would leeches like you survive? Who would pay for the ER bills you skip out on?
Ralph would have done it for free. Hypothetically. Pls gib.
Bibble giving the hot political takes
Ralph is having Jay Dwyer flashbacks? Why, because two delusional men are having a slapfight while you watch?
Ralph is back to hooting & hollering
CHRIS WALLACE IS GONNA HOLLER OVER BIDEN & TRUMP ALL FUCKING DAY
Chris Wallace hates Trump, I agree
"This would be like Josh Moon moderating a debate between me & Ashton Parks from Canada"
More hooting, more hollering, more dolphin laugh
"WE'RE ON YOUTUBE! WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, BAN ME? FUCK YOU SUSAN YOU BITCH! WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, BAN ME AGAIN?"
Gator: "& they're bragging about it!" Where? Here? All ten of us total that are actively posting? We're not doing shit, besides archival & commentary, anyway. As Null said, Ralph has a lot of bad blood with a lot of people. We're a fraction of a fraction of the people keeping tabs on Ralph. Even if we were doing anything untoward, which is against forum rules & grounds for bann, 20-odd Kiwis aren't going to get Ralph deplatformed. Ralph is going to get Ralph deplatformed. Nobody here told him to not review a video with the nigger word in it before playing it on a trigger-happy shady Chinese streaming platform. That was all Ralph.
"Hit like on the stream, they wanna abort!"
"You won't be here in 2035, Joe." Neither will you, Ralph.
Ding dong, someone's here.
"Hit like on the stream" Count: 27 garillion
Is the debate done? I think we're done. What a fucking waste of time. (As most presidential debates are, but still.)
Panel thirsting over Melania Trump. Well, Ralph & Bibble are. Gator is gone, probably. Ralph is starting to slur a bit.
"I'm not a degenerate gambler, I'm a degenerate drug addict." --Ethan Ralph 2020
The guest here is "Danny." Which tells me nothing.
He's Danny. . .Paulachuck? Idk
Ding dong, someone else is here
Oh, it's Ryan Long
Ralph got tempbanned from DLive. Did he mention he got tempbanned from DLive?
Gator is back
Apparently "people who don't like [Ralph] at DLive" want him shut down
I mean it's just the losers that hate Ralph that are flagging him
Everybody wants Ralph deplatformed. I can't speak for everyone, but I don't want you deplatformed. I want you to keep Donga-ing on streams until I get bored & move on, but hopefully we'll get a Pillstream first.
Ralph says he has a fetish, but gets cut off by the unfunny dude who says "for guys." This devolves into everyone giggling over low-effort gay jokes
Ralph forgot what he was going to say
Ralph keeps dropping "faggot" & Bibble says Ralph is going to get his channel banned. Does that mean he's also restreaming on DLive through Bibble's Saturday Sunset account?
Oh, Danny's a "comedian." Was he on before? I vaguely remember an unfunny edgey boi comedian but I can't remember if that was him.
Danny is Canadian. Talking about Canadian accents. Canadians think Warski sounds like a second-generation immigrant.
Talking about their thoughts on the debate
Warski the second-generation immigrant is here
Okay, apparently Ryan Long is the Canadian, I can't tell.
Warski: "Who won?" Ryan/Danny: "America."
Ryan & Danny sound the fucking same, I can't tell who's talking
Danny & Ryan consider committing voting fraud
Ralph is reminiscing about NYC bars & getting shitfaced for days at a time & gorging on New York deli fare
Everyone making fat/drunk Ralph jokes
The debate was more Trump vs. Wallace then Trump vs. Biden. Agree.
Ralph says "LARPers" instead of moderators because he's "reading something else." Whatcha readin', Ralph?
Talking about Boogie
Dingo snuck on
Ralph admits he's drunk
"Is Frank Hassle more your boy than Boogie?" Panel unanimously votes yes. Ralph says yes five seconds after everybody stops talking. He's really starting to get fucked up.
Frank has already fled to another city & therefore he will be experiencing no legal repercussions? I don't think that's how that works.
Footage of Boogie actually firing into the air. Good job pointing the gun in the direction of your neighbors' houses Boogie you fat 'tard
Ralph believed this was real from the start, "Mundane Matt was talking some bullshit"
DLive Bann Mention Count: 4(?)
Everybody's been doxed
Everybody's been SWATted
Okay it was two cops
Two Canadian cops
"You need your own Hands Up, Don't Shoot movement." Ralph: "WE DID IT'S CALLED GAMERGATE"
A woman calls in & Ralph flirtily says "hello~"
It's Ashton Birdie, whoever that is.
She's been doxed too
Ryan & Danny will probably be doxed
She starts to say something about not watching the video & Ralph keeps shouting over her telling her to stop talking. ???
She says "like" every two words, it's unlistenable
There's a video of a naked girl dancing on top of, pissing on, & fingering herself on a car. People thought it was Ashton.
There's controversy about this, but I don't know what the fucking controversy is
Ralph asks her straight-up "how big are your tits." Fucking charming.
Brittany Venti (attention whore, stinky) called Danny a pedo after he made an obvious Cuties joke
Are Vtubers loli? Andy clarifies. (No)
If you wanna rape kids, why would you be on the Killstream (???)
Ashton says Andy looks like Nick Kroll, "the ugly guy." She doesn't understand why Andy is affronted. What a dumb bitch, holy shit.
Dingo is still fucking here & has been sitting in silence the entire time.
Dingo is reading superchats for Ralph now, what the fuck
Ashton makes a self-deprecating joke & Ralph jumps to her defense. "Ashton, don't be mean to yourself, sweetheart, tell 'em to suck your clit!" This is the nicest Ralph has ever been to a woman on air. Holy shit.
"No man with balls in his sack would let [Ashton being victimized by Baked Alaska] happen." Holy shit, Ralph, I'm actually kind of impressed.
Then he ruins it by threatening to expose Ashton as a liar for being duplicitous (trying not to shit on Baked on stream while shitting on him off-stream).
Ralph fucking hates Baked.
Ralph understands that Ashton doesn't want to talk about Baked & kinda-sorta apologies.
RALPH GOT SWATTED? DID YOU KNOW RALPH GOT SWATTED? You mean the wellness check?
Dunking on Ashton for being a crazy bitch & to her credit she rolls with the punches.
Ralph still has a 901 area code from Memphis 10
Ralph slips up & said he was "hooking up" with Ashton before the show. He meant calling her up to come on the show but it was a great Freudian slip.
Pinky Culture is here. He & Dingo have been restreaming for Ralph, awww.
Dingo is reading more superchats. Dingo is so cucked he is grifting for his master for free.
Ralph is bringing in Ninjaghinis tonight. Expect more smuggery on how he's making money & you can't abort
Black Pigeon Speaks you're on the Killstream
DLive Bann Mention Count: 5(?)
Warski's gonna go eat & dissect the Boogie/Jarbo stream on his show
There's a chance Ralph can get his DLive ban lifted Thursday.
DLive Bann Mention Count: 6(?)
DLive Bann Mention Count: 7(?)
Ralph doesn't give a fuck about whether "DLive will do the right thing."
DLive Bann Mention Count: 8(?)
"People think life of a stand-up comedian is glamorous." Says fucking who? Literally no one thinks this but Ralph.
Danny & Ryan, promote your shit
Ralph is very drunk.
"Do we have callers? I dunno."
Hurry up & wrap up your show, I am a v sleepy girl
DLive Bann Mention Count: 9(?)
CAN'T ABORT
Gator is fucking fired up
THEY WERE FLAGGING THE STREAM
THEY WERE BOTTING
THEY DDOS'D ENTROPY
THEY WERE IN CHAT
YOU HAVE NO MORAL GROUND TO STAND ON
YOUR GAY MESSAGE BOARD GETS WHATEVER IT DESERVES (??? I think)
Gator, Gator, Gator.
WE
DIDN'T
DO
SHIT
"Ashton, tell 'em." "Tell 'em what?"
Ashton doesn't know if people will be into her content. Ralph says he wants to be into her titties.
RALPH YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND & A BABY ON THE WAY YOU DISGUSTING PIG.
Ralph asks her about her cup size.
Ralph apologizes for being a "lecherous old man."
Ralph's daddy used to tell li'l Ralph that any tiddy bigger than a handful isn't worth it, which explains a lot about Ralph.
"Small titties are more sensitive. Mmm." Please get the crowbar @Captain Manning, my vagina has sealed itself shut again.
BRING ON RANDBOT, WE'RE ON YOUTUBE
Except for Dingo
MUTE IT DINGO
"Rand is completely welcome on the Killstream when we're not on that piece of shit site." You're gonna get booted if you keep talking shit about your Chinese lemon emperors.
[Ralph continues to shit on DLive with weird pissing in tent metaphors]
Rand is talking about the debate
Trump brought back sportsball
Sportsball talk
Ralph has forgotten Dingo was here like three times.
Who the fuck is Ryan Long again? The only person I can think of when I hear that name is the porn wikileaks guy (Donny Long?) that got wrapped up in some of Vordrak’s shit. Why the fuck does he think people want Canadians on a show re. the US Presidential Debates?
Like it or not, content creators/streamers are one hundred percent responsible for the pre-recorded material they rebroadcast. It's been that way for as long as I can remember, and this is precisely why you do show research. Keemstar edited his version of the Boogie video.
And this even assumes that Ralph had no idea what was on that video, and the reason he gave for eating a DLive ban isn't some bullshit. I'm sure plenty of people here and elsewhere have their doubts on that one.
I think Godwinson recognises that Dingo is a whore and a voltaile moron that can be flipped against the gunt if you give him a platform and your nice enough to him.
When he talked to the dildo norwiegan the first thing he mentioned is: You better be nice to me cause i have heard you talking shit before.
I hate politcal grifting so much. Riling people up and dividing people for fatter profits.
Say what you want about Vaush or destiny but both of them believe in what they are saying.
DesTiny is a neoliberal and Vaush is comunist
Now that your getting in to peoples good graces agains.
Could you stop sloberin on nicks knob for 2 seconds?
Yeah, political grifting is just a way for people who aren't funny, smart or creative enough to maintain an entertainment career on talent and effort alone, to keep pulling in those low-effort donation dollars. I think the only good to come out of it is when people realize them for the bullshit-slinging scammers they are, and apply that lesson further and farther afield.
I also doubt Vaush believes in the cause he represents. He started from jump misrepresenting his background, pretending to be working class irish, when he's in fact from a well-off, connected family; and he also openly, admittedly lies, obsfucates and misrepresents his "debate" opponents in efforts to boost his paypig donations.
I could see him being dumb enough to have fallen for his own propoganda maybe, but I would figure he'd be out trying to lead in the streets if he was an actual true-believer
I don't know about that, when black people dance they actually have rhythm.
Sidenote= does anyone have that clip where Ralph is running in Miami and the most he can do is waddle/shuffle his feet? I desperately need that shit for posterity.
This is getting surreal. I can't wait to see if Dlive will let him back on with his twitter sperging. Should we check the Richmond VA arson records? Perhaps gunty is a serial arsonist with how he loves to burn bridges?
What children? At no point in that 20 second clip did Destiny ever say anything about children. What the hell is he even talking about?
Typical confused, wet brained gibberish
Like it or not, content creators/streamers are one hundred percent responsible for the pre-recorded material they rebroadcast. It's been that way for as long as I can remember, and this is precisely why you do show research. Keemstar edited his version of the Boogie video.
And this even assumes that Ralph had no idea what was on that video, and the reason he gave for eating a DLive ban isn't some bullshit. I'm sure plenty of people here and elsewhere have their doubts on that one.
Butttttttt.... Dlive is a private company
And they can do whatever they want!!!1 reee
No, the ban isn't bullshit. If Ralph wasn't a lazy nigger and actually watched the video before posting it or simply saying "I disavow the use of that word" after hearing it, he'd be fine.
Cuck more to your lemon overlords, gunty, do you want 4 nijjatanks running over you and your shitty whisky?
In all honesty though, I think Dlive is getting sick of the Gunt and his autism. Dingo said the word nigger on Matt's stream and YouTube didn't boulder rape Jarbo. Dlive is officially more cucked than YouTube? Or rather, they want the gunt gone. Should just permaban him.
is this really what weve come to now? defending ralphs right to be an even lazier pos who cant even watch through short clips before showing them? really? i mean what if boogie snuck in cp and ralph was dumb enough to show it is he just exempt? is he grandfathered in the lazy fat faggot clause?
The issue with many lolbertarian responses is there is often a huge divide between the way somebody wishes the world was, and the way the world actually is (and oftentimes has been for a long time).
This isn't some radical new policy on DLive's part. People got yeeted for this shit in the days before Google bought YouTube. So none of what happened yesterday is "bullshit" according to the long established rules of the game. Gunt fucked up. Plain and simple.
Put more succinctly: Wish in one hand, and shit in the other. See which one fills up first.
I don't know about that, when black people dance they actually have rhythm.
Sidenote= does anyone have that clip where Ralph is running in Miami and the most he can do is waddle/shuffle his feet? I desperately need that shit for posterity.
He's a retarded, thin skinned, self destructive addict who thinks he's a king. You don't need to be political to appreciate his contributions to the field of fat faggotry
It's hard to tell considering every single group equally hates The Gunt. Nazis, Communists, Conservatives, Liberals, Lolbergs, Socialists, Fascists, just about every political ideaology wants to gas Ralph. Truly a uniter of the people.
The issue with many lolbertarian responses is there is often a huge divide between the way somebody wishes the world was, and the way the world actually is (and oftentimes has been for a long time).
This isn't some radical new policy on DLive's part. People got yeeted for this shit in the days before Google bought YouTube. So none of what happened yesterday is "bullshit" according to the long established rules of the game. Gunt fucked up. Plain and simple.
Put more succinctly: Wish in one hand, and shit in the other. See which one fills up first.
well even then dax actually touched on a big flaw with anti corporate right wing lolberts in his debate with andy, dax will happily call spotify cucks for enforcing rules they wish to enforce, yet they believe in a corporations right to enforce their own standards. if dax can ban jesse p or rand from np2 than why shouldnt patreon be allowed to ban ralph? forced association is a violation of the nap yet dax will bitch about hes being censored
Everything about Reethan is petite aside from the gunt. He's a little guy. It's not his fault, he came out of the womb two months too early because nature's Mari Kando decided that he needed to be put into the discard pile instead of the keep.
Here's a video of him with Jacob Wohl.
Observe the difference in the length of Jacob Wohl's tibias (leg bones) compared with Ralph even though Ralph is much closer to the camera. The radius and humerus bones (lower/upper arm) are also markedly different. Wohl exhibits typical proportionate bone growth while Ralph is a bit like the elephant man on display showing the cruelty of natural selection. Jacob Wohl is only 5" taller than Ralph's self-reported height, yet the differences in their physiognomy are staggering.
Also notice that there may be posture issues at play here as well, Ralph's neck is basically in his chest at a permanent 40° angle. He'd benefit greatly from some kind of posture corrector short-term along with lifting exercises to strengthen his core and bring that hump under control.
Basically he's got little feet, little arms, little hands, little legs. Just a little guy. It's not his fault he's small but he could work on the posture a bit and try to bring his gynecomastia under control. He's got these pendulous breasts just bouncing around under his shirt and it's downright obscene, maybe Chrischan could get him one of those bras for men to help him out.
This is getting surreal. I can't wait to see if Dlive will let him back on with his twitter sperging. Should we check the Richmond VA arson records? Perhaps gunty is a serial arsonist with how he loves to burn bridges?
Frequent enjoyer but infrequent poster in this thread; I'm on the right and think most of his audience is as well but to echo what @TwoDollarPeePeePooPoo and @instythot said, my interest in the is not political. I started watching him around the boulder stream for the fights and e-drama. His political takes are not and never have been interesting.
I keep up with him because I'm fascinated by his ability to fuck his life up in new and progressively worse ways and still be so full of himself. It's rubber-necking really.
Whatcha readin', Ralph?
